Q..How do you deal with the loneliness that sometimes accompanies panic disorder?
A.. I try to keep a good sense of humor, I have learned to laugh at myself(not always easy) if I didn't laugh I would always be crying and that is not much fun.

Q.. How has the medical profession helped you? Do you feel that they understand what you are going through?
A.. I dont believe they understand and they have done nothing to help.

Q.. Which part of the day do you find hardest to deal with..and why?
A..Morning is the most difficult, as soon as I wake I know if I will have a day that is anxiety free or if it will be a day of terror.

Q.. What is your attitude towards setback?
A.. Most of the time I handle it well, however, there are days when I feel sorry for myself.

Q..Do you pity yourself? If so, why?
A..Once in awhile I do pity myself. I try not to but it is difficult not to when you only feel well three out of seven days so it ocassionally gets the best of me.

Q.. What is your husband's/wife's attitude towards you?
A..My husband understands that everyone has difficulties in some area of their lives, although there are days when my dizziness is overwhelming and I stay in bed until it passes and then he has to do everything,and there are days that I cannot go to the market(happens alot) and he has to go.
He handles it well but i am sure he would like it if I was not so scared of being in the market.

Q..How old were you when you had your first panic attack and what do you think may have caused it?
A.. I was 21 and I believe it was from giving birth. My daughter was an infant and I haven't been the same since, and it became worse after my second daughter.

Q.. Do you feel stressed from the people around you. If so, why?
A..I do get stressed from people around me, I really am not sure why.

Q.. Do you feel inferior around others?
A.. I am not sure that I feel inferior but, I do wish that I could do normal everyday things like others.

Q.. At what age did you feel the most confident or proudest and why?
A..I will let you know when I reach that age.

Q..What,if any fears do you have concerning Y2K?
A..I cant believe it. This is one thing that doesn't scare me.

Q..How do you deal with the loneliness that sometimes accompanies panic disorder?
A.. I find great comfort in surfing the net these days but, before I discovered the world of the WWW I used to talk to a few of my friends who also suffered from these anxiety problems.

Q.. How has the medical profession helped you? Do you feel that they understand what you are going through?
A.. I received some excellent help and advice from a behavioural therapist after repeatedly going to my doctors begging for help. I needed to know whether I had a real anxiety problem or whether I was actually going mad. After being assessed by the therapist and finding out that after all those years of wondering what was wrong with me, I finally started to deal with my anxieties now that I knew what I was dealing with. I still feel that most doctors expect us to 'pull ourselves together' but, if you have the strength to persist, in the end you will get the help that you need in order to make a recovery.

Q.. Which part of the day do you find hardest to deal with..and why?
A.. Nightime........kids asleep, no partner, just me and my thoughts.

Q.. What is your attitude towards setback?
A.. I would say that I am 98% recovered from agoraphobia, but still am prone to G.A.D.. I think that I am a born worrier anyway. As for setbacks......I've had a few. I don't like them, but to my surprise, even if I stay in the house for a week or two, it gets to the point where I start to go out again without even realising that my life has started to get back to some sort of normality again. it's not until I'm at the 30th checkout of 55 at my local supermarket that it hits me and I have done very well to have come so far... AGAIN!!

Q..Do you pity yourself? If so, why?
A..Sometimes I do, but I believe that people who are lucky enough not to have experienced the horror of agoraphobia etc. also pity themselves at times too.

Q.. What is your husband's/wife's attitude towards you?
A..I was in a relationship when I was at my worst, and he was not at all supportive. I was a burden to him and in the end he left me to deal with it all with two children under the aged of 5. I still can't believe how far I have come.

Q..How old were you when you had your first panic attack and what do you think may have caused it?
A.. I was about 10 and it was when I got to the age when I realised that we don't live forever and I began to take note of the news about the destruction of mankind towards each other and our planet.(pretty deep thinking for 10 years old)

Q.. Do you feel stressed from the people around you. If so, why?
A.. Sometimes I tend to . I feel that certain people are waiting to see if I go back to the way that I was, instead of treating me like everyone else. It really stresses me when I being asked if I'm OK, which I find a bit amusing as thats something I used to complain about and expect from them when I was suffering.

