EOBC -- A couple of stories



Howdy from Fort Lost-in-the-Woods, Missouri!

Well, week four was pretty interesting. We took the 75 question exam on CSS (remember beans & bullets), maintenance, and supply. This time I dropped TWO questions -- both concerning supply. Sadly, I originally had them both marked correctly. But after I asked the proctor for clarification, I changed them. One of the questions read like this:

A Hand Receipt (DA form 2062) is required a) When issuing expendable items b) For issue of non-expendable or durable items c) When issuing items with a CIIC code of "X" d) For issue of weapons or protective masks

The credited answer is b. Which I had originally marked. But something bothered me about the answer. A temporary hand receipt (DA form 3161) may be used to issue non-expendable or durable items for a period of less that 30 days. Asking for clarification on the question, I asked, "The way I read this question is that NO OTHER FORM except DA form 2062 may be used in the scenarios below?" "Yes, that is correct." I was told. So I figured that, clearly, since I knew an exception to that case for answer b. It could not be a correct answer.

That will be the LAST time that I ask for clarification of a question on an Army exam. When I explained my case at the test review, I was told that I was "Reading too much into the question." Obviously so. I wasn't going to press the issue too much since I scored pretty well -- and one person in the class failed the exam (got less than 70%). Nobody got 100% and two people only missed 1 question. So I am tied for 2nd in the class rankings. Still hanging in there!

"The smoking hot lieutenant"

You know when I said that I had made my last mistake at EOBC. Yup, you guessed it. I made another one.... but luckily, I didn't get caught. Here's the story: This particular morning we had a briefing by the battalion commander early in the morning so we didn't do Physical Training (PT -- this is what wakes me up in the morning and gets my brain going.) At the end of the brief there was some time before our next formation, so I came back to my room to add on a layer because it was pretty cold (starting to snow) and we were going to be outdoors for a portion of the day.

Well, I take off my BDU (camouflage) shirt and put on the sweater. Then I notice that I have time to make a little coffee and check my email. The next thing you know it's time to go so I grab my Gore-Tex (TM) jacket and head out of the door. So, outside in formation I am looking all hunky-dory not realizing that I have forgotten to put on my BDU shirt (the part of the uniform that has your name and rank on it.) Nobody can tell because it is completely covered up by my jacket. As soon as we get inside and everyone is taking off their jackets I have a horrible realization.

... I cannot take off my jacket.

Maybe nobody will notice. "Are you cold? It's warm in here -- maybe you are coming down with something?"

"Uh, yah, I'm a little chilly" I say with sweat running off my forehead. I really felt like a doof.

Luckily, a buddy who had to go back to the barracks during the day saved me. I gave him my room key and he picked up my BDU top. I owe him a big favor now.

This letter is getting long, but I want to tell one more story before I wrap up.

"Cattle Car Fiasco (MICLIC Live Fire)"

The cadre had told us all week that we were in for a special treat. We were going to watch a MICLIC do a live fire exercise. For those that don't know, the MICLIC is a piece of equipment that is used to clear a path through a minefield. What it does, is shoots a couple of rockets across the mine field. Attached to these rockets is a string with C4 explosives all along. Then, the C4 is detonated to clear out a path. So you can see why we were all very excited.

We are told to pack a lunch because we will have to go on our lunch break. So we all pack a lunch and when the time comes we are all crammed into a cattle car, No kidding a real cattle car, and are hauled out to the live-fire range. After 20 minutes of being jostled around like a Lotto number ball by an old New York City cab driver turned beef hauler, we find that we were two hours too late. Apparently, "Soldier" magazine showed up early and wanted to take photos right away.

So without exiting the cattle car, we did an about-face and headed back.

Although disappointing, nobody seemed to be too bothered. The Army trains you well to "Hurry up and wait."

So Friday morning rolls around and everyone is excited about having a couple days off. Well, the cadre know this, and take the opportunity to give you something to remember them by over the weekend..... Friday PT. I was still sore on Monday.

Our company commander put us into teams and had us doing sprint relays. We simulated carrying weapons by carrying those large orange traffic cones. First 25m, then 50m, then 100m, then 400m. I almost puked twice. And of course, in between we are doing push-ups and sit-ups.

By the way, if you are receiving this, and wish to be taken off of the distribution list. Please send an email to [email protected] with the subject line "Take me off of your friggin email list!" - I be sad if I get one.

Well, I had better close. I will leave you with a few quotes (some taken out of context) from my instructors.

Patriotically yours,
LT Nick Kliewer


"Most of the time you are going to have what you have
on-hand." CW2 Mannin on Maintenance

"It is possible to know too much about your subject."
Mr. McFarland on Briefing to Inform

"Don't let your soldiers do dumb things that are going
to kill them. ... You are going to need them to accomplish
your mission." MAJ Gadson on NBC Warfare

"Many times, as a Lieutenant, in METT-T, the enemy is
knowledge." CPT Read on Terrain Analysis.



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