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"Now I Know" part 1/?
by: Laheara
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TITLE: Now I Know 1/?, this is going to be a LONG story.
AUTHOR: Laheara, [email protected]
ARCHIVE: My homepage, anywhere you want just tell me
ERA: "Jedi Apprentice" period, Obi_Wan is 13
RATING: PG (no bad language, mild violence, no sex)
SPOILERS: Refers to all 3 books in "Jedi Apprentice"
SUMMARY: Obi-Wan's second official mission with Qui-Gon, and returning to the Temple as a Padawan. Bonding between Qui-Gon and Obi-Wan.
FEEDBACK: YES, please.
DISCLAIMER: I don't own the SW characters (i.e.: Qui-Gon and Obi-Wan) George does. But I do own everyone else they meet.
"You seem nervous Obi-Wan, is something wrong?" Hearing his masters voice Obi-Wan looked up from playing with his sleeve to see Qui-Gon watching him.
"No, it’s nothing," he replied but Qui-Gon didn’t look convinced. "Well maybe it is something, I’m not sure, I just feel strange. This is the first time I’ve been back to the Temple since you took me as your Padawan. The first time I’ll see my friend as one and not a cadet. I don’t know how I’ll react to seeing them and the Temple again, and I’m not sure how they’ll react to me." He returned to playing with a loose thread on his sleeve. He felt better having something to occupy his mind with even if it wasn’t really working.
Qui-Gon remembered feeling that way on his first return trip to the Temple. He felt like things would be so different between he and his friends, and they would all feel uncomfortable; fortunately, he was pleasantly proved wrong. His friends were as happy to see him as he was to see them. "I remember feeling like that to. I worried all the way back to Coruscant and when my master and I entered the Temple everything was as it was when I left it. My friends were happy to see me, we were as if nothing had changed. I’m sure it will be the same for you. I do know for sure that all of your close friends are still there, and Bant is looking forward to seeing you."
Obi-Wan perked right up at the mention of her name. She was one of his closest friends. He remembers swimming with her at night in the river behind the Temple. The water turned the same color as her eyes, and she could swim like a fish. He wouldn’t mind a swim right now, it was a great memory. He was beginning to look forward to returning to the Temple. "Maybe this won’t be so bad then. Will we report to the counsel first?"
"Yes, Yoda is expecting us. The report will be short and then I will arrange time for you to find your friends. Your old room is still free if you would like to stay there while we’re visiting." Qui-Gon knew what the answer would be to that question. Obi-Wan’s room was in the middle of all of friends’, so they came together there.
"Yes, I would like to go back there." He was thinking about all the stories to tell his friends. The adventures aboard the Monument, the mines on Bandomeer, the trouble on Gala and Phindar, and several less exciting ones lately.
"We’re on final approach to the Temple now sir." the pilot of their red and white diplomatic vessel reported to Qui-Gon.
"Thank you captain. We’ll be ready," Qui-Gon answered politely.
Obi-Wan stood up and walked over to the window. He always loved to watch his ship getting closer and closer to the spires of the Temple. Watching it get bigger and bigger. The ancient rule that nothing on Coruscant could be taller then the Temple always pleased him. It made his home look very grand and huge, not that it wasn’t big enough already.
He remembered his first piloting session. He was so scared he would run the shuttle into an air bus or a building that he almost refused to take the controls. When he did he felt so comfortable that he rose to be one of the best pilots in his age group. He’d flown several things on Coruscant, and now a huge mining transport and a royal liner.
"We’ll be landing at the Temple momentarily, are you ready?" Qui-Gon saw that his student was deep in thought and didn’t really expect an answer right away. He understood by remembering all the things that were going through his head his first visit home. He reached out and tapped Obi-Wan on the shoulder to get his attention.
Obi-Wan had been so deep in remembering and watching the Temple he didn’t realized his master was standing right behind him. "Yes, I’m ready, sorry."