Q.. Do you feel inferior around others?
A..I do around some people , but not all. I still question myself whether I am a good mum to my children. I find myself comparing myself to others.

Q.. At what age did you feel the most confident or proudest and why?
A..I felt very confident between the ages of 15-20 and I can't think why, maybe it was when I didn't have any responsibilities.

Q..What,if any fears do you have concerning Y2K?
A..I had fears that the world was going to end, but its now November 2000, so I guess I can stop worrying about that now.

Q..How do you deal with the loneliness that sometimes accompanies panic disorder?
A.. I read a lot and do crafts. I'm trying to get more social. It's hard work, but it is worth it.

Q.. How has the medical profession helped you? Do you feel that they understand what you are going through?
A.. Social Anxiety Disorder is one of the least recognized of the panic disorders. That is partly because we hide it so well. I was treated for depression and general panic by several therapists before I learned the difference. It really helps being aware of the real nature of the problem. I found some wonderful books that helped me help the therapist understand this particular disorder better.

Q.. Which part of the day do you find hardest to deal with..and why?
A.. It is hard to sleep, so I dislike late-nights. But that is also the time I can get most productive when I'm not depressed.

Q.. What is your attitude towards setback?
A.. I realize it is to be expected, but I get impatient with myself. I want to recover instantly from what it took years to develop.

Q..Do you pity yourself? If so, why?
A..I feel sorry for the missed opportunities this disease has robbed me of and I regret not learning how to cope earlier. I do not really pity myself, but I do have sad memories and regrets. I'm trying to "re-claim" some of those lost experiences.

Q.. What is your husband's/wife's attitude towards you?
A.. As with many people who have social anxiety disorder, I have not been fortunate enough to make romantic attachments.

Q..How old were you when you had your first panic attack and what do you think may have caused it?
A... I don't remember ever not having social anxiety attacks. From my research, I've learned that I was probably very shy as a child. When I became aware of others and sought their approval, anxiety began to develop

Q.. Do you feel stressed from the people around you. If so, why?
A.. The nature of social anxiety disorder is that I always worry about trying to please everyone. We all know that's not a realistic expectation, so I frustrate myself. The only time I'm not stressed around people is when I am with just one person I know well and feel accepted by.

Q.. Do you feel inferior around others?
A.. I am perfectionistic, which I also understand is typical of people with social anxiety disorder, so I often feel incapable when I talk with other people.

Q.. At what age did you feel the most confident or proudest and why?
A.. Because I am finally learning some coping techniques, I feel more confident now than I ever have before.

Q..What,if any fears do you have concerning Y2K?
A..Y2K...now that it has been 2000 for six months, I think we're going to do just fine with Y2K. (hee, hee)

Q..How do you deal with the loneliness that sometimes accompanies panic disorder?
A.. I allow myself to feel very sad and lonely for 10 to 15 minutes and maybe cry. Then, I think of other lonely people: elderly widows, people without spouses, children, or pets, people who can't financially afford to go places with their friends, other victims with this disorder, etc. I tell myself that they are surviving and so can I. Forcing myself to work on one of my many hobbies, making Christmas gifts to save money, starting home improvement projects, watching good movies on T.V (it's a good idea to have a supply of recorded video tapes) , reading engrossing novels, and gardening are some of my ways of distracting my mind.

Q.. How has the medical profession helped you? Do you feel that they understand what you are going through?
A.. Private support groups have helped me more than the medical profession. Members dealing with agoraphobia are in different stages and they certainly understand what I am going through. Helping others benefits me.

Q.. Which part of the day do you find hardest to deal with..and why?
A.. Definitely morning because I have the whole day ahead to worry about. After 8 o'clock in the evening, I'm relaxed because I've survived the day, visitors aren't likely to drop in, and I read or watch T.V.

