I thought that all four of my fans across the world would like to know a little more about the man behind the legend. So here's how I falsely answered a questionaire I stole from someone else's web site. It's supposed to be funny, but it's probably not.
Name: | Nic |
Full Name: | Nic: World's Greatest Lay |
Aliases: | Mr. Cunnilingus |
D.O.B.: | 7.4.1776 |
Sex: | Male, I think, let me check, hey where'd my..., oh there it is, yep male |
Hair Color: | Bald |
Eye Color: | Clear: Glass Eyes |
Height: | Varies whether I'm standing or sitting down |
Weight: | That's a question you never ask a lady |
Blood Type: | C |
Who Named You: | That one dude |
Father's Name: | Time |
Mother's Name: | Earth |
Place Of Birth: | Where I was born |
Astrological Sign: | No Right On Red |
Sexual Orientation: | Left |
Tattoos: | I have all the Ham Hams from Hamtaro on my back |
Best Character Trait: | I'm sexy |
Worst Character Trait: | I'm sexy |
Best Physical Trait: | My pinky toe |
Worst Physical Trait: | My big toe |
Associated Color: | Grue |
Celebrity I Am Most Like: | God |
My First Act As President Will Be: | Annual "Sex the Prez" Day |
TV Show I Would Love To Star In: | Cops |
My Worst Fear: | That someone is dumber than I am |
# Of People Are On My Buddy List: | Buddy this |
Stuffed Animals: | Does taxidermy count? |
Something I Do That Pisses People Off: | Give funny answers to questions |
What I'm Thinking Right Now: | Damn this thing is long |
What I Eat: | I'm not touching that one |
When I Wake Up: | Whenever the girl kicks me out of bed |
When I Go To Sleep: | 2 minutes after I "arrive" |
# Of Pillows: | Do girls count? |
Phrase I Over-Use: | "Yo Daddy" |
What I Do When I'm Bored: | You |
Relationship With Parents: | I have a pedophilic Edipus Complex. I want to kill my son and sleep with my daughter |
I Look Like: | You Sound |
I Have Respect For: | No one |
My First Car: | Hot Wheels! |
Most Embarrasing CD I Own: | Aol 1000 Free Hours |
Most Prized Posession: | Hello Kitty vibrator |
I Treasure: | Hello Kitty vibrator |
I Hate: | Hate is such a strong word |
Something I'm Looking Forward To: | Whatever is in front of me |
Last CD I Bought: | Bought? |
Last Movie I Saw In The Theatre: | Bambi |
Last Time I Cried: | Cried "wolf" maybe |
Last Time I Was Sick: | I'm always "sick". |
Last Person I Called: | The Ghostbusters |
Last Thing I Said: | The Ghostbusters, what did you forget already? |
Last Time I Had A Serious Talk: | I'm never serious |
Last Time I Laughed: | When was the last time I saw your face? |
Last Time I Made Someone Laugh: | No one laughs with me, they only laugh at me |
I Believe In Reincarnation: | I've lived more in one lifetime than most people live before obtaining |
I Believe In Angels: | I'm here aren't I? |
I Believe In Aliens: | Of course I do. It was a great movie |
I Believe In Accidents: | That's how I was born. |
I Believe In Fate: | You know what they say, "Fate is just Fat with an 'e'" |
I Believe In Ghosts: | Another great movie, there were thir13en |
I Believe In Santa: | I worship Santa |
I Believe In Myself: | "I believe I can fly, I believe I can touch the sky" - That Child Molester Guy, Not him the other one, the one that's still black |
My Personal Beliefs On...: | It's all good |
What I Think Of When I Hear "Chicken": | "Finger Lickin' Good" |
What I Think Of When I Hear "Love": | It's a love-hate thing |
What I Think Of When I Hear "Laura": | Bush |
What I Think Of When I Hear "Guys": | Depends on what they are saying |
What I Think Of When I Hear "Movies": | Stealing |
What I Think Of When I Hear "Shopping": | Six finger discount, hey I can't help it I was born that way |
What I Think Of When I Hear "Death": | A very rusty sickel, he really needs to clean that thing |
Life Is Like: | A box of chocolates: expensive and with too many choices |
Dreams: | Are reality and reality is the dream |
The Sweetest Thing: | Was a movie where I got to see Cameron Diaz go down on Christina Applegate |
Video Killed: | The Porno Mag |
Hard Times: | I'm not touching that one either, maybe that's why it's still hard |
I Have Smoked: | I've smoked something |
I Have Had Sex: | "Warrior that terrifies, it's N.I.C., virgin 'till the day I die" - Sung to the tune of D & D by Stephen Lynch |
I Have Flown In A Plane: | Mile High Club, dissregard that last line |
I Have Gone To Church: | It burns! |
I Have Read The Bible: | It still burns!. |
I Have Been Friends With Someone No One Else Liked: | I'm friends with me |
I Have Stayed Up Till 4am On The Phone: | Yes, But I probably started the call at 3:55am |
I Have Tipped Over A Port-A-Potty: | I've been tipped over in a port-a-potty |
I Have Gone Skinny Dipping: | How do you dip foor skinnies? Is that like bobing for apples, but with skinny people |
I Have Said, "I love you", And Meant It: | Meant it? Damn, so close. |
I Have Broken The Law: | Shh |
I Have Been Convicted Of A Crime: | Shhhh |
I Have Bungee Jumped: | Snap!, No |
One Thing Nice About Someone I Miss: | To the person in my cross-hairs: Could you slow down some. P.S.: And a little less up and down movement when you walk. |
One Thing Nice About The Person Who Sent You This: | I stole this, so I guess I'll say, "Thanks for being an easy target." |
Parting Thought: | I pretty much did this whole thing for one person. (Twice) |