I Don't Know How To Say This

I didn't know why at the time
But I loved you so
I tried to speak but it ended as mime
And I didn't want you to go

I watched your face
Memorised the detail
Forever lost in this one place
Emotions clattering down like hail

Your hair was so soft
Your skins so smooth and tender
You eyes would take me aloft
And all I wanted to do was hold you and surrender

My instincts were raw
I wanted to hold your love forever more
But you never saw
How surviving around you regardless was such a chore

Your face was a vision of heaven
I couldn't forget it in a million years
I would have sinned for you, all seven
But rejection, brought to tears

Brutalised it seemed
I sank within
But memories can be cleaned
However I knew not where to begin

Lying alone in darkness
Attempting to make sense
As I ask forgiveness
Breathing alone at my expense

I did not want to hurt you
And you did not me
But you still don't have a clue
How hard it was for me to be

Sometime later, still trying to make it understood
Comforted by few if any
Nobody really could
Help me out of the hole I see with many

Unable to flee
You left me forever thinking
Do you see the heartache?
Because I'm still hoping

One day.
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