The Gents dropped seven catches and missed the most obvious run out you’ll ever see, but still scraped a dramatic win at 7.45pm when Phil Hill caught Pearce’s forward-defensive prod at silly mid-off. They won because their drops were less important. Saints spurned no fewer than thirteen catches, none of the four main scorers producing a chanceless knock. But this game will always be remembered for the outrageous shifts in fortunes at the halfway point of each innings. The Gents took drinks at 42 for one off 23 overs; 142 runs came off the final nineteen. Saints then compiled a fine 58 run opening stand in 20 overs before losing all their wickets for the addition of 55 runs, doubtless stunned by Phil Hill’s amazing run out to see off Andy Jones.

Cricket’s Book of Days celebrates The Gents’ visit to Town Park in two ways. First, the sun shines, bringing out the girlies. Gav Bloke, on top form all day, spotted a twelve year-old moppet and vowed to "put down a deposit on her cherry for a couple of years time" whatever that means. Second, eleven ethnic Gents can never be persuaded to make the trek to this beautiful ground. So, enter into the Allsorts XI Beggar associates Hill and Biggers, guest McDallas and Chad’s likeable cobber Richard Cooper, who was signed up in the Wheatsheaf after the game. Saints’ attack is not what it was in the mid-90s when Webster and Rogers were charging in, though Cronin was too good for Swiss Tony in the second over. For the next hour, a succession of slow but accurate bowlers forced Dallas and Biggers into their shell. And a carapace of considerable thickness it proved to be, prompting loud barracking from scorer Hillbilly and partner in crime Gav, always up for a jape. Snarler went out to umpire and told them to get on with it, which had zero affect until drinks were taken with only eighty minutes left before the declaration, Dallas having ground out 14 runs in 23 overs. A spongy pitch had now dried out a treat and seventeen runs came from Watham’s final over two overs after the restart. Now it was game on. The Gents’ batters charged into the bowling. Stevie B struck four fours before being stumped for 43 (that’s 174 in his last three knocks here) and Richard Cooper shone briefly but fluently. Then Big Eddie larruped 35, including two fours and two sixes (one over the safety netting, something only Chainsaw Mitchell and Masher had previously achieved for The Gents) in only 24 minutes at the crease. Dallas struck seven fours in his marathon and Colin Jones was given his first bat for The Gents. He might have been run out off any of his first three balls in the middle but pleasantly cover-drove his maiden club run. Whereas Saints’ ground fielding was good and their bowling persevering and generally accurate, their catching was a thing of fantasy. Not since Ashton last unveiled his porn collection have so many gone down. While none was a dolly, the infection spread and at the end of the innings the count was thirteen, though curiously not including Andy Mayhew’s tough skyer to out Eddie. Snarler declared at 4.50pm, ten minutes early, a decision that would prove to be wisely judged. A side lacking Trevor Mayhew and Swiderski from 1999 was not thought likely to make the runs, though Saints tend to be resilient batters. But Pongo wanted forty odd overs to try to force the win. The second half of the game would prove dramatic and hugely entertaining.

The experienced openers Steve Cotton and Andy Jones gave Saints an excellent start. The green wicket had dried out after Friday’s rain and neither batsman was seriously threatened. Cotton, The Gents’ recent nemesis, pulled the wayward Cooper for four in the second over and for over an hour they kept up a fair scoring rate of three an over. None of the seamers troubled them, though Cooper spurned a golden run out chance with the batsmen negotiating mid-pitch. He couldn’t decide whether to be really Australian and throw down the stumps with a direct hit, throw the ball into the bowler or walk in and remove the bails personally. Decision taken. He would run in a few feet and then underarm the ball in wide of the stumps. Bowler Hillbilly scrambled on the ground to retrieve his prize but the batsman made it home. Good stuff. Cotton had earlier edged Snelling in and out of the right hand of diving slip Dallas, but that was really the only chink of daylight for the visitors until the last ball of Phil Hill’s first over. Cotton drove hard and Phil, diving to his right, deflected the ball onto the stumps. Jones, backing up, was run out by a yard. It was a great moment for Phil, who like Dallas and Biggers always performs well in Gents colours. In his next over came a comedy moment. Berkeley fell over mid-run and Snelling opted for the English non-macho run out, gently rolling the ball back to the bowler, who finally got round to removing the leg bail when the batsman was halfway back to the boundary to join his pals. Then, in the next over, the 23^rd, the up for it Todd, bowling well in his first spell of 2000, castled Cotton. The game was in a state of transformation.

After drinks, taken with the score 69 for three, London Saints lost three more wickets in two overs. Phil bowled Mayhew third ball and with his sixth outed Hotston to a tremendous catch. The batsman struck a lofted drive in the vicinity of deep cover Cooper, on patrol fifteen yards inside the cafeteria boundary. Richard took a running catch in classic Aussie style, taking the ball with his palms outstretched and cupping them around the ball. This tip would later be passed on to Tony Buck during the usual evening of mayhem at the Duchess. When Wathan, whose 49 was Saints’ match-winner here in 1993, edged to a diving Colin Naish five balls later, all hope of victory for the hosts had gone. They therefore tried to block the draw, and came very near to doing so. Toddy signed off by bowling Nanton in the 29^th over of the maximum 43 The Gents could bowl. Cronin and Speedtwin added 21 but Snarler recalled himself from the lake end and castled the latter in the 33^rd over. He entrusted himself and Big Eddie to finish the job, but the southpaws Thomas and Cronin batted bravely. Fitch, having earlier dropped a lofted catch off Hill’s bowling, saw the very silly mid-off return the compliment and with four overs to go Saints looked they might survive. Then Cronin, who had grafted for fifteen overs, suddenly lost his rag to a well pitched-up ball from the Tyke. A huge lofted on-drive rose and plummeted near fielders Bignell and Cooper level with the stumps. Cooper called and took the ball without any fuss. Snarler’s last over saw Thomas edge through the slip cordon for four. Two overs remained, but Big Eddie needed only one ball to finish the job. Pearce, another left-hander, played forward defensive, but mistimed the ball into the grateful palms of Phil Hill in his close berth. The Gents had won an exciting victory, but Southampton had battled well and had even one of the catches offered by Bignell or Dallas been taken it might have been a different story. It was good to see Colin Naish back, all smiles and oddball wisecracks. With Chris Beaumont and him in the squad, the club is well covered behind the timbers.