[5.17]The Perfect Guy
The Perfect Guy Written by Rob Greenberg
Directed by Jeff Melman
=====================================================================
Production Code: 5.17
Episode Number In Production Order:
Original Airdate on NBC: 24th March 1998
Transcript written on 22nd July 2000
Transcript revised on 5th June 2001
Transcript revised 2nd on 1st April 2004
Transcript {nicholas hartley}
Act One
Scene One � High-Priced French Gourmet Shop
Martin is standing around with Eddie whilst Niles tastes some cheese
with his eyes closed. The French shopkeeper, Robert - which, should
be noted, is pronounced in a French accent with a soft t (it sounds
very much like "roe bear"), helps him.
Robert: Now for a difficult one.
Niles: [tastes] Firm, velvety rind, a bit smokey, mmm... applewood,
I think.
Robert: Oui.
Martin: This is what I get for sending you to sleep-away camp in
France!
Robert: Can I help you with anything else, monsieur?
Martin: No thanks, this six-dollar can of dog food will be fine. It
sure teaches me not to leave my shopping till the last minute
again.
Niles: [realizes] Oh, is it Reblochon?
Robert: You are good, Dr. Crane.
Martin: Yeah, he's a regular cheese whiz!
Niles: I'll take half a pound of the Reblochon and half a pound of
St. Andr� and I know I ask this every week but... is it here?
Robert: Is what here?
Niles: You know very well what I mean; the imported Swiss prosciutto.
Robert: Aaah, the Bidnelfleisch! I am sorry, if only you had been
here one hour ago...
Niles: Damn!
Robert: You would have seen it arrive.
He bursts into mocking, high-pitched laughter. Niles laughs a
little too - while breathing heavily and clutching his heart.
Robert: I have my fun with you.
Niles: [tormented] You do, Robert, you make me long for the days
when you barely spoke English. Slice, slice like the wind,
I'll take a pound.
Meanwhile, Martin is looking at some samples on a table.
Martin: Whoa! Eighteen dollars a pound! This salami's good, but
it's not that good.
Robert: That saucissons was aged for six months and was cured in a
small village at the foot of the Pyrenees at Gilder Brown.
It's a steal at that price.
Martin: You got that right, pal.
Niles: Dad, if you want to wait outside, I'll be through in a minute.
Martin: What? I'm fine. Whoa-ho, look at all these different kinds
of olive oil. Virgin, extra-virgin. [laughs] Extra-virgin?
How does that work? [laughs] Well, I guess if you can cure a
sausage!
Niles seems to be embarrassed.
Robert: Monsieur, I'm so glad you find my foods so amusing.
Niles: Oh, Robert, he's only joking, keep on slicing.
Martin: Oh, come on now, even you've got to admit this whole store's
kinda nutty.
Robert: Pardon?
Martin: Fourteen dollars for a pound of goat's cheese. God, at that
price I ought to be able to get a whole goat!
Niles: We're slicing.
Robert: [to Martin] Perhaps, Monsieur, you would be more comfortable
if you just waited outside.
Martin: You want me to leave, just come out and say it in plain
English.
Robert: Fine, leave from my store.
Martin: Okay, no problem. Come on Niles, you heard the man, he wants
us to [French accent] "leave from his store."
Robert: Don't hurry back.
Martin: Don't worry, all the money in the world wouldn't get me back
in this snob shop.
Martin exits as Niles stops in the doorway.
Niles: That man is my father, so obviously I cannot leave here with
a bag full of your merchandise.
Robert: Home delivery?
Niles: [quietly] Thank you. [shouts] No-one treats my father that
way... [quietly] Those olives, too. [shouts] No-one!
As he exits, Robert nods and puts the olives aside.
FADE OUT
OUT & IN
Scene Two - Radio Station
Frasier is walking the corridors of KACL outside his booth as a young
woman, Sharon, from the station, comes over to him.
Sharon: About the photo shoot tomorrow, will you be needing make-up?
Frasier: Oh, heavens, no!
Sharon: That's a good choice, because I think that you look very
handsome without it.
Frasier: Really? Well, I think you look very attractive with make-up.
Not that I'm saying you need make-up, it's that if indeed
you are wearing make-up, it's so expertly applied that I
wouldn't even know you're wearing make-up... [sighs] I'm sure
it looks like I'm wearing some rouge right now.
Sharon: I know what you meant, and thank you. Oh, Dr. Crane, I was
meaning to ask you: what do you think about two people who
work together dating?