"You’ll have 3 days to admire the Temple, now we have to meet with Master Yoda," he directed Obi-Wan to the exit ramp, "Come now."
* * * * * *
They walked into the corridor several levels above where his friends would be in training drills right now. Obi-Wan didn’t even notice Qui-Gon was watching him. Qui-Gon saw the boy noting everything is sight remembering his past life here.
It was one of the things he liked about his new Padawan, the way he never missed a thing and his memories were so important to him. He was also glad that Obi-Wan still remembered all of this after what had almost happened to him on Phindar a few weeks ago. That experience had really driven home just what this new Padawan meant to him. He remembered being so angry when he first heard what happened at Syndicate headquarters, then the very strong feeling of loss and sorrow. It was happening again. We was letting himself become attached to another student. It will go well this time because he could feel the overwhelming good in Obi-Wan, this student won’t turn.
Obi-Wan stopped suddenly and was standing beside a small scratch in the pattern on the wall. "I made that scratch. Bant and Reeft and I were playing a game, Bant and I cornered Reeft against the wall. He had stolen our desserts at dinner and we went after him during free time that night as a joke. We were about to charge him and mess up his hair when Yoda walked by. I was holding a fork and fell against the wall as Yoda surprised us. The fork ran against the rock and made this scratch but I didn’t notice it right away."
Qui-Gon smiled, it was the kind of prank that he would have played on one of his friends at the Temple. "How did Yoda take you scratching our Temple walls?"
"He didn’t notice right away, Bant helped me get back on my feet and he asked us what we were doing up here," Obi-Wan smiled and blushed a little. "We hadn’t realized where we were, we looked around an realized we were on the level below the spires which was off limits to students. He smiled and looked at us with those sleepy eyes then told us to go back down below and he wouldn’t tell our other instructors but to remember not to come here again."
Qui-Gon looked at the scratch and nodding toward it asked, "What about the wall?"
"When we thanked him and started to leave we noticed the scratch. He had already started to walk away but when we didn’t follow him he came back and asked us why we hadn’t left yet and I looked at the wall and the fork in my hand with blue dust from the wall. We thought he would change his mind and we’d all be in trouble, but he just looked at it and said, ‘Remember this you will, that even pranks can cause damage or worse. Be more careful you must,’ then he robbed one finger over it and stood up saying, ‘it gives the corridor a little character you think?" Obi-Wan robbed the scratch the same way Yoda had, it was less noticeable now as it was then. He always thought that it was funny Yoda let them get away with that, but now he understood that sometimes it is better to let someone deal with a mistake themselves.
"That sounds like something he would do. With him everyone gets one chance to do something foolish and be forgiven," Qui-Gon said with small laugh.
"Yes, always an important thing, forgiveness is," Yoda said from behind them. They both turned quickly to greet the Jedi Master and leader of the counsel. "Report to the counsel you were supposed to ten minutes ago." They had both lost track of the time during this little story. Yoda looked at them sternly at first then his expression softened and he said with a smile, "Report to us now I hope you will."
"Yes, master," Qui-Gon and Obi-Wan said together quickly.
"I apologize for this Master Yoda, I stopped Qui-Gon to tell him a story, he was just humoring me," Obi-Wan noted in his Masters defense.
"In trouble you are not, remember the day you spoke of I do; a good memory to have resurfaced," the small master smiled looking Obi-Wan over from head to toe. "Knew I that one day a fine young man you would be become, correct was I Master Qui-Gon?"
Qui-Gon looked at Obi-Wan thoughtfully and replied, "Very correct my Master. He has become a fine young man."
Obi-Wan looked up at his new master and smiled inside and out. In all their time together Qui-Gon had never actually said how he felt toward his new Padawan; now that he had Obi-Wan felt very satisfied. As they followed Yoda down the corridor to the lift up to the counsel chambers Obi-Wan leaned closer to Qui-Gon and whispered, "Thank you for saying that Master."
Qui-Gon leaned down closer to Obi-Wan and said in response, "You’re welcome, and I meant what I said. We’ll talk about this again later."
