[The sexy side of rain] [The start of a school term] [The magic of getting a second chance] [A must list for graduates] [Rules for Valentine's Day] [Winter's icy kiss] [Rules for the season of Lent] [Why Easter is better than Christmas] [In defense of being silly]
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It was a long time coming and well worth the wait.
In a 20-hour period from late Sunday afternoon to mid-afternoon Monday, about 4.33 inches of the life-giving moisture fell in great sheets throughout the area.
That�s more rain than had fallen in the previous 100 days combined. �We measured 1.5 inches Sunday afternoon and evening and another 2.83 inches between about 10 a.m. and 1 p.m. Monday,� confirmed Danny Combs, a longtime weather watcher.
And it�s not over yet.
�The forecast for your area is for the chance for more rain to return late Saturday into Sunday,� said Mark Fox of the National Weather Service.
�Until then, highs will be in the low 80s and lows in the 50s, with a chance of fog forming each night,� he noted.
This first good rain after so many months of below-normal precipitation caught me relaxing Sunday in my cabin in the woods west of town.
Great black clouds, laden with moisture, announced its coming earlier in the day, and the promise did not go unfulfilled, as it had many, many times before, almost as a tease.
The initial cloudburst around 6:27 p.m. (I glanced at the digital clock when I heard the first drops pounding the roof) summoned me to the screen porch, where I sat and luxuriated in watching this sorely-missed weather phenomenon that transfers moisture from the oceans to the landmasses of the world.
These raindrops were hitting the trees and the ground to a reception of sustained applause, which seemed appropriate.
The harder the rain fell, the louder the applause, until it became thunderous in both a literal and figurative way.
The leaves and the blades of grass had been parched, thirsty beyond what you or I could endure, so crackled with pleasure as they were splashed with a million wet kisses.
A frothy concoction resulted, tiny bubbles celebrating the recharging of the earth�s engine, now revving up to give life where death had been stalking.
It was majestic.
Tiny crowns proclaimed each raindrop�s sovereignty as it hit puddles that were forming where none had existed for more than two millennia, when measured in hours.
The rains of 100 days ago seemed so far away, part of another story in another era, but the memory of trees is long, as long as the tap roots that dove deeper and deeper into dry earth to find water as the long hot summer wore on.
Many trees died during that search, but now the silvery slices of life - dispensed drop upon drop - held out hope for healing.
Rain is the ultimate healing catalyst - it is not alive, yet nothing can live without its presence.
What the incessant sun and wind and heat had wrinkled, the rain was plumping back into juicy health.
Rain polishes, adding a glistening finish to all it touches, erasing the rough-edged textures that sucked up all light.
Beaded water droplets - like liquid diamonds - reflected the light into a thousand directions from each leaf, each blade of grass. The effect was one of a shimmering celebration of life, where a decorative array of raindrops mocked the ravages of drought.
The smell of life refreshed was thick : a slightly pungent aroma of sunburned hay and toasted grass bathed anew.
The wind worked the trees and bushes into a frenzy of flirting, waving to and fro in a come-on to the heavens to open up and give them its best shot.
Afterwards, when the deluge ended, the plop, plop of droplets resembled sweat from the heavenly exertion of all that rain-making.
That which could be renewed - was. That which could not - was broken off and will be discarded.
Nature wastes nothing.###
(c)2002 NewsSouth
Want to make this Valentine's Day really special?
Then cut this column out and read it until its message sinks in that thick skull we all have from time to time.
What you are about to read is good advice, because it came from a variety of women over the past month who spoke to me about this subject,whether they were aware of it or not.
I would shift conversations into this realm and take careful notes on the subject of creating the perfect Valentine's Day celebration for your loved ones, and here's what I found out:
WHAT WOMEN WANT
Besides "Mel Gibson," women - as an old mythical story goes - want "sovereignty" above all else. That means possessing the power and ability to have things their way all of the time.
Especially on Valentine's Day guys, you will be displaying a high degree of intelligence and creating a romantic atmosphere to boot if you recognize this basic truth.