Frasier: Oh, well, Sharon, I'm asked that question a lot and let me
tell you, the stark reality is that that situation is fraught
with...
Frasier looks up and cottons on to Sharon's come-hither-look.
Frasier: ...[smiles] delightful possibilities.
Sharon: So, are you free on Friday?
Frasier: Er, Friday, yes, Friday it is. After the show?
Sharon: Great.
Frasier: Great.
Sharon: Okay.
Frasier: Bye.
Frasier enters his booth with a smile on his face. In the booth, he
meets a handsome young man by the name of Dr. Clint Webber.
Clint: Dr. Crane?
Frasier: Yes.
Clint: Clint Webber. The station just hired me to host the new show
on health issues.
Frasier: Oh, yes, of course, Dr. Webber. Well, welcome to KACL.
Clint: I understand I'm in your debt for recommending my audition
tape.
Frasier: Oh, not at all, it was very good, very good indeed. Besides,
you know, we'd all gotten a bit tired of the last show that
was in that timeslot; "Bert The Backyard Gardener." A woman
in her latest crock gave new meaning to the term, "Potting
Shed"! [Roz enters] Ah, perfect timing, come Clint.
Frasier presents Roz to Clint.
Frasier: Roz Doyle, my producer, this is Dr. Clint Webber, the new host
of "Health Watch."
Roz: [taken aback] Hi.
Clint: Hi, great to meet you.
Roz: [flirting] So, er, you're new?
Clint: That's right.
Roz: And a doctor?
Clint: That's right.
Roz then lets out a school-girl giggle.
Clint: Well, I don't want to be late for that station tour. [exits]
Frasier: Well, again, welcome aboard, Clint.
Roz: Oh, my God, could I acted any goofier?
Frasier: Not without a set of fake buck-teeth!
Roz: He's so handsome, I can't work with someone that handsome.
[realizes] No offense.
Frasier: Oh, none taken. Granted, when it comes to the looks
department, Dr. Webber and I aren't in the same...
Roz: [jumps in] Species?
Frasier: Well, I was going to say "league," but species is so much more
insulting!
Bulldog enters in a mad rant along with Gil Chesterton.
Bulldog: This stinks, this is total BS! The chicks are all going nuts
over this new Webber guy. I'm supposed to be the only sex
symbol around here. [pulls shirt up showing his torso] Wait,
look at it, look at it. Come on, take your best shot.
Roz goes to him with her fists clenched.
Bulldog: Whoa-ho, not you! [indicating Frasier and Gil] One of those
guys.
Frasier: Bulldog, you're behaving immaturely even for you. Granted
the man's handsome but it's no reason to feel threatened.
Gil: I must confess, I didn't notice he was all that handsome.
The rest are shocked.
Roz: You didn't notice? [laughs] You of all people?
Gil: Just what are you insinuating?
Roz: Well, you know, you're a little... er....
Gil: For your information, I happen to be a happily married man.
The rest are shocked further.
Frasier: You're... married?
Bulldog: To a woman?
Gil: Of course to a woman! You've all heard me mention Deb.
Well, how often have I said, "I must be running along now,
Deb will be waiting."
Roz: We thought Deb was your cat.
Gil: She is not a cat! She is Mrs. Gilbert Leslie Chesterton,
a Sarah Lawrence graduate, and the owner of a very successful
auto body repair shop. Honestly, the conclusions people make,
just because a man dresses well and knows how to use a pastry
bag!
He exits with dignity.
Frasier: Well, that's the first time I've ever seen a man "in" himself.
FADE TO:
Scene Three - Caf� Nervosa
We see a very depressed Eddie lying on the floor of the Caf�. The
scene pulls up to show Niles and Martin sitting at the table beside
him.
Niles: Dad, I can't help noticing Eddie's looking a bit glum.
Martin: Yeah, he's mad at me. I gave him a can of that dog food from
your fancy gourmet place the other day.
Niles: He didn't like it?
Martin: No, he loved it, but now he won't eat anything else! He even
turned his nose up at a kosher pickle and he loves those. And
the bad thing is, I called all over Seattle and Frenchie's the
only one who carries that stuff.
Niles: I don't suppose you'd consider apologizing?
Martin: Forget it, I'm never setting foot in that store again.
Niles: If things get worse, there is a technique of sleep-feeding I
know. It involves an eye-dropper and a high fructose protein
shake.
Martin: Well, I don't know about that.
Niles: Well, it worked on Maris.
Frasier and Roz enter, they all greet each other and pull up a chair.
