| March 25th 2002 Did You Ever Did you ever feel so depressed That you wanted to die? End it all by your own hands? Lose all and everyone around you? Did you ever think That it was so sure and strong? That it was what you wanted? That you were going to do it now? Did you ever start thinking When you picked up the carving knife? That what you would do Would destroy everyone around you? Did you ever stop before cutting To think of mum and dad finding you? To think of your friends being told? To think that some may follow? Did you ever feel so depressed That you wanted to die? I know one think that is certain I don't want to now The Veins The veins in my hands Are green and tinted red They bulge from my skin And pump me along the road The veins in my eyes Help me see all around me They glow when I am angry And recede when I grow fond The veins in my temples Scream when I am livid Then they fall away When I see you The veins throughout my body Keep me alive a day at a time So that I can see you And then maybe one day I can love you too Take Me Take me home Take me back Take me away from here Take me and never look back Take me to my mother Take me to my father Take me to my sister Take me to the brother I never had Take me where it is warm and safe Take me to where it is sure Take me to certainty Take me to normality I don't care where you take me Even if it is somewhere new Just take me away Away from this place Finale My face is blue And I am struggling to breathe I feel the pain through and through me What comes my way is death by profession His robes swirl at his feet Near my low and shriveled form His staff clatters with the sky And I am taken away My body continues to grow cold and dark My eyes shut and cannot be opened more My hands seal around my draped form And my feet curl inwards on cold slabs I am cracked down and face the judge Held in limbo throughout proceedings I am guilty as I wasted my life And now I get another chance Read Between The Lines How can I tell you? About all the things in my head The evil things and the good things Reversing over my conscience Even throughout the night Dragging their dirty shoes around It is strange to think Strange to keep still Growing always stronger Organising themselves in preparation Of invasion so sweet of my eyes Dropping into the pool eagerly Going Further I go out of my way To prove I can't go away So that maybe you'll accept me Maybe then you'll see See how much I am in awe And see how I am so sore That you declined No matter how hard I shined We remain as friends This, as you say, blends More so than going further with it But can't we go a little further, just a little bit? Then maybe you'll see why I love you so much I cry Cry out your name in your absence But no matter what, it won't make much sense Amends Stay away Leave me here to bleed a while In the darkness that will obey Before I emerge, I must crawl a mile The darkness swallows Consuming all sins or unwanted thought So that I can avoid the gallows For some time I will remain caught Struggling under the pressure of it all Trying to find and answer To my question behind the wall Remaining silent, I pulsate with cancer This seems to go on for ages But it eventually ends And I no longer suffer the rages For I have made amends |