The greatest challenge facing men is finding out precisely what that "way" is and then not only giving it to the cherished woman in your life but doing so with a particular style that reflects who you are as a man and how you feel about her as a woman.
How you handle Valentine's Day pretty much defines the reality of how you value your relationship with her, so treat the occasion with the appropriate amount of care, respect, and responsibility, based on your feelings for and knowledge of her, and you can't go wrong.
The trick here is being honest about what those feelings are and finding out more about her wants in time to do something about them BEFORE you run out of time, which is why I am writing this several days before the event.
You must do all you can to find out (from whom matters, since those who really know are her closest friends, relatives, and/or work associates) what she would really appreciate from you this year.
You must address her deepest desires, hopes, and, yes, fears in order to really touch her heart.
Perhaps it is an experience she craves instead of a possession. I once sent a magazine cut-out of four dozen gorgeous long-stemmed roses to my sweetheart with the note:
I adore you, and for what I would have spent on flowers such as these, I will instead give you an entire day at a spa with facial, massage,pedicure, manicure, and herbal skin-conditioning wrap.
There's only one catch: Will you be my Valentine, and share a quiet, private meal with me later, telling me all about the day at the spa?
P.S. You'll get the roses, too, but later, since my budget is limited right now and I had to buy rose bushes to grow them for you, which means I will be thinking of you every day as I care for them this spring.
By Easter you'll have your four dozen, long-stemmed beauties. I love you.
She kinda liked that, and respected that my budget was limited. The money thing was not (and is not) important to most women (the best ones).
What really counts here is care, respect, responsibility, and knowledge.
If your gift, no matter what it is, is handled with evidence of these four shining brightly, you will have a wonderful Valentine's Day.
So,
� Show you CARE by taking into consideration HER desires, hopes, and fears about ya'll's relationship.
� RESPECT her feelings about what she would really enjoy for Valentine's Day, then
� Take RESPONSIBILITY for planning and producing a really special Valentine's Day for her, based on the
� KNOWLEDGE you accumulate about the aforementioned things.
Don't you see that just taking more time to plan and then do all these things will make a huge difference to her, regardless of the money spent, regardless of what ya'll end up doing, of all the stupid mistakes you made in the past by not honoring her in this special way?
Now, get busy collecting information and creating a plan for her that will be well worth all of the time and money you will spend to make sure she knows how you really feel about her.
After all, building and maintaining good relationships leads to the most important thing in life:
The gift and return of love.###
(c)2002 NewsSouth
These words can create magic in people�s hearts: �You have another chance.�
Aren�t there times we all need to hear those words spoken?
It implies not only forgiveness for a past failure and encouragement to do better, but also that the human spirit can rise above a bestial level of existence. How many animals grant �another chance� to fellow animals?
Punishment of some form or another, where �getting another chance� is not an option, will always exist. And in some cases, �another chance� is not warranted.
More often, though, saying to someone, �You have another chance� is precisely what�s needed to create an atmosphere of renewal and the confidence to try again.
� Getting another chance does not mean erasing an earlier failure, it does something much more important: It means transcending it, rendering that failure as a relatively unimportant event in the grand scheme of things.
� Getting another chance elevates hope over fear, faith over doubt, optimism over pessimism.
� Getting another chance makes the future more important than the past, and the present the most important of all.
� Getting another chance requires inspired vision, and cannot survive short-sightedness. One must be able to see clearly what good another chance might produce, then go about using the opportunity to realize the vision.
� Getting another chance creates feelings of gratitude and responsibility, for who wants to squander �another chance�?
It puts the pressure where it belongs: On the person getting another chance. Now they must make the most of it.
� Getting another chance is, after all, what we want for ourselves and grant to ourselves all of the time, whenever we can manage it.
We go from one diet and/or exercise program to another. We stop and start bad habits over and over. We make a mistake and it goes unnoticed.
In each case, �another chance� was achieved.
This is a good time to say �you have another chance� to someone you care about, so don�t miss the opportunity. A new season is just around the corner, and you will feel better because you reached out.
Here are a few examples where it might be not only an appropriate thing to say but also a desperately needed one:
� To a child who is struggling to learn about how the world works and makes plenty of mistakes along the way. Whether seven years old or 17 years old, they need lots of �other chances� to show that they can overcome the obstacles and realities life throws at them.