Niles: [indicating a rash on Frasier's cheek] Frasier, are you aware?
Frasier: Yes, I'm aware. We were taking publicity photos today, I had
an allergic reaction to the make-up I was wearing. I wasn't
planning on wearing any make-up at all but there's this
handsome new employee at the station, everybody's feeling
incredibly insecure about their looks. They were all
slapping their make-up on, so I too gave in to vanity. [Clint
enters and goes to the counter] And, like Icarus flying too
close to the sun I had to pay the price.
Martin: [noticing Clint] Wow!
Frasier: Thank you, Dad, I don't like to go with mythology too often,
but that was spot-on...
Martin: No, I mean that guy, he's so handsome.
Roz: It's him, it's him, Dr. Webber.
Frasier: All right, Roz!
Niles: Well, he is striking.
Roz: Frasier's just jealous.
Frasier: Oh, I am not jealous. Yes, the man is handsome, but I'm sure
there are a number of areas in which I am his superior. You
know, let's not forget that good looks can be a mixed
blessing. People just roll out the red carpet for you but
that robs you of any incentive to develop other qualities.
After a while you're left an aging narcissist bent at the
water's edge, realizing those lines in the pond aren't
ripples, they're wrinkles.
Martin: Amazing.
Frasier: Thank you, dad, I rather like that one myself.
Martin: That guy could be a movie star!
Frasier: All right, Roz, don't we have some work... [notices free
table] over there?
Niles: Oh, no, no, take this table, I have a session anyway.
Martin: Yeah, I gotta go too. Like Zeus riding his thunderbolt to
Mount...
Frasier: Very amusing Dad, off you go.
Martin takes Eddie and leaves with Niles as Clint comes over to the
table.
Clint: Dr. Crane.
Frasier: Oh, Dr. Webber. You remember Roz Doyle, of course.
Clint: Yes, hello.
Roz gives him a girlish laugh.
Frasier: Who could forget that infectious laugh?
Clint: Speaking of which, has anyone had a look at that rash?
Frasier: Oh, yes, everybody.
Clint: So, mind if I join you?
Frasier: Well, actually we were...
Roz: We were hoping you would.
Roz saucily pushes out a chair with her foot for him to sit at, he
sits.
Frasier: So, Clint, I see that you're a squash player. You know, if
you're up for a game some day, I used to play a bit back in
Harvard.
Clint: Well, I'd love to. Harvard? Wow! I was dying to go to
Harvard.
Frasier: Well, I'm sure the school you went to was just as good.
Clint: I went to Oxford.
Frasier: Oh, well, even better. So, did you go to medical school
there as well?
Clint: Yes, but I took a year off first to get my Master's in French
history.
Frasier: Ah?
Clint: Just wanted to do something fun.
Frasier: Mmmm.
Roz: Does that mean you speak French?
Clint: Certainement, pois je conte belle fais.
Roz gasps at his accent.
Frasier: Well, I too understand the importance in taking some time off
before beginning medical school. I spent that summer in Milan
studying the history of opera. In fact, I had the good
fortune to make an acquaintance and become friends with a
then-little-known young tenor by the name of Carreras.
Clint: Jose Carreras?
Frasier: Forgive the name dropping.
Clint: He's my godfather.
Frasier: [very jealous] You're joking!
Clint: No, I'll call him tonight, he'll be delighted to hear I'm
working with you.
Frasier: [laughs] I'll be interested to see if he remembers the game
we used to play where we pretended not to remember one
another.
Roz gives him a look.
Clint: You know, Frasier, that rash is starting to concern me.
Maybe I'll just pop out to the car and get my medical gear.
Frasier: There's really no need.
Clint leaves.
Frasier: Okay, maybe we can work now while he's gone. [Roz starts
fanning herself] Oh, Roz, for heaven's sake. You're behaving
like a starry eyed Bobby Socks-er. Yes, the man is good
looking, it's not like he can stop traffic!
We hear cars screeching to a stop outside.
Frasier: [off Roz's look] There's a blind corner out there, we don't
know that was him!
End of Act One
Act Two
Scene One - Radio Station
Clint and Frasier arrive in the booth to meet Roz who is on one of
her pregnancy cravings it seems.
Roz: How was your squash game?
Frasier: Oh, well, Dr. Webber neglected to mention that he was squash
champion back in college.
Roz: I'm sorry, Frasier.
