EOBC 11 weeks down -- Extend to the left, March
Hello family and friends,
Well, There now is only six weeks left of EOBC. Not
that I am counting.... yes, I'm counting. Sorry
that I haven't sent out an update in a while, but I
have been terribly busy these last couple of weeks.
In my last update, I was squad leader during week eight
which meant that I was in charge of the 10 people in my
squad. Last week I was Platoon Sergeant. Which meant
that I was in charge of all 33 people in my platoon.
But wait, there's more: The First Sergeant (guy in
charge of the company) last week was having a baby
(well, his wife was) so that meant that I had to fill
in for him. So, the next thing you know, I am holding
all of the formations and getting accountability of the
entire class. It was actually not so bad, but it was
time consuming.
Last update I also forgot to mention that the officers
from the 5778th COSCOM (my RTU unit) came out to visit
me! It was great. All colonels. COL Colvin,
COL Hunter, LTC Fowler, and LTC Risher all made the
long haul from Dallas to visit me for the weekend. We
had a great time. One of the best parts was when they
all showed up to meet one of my training cadre. He
looked at me like "Damn Kliewer, I didn't know you were
so well connected!" We went out to dinner at an Italian
restaurant and harassed the waitress. Then, later on
we went flying. Since there is only a two-seater airplane
here, they all took turns. Except COL Hunter. He is
actually a flight instructor. I had no idea. I was so
impressed that these guys would come out to visit a
lowly 2nd lieutenant. Thanks gentlemen. I had a great
time.
My father wrote me not too long ago and asked "Why don't
you tell more about the guys that you buddy around with?"
Good idea. I'll tell you about my battle buddy Tim Hilfiger.
Hilfiger was unlucky enough to be squad leader for the
first couple of weeks. He and I met right away. We are
two of the three lieutenants that got a direct commission.
We are also both prior service noncommissioned officers
(sergeants). When he saw that on the roster, he asked me
to be his team leader. I hesitated for a moment, then he
said "I'll do it for you when you are squad leader." of
course I agreed. He asked if I needed a ride to PT the
next day since parking is tight at PT. So I took him up on
his offer. We have been riding together to PT ever since.
Plus, about 10 minutes before we need to head out, we call
each other to make sure that the other is awake. It's
pretty cool to have a buddy like that.
So, I'm sure that you are wondering.... Hilfiger... is
he related to..... No, not related to Tommy. But as you
can imagine. Everyone who meets him asks that right off
the bat. He is very gracious when he answers. Really
nice guy. He is a reservist as well. His civilian job
is working for a cable company. He is from Pennsylvania
and has a strong east-coast accent. He and I have started
making up nicknames for some of the more colorful
lieutenants. Cookie Monster and Blue Falcon are the best
so far. Cookie monster is self-explanatory. If you saw
the way her eyes roll you would understand EXACTLY why.
Blue Falcon (BF), is a term used to describe a person who
screws his buddies over. Especially if he can look
better by doing it.
Sadly, we have a few in the class. Those are people that
you just avoid cause you know that they'll turn you in if
they see you doing anything wrong. One of the biggest BF's
I've seen so far is when we were reviewing our last test,
which 1/3 of the class failed. A couple people had argued
that one of the questions was bad and should be thrown out.
CPT Boggs (I dare say our best instructor so far) had
agreed to throw the question out when LT Attaway (aka
Atta Boy and Blue Falcon) chimed in. "Sir, look, it says
right here......" "So it does," Said CPT Boggs "Then the
question will stand." I don't know how many people that
would have saved from failing, but I can imagine that they
were pissed off. Sadly, this was probably an unintentional
BF. Attaway is an aerospace engineer. That should say it
all. Engineers are like that. There's a joke about an
electrical engineer who, while in the electric chair,
told the warden was having problems executing him was that
two wires were not connected.
So, somewhere in week nine, someone stepped on my hand at
PT and it hurt like hell but I figured that I'd just
suck it up and hopefully it would get better. Well, it
didn't get better. In fact, it got worse. It got so I
couldn't open a jar or shake someone's hand. When the
Battalion commander shook my hand I wanted to cry. So I
knew that I had to go get it x-rayed. I went into the
doctor (by the way) army doctors are NOT known for their
bedside manner. He said, "What seems to be the problem."
"I think my hand is broken." "What makes you say that?"
"Because it hurts." "Well, it is swollen, so you might
be right. We'll have it x-rayed."
Well, the x-rays turned out that it wasn't broken, so
they put me into a splint that has my fingers bent at
a 90 degree angle, told me to soak it in warm water 15
minutes each evening, and take two Naproxen per day.
I asked if he couldn't put a fiberglass cast on it so
I didn't look so lame. No dice. So here I am saluting
with this splint on my hand. I felt like such a goof.