� To children struggling through another school year, who need to be reminded that they always have another chance to earn better grades or make new friends. It might take special effort to help them accomplish this, but no child should ever be left with the impression that making low grades or having few friends is a permanent condition. The start of each new grading period creates �another chance� to wipe the slate clean from past grades and form new study habits and friendships.
� To a brother or sister (no matter what age), who, after all, is the blood relative you will have for the longest period of time (usually) in a life. Siblings often need another chance to work out a relationship with each other beyond that of when they were children together.
� To a friend who has done you some wrong, who needs another chance to feel welcomed back into your circle of warmth and friendship. Most often, the most basic of misunderstandings is at the heart of a wounded friendship anyway, and all that�s needed is another chance to talk about it.
� To a boyfriend or girlfriend who hurt your feelings but now more fully accepts and understands you and needs another chance to prove it. There�s so much to learn during a courtship, and so many opportunities to make a mistake. Two people learning how to love one another is perhaps the most difficult challenge in life.
� To a husband or wife who has made both lots of little mistakes and a few big ones over the years yet still keeps a flame burning for the love you shared through that time. Getting another chance can pave the way for a redefining of the relationship in the glow of true affection.
� Getting another chance is spiritual, not temporal, in nature, and therein lies its power to transform lives.
�You have another chance.� It�s powerful magic.###
(c) 2002 NewsSouth
Before you write off winter as a good idea gone bad, consider the following:
� Rare beauty. Before the bitter chill that chatters teeth and purloins electric power during and after an ice storm, I feel a child-like joy amidst the hoary frost that dresses trees and pastures in a mantle of silver.
There is a quiet, deep beauty to these scenes of winter that summons remembrances of times long ago and far away in a life that sometimes feels like someone else�s, I am so far removed from it now.
I cannot help but stare at the trees, limbs heavy with ice, bowing with due reverence to the lords of winter. Lords I also used to obey.
Those lords invited me outside as a child, pinking my cheeks as I played hard, �dancing� with nature, so to speak, and resisting with every ounce of my being the command to �come in out of the cold.�
What keeps mothers from understanding the pull playing in the cold has on children�s souls? The invitation to tango with Terpsichore is irresistible, and the reward sumptuous, as blood warmed by bold action makes one dizzy with the kind of joy unbeknownst to or long forgotten by most adults.
Parental fear is thin gruel when compared to the feast of robust rambunctiousness winter requires of those who would dance and sing with her, and children instinctively know this.
Don�t call your children in from the cold. Go outside and join them.
Find a way to enjoy any wisp of winter nature offers up in these southern climes; it is destined for a short life anyway, and God does not count against our allotted time those hours spent singing and dancing.
� Feast for the senses. Ever notice how smells and sounds and tastes and touches and sights seem more intense in the winter? Whether it�s the aroma of wood burning or the warmth generated there, few images of winter linger as does that of a fire, whether indoors or out.
This is a primal link, reaching back through antiquity to when a fire was the center of a community�s life, and often made survival possible. Who among us can resist staring at the yellow-orange-blue flames or red-black coals while pondering the deeper questions of life, acknowledging it�s all small stuff save for the quality of the relationships we build.
Kitchens are in all of their glory in the winter, being the place where family members gather both to conjure up and consume hearty soups, gumbos, roasts, vegetables, and sweets that nourish our bodies while telling stories that nourish our souls. Every bite tastes deliciously wonderful and the act of creating and sharing this food intensifies the love that we feel for each other and our way of life.
You also can smell neighbors� meals cooking and the scent of other fires burning somewhere in the neighborhood, and, if you�re lucky, you will be invited over to partake in good fellowship.
Cold air carries sound farther and clearer than does warm air because the air is denser; molecules are closer together. Hence you may hear singing or church bells or train whistles or children�s laughter that can�t be as easily heard in summer.
Hugs seem more affectionate, their natural warmth often magnified by the contrasting cold weather. Even a light touch to an arm or face seems more intense, because someone�s hand is often either much colder or warmer than we are, and the contrast heightens our awareness of being touched.