Frasier: Oh, no, not at all. It was a lovely morning, Clint was
gracious enough to treat me to breakfast. Course, once we
arrived at "Le Ren�e," the chef had just cut himself. Clint
not only treated the wound but set about to making us a
flawless egg-white and truffle omelet.
Clint: I put myself through med school as a sous-chef at "Le Cirque."
Roz: Sometimes I just want to pinch you to make sure you're real.
Roz goes to him but Frasier holds her back.
Frasier: He's real. [sits]
Clint: I'm just going to get a glass of water, I'll be right back.
[exits]
Roz: But you're about to start the show.
Frasier: Yes, I know, Roz, I thought it would be a good idea to have
Clint on, introduce him to my listeners, give his show a leg
up.
Roz: All right, you're plugging Clint?! I'm sorry, I'm having a
lot of trouble believing this buddy-buddy attitude.
Frasier: Roz, try as you may to insinuate that I have some seething
jealousy to this man, the fact is, I like Clint. Why else
would I be giving a party in his honour this evening?
Clint enters and sits.
Roz: Okay. You're on in ten seconds.
Roz exits to her booth.
Frasier: Yes, right up. Let's just slip on our headphones, and follow
my lead, okay? [presses button] Good afternoon, Seattle,
this is Dr. Frasier Crane. Before we start our regular
program, I'd like to take this opportunity to introduce you
to Dr. Clint Webber. Clint, if you're anything like I am,
you'll spend your first week trying to figure out what all
these buttons do.
Clint: Actually, in college I ran the radio station.
Frasier: Ah, well, things may have gotten a bit more sophisticated
since then. For instance we have here a cough button.
[presses and releases the button]
Clint: If I'm not mistaken that's the echo button.
Frasier: [laughs] Of course it is. All my listeners are familiar
with my now-trademark "echoing cough"! [laughs] Well, let's
go to the lines, take our first call, show Dr. Webber the
ropes, shall we? [presses button] Go ahead, you're on the air.
Marie: [v.o] Oh, hi, hi, Dr. Crane, it's Marie.
Frasier: Oh, hello, Marie, I'm listening.
Frasier signs to Clint how that's his little signature line.
Marie: [v.o] I, I've been having a hard time getting out of bed
every morning and when I finally do I'm irritable for hours.
Frasier: Really? Well, Marie, the desire to stay in bed is very
similar to the desire to regress to the womb. Some
unconscious fear is driving you to a place of safety.
Now, in order to resolve this problem you're going to
have to examine your life and discover just what it is
you're retreating from. It's hard but very necessary
work, I suggest that it maybe time to try some therapy.
Marie: [v.o] Wow!
Clint: You are good, Dr. Crane. The first thing that came to my
head was that she might be a little hypoglycemic, I'd have
suggested some protein in the morning.
Marie: [v.o] Oh, wait a minute. Last Thursday I had eggs for
breakfast and I felt great all day.
Clint: Well, maybe that's it, then.
Marie: [v.o] Oh, what a relief! You know, you scared the life out
of me, Dr. Crane.
Frasier: Yes, well, thank you, Marie. [presses button] But I think
it's time to say goodbye to Dr. Webber now and we'll be back
right after these messages. [signs off]
Clint: Thanks, Frasier, that was fun.
Frasier: Yes, it was, wasn't it?
Clint: I hope I didn't say anything out of line.
Frasier: Oh, no, no, not at all, I always enjoy learning something
new. Well, I'll see you tonight, don't be late.
Clint: I'm always punctual.
Frasier: [covers anger with a laugh] Of course you are!
Clint exits as Frasier leans over and calls through to Roz's booth.
Frasier: [lightly] I hate him.
FADE TO:
BONE APP�TIT
Scene Two � High-Priced French Gourmet Shop
Daphne and Martin enter and notice Robert is not there, only his
assistant.
Martin: Oh, he's not even here.
Daphne: Your luck's out.
Martin: [goes to assistant] Yes, I'll just take a case of that dog
food, please.
Assistant: Will that be all?
Martin: Yeah, that's it and I'm in a bit of a hurry.
Daphne: [picks up biscuits laughing] Look here, Nickerson's Lemon
Biscuits. God, these bring back memories. I just love
them. Do you carry the Raspberry ones as well?
Assistant: I'm not sure.
Martin: Could you come back for those?
Assistant: [calls back] Robert?
Martin: Oh, God.
Robert enters and notices Martin.
Robert: Well, look who's come back.
Martin: Look, why don't you just let me pay for this and get out
of here? What do I owe you?
Robert: I think we both know what you owe me.