& & & & & &
Qui-Gon was right, reporting to the counsel hadn’t taken long at all and now Obi-Wan was free for the rest of the night to find his friends. Afternoon drills were over now and free time would be starting soon. This was he and his friends’ favorite time of the afternoon, it was when they’d get together and have fun.
Obi-Wan walked by the training room and saw Bant and Reeft inside putting away their weapons. They looked the same as when he’d left a couple of months ago. They were starting toward the door talking about something. Obi-Wan ducked into the evening shadow on the outside of the door and waited. He heard their voices coming closer, then as Bant came through he flew out and picked her up around her small waist making sure not to squeeze to tightly.
Bant squealed and looked behind to see her old friend. Then she yelled, "Put me down Obi-Wan!"
As soon as he did she wheeled around and hit him in the upper arm half-heartedly. Then she and Reeft gave their friend a long bear hug and everyone laughed. When they parted Bant looked Obi-Wan over and remarked, "You look great!"
"So do you both, it’s so wonderful to be back here with again. I really missed you guys," he said with a big smile. And he really had, they were his whole family and loosing them and the Temple all at once hit him harder then he’d thought it would.
"It’s great to see you again, and we missed you to Obi-Wan. How have you been? I your new master treating well? What’s it like to have a master? Is it everything we thought it would be? How did your birthday go, we had a little ceremony ourselves for you, you know? Have you seen much excitement? How long are you back for?" Reeft couldn’t shut himself up, he had a million questions to ask and wanted to know how long he had to ask them.
"Slow down Reeft, give Obi-Wan time to think. That last one I do want to know myself, how long are you back for?" she asked with concern in her eyes. She hoped it would long enough for them to get caught up and exchange stories.
"Qui-Gon said I’m here for 3 days if everything goes according to schedule, which he thinks it should," Obi-Wan replied hoping that was enough time.
"That’s great we can talk about everything, and do some with you while you’re here," she said with a big smile, already planning his next three days herself.
"So, big question, when do we get to meet to Qui-Gon. I’ve heard so much about him since the news got out that he took you after all. What’s he like?"
Reeft was doing it again, asking a million question a minute, but Obi-Wan didn’t mind he was glad to back with his friends. "I guess you can meet whenever you want to, and yes he is a great teacher. We’re getting along very well, I think?"
"What does that mean?" Bant asked.
"Well Qui-Gon isn’t that easy to read, I’ve known him now for a few weeks and I’m still lost to figure him out. I’m not sure I’ll ever know him really well, he keeps very much to himself. But he’s been a really great friend so far," Obi-Wan answered them. He knew he should explain, but they knew he didn’t want to.
It was true, Qui-Gon didn’t talk much about himself. That story on the ship back here this morning was the first time other then the river rock story that Qui-Gon had told Obi-Wan anything about his past. He was glad that his new master was starting to open up to him, especially knowing how hard it for him considering Xanatos.
Suddenly Obi-Wan’s comlink activated, it was Qui-Gon, "Obi-Wan."
"Yes, Master," Obi-Wan answered right away.
"Sorry to interupt your remenising, but Yoda needs to talk to the two of us about our next mission. Can you come back up to the Counsel Chambers?" Qui-Gon asked obviously knowing the answer, there was no way his student would say no.
"Yes Master, I’ll be right there," he relied to his teacher. He looked at his friends, and frowned, "Sorry guys gotta go, but I shouldn’t take long or Qui-Gon would have said so."
"That’s OK, you’re a Padawan now, you have to answer to your master at all times. We know the drill, and hopefully we’ll have the chance someday to," Bant reminded her old good friend.
"Anyway, I’ve got my old room back while I’m visiting, so you know where to find me. I’ll call you when I’m done and we can meet there," Obi-Wan informed his friends.
"That’s convenient," Reeft noted.
"I thought apprentice’s always stayed with their masters, how did you swing that?" Bant asked curiously and a little concerned, "Is he mad at you for something?"