� Time spent together. Winter is the season we seek out those who mean most to us and make time to be in their company. Whether it was a special Thanksgiving effort to get together or going home for the Christmas holidays, we yearned for the familiar and cherished faces of loved ones smiling back at us.
All parts of these winter rituals give life its deepest meaning, when handled with passion, compassion, sincerity, and a positive perspective, no matter what. �All visitors give pleasure during the winter,� my grandmother Lillian used to quip. �Some in the coming, others in the going.�
May the rest of your winter be blessed with an abundance of affection, affiliation, and affluence, with wealth measured in terms of the love you create and the hope you create in the hearts of others. ###
(c)2002 NewsSouth
No wonder the debauchery of Mardi Gras comes just before the beginning of the Lenten season. The next day is Ash Wednesday, in some faiths the start of a 40-day period of self-denial sacrifice and reconciliation leading up to Easter.
It is my favorite season of the year, from a spiritual perspective. My grandmother Lillian loved it as well, and passed that feeling on to me by sheer example.
She taught me that giving up something for Lent (the usual practice) is fine. Any sacrifice is worth enduring if it�s for a higher, spiritual purpose. But she emphasized that doing something extra was even better, and wasn�t so negatively charged, as in �don�t eat this or that� or �don�t do this" and "don�t do that.�
She felt, as I do now through her living example, that it�s the extra positive things we do that make the most difference, not a reduction in the negative things we do, although both are worthy challenges. The former takes more imagination, initiative, creativity, and discipline. The latter merely cessation. Choose the former.
Lastly, Lent is a time of reconciliation, a time of coming back together. There are certainly people in your life worth reconciling with, so pray that you will be shown a way to do so. At the very least, reconciliation will require forgiveness, compassion, and acceptance.
Where that is at all possible in your life, make it so. ###
(c) 2002 NewsSouth
Why Easter did not evolve into a more cherished Christian holiday than Christmas I cannot fathom. Temporal (read that �money�) rather than spiritual reasons may lie at the heart of the matter.
Measured on every level save money, Easter is by far the celebration deserving more honor, attention, and participation in than Christmas by Christians everywhere. Consider:
� Birth vs. resurrection. C�mon, this is a no-brainer. I mean, being born is a significant event, don�t misunderstand me. I�m not suggesting that the birth of our Lord was just a blip on the radar screen of history, no sir. But that very human event is, you must admit, a common occurrence. You were born, I was born, all God�s children were born. Amen.
Now, about this resurrection thing. That�s really something to celebrate in a big way, wouldn't you agree? Just think about it in your own case. Which would you celebrate more, your birth or the day you came back to life after having died?
Even if you are more temporally oriented than spiritually, you must admit that the standard rule for value is rarity. The less of something there is, the more valuable it normally becomes. And you can�t get any more rare than one time in the history of the world. Jesus on Easter morning. That about wraps up all the resurrection stories from all time.
Concomitant with the idea of Jesus� resurrection is the obvious (at least it was made obvious to me by my grandmother Lillian) link to our own lives and the very real need to sort of �resurrect� ourselves every so often if we are to evolve beyond our own selfish habits and ways of doing things.
Grandma Lil would encourage all of us grandchildren to give up one bad habit and adopt a new, good habit as a challenge to our self-discipline. Could we do it?, she chided us. And yet, how many of us would really be quite content to have certain aspects of our lives �die away� and gladly resurrect to a new life if we had the chance?
Ah, but here�s the rub: We do have a chance to have this happen, but it�s just so difficult that we choose not to make the effort to kill off that smoking or drinking or overeating or TV or gotta-be-in-control, my-way-or-the-highway or any one of the dozens of modern life-sucking addictions and then replace those old habits with something more life-affirming.
Easter and the season of Lent that precedes it encourages just such �mini-deaths.� The Lenten custom is that you give up - let die away -something that you could and in many cases should let go of, and replace it with something more positive.
