Babble: 12.07.98 1235pHST
I'm having bathroom troubles. No nothing is a matter with my bladder or colon. One of the boy's parents' tennants fucking hogs the bathroom every morning. It's like he knows I use the bathroom during this so and so time and makes it a point to get in there before me and stays in there close to an hour. Yes an HOUR. It is so fucking irritating. Like this morining, I wake up at 815....I start class at 930 mind you and UH is a 20 minute drive....and I wait....and I wait...and I wait....845 comes around and he's still fucking in the bathroom. I swear he whacks off in there or something. At about 850 I hear the shower go on. WHAT THE FUCK? Does it take him that long to take a SHIT? At 905 I hear the shower go off. Lets remember now that I start class at 930. 910 rolls around and I say fuck this already. I rinse my mouth in the kitchen sink and throw a few slashes of water on my face to get rid of the crustiness. I slap on my acceptable school clothing and take a piss in the garage toilet (it doesnt have a sink or shower). My chauffer (the boy pulls out of the garage at about 916). I make it on time and all but I'm all durteee and crusty and have morning stank eminating from my mouth.
Now this is only ONE of the many gripes I have about living here. I hate our room. I carpet is this nasty color (it seems like it WAS white). A few months ago we had this incident where SOMEBODY forgot to turn off the bathroom sink and water flooded out of the bathroom soaking our carpet. My pictures I was keeping in a box were RUINED and the stink off the old DANK carpet was horrible.
I never admited this before but I HATE living here. I'm so upset. I have to stay here for another 7 or so months. Ok wise guys. I know I can move out. But with what fucking money? Theres my debts, bills and a savings for NY.
Everything is always dirty here. No matter how much I clean this room in a matter of days is in the same filthy condition. Its always dusty. Its small. I just don't even bother cleaning up anymore because theres no point to it. I'll just be wasting my strength and energy. And the boy is a GUY. We know guys don't clean. Theres always scraps of reciepts or trinkets he brings home on my mini-dresser. HOW HARD IS IT TO WALK OVER TO THE TRASH CAN. Or like when I came home today. There's QTIPS on the computer desk. NASTY NASTY Qtips complete with earwax and some body dirt. FUCK MAN! THROW IT AWAY.
And the dog. There's DOG HAIR everywhere! EVEN THE CAR! They stick on my clothes even my underwear. And this dog chews on tissue and paper and they are littered on my carpet. I clean it and the next day theres double the trash and dog hair on the carpet.
And the gay sibling is another thing. I won't even go there now. Thats a whole page and a half of babble.
I am so upset. So so upset. I'm literally crying right now.
I don't want to move back home. My parents are bad for me. But living here is going to make me crazy. Maybe when the boy leaves for boot camp & training I will ban the dog from the room. And everyone else for that matter. It'll be just me and my psycho cleanliness domain. Thanks Sharon for rubbing some of that obsessive compulsive behavior on me.
I miss Sharon. She was so great at cleaning. I loved going into her room and smelling dust free air and neatly lined shelves and closets. Thats what I miss about home. Mom and Sha were so good at keeping everything so clean. I didn't even have to put any effort in it. Maybe this is God's way of payback, for not helping mom and Sha clean every weekend. I'm stuck in a house with filth. Things are only HALF clean here. Makes me feel so icky.
Fuck I have to use the bathroom. But Haole boy is in there again. I need to get out of here.
So miserable.