Q.. What is your attitude towards setback?
A.. I hate them! They usually come when I least expect them and they seem to last forever. I know it is a time to regroup but I get discouraged.

Q..Do you pity yourself? If so, why?
A.. Yes, I pity myself. I brought up two children and missed taking them to the movies, to fairs, to McDonalds, roller skating, shopping for school clothes, seeing them in plays and in sports, missed college graduations.....the list goes on and on And at home I was so terrified that visitors would come and so preoccupied trying to figure out what was causing my agoraphobia and how to cure it, and so busy trying to appear "normal", that I wasn't able to fully enjoy them. I feel cheated and I feel my children were cheated. Yet, I am thankful for the good times and I know there are families that are a lot worse off. We have love.

Q.. What is your husband's/wife's attitude towards you?
A.. The first few years he'd get angry or try to make me feel guilty for not fulfilling my obligations. Then we went through years of his tolerating it. But now, he is understanding most of the time. It takes an awful lot of patience on his part but I guess he feels my company is worth it.

Q..How old were you when you had your first panic attack and what do you think may have caused it?
A.. I was 29. I think it was caused by stress, my inferior complex, family financial problems, a domineering husband and inadequate coping skills

Q.. Do you feel stressed from the people around you. If so, why?
A.. I used to feel stressed by all people except my family and my mother. But after many years of having this, I am able to identify intimidating people and to cope. The more I assert myself, the better I feel.

Q.. Do you feel inferior around others?
A.. Yes. I used to feel inferior around the majority of people. But now, I tell myself not to compare my weaknesses against their strengths. There are always going to be people better and worse than me in all phases of life. It helps to know that I am very special to my children, that I have some good friends, and that there are somethings I do good that not everybody can.

Q.. At what age did you feel the most confident or proudest and why?
A.. There have been twice in my life when I really felt good about myself. The years before I started school I was confident. I think it was because I, like most children, didn't compare people's houses, clothes, friends, toys, etc. We all just accept each other for who we were and there was no pretense. I also felt confident after I graduated from high school and was engaged. I think it was because earning money gave me a feeling of control and self worth. And being in love and being loved does wonders for the soul especially when there isn't a lot of responsibility attached.

Q..What,if any fears do you have concerning Y2K?
A.. I am concerned about Y2K but I'm not afraid. I plan to follow the suggestions to be prepared for at least a possible 2 weeks without many services. Therefore, I'm already saving containers for water and gradually stocking food. I feel it is better to be safe than sorry. If I don't need the water, it can be poured in the washing machine and the food will certainly get eaten up eventually. I feel fortunate that we have a wood stove for heating and that I can also cook on it. I am more worried for other people who don't have the options that I do. Also, I try not to think about military accidents that could occur world wide. There's nothing I can do about them. So, I'll say my prayers and trust in God.

Other comments......Your questionnaires are a wonderful idea. I learn a lot from them. Keep up the good work and thank you for all the time, energy and feeling you give to us.

Q..How do you deal with the loneliness that sometimes accompanies panic disorder?
A..I usually find something to do during the day when I'm alone and my family is at work and school. I find crosstiching to be very relaxing. I keep busy by cleaning house,walking to get the mail, reading my bible, and getting on the computer and last but not least, loving my pets.

Q.. How has the medical profession helped you? Do you feel that they understand what you are going through?
A.. My dr. is very kind and understanding but doesn't completely know all there is to know about pd/agoraphobia. He listens to me and is attentive, but just doesn't understand what to do for me other than give me medicine.

Q.. Which part of the day do you find hardest to deal with..and why?
A..Afternoons, because my blood sugar drops and it leaves me depleted of energy.

Q.. What is your attitude towards setback?
A..I don't like setbacks, but I have learned over this 3 years that with each setback, I come back stronger than before and am able to do more and think more positively about life.