My venerable Uncle Mose had an even better way to get into the right frame of mind to make something happen along these lines. Whenever I was puzzled about something, he would pose this conundrum: Imagine that you were 100 years old and on your deathbed. God visits you and offers you this deal:
�I will send you back to when you were ___ (the age you are right now fits here).,� says God. �The only catch is that you will remember nothing that happened to you after this moment to which I send you back. �Now you will have the chance to live your life over - resurrect yourself in a sense - from that moment on.�
Would do take that deal? If you would, then start living your life as if you had just struck that bargain with God, because for all you know, you did strike such a bargain, Uncle Mose would cleverly suggest.
�Now�s your chance,� he would say, �to change those things you always wished you would have changed, to do all the things you wished you would have done. Don�t miss this chance!�
I was a teenager when Uncle Mose first posed that intriguing possibility to me, and, although it is admittedly a psychological sleight-of-mind self-trick, its implications are enormous if we take it to heart, which I did.
That simple exercise has guided me through many a moment of indecision in my life that I was struggling through, and continues to remind me that I can simply decide to live my life as if the changes I wanted to make were already in process, which any psychologist will tell you is a variation on the old "behavior often precedes belief� theme.
You know the theory that, if you behave in a polite manner for a long enough time, you will eventually acquire good manners, and the outside-in application of behavior will turn into an inside-out feeling (and habit) of being well-mannered. Hence you have �resurrected� yourself, killed off an old habit and replaced it with a new, positive one.
� Winter vs. Spring. Hoo-boy, another toughie, eh? NOT. Who but the most dyed-in-the-wool underwear Eskimo actually prefers winter to spring? Newly-sprouting flowers versus newly-sprouting flu bugs. Cold north winds versus warm southerly breezes. Sundown at 5 p.m. versus dusk at 8 p.m. or later. Winter the best of all possible seasons? I don�t think so.
So, how did Christmas evolve to outrank Easter in the hierarchy of Christian holidays (which is a word evolved from �holy days�)?
Money. The money-grubber-worshippers of the world saw a clear opportunity to cash in on what was intended as a time of spiritual celebration of the birth of our Lord.
Easter, on the other hand, was intended as a time of spiritual rebirth and renewal,acknowledging His resurrection as the seminal event in the history of the Christian faith.
Make your own resurrection just as eventful. And have a happy Holy Week: It�s the culmination of the most wonderful season of the year, spiritual or temporal, in my book.###
(c)2002 NewsSouth
As graduates everywhere take their first steps out into their brave new worlds, I am reminded of what Grandma Lillian always said: Asking the right questions is infinitely more important than knowing the �right� answers.
That�s because the so-called �right� answer can change, especially if you ask the right question. Example: In the late 1800�s, the right question was �How can I best try to save a person who has appeared to have drowned?� The accepted right answer at the time was �Roll them stomach-down over a barrel.�
More than a century later, that question still works. That�s because it was the right question. But notice how the answer has changed. Modern CPR techniques have made the barrel-rolling a laugh, yet it was regarded as the �right� answer at the time.
That example makes me shudder at all of the so-called �right� answers we think we know. That�s why graduates might think about some of the following questions as they venture out to manage their own lives in lieu of letting mom and dad do it.
� How can I strengthen my spiritual life?
� What�s most important to me? coupled with: How do I spend my time, money, and effort? The closer the answers to those two questions are to each other, the better.
� What are my goals and strategies for reaching them for the next 10 years? Five years? One year? Next month? Week? By the end of the day? Goals and strategies for reaching them work best as encouraging companions, not critical bullies. That means they have to reflect what you really want, not necessarily what someone else wants for you.
� What relationships in my life are worth cultivating and which are draining me? How can I show some extra loving attention to the former and how can I compassionately end the latter?
� How can I get by without buying this for one more hour, day, week, month, year (this question alone will save you lots of money)?
� What can I do for someone else today purely for their sake, even if I normally dislike doing this sort of thing ?
� How can I most creatively express a sincere Thank You or Congratulations to someone in my life who deserves it?
� Who can I encourage today with a bit of sincere praise?
� What small gift or gesture would a loved one really enjoy from me?
� What people in my life would enjoy a phone call or visit or letter from me this week?
