Simmons: Hey?
Grif: Yeah?
Simmons: You ever wonder why we're here?
Grif: It's one of life's great mysteries isn't it? Why are we here? Are we the product of some cosmic coincidence or is there really a God watching everything, you know, with a plan for us and stuff. I don't know man, but it keeps me up at night.
Simmons: What? I mean why are we out here in this canyon?
Grif: Oh, uh, yeah.
Simmons: What was all that stuff about God?
Grif: Uh, hm, nothing.
Simmons: Do you want to talk about it.
Grif: No.
Simmons: You sure?
Grif: Yes.
Simmons: Seriously though, why are we out here? As far as I can tell, it's just a boxed canyon in the middle of nowhere. No way in or out.
Grif: Mhm.
Simmons: The only reason that we set up a red base here is because they have a blue base over there. And the only reason they have a blue base over there is because we have a red base here.
Grif: Well, yeah. That's because we're fighting each other.
Simmons: No no, but I mean, even if we were to pull out today and they were to come take our base they would have two bases in the middle of a boxed canyon. Whoop-dee-fucking-doo.
Grif: What's up with that anyway? I mean, I signed on to fight some aliens. Next thing I know, Master Chief blows up the whole Covenant Armada and I'm stuck in the middle of nowhere, fighting a bunch of blue guys.

Tucker: What are they doing?
Church: What?
Tucker: I said, what are they doing now?
Church: God damn, I'm getting so sick of answering that question.
Tucker: Hey, you have a fucking rifle. I can't see shit. Don't bitch at me because I'm not going to just sit up here and play with my dick all day.
Church: Ok, ok look. They're just standing there and talking, ok? That's all they're doing. That's all the ever do is just stand there and talk. That's what they were doing last week, that's what they were doing when you asked me 5 minutes ago. So 5 minutes from now, when you ask me "What are they doing?", my answers going to be: "They're still just talking and they're still just standing there.
Tucker: What are they talking about?
Church: You know what, I fucking hate you.

Grif: Talk about a waste of resources. I mean, we should be out there finding new and intelligent forms of life. You know, fight them.
Simmons: Yeah, no shit. That's why they should put us in charge.
Sarge: Ladies, front and center on the double.
Simmons: Fuck!
Grif: Yes Sir.