Martin: All right. I'm sorry, I shouldn't have made fun of your
store. You gonna let me off the hook or not?
Robert: All right, I'll sell it to you. I never like to lose a
customer.
Martin: Well, great. You know, while I'm here I might as well take
a few cases.
Robert: We have several new varieties in if you'd care to take a
look.
Martin: Oh, sure.
Robert: Please, show the man.
The assistant takes Martin off stage to show him the dog food.
Daphne: [looks at her biscuits] Oh, I think these biscuits are
mis-marked.
Robert: [looks] No, that's correct.
Daphne: $14.95 for a package this small?!
Robert: I see we have another member of the price club!
Daphne: Hey, there's no need for that attitude. Back home I can
get these for 80 pence!
Robert: Well, I do have to fly these over.
Daphne: What did you do? Buy them a seat on the Concorde?!
Robert: Madame, if you cannot afford them, simply put them back.
Daphne: I can bloody well afford them, I just don't like being
gouged, this is robbery!
Robert: Robber! [he pronounces it "Ro-bear"] No-one calls me a
robber!
Assistant: [o.s] Robert?
Robert: Not now! [to Daphne] On your way out you will see a sign on
the door saying "Please come again." Disregard it!
Daphne: I'd be happy to. You know, Mr. Crane was right about you.
You're nothing but an arrogant, swindling little cheese-
monger.
Martin: [enters with dog food] This is great! I'll take a case of
each.
Robert: [snatches it away] You'll take a case of nothing!
Martin: What happened now?
Daphne: We don't need him or his food!
Martin: Yes, we do, he's got tarragon flavor now!
Daphne: Come on!
Martin: But Daph, what about Eddie?
Daphne: Oh, he'll eat when he gets hungry. For heaven's sakes,
he drinks out of the toilet!
Daphne pulls Martin out of the shop.
FADE TO:
Scene Three - Frasier's Apartment.
A huge crowd is gathered for the party as Clint tells them all a story.
Clint: So, George S. Kaufmann so dislikes what the actor is doing,
he sends the poor fellow a telegram reading, "I'm watching
your performance from the rear of the house, wish you were
here." [they all laugh] Sorry to jump in there, Frasier, but
I believe that's the story you started.
Frasier: Thanks for helping out.
Bulldog: [comes up to Frasier] Hey, Doc, I gotta hand it to you,
great way to welcome the new guy.
Frasier: Oh, well, really? I'm surprised you're even here at the
party. I didn't think you cared much for Clint.
Bulldog: Nah, I'm over that. I figured, he can't have every chick.
So if we pal around, I bag the leftovers.
The doorbell sounds.
Frasier: Ah, the regular busboy romance. Excuse me. [opens door to
Niles] Niles.
Niles: How's it going?
Frasier: Well, let me see, what have you missed? Clint told us about
how he learned to fly a plane, and then he recited a sonnet
and, oh yes, he fixed my ice machine and he invented a new
drink; the "Pink Webber"! He's got Daphne drawing a bath
right now, in case the party starts to lag, he invited to
walk on water, liven things up a bit.
Niles: Well, don't let it make you crazy, Frasier. At some point
we all run into someone who's our superior.
Frasier: It's just that I've never dealt with this sort of thing
before.
Niles: Never?!
Frasier: I can see how that might be baffling to you, as my younger
brother, you dealt with this thing all your life.
Niles: Yes, well, at least we know he won't out shine you in the
egomania department! [takes a "Pink Webber"]
Frasier: You're right, I'm being a bit silly about this thing, I
suppose. I just wish I could one flaw, one area where
I'm his superior.
Niles: Well, I'm sure you will.... [takes a sip] Although it won't be
in the drink department, this is heaven in a glass!
Frasier walks off to Clint who is mulling over a chess game that is
set out on the side.
Clint: Oh, Frasier, I was just admiring this chess board, it's
beautiful.
Frasier: Thank you. Do you play?
Clint: No, I've read a book or two. Are you in the middle of a
match?
Frasier: Well, yes, as a matter of fact, I'm playing by mail with a
Russian grand master. It's quite challenging.
Clint: Well, congratulations. With your cunning use of the
Zekreptsky attack, you're only four moves away from certain
victory!
Frasier: [looks] My God, you're right. And actually I'd be happy to
hear that, except I'm playing black, well... wasn't that a
fun eight months!
Frasier walks off to find Sharon.
Frasier: Hello, Sharon. Sorry we haven't had a chance to speak much.
