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Record Review

Taken directly from the magazine...
HOLOSKANKS PORNAUDIOPHY Wreck Age Recordings, Montreal, Quebec, Canada "19...18...17...16 (and so on)...3...2...1...Blast Off! --(Aaaauuuugghhh) - mmph - ahhh - I got some on your face...I got a little bit on my tongue". So starts THE HOLOSKANKS' (or more precisely a guy named NICOLAS MARKER) excursion into electronic porn. This is very listenable electronic pumping, with huge bassy distorted keyboards stained with tons of pornographic sound bits. Lacking in any sung vocals - all lyrics are supplied through such interesting sexual exchanges as "He fucked my mouth real hard. Then he licked my asshole". Sometimes these phrases and moans are looped to create a rhythm in themselves - other times they are isolated for maximum effect. The general rhythms and pace is fairly 'pounding' (reflecting the composer's primary obsession). Between the rhythmic thrusts of beat and all the hot talk - I'm getting aroused! OK, here's an experiment (since I'm not currently getting any, but charged enough by this release to wonder...) 'What would sex be like with the HOLOSKANKS' PORNAUDIOPHY as the romantic background'? If any of you reading this are currently in the position for sex on tap - get this release, take some drugs and fornicate to this and let me know how it turns out. (Even if it sux...c'mon...I just got ya laid). PS - I tried sex by myself to this...but it wasn't very good. "You like sucking cock?" begins and ends one of the tracks and is followed by 'mmmmphs' of agreement that get looped to create the intro - along with slurping sounds of well executed fellatio before bumpin' into the almost danceable bass beat with some twingy noise mixed in with the porn sounds. Most of this is listenable - some isn't. One track sounds like MARKER got too stoned with the drum machine and echo effects and it gets annoying quickly. The best part of this release is a choice number that goes something like this: "Today we are going to learn how to give a good blow job" (whicka whicka whicka whoo - whicka whicka whica whoo) "Women...we have to talk" (Whicka whicka) "I've been talking to men and they are not happy. They have not been getting their manly requirements of blowjobs" (Whicka whicka) "Now...never leave the balls out women" (Whicka whicka) I will be including this song on many a personal compilation I create in the future - just for its informational value. Bushman
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