Q..Do you pity yourself? If so, why?
A..Sometimes I start pitying myself because I remember how I used to be so productive with being able to drive myself anywhere at anytime and not think twice about it. But,when I start to feel that way, I start thinking that God is using this time to heal me so it changes my pity to thankfulness.

Q.. What is your husband's/wife's attitude towards you?
A..I'm single for now.

Q..How old were you when you had your first panic attack and what do you think may have caused it?
A..I'm not sure, but I think it was 1st grade being left on the steps of the school and the teachers wouldn't help me find my classroom. I ran up and down the sidewalk crying, feeling alone, and then after about 5 minutes, one of them finally helped me.

Q.. Do you feel stressed from the people around you. If so, why?
A.. I do feel a bit stressed from my niece sometimes. She pitches temper tantrums and it has me and my sister so nervous. She's almost 8 years old now and acts like she is 3 sometimes. We love her, but it is so nerve wracking to see her like she gets sometimes.

Q.. Do you feel inferior around others?
A..I hardly am around others, but when I am I do because of my weight gain.

Q.. At what age did you feel the most confident or proudest and why?
A.. I felt my most confident at age 24-25 when I lived with my cousin. I had a positive attitude and started feeling better about life. The reason was that I lived at a place near a lake where it was so pretty. That gave me a sense of security for some reason. I had also made some friends there and we would walk around the lake and at night we would rent movies to watch. When my home life felt right everything else did too.

Q..What,if any fears do you have concerning Y2K?
A..I think some things could happen like power outages and no water. Getting some supplies would be a good idea just in case. Otherwise, I trust God to take care of my emotional needs.

Q..How do you deal with the loneliness that sometimes accompanies panic disorder?
A..Surprisingly, I've always found ways to occupy myself. I have friends. I have hobbies. Lonliness is not a major problem; though it is a part of this.

Q.. How has the medical profession helped you? Do you feel that they understand what you are going through?
A.. Some are better than others. I will say that the "understanding" and the "medications" are light years of improvement from the 1970's when I first developed problems with panic.

Q.. Which part of the day do you find hardest to deal with..and why?
A..Usually when I first get up. If I feel bad when I first get up, I really have a hard time "righting my ship" as they say. I also have a let-down around mid afternoon but I cope with that by taking 15 minutes to just relax.

Q.. What is your attitude towards setback?
A..Unfortunately, they usually do a number on my confidence though I do think I've learned to rebound and crawl back out there sooner than I used to.

Q..Do you pity yourself? If so, why?
A..To some extent, YES! I feel I have a lot of intelligence and natural compassion that could be used more productively than this.

Q.. What is your husband's/wife's attitude towards you?
A..I'm single.

Q..How old were you when you had your first panic attack and what do you think may have caused it?
A.. I was 15. I had been sick with a stomach bug. I had never had anything like that and I think it triggered something in my confidence or such.

Q.. Do you feel stressed from the people around you. If so, why?
A..Yes, I tend to always think that I have either caused or contributed to other people's stress or anger. In my mind, I know that's not necessarily true.

Q.. Do you feel inferior around others?
A..Depends.

Q.. At what age did you feel the most confident or proudest and why?
A.. Well, I was pretty much fine up until 15. Also i worked for 14 years from age 18.

Q..What,if any fears do you have concerning Y2K?
A..I think i'll take minor, sane precautions. Maybe a few jugs of water; an extra bag of charcoal to cook on the grill; some extra food. That's about it. I've read articles that the Navy expects "most" cites to have some problems with gas, water & electric. I just don't think it'll be catastrophic. If it is , well, we won't have to worry, will we? LOL .

Q..How do you deal with the loneliness that sometimes accompanies panic disorder?
A..It is hard sometimes, but I have 3 wonderful kids and three grand children and a very supportive boyfriend. I spend alot of time with the grandchildren and babysit them during the week, so I keep busy and try not to think about the loneliness of it....somtimes it works....

Q.. How has the medical profession helped you? Do you feel that they understand what you are going through?
A.. I have found a few who have been okay and have tried to understand..I think it is hard for most to understand unless they have experienced it themselves...