"No, no, he just knows that I really want to be with my friends and we’ve got years to share rooms together so he asked Yoda for me and told me on the ship coming here this morning," Obi-Wan informed his worried friend.
But he didn’t think of that. He hadn’t thought anything of it, just took it a face value this morning. He had noticed Qui-Gon gave a little sign when he answered he would rather stay in the student rooms to be with his friends. . Now he was worried, had he failed some kind of test with his master?
* * * * * * *
Qui-Gon had gone to the map room after reporting to the counsel with Obi-Wan. He always liked this room, there was so much knowledge contained here, that was your to learn if you made the right choice of what planet to ask it from.
Since he had asked Obi-Wan about staying in his old room he had been reoccupied. It was a classic test master gave their students. The student must look inside themselves and decide which they would rather, their new master or their tried and true friends. The students who choose their masters are the ones who the master has made feel comfortable and welcome. Most students choose their friends, because they know how to react to friends and don’t have to worry about friends seeming mean.
Obi-Wan choose his friends, and now Qui-Gon looked back at the last couple of months at how he has treated the boy. Qui-Gon was rude and uncaring toward him aboard the Monument and for a while after, even when they arrived on Bandomeer. He hadn’t given Obi-Wan his trust because he was still over shadowed by his experience with Xanatos. But Obi-Wan knew that, it was all explained, and recently on Phindar they had worked together well. But, he did criticize his friendship with Guerra, and didn’t explain why he had decided to help the Derida brothers.
Qui-Gon realized he hadn’t been the caring mentor he should have been. Of course Obi-Wan chose to be with his friends here, he knew he had the next several years to be stuck with his new uncaring master. Now knowing how the boy felt toward him felt strange. He hadn’t realized how much Obi-Wan decision had hurt him, even thought he understood now why it was made. Would he ever be able to gain his new Padawan’s trust and respect?
"Troubled you seem Qui-Gon," Yoda said from behind him in the darkness. "Obi-Wan chose badly I see."
"No master, he chose wisely, I chose badly," Qui-Gon felt as thought he were losing an apprentice all over again. "I haven’t been the master to him I should have been, I haven’t given him trust. There is no reason he should wish to stay with me when his true friends are only a level away who accept him."
"See I that this boy does care for you Qui-Gon, time you must give him to realize it himself," Yoda moved closer and sat next to Qui-Gon, "Stay with your new master you did not either as I remember."
It was true, but he and his master had a disagreement the day before returning to the Temple. He and Obi-Wan had no such problem. "I feel as though I’m pushing Obi-Wan away again. But by the time I realize it the damage has already been done. I don’t want to alienate him like I did before on the Monument, but keep doing it."
"How did his birthday go," the small Master asked?
"It was the day before we had the trouble on Phindar, I admonished him for not following the tradition of reflection. Then when I tough I had lost him, I wanted to take that back more then anything," Qui-Gon remember how his heart fell when Duenna told him what happened, and then how he felt seeing Obi-Wan again coming off Prince Beju’s ship. Still he had not told the boy how he felt.
"Think you Obi-Wan does not know your feelings for him?" Yoda asked in his you know what to do tone.
"I honestly don’t know what he thinks of me," Qui-Gon admitted.
"Then ask him you must," Yoda stated, "after I have told you what his to be your next mission, you will talk to your new apprentice."
Qui-Gon asked surprised, "The new mission is ready now?"
"Yes, has been waiting for you both," Yoda replied, "Problem this is?"
"I told Obi-Wan he would have a couple of days to spent with his friends," Qui-Gon said.
"Require the 2 of you the mission does not, leave him here you may," Yoda offered.
Qui-Gon thought about that. Would it be better to leave him here and keep his promise? Or would Obi-Wan feel left out again should Qui-Gon leave him behind. "I will tell him to meet me in the chambers for our new mission report."
"Decided you have not," Yoda noted as he left.
He reached for his comlink and activated it, "Obi-Wan."
