| AURA |
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| "Why don't you have your aura photographed?" asked my wife. I glanced across at the equiptment. It was slightly less intimidating than an electric chair. "Does it hurt?" I asked bravely. "Of course it doesn't, you big baby. It captures the energy field around your body. Some people call it 'Kirlian' photography after the man who discovered it." "Nobody has a name like Kirlian Photography," I said. "Every living thing has an aura," continued my wife, ignoring me. "It is a snap-shot of the life force within you." The life force within my wife then pushed me violently in the back towards the chair, I stumbled and fell into place... |
| SAY CHEESE |
| "How much is it?" "Twenty-five pounds," said the man. "How much?" I choked, "I could get Lord Lichfield for that!" This was the Cornishman in me coming out. My wife gave me a withering look. I put it in my pocket for later. On either side of the chair were two metal boxes attached to the equiptment. I placed my hands on them and waited for the inevitable jolt. "All finished." said the man. "Never felt a thing," I said, rising from the chair with a smug look. "Nothing to it." The actual photograph took about five minutes to develop. I sat down next to a lady who would interpret the picture for me. As she peeled off the protective paper a wonderful spectrum of colours was revealed. Smokey, cloudy hues, and in the middle of it all was me. "As you look at the photo," the lady explained, "the colours on the right are entering your aura, while those on the left are leaving." It was similar to a psychic reading (except the ladies name wasn't Doris), she talked about the colours that were leaving my aura as events that had happened in the last two months. |
| Nick says 'Cheese!' |
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| My wife gave me a withering look. I put it in my pocket for later |
| She was completely accurate. She described how the aura soaks up energy from the body; for instance, if you have been ill it will show up in the colouring. It can also highlight positive traits, such as having a certain talent. I have a certain talent for impersonating Bruce Forsyth, but he didn't show up in my aura. I am a little colour-blind, and so to me, the different shades appeared rather mixed up, like a chicken tikka masala that had been accidentally dropped on to a highly patterned carpet. Luckily the patient lady took me through each colour. |
| Did this mean custard for tea? |
| An interesting swirl of yellow was entering my aura from the right. Did this mean custard for tea? Apparently not... she felt this meant I could be doing something creative in the near future. Could adding bananas to custard be classed as creative? "It could be painting ," she continued, "but I feel it's more likely to be writing." The deeper shades on the other side of the picture gave me the appearance of having had a lopsided blue rinse, a sort of'wind-swept Marge Simpson' look. My expert interpreter enlightened me... |
| "Blue can indicate having found your lifes vocation," she said, "definitely communication." "But I don't have anything to say." I replied (if you've read this far you will probably agree). "I think you need to try," she urged. "The more you do it, the easier it becomes. It's a bit like turning on a tap and just letting it flow," she said. So that's what I did. I started to write about anything and everything. I did it just for me. I wrote on the backs of receipts, on my shirt cuffs, up my arm and on my wifes best tablecloth. It's a wonderfully freeing experience, just doing something totally for yourself. |
| Try it, it can be anything - singing, poetry, drumming or even playing the Patagonian nose fluet (tricky if you have a heavy cold). You don't have to explain or justify it to anybody else, make it just for you. Later that evening, after a large bowl of bananas and custard, I was discussing the day with our 5-year-old son, Jim. I tried to explain to him about auras, energy, spirituality and ultimately God. He sat quietly for a moment. "I've seen God," he said. I was slightly taken aback. "Have you?" I asked. "What does he look like?" "Well, He's orange and He's got a square head." |
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