Q.. Which part of the day do you find hardest to deal with..and why?
A..The mornings are the hardest for me especially if I am alone that day.I will start with the what ifs and tend to be more anxious in the mornings...

Q.. What is your attitude towards setback?
A.. I used to beat myself up alot over them, but try to tell myself it is okay and try to focus more on what I have accomplished and tell myself it is okay to have a setback, as long as I know I won't be there forever..

Q..Do you pity yourself? If so, why?
A..I have many a times. I try to have a better attitude about it and tell myself there is more to me than the panic disorder.....

Q.. What is your husband's/wife's attitude towards you?
A..My boyfriend is really great! ! ! He is very supportive, He knows I have some limitations and we work around them...He is wonderful.

Q..How old were you when you had your first panic attack and what do you think may have caused it?
A.. I was 16 and am now 41.....I am not really sure what triggered it......

Q.. Do you feel stressed from the people around you. If so, why?
A..? I don't really feel stressed from others, maybe uncomfortable around certain ones, i pretty much bring the stress on myself.

Q.. Do you feel inferior around others?
A.. Around some people I do, more so in the past , but I am trying to be more positive.

Q.. At what age did you feel the most confident or proudest and why?
A.. I think in my 20's I was most confident, after my 3 kids were born...I went through a bad marriage and after the divorce I got some of it back...I am working really hard to get my confidence back.....

Q..What,if any fears do you have concerning Y2K?
A..I really don't have any.......I think when it is a real problem I am good at finding ways to get along. I seem to stress more over little things.

Q..How do you deal with the loneliness that sometimes accompanies panic disorder?
A..I learned to cope with this as a child. Sometimes there is a certain peace in being alone. It is not so much loneliness, but the fact I have always been different than most people and have accepted the fact.

Q.. How has the medical profession helped you? Do you feel that they understand what you are going through?
A.. Most doctors had not a clue what was going on and were extremely hard to deal with. However I met my shrink ten years ago. She was so understanding an supportive she revived my faith in healers. Her other contribution to my well being is finding me other MD's who understood.

Q.. Which part of the day do you find hardest to deal with..and why?
A..The morning it is getting going and wondering what the day will bring is what often causes me to be down. Will it be a good day or a bad day.

Q.. What is your attitude towards setback?
A.. You pick yourself up and start all over again, usually with setbacks it can only get better.

Q..Do you pity yourself? If so, why?
A..No, I do not pity myself as this is a negative emotion and to deal with anxiety disorder you need a positive mental attitude.

Q.. What is your husband's/wife's attitude towards you?
A..My savior is my husband who had always there for me and he understands.

Q..How old were you when you had your first panic attack and what do you think may have caused it?
A.. I was four or five years old I was born with PAD as it is generational in my family.

Q.. Do you feel stressed from the people around you. If so, why?
A..I do not feel stress from the people around me, but often I get angry with the non family members who do not understand. The family all understands, if blood related they have the same problems.

Q.. Do you feel inferior around others?
A.. No, I feel equal to everyone, but this was drilled into me as a child.

Q.. At what age did you feel the most confident or proudest and why?
A.. Middle age. My kids were raised and doing well and life has been good to me. .

Q..What,if any fears do you have concerning Y2K?
A.. No, the world will still be here and so will PAD.

Q..How do you deal with the loneliness that sometimes accompanies panic disorder?
A..I email friends and play with my new dog.

Q.. How has the medical profession helped you? Do you feel that they understand what you are going through?
A.. Sometimes I wonder if they've helped or not. It's one step forward, 3 steps back most of the time for myself. But I am dealing with more than just panic disorder. I don't feel they understand unless they have experienced it themselves. They can only try to put themselves in our place with the descriptions we give them of what a panic attack feels like.

Q.. Which part of the day do you find hardest to deal with..and why?
A..2 p.m - 5 p.m. Have the mail answered and am usually lonely by then.