� What could I eliminate from my daily diet just for this week (this will knock off several pounds if done regularly over a year)?
� What extra bit of exercise could I add to my routine just for today (ditto previous parenthetical thought)?
� What bad habit could I avoid just for today? What new habit might I try out just for today?
� What can I do that would improve communication between me and someone with whom I work or live or worship or share time?
Two of the best questions I know for clearing up communication problems are So what? and Specify?, though you must phrase them courteously to avoid stirring anger.
For instance, whenever someone makes a statement that seems not to matter all that much, ask them a variation of So What? This will test the relevance of whatever was said. If So What can�t be answered clearly, something�s amiss.
Same with "Specify?" Next time someone makes a claim about something, ask for examples. Once again, unless the answer makes sense, watch out.
Advertising claims make great targets. �Buy these shoes, or this car, or that beer because so-and-so famous person endorses it!� So What?, I say. Why should someone else�s choice dictate mine?
Or �It will change your life if you buy such-and-such.� Oh yeah, care to specify how? That answer better make sense, with plenty of believable examples.
My only cautionary note harkens back to my original illustration at the start of this column: Don�t be afraid or too proud to change your answers as you see fit, over time, to the enduring questions of our lives.
Change. Isn�t that what makes life so exciting and challenging and exquisitely delicious? Isn�t asking the right questions worth the struggle if you end up finding the answers that fit your life?###
(c)2002 NewsSouth
To students of all ages about to go back to school: you're in the midst of one of the most exciting times of your life right now. It�s a time filled with unlimited opportunity for you to be explorers and adventurers, if you will only summon your natural curiosity, show enthusiasm, act with respect, and take responsibility in your quest for knowledge.
The treasures you can find while on this adventure called "education" are many and varied, but the greatest prize is what you discover about yourself.
Because I have spent lots of time in schools, both as a student and as a teacher, I have formed my own theory on how to get the most out of this experience we call �education.� Here's what you need:
� Curiosity. This is the cornerstone of all quality education. Without curiosity, we are mere place-holders, whiling away the time, waiting to die.
With curiosity, all worlds open up to us for exploration and high adventure. We are all born with this wonderful trait. Just watch a child. The trick is not letting curiosity slip into idle curiosity. The difference is crucial, and the true student will follow those feelings of wonder - such as �I wonder why airplanes fly?� - with a willingness to work at solving the why. In the example used, studying the principles of aerodynamics as applied to flight is the response of a true student.
Letting the process stop (rather than start) with that curious question is the mark of a dilettante, someone whose claim of being a student is as shallow as their understanding of what the word "student" really means.
Curiosity can be taught, and once unleashed, is heuristic in nature: It motivates and leads to other learning experiences. Curiosity only kills stupid or lazy cats, not lively, smart ones who know that once curiosity is piqued, you get an urge to peek, then learning peaks.
� Respect. True students feel respect for themselves, their teachers, their classmates, and the subjects studied, and make the effort to consistently show it. Respect is born out of humility and the resulting realization that we all have much to learn, so let�s apply ourselves toward that end.
Respect for your subject of study comes when you accurately determine its power and importance and then give it the time and effort necessary to understand it. A lack of respect means you spend little time or effort trying to master the subject and shows you do not even realize how powerful and important education is. Lack of respect is what really kills you and a lot of other �cats,� not curiosity.
Basic manners are a good barometer of respect. If a student is polite, considerate of others, and optimistic, that indicates the presence of respect. A lack of respect is contagious, because it�s easier to be negative and selfish, and pathogens are lazy, always following the path of least resistance.
Successful explorers and adventurers respect their environment (the classroom and school), their guides (the teachers), their subjects, their fellow explorers (classmates), but most of all themselves.
� Responsibility. You are ultimately the only one responsible for your education. You will benefit from it. You will suffer for the lack of it. You will always wish you had more of it. Ask anyone now out of school.
No teacher, no parent, no friend, no subject can truly be held responsible for you not getting the most out of your education. Only you. A fierce determination deep in your heart and mind and soul will ultimately make the difference for you as you explore and discover, invent and create, stumble and recover your way, along this great adventure in life called education.