The splint comes off Wednesday (hopefully) and I'll be
good as new.
It just so happens that Wednesday is the final PT test.
Even though I have been out of commission for a couple
of weeks, I'm sure that I won't have a problem passing.
I have even gotten good at one-armed push-ups! Well,
I can do eight before going to my knees. We have been
running a few long distance (5-6 mile) runs, and I am
doing OK. Should be ready to train for the White Rock
Marathon when I get back. Now that I am back in shape,
I plan on keeping it that way. I am feeling good about
my body. I'm not the 20 year old that I was when I was
here in basic training. But I still feel pretty good
about myself.
My class rank has dropped considerably. Last I looked
I was ranked #21. I lost motivation about week nine.
So the last two exams I didn't do that well on. I
passed just fine, but nothing stellar. I'm disappointed
in myself at falling out of the top 10.
It seemed like all of the things I was being tested on
wasn't representative of understanding the material.
For example (hypothetically), the Army wants you to be
able to make a Peanut Butter aNd Jelly (PBNJ) sandwich.
So someone has to make up a process for it:
Step 1. Receive the bread.
Step 2. Determine type of peanut butter.
Step 3. Determine type of jelly.
Step 4. ..... ad nausium
I'm getting tired of trying to remember what step 4 of
the Army's method of making a PBNJ sandwich is. It has
almost nothing to do with your ability to make a PB&J
sandwich.
For example: There is a formula to determine if you
have enough time to emplace a minefield in front of the
enemy before he is upon you. It's the R > EACT formula.
Where R is the time that it will take the enemy to
reach you; E is the time it takes to Emplace the
minefield; A is the time that it takes to Arm the
minefield; C = Command and control time; and T is the
time it takes you to travel to the place where you will
put the minefield and to get out of their firing range.
Of course, there is a cookbook process for this as well.
Step 1, step2, and so on. It's not enough that you can
use the formula, but you must have memorized the name of
the steps as well.
Well, after a good weekend, I am in better spirits and
ready to charge on. Me and a few buddies enjoyed some
sunshine this weekend and played 9 holes on the "golf
course." We did more golf cart four wheeling than golf,
but it was great to get away. Thanks for all of the email
and cards and goodies. It really lifts the spirits to get
something in the mail and to get a note from the "real
world."
The next exam is next Monday (Horizontal construction)
and worth 1/6 of our total course grade. So I will be
studying for that one! We have moved into the civil
engineering portion of the course which is much more
interesting than how to place a minefield.
The week after next, we will be going to the "field"
for two weeks. (The field is the Army's term for
stranded out in the middle of nowhere with only what
you brought in on your back). Please pray for good
weather! Nothing sucks as much as being in the field
during bad weather. Once your uniforms get wet, they
never seem to dry out enough. The other thing that
sucks is the ticks. I hate, I hate, I hate ticks!
The nastiest little creature known to man. Anything
that burrows into your skin without permission should
be eliminated from the eco system. A friend told me
to start eating matches. Hmmm.... sounds strange,
but maybe it's worth a try.
I had better send this out and get to bed. I'll
attach a couple PIX and close with a few quotes.
Also, here is the question on the exam that a lot of
people missed. Probably because they tried to follow
the "5 steps."
Dress right dress,
LT Nick Kliewer
Q. If it takes you 10 minutes to emplace a volcano
minefield, two minutes to arm, 3 minutes of command
and control, and six minutes round trip to and from
the minefield site. And the enemy travels at 20 kph.
How far must the enemy be away from the minefield
site if you are to have the minefield ready in time?
* NOTE -- Some of these are a little graphic.
"What's that red line?"
"That's represents a battalion sized enemy element."
"Why is it on our side [of the battlefield]?"
"I guess were hosed aren't we?"
- LT Lewis and CPT Boggs on battlefield analysis
"If you don't get your people out in time, you'll
become pink mist." "What's 'pink mist'?" "That's
when a body gets hit by a big artillery round."
-CPT Boggs
"I recommend that if you're not sure if you can kick
someone's ass, you shouldn't start a fight with them."
- CPT Boggs on Engaging the enemy
"Denseness is... uh..... is uh... density."
-SFC Hylsky on Military soil analysis
"By no means am I politically correct and I don't give
a shit about being politically correct either."
-SFC Bell Before sharing wartime engineeering anecdotes
And the winner is......
"Can anyone explain what the 'pucker factor' is?"
"Sir, it's when your asshole becomes 'this tight'"
Shows an O.K. sign closing
"Because you are scared." -- LT Pavlik and MAJ Kramer
LT Hilfiger after setting a timber cutting dynamite charge.
One of the huge explosions we made on the demolitions range.
Me and LT Brennaman after tying off C4 and TNT to the det cord ring main.