Q.. What is your attitude towards setback?
A..I've learned it's part of the process and part of life.

Q..Do you pity yourself? If so, why?
A..Sometimes. Don't feel anyone deserves a life filled with panic.

Q.. What is your husband's/wife's attitude towards you?
A..I honestly don't know what I'd do without my husband. He encourages me when I have setbacks and praises me when I have success. He never complains about all he has had to do for me over the past 8 years. I'm blessed!

Q..How old were you when you had your first panic attack and what do you think may have caused it?
A.. 15 - the only thing I can thing of is peer pressure and feeling I wasn't worthy of anything.

Q.. Do you feel stressed from the people around you. If so, why?
A..Sometimes. Husband has ADD and between the two of us, we are quite the pair. :-)

Q.. Do you feel inferior around others?
A..Most definitely.

Q.. At what age did you feel the most confident or proudest and why?
A..I think I was proudest at the age of 30 when I got married for the second time. I've never felt confident.

Q..What,if any fears do you have concerning Y2K?
A..Being without power and not having my computer to fill the loneliness.

Q..How do you deal with the loneliness that sometimes accompanies panic disorder?
A.. When I feel lonely I go for a walk or go shopping and watch other people and think to myself how many people go through the motions of life without even living. I am thankful and count my blessings. Sometimes I go to my grandparents grave and talk to my grandmother who I miss dearly. I tell her things because I know she is the only person who would not condemn me for what I feel inside my heart.

Q.. How has the medical profession helped you? Do you feel that they understand what you are going through?
A.. My doctor has helped me a great deal. He not only prescribed the right medication but he is very spiritual. I look at the people in the waiting room and I talk to them and they help me as well. It took me a long time to feel as good as I do now but a lot of the healing has come from within myself. I am more understanding, more compassionate, patient and more loving. I hate to say this but this disorder has made me who I am today and I really like the person I have become.

Q.. Which part of the day do you find hardest to deal with..and why?
A..The hardest part of the day is when I go to bed. I still have at times a hard time trying to go to sleep. Usually this occurs on Sundays when I have to get up the next day and go to work. I feel very lonely (I am a single parent) and think that I won't be able to sleep or I will never find someone who will understand what I went through and love me.

Q.. What is your attitude towards setback?
A..I don't let it get me down because I know everyone has good days and bad days.

Q..Do you pity yourself? If so, why?
A..No, I don't pity myself but actually believe this disorder has helped me see things differently. I wish and pray that my sister would stop living in the past and choose to stop blaming my parents for her misfortunes.

Q.. What is your husband's/wife's attitude towards you?
A..N/A I am a single parent who is currently not seeing anyone.

Q..How old were you when you had your first panic attack and what do you think may have caused it?
A.. I had my first panic attack when I was 28. I knew something was wrong with me prior to my first attack. I was withdrawn and depressed. I feel my abusive childhood and unhappy marriage triggered my attack.

Q.. Do you feel stressed from the people around you. If so, why?
A..No, I try not to let other people bring me down but sometimes they do. The people that I love the most...my family...especially my sister.

Q.. Do you feel inferior around others?
A. Sometimes...usually when I have PMS.

Q.. At what age did you feel the most confident or proudest and why?
A..I would have to say the present. After going through depression and anxiety a divorce and custody battle, I came out of it with a healthy attitude. I sometimes don't know how I got through it all but I did. I like who I have become and feel good more than I feel bad. I feel happy. I never felt this good in all my life.

Q..How do you deal with the loneliness that sometimes accompanies panic disorder?
A.. I don't really feel that lonely anymore,but when I do I'll listen to some music,watch t.v.,talk to a friend,have my husband hold me,pray or go somewhere that I enjoy.

Q.. How has the medical profession helped you? Do you feel that they understand what you are going through?
A.. I'm seeing a Physchiatrist and a Phsychologist and I know my Phsychologist understands what I'm going through because he's had panic attacks himself

Q.. Which part of the day do you find hardest to deal with..and why?
A..Usually nights are harder for me because I feel more nervous and scared and succeptible to panic.Also my husband works nights so that makes me feel bad when he's gone.