Take the responsibility.
� Knowledge. That�s what those other three of curiosity, respect, and responsibility can add up to, if applied with the zeal and discipline of an explorer. But knowledge is just the start. Applying knowledge with wisdom is the real goal of education.
When stumped by a particularly difficult challenge this year, just ask yourself: �What would an �A� student do in these circumstances?� If you don�t know that answer, ask a teacher. They�re hired to be good guides. And don�t be afraid to make mistakes.
My Uncle Mose Bernard - our family's greatest cheerleader for getting more education -once told me that it takes 5,000 mistakes to become educated. Get busy. ###
(c) 2002 NewsSouth
The fall festival season blew in on the latest cool front, and brought with it many fine memories, mainly of my Uncle Mose. He claimed there was something in the crisp air and chaotic scramble of activity at a fall festival that inspired some folks to become �sillymorphs,� and he was all for that, inasmuch as he was one of that ilk.
He believed evolving into a �sillymorph� - the word is from the Latin silliomorphus , �to undergo a change from the overly-serious nincompoop you usually are to the lighthearted, child-like, fun-loving nincompoop you should aspire to be� - greatly increases the chances that you will laugh more, love more, and live a more interesting, if not happier or longer, life.
Here are what Uncle Mose felt were the signs that you may be on the cusp of such a change:
� You act before you think. You find yourself pulled toward following your impulse to attend a festival, any festival, before you think about all the things others feel you should be doing instead.
� You choose instant gratification and rationalizations. You make up reasons why this particular festival is a must-go-to event. Keep in mind, your reasons may not be convincing or make sense to anyone but you. Then, you go.
� You enlist a co-conspirator. Not everyone can enjoy a festival with the unselfconscious abandon of a sillymorph, so you don�t bother asking those who are above such nonsense. Uncle Mose loved bringing children between six and 12 years of age (as a favorite nephew I was often asked to go) and those adults who felt as he did.
� You keep rules to a minimum, choosing just two. Safety. That�s the first and most important rule. No other rules appeal to you except this: smile at everyone as if you know them well and are really glad to see them.
� You make plenty of funny faces. You avoid under-reacting. When the kids get excited about something at the festival, your face tells all, and is uninhibited in its expression of allegiance with them.
� You eat something known to kill lab mice. You realize that festivals are no place to pretend you�re on a diet, so you eat with gusto.
� You eat a lab mouse. The ultimate in culinary delicacies, if properly prepared (just ask Chef Pat Mould, who's eaten a few).
� You make up songs and sing them with gusto. The sillier the better (even better if they relate to your time spent at the festival). And just who is this guy "Gusto" we keep planning to eat and drink and sing with, I once inquired of my Uncle Mose? He sounded like a fun guy. Mose just grinned.
� You try to win a stuffed animal for a child or your co-conspirator. Yeah yeah, the games at festivals are over-priced and rigged against you, so it's hard to win, but try anyway.
� You go on one of your companion's favorite amusement rides just because. Casting off fear or impending nausea, you give in when a child or companion implores you to go with them on a ride you would usually avoid.
� You throw up on them. There are consequences of being with a sillymorph, and your co-conspirators must accept them with gusto (that guy again).
� You buy a balloon and let it go, watching it as long as you can. If conditions allow, you might even give chase. I once caught up with such a balloon, miles away, after chasing it in a car and then on foot through a field. The resident bull did not appreciate this, but I retrieved that balloon.
� You do silly walks. Long before Monty Python had a Minister of Silly Walks, we had Uncle Mose urging us to do even the simplest things in a different way. Just for fun.
� At the end of your day at the festival, you find a deserving child (one being silly) and give her or him the rest of your unused tickets to rides.
Uncle Mose always talked about his favorite part of the festival on the way home and asked about ours. This was a wonderful way to fix the memories in our heads, having both lived through them and talked about them.
To those of you who are not and never will be on the verge of such silliness, take heart: we need you desperately to keep the lives of the sillymorphs in your family on track. They simply cannot manage on their own.
As for the sillymorphs themselves: yours is not to take heart, but rather give it. We all benefit from your generous spirit and example. ###
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