Sharon: Oh, I know but I'm really looking forward to our date on
Friday.
Frasier: Yes, so am I, and you look absolutely beautiful - or should
I say...
Frasier speaks some Mandarin which Sharon laughs at.
Frasier: Oh Boy, what's so funny?
Sharon: Well, you just told me "I was as a lovely as a chicken
beak."
Frasier: Oh, really? [he repeats the Mandarin and Clint overhears]
Clint: Who's as lovely as a chicken beak?
Sharon: You speak Mandarin?
Clint and Sharon begin having a conversation in Mandarin. Frasier
leaves them to it in despair to the kitchen. Soon, Clint follows as
the pianist strikes up "Isn't It Romantic."
Clint: Frasier, I just wanted to thank you for this party.
Frasier: Oh, don't mention it.
Clint: It's been a perfect evening; The hors d'oeuvres, the company,
the music. Oh, I love this song.
Frasier: Enjoy.
Frasier leaves the kitchen and overhears Clint singing along to
"Isn't It Romantic" in a voice that would cause plastic to wish it
could shatter.
Clint: "Isn't it romantic?
Music in the night...
Frasier enters.
Clint: Oh, I'm sorry, I was singing too loud.
Frasier: No, no, not at all. I can't tell you how much I'm enjoying
hearing it.
Clint: Careful, it doesn't take much coaxing to get me to perform.
Frasier: Really?
Clint: Oh, yes, get a glass of wine in me, before you know it, I'm
serenading the entire room.
Frasier: Really?
Clint: Oh, I'm afraid I have a bit of the old ham in me. [laughs]
Would it be presumptuous to sing in front of your guests?
Frasier: Well, I think we could persuade the piano player to play it
again.
Frasier and Clint enter the main area. Frasier goes over to Niles as
Clint makes his way to the piano.
Frasier: Niles, Niles, I've done it. I have found his Achilles Heel!
Niles: Ah, who's?
Frasier: Clint's! Oh, I just heard him singing, the man is completely
tone deaf. He's about to launch into a rendition of "Isn't
It Romantic" that will simply peel the enamel from your teeth!
Niles: Are you sure you want to let him do that?
Frasier: What do you mean?
Niles: Well, you have your victory, you're a wonderful singer.
Isn't it enough to know that? Do you really need to see
him humiliate himself?
Frasier thinks this over for a few seconds.
Frasier: Yes.
Niles: Now, Frasier...
Frasier: No, no, no, I know, you're right. I guess I am a bigger man
than that.
Daphne comes over.
Daphne: Hey, Dr. Crane, your friend, Clint, he's quite a charmer.
Frasier: Yes, he is, isn't he?
Daphne: Yeah, do you suppose he's single? [this alerts Niles] I was
just getting up the nerve to give him my phone number.
Clint announces to the crowds.
Clint: Excuse me, everyone. I just want to thank you all for this
warm welcome to KACL and as a token of my gratitude, I'd like
to share this song with you.
Frasier: Clint, there's been a little change of plan...
Niles: Yes! I'm going to be your accompanist now!
Niles quickly runs over and takes his seat at the piano. He starts
to play as Clint sings in the same awful voice.
Clint: "Isn't it romantic?
Music in the night,
A dream that can't be heard...
Isn't it romantic?.......
Niles gleefully continues playing. Frasier walks past a gobsmacked
Daphne. Among the disappointed and embarrassed guests, he suddenly
plays the voice of reason:
Frasier: Please, everybody... nobody's perfect.
The scene ends as Clint "sings" us out.
Credits:
Martin is standing outside the high price French gourmet shop
looking suspicious. He is covering his face with a newspaper whilst
looking through the windows into the shop. He quickly passes the
window so he isn't noticed and checks to see that no-one is looking.
A young boy comes out of the shop with a case of dog food under his
coat. Martin hands him some money, however the kid says it's not
enough and is ready to take the dog food back. However, Martin
relents and gives him the whole wad of cash in return for a pack
of dog food. Martin takes the dog food and runs away with it in joy.
Guest Appearances
Guest Starring
BILL CAMPBELL as Clint Webber
DOUG BUDIN as Assistant
FRANCOIS GIRODAY as Robert
EDWARD HIBBERT as Gil Chesterton
LINDSAY PRICE as Sharon
Guest Callers
JILL CLAYBURGH as Marie
Legal Stuff
This episode capsule is copyright 2000 by Nick Hartley.
This episode summary remains property of Frasier, Copyright
of Paramount Productions and NBC. Printed without permission.