Q.. What is your attitude towards setback?
A..I deal with setbacks by thinking of them as temporary and not permanent.

Q..Do you pity yourself? If so, why?
A..I used to feel sorry for myself when I had a low self esteem,but now I'm happier and I feel better about myself so I don't feel sorry. I also try to think of others who are worse off than I and then I realize how lucky I am.

Q.. What is your husband's/wife's attitude towards you?
A.. My husband loves me very much and he's very supportive of me and helps me through all my tough times.

Q..How old were you when you had your first panic attack and what do you think may have caused it?
A.. I was 11 yrs.old when I had my 1st panic attack and I think I had it because I had a lot of things building up inside me secrets and things I was trying to hide so when I had the flu and got sick in front of a group of people that's when I had my 1st panic attack and I've been having them ever since.

Q.. Do you feel stressed from the people around you. If so, why?
A..I do feel stressed from my mom sometimes because of the way she acts. She can be very annoying and stubborn which makes me mad and anxious. My dad just is okay he justs tries to push me sometimes to do things I don't feel comfortable doing.

Q.. Do you feel inferior around others?
A..Yes I feel very self conscious and inferior around others.

Q.. At what age did you feel the most confident or proudest and why?
A..I'd have to say on my wedding day I felt the most confident and proudest because I felt so special and loved. I thought I would be nervous but when I looked around and saw all the people there who loved my husband & I it gave me confidence and took away my anxiety.It was ironic because my husband was more nervous than I and he doesn't have any panic problems.

Q..What,if any fears do you have concerning Y2K?
A.. I'm a little nervous because it's the fear of the unknown.I do fear it but I'm trying not to think about it to much because it will just make me scared and I have to have faith in God that things will be alright.

Q..How do you deal with the loneliness that sometimes accompanies panic disorder?
A.. There is a loneliness about this disorder as I am sure everyone has experienced it. I experience the loneliness the most at night when everyone is asleep and I can't because of anxiety. The best way I deal with it is to try to get my mind off of it.

Q.. How has the medical profession helped you? Do you feel that they understand what you are going through?
A.. The medical prefession has helped me by giving me the medicine that works for me but I do not think they understand what I am going through at all.

Q.. Which part of the day do you find hardest to deal with..and why?
A..Morning, my anxiety is the highest in the morning time.

Q.. What is your attitude towards setback?
A..I think setbacks suck but I know that you can overcome them and to be patient and that it takes time.

Q..Do you pity yourself? If so, why?
A..Yes I do sometimes pity myself. I see other women doing things that I want to be able to do but can't because of the phobias I have.

Q.. What is your husband's/wife's attitude towards you?
A.. My husband is very supportive of me more so now that he has experienced severe anxiety.

Q..How old were you when you had your first panic attack and what do you think may have caused it?
A.. 20, Mitra Valve Prolapse, having a new baby after only being married for ten months, trying to work and take care of a baby and my boss being mean, very mean:O) I think alot of this contributed to my first panic attack. I remember feeling so nervous at first and its like it just kept building and building up in me to finally wham was at the movies watching a scary movie(which I am sure didn't help) and I had one and then the trip to the ER was no fun either especially when the doctor on call said I need to see a psycharist so I came out there feeling like I was nutty.

Q.. Do you feel stressed from the people around you. If so, why?
A.. Sometimes, if I am having a bad day with anxiety then I am more sensitive.

Q.. Do you feel inferior around others?
A..Oh god yes. I feel so small sometimes.

Q.. At what age did you feel the most confident or proudest and why?
A..18, was young and no worries.

Q..What,if any fears do you have concerning Y2K?
A.. I really don't worry about Y2K. I know that there are going to be problems but I know the problems can be fixed. I do believe that the internet will shut down but if it does I am sure that they will have it up and going in a few weeks. I do worry about banking problems and like many others I am planning on not having much in my checking account. I think the worries about Y2K will effect our econmy very much. The banks might go broke for a few weeks but like I said things will be fixed. And the problems that might arise from Y2K will be taken care of in time.

Q..How do you deal with the loneliness that sometimes accompanies panic disorder?
A.. Dealing with the loneliness is a really hard part of this, so many of my friends work, or have stopped asking me to do things because of constant refusals. Since I got my computer for Christmas I have made one special friend, who is always there for me, yes I met her on your pen pal page and although she lives in Florida and I in New Brunswick I never feel alone anymore. I know that this one person will be there for me and understand exactly what I am going through. We have formed a bond greater than anyone I have met face to face, not only on the panic disorder but on a real best friend level, we write and talk about many things and since I found Jen I know I will never be lonely again..

Q.. How has the medical profession helped you? Do you feel that they understand what you are going through?
A.. The medical profession as done in my opinion absolutely nothing for me.. they have been telling me for years thatit is just my nerves but never once attempted to find out why, I feel let down by the medical field and have found more help and understanding on the internet and through Eileen's Panic Page than was ever offered by a so called medical professional.

Q.. Which part of the day do you find hardest to deal with..and why?
A..The hardest part of the day for me is the morning, I have a hard time getting started in the morning and find myself apprehensive at times, usually takes me about an hour to get it together, as to why, your guess is as good as mine. Could be knowing you are going to be alone all day or that you can't get in the car and drive somewhere..

Q.. What is your attitude towards setback?
A.. Setbacks are just that setbacks, if today is not going good then tomorrow will have to be better. I give myself praise for the accomplishments no matter how small, and I give myself reassurance when it just doesn't go the way I expected. I just take one day at a time and try to think as positively as I can.

Q..Do you pity yourself? If so, why?
A..I used to but have learned to accept myself for who I am , warts and all. I found it didn't do me any good to dwell on self pity .

Q.. What is your husband's/wife's attitude towards you?
A.. I am blessed with the most wonderful understanding husband, he has been living with this for 31 years and seen me through good and bad times, yes there are good times. He praises me for the smallest accomplishment, he knows how hard I struggle in certain situations and is always there with love and support. His attitude never changes toward me whether I am having a good day or bad day he is there for me.

Q..How old were you when you had your first panic attack and what do you think may have caused it?
A.. I was just 6 years old when I had my first panic attack, I guess it was that I didn't want to go to school,thinking back I think I had separation anxiety about leaving my mother, I was shy and introverted even as a child.

Q.. Do you feel stressed from the people around you. If so, why?
A..Sometimes I feel stressed when I am around people who I know would not understand Panic/Anxiety and look at me like I had 2 heads if I told them.

Q.. Do you feel inferior around others?
A..I feel inferior to some people, mainly because they can do things without thinking about it, they take for granted driving the car or going to work as just an every day occurrance where I think of it as an accomplishment.

Q.. At what age did you feel the most confident or proudest and why?
A..I felt the most confident and proud at the age of 33, why..because I had lost a lot of weight, was working and bought my own car and was feeling like I was normal. Self esteem has a lot to do with panic as I am learning to like myself more the less the panic is effecting me.

Q..What,if any fears do you have concerning Y2K?
A.. I really don't have any fears concerning Y2K other than not being able to use my computer to stay in contact with my best friend in Florida.

Other comments... I have been constantly growing the last few months and doing more and more things that I was unable to do before. I have driven the car, not too far mind you, I have been shopping and gone into stores alone and have been feeling more confident about myself than I have in years. I have been gaining self esteem and I think it has given me the key to progress and to accept myself for who I am. I would like to thank Eileen for having her panic page and giving me the opportunity to learn and grow, knowledge is power and you have given us all the power, and a special thanks for sending me Jen, my best friend who I would never have met if not for your site..Thank you and keep up the good work..




If you would like to respond to the questionnaire, send me an email and I will forward you a copy.