* * * * *
In the counsel chambers for the second time in one day. This was unusual. He noticed Qui-Gon seemed uneasy throughout the meeting. When it was over he noticed Yoda watching him too. Now he was sure, that must have been a test this morning and he chose the wrong answer.
"Obi-Wan," Qui-Gon waver for him to join his master on the balcony, "before you rejoin your friends there is something I need to speak with you about."
Obi-Wan looked at Qui-Gon with a worried expression, "I know, that was a test this morning wasn’t it? About staying with my friends or you."
Qui-Gon was impressed Obi-Wan had figured it out so soon, "Yes it was."
"I know I made the wrong choice, I’m sorry, I won’t stay there if you don’t want me to." Obi-Wan wanted to make this right, he didn’t want to hurt his master.
"The reason the question is asked when it is is to make you go with your instincts. It is as much a test for you as for me. It shows me I haven’t treated like I should have, I haven’t earned your trust. Which is why is you would want to be with your friends who do take you as you are," as Qui-Gon explained the test he saw Obi-Wan shaking his head in disagreement. He admire that about Obi-Wan, the way he would never intentionally hurt anyone’s feelings.
"No, that’s not true. I wasn’t paying attention when you asked me, I was thinking about the things I used to do with them. I know that’s not the person that you are going to make me," Obi-Wan knew what he was saying didn’t make much sense, but he was very uncomfortable.
Qui-Gon looked at him and thought for a moment, "It is not the job of a Master to change a Padawan, but to improve on what is already there. I don’t wish to change you, you have many good qualities. I want to teach you to use them to their extent."
"This coming out the way I want it to. I don’t want you to be angry Master," his Apprentice was noticeable hurt by this line of questioning. He should just move on the mission suggestion Yoda made.
"I can see that I have hurt you, I’m sorry Obi-Wan," Qui-Gon apologized, "but what I want to talk to you about is the mission. I said you would have a few days with your friends, but this mission leaves tonight."
"I’ll be ready," Obi-Wan responded quickly.
"Yoda suggested that you may want to stay here. It is not necessary for us both to go, I can handle it alone."
Now Obi-Wan was on the spot again. Should he go or stay, he made the wrong choice before, he didn’t want to again. "Do you want me to stay," he asked?
"It is your decision, this is not a test. I said you had 3 days with your friends."
So that was it, he was trying to keep his promise. It would be nice to spend time with Bant and Reeft, but they said he was a Padawan now. He had to follow his maser, "I want to go."
Good, this would give them time to talk. He made sure not to show his relief but answered, "Very well, we leave in 10 hours. You have until then to be with your friends. I will meet you at the ship in 10 hours."
"Yes Master," he wanted to ask but wasn’t sure how to bring it up. Very shyly he whispered to himself, "Ask him you coward."
Qui-Gon saw there was more in Obi-Wan’s face, "Ask me what?"
Obi-Wan hadn’t thought he said it loud enough to be heard, then he remembered, all Jedi Knights have excellent senses. He asked without looking up, "Bant and Reeft would really like to meet you. I said I would ask."
"I see," Qui-Gon said quietly.
Obi-Wan could see that it wasn’t going to happened, "I’m sorry, I shouldn’t asked. You have more important things to do with your time. I’ll leave you alone." He stared to walk toward the lift embarrassed.
Qui-Gon could see the ashamed look on his student’s face. He wasn’t pushing him away again, "Obi-Wan wait!" The boy stopped and turned to meet his Master coming toward him, "I would be happy to meet your friends."
Obi-Wan perked right up, a broad smile came across his face and that sparkle that Qui-Gon enjoyed was back in his eyes. "Really? I mean great. When are you free?"
"Now if that is convenient for you," Qui-Gon said smiling.
"Yes, it’s perfect. They’re waiting for me at the river by now, it’s tradition for us." Obi-Wan was very excited. You could have cut through the tension on that balcony with a lightsaber. It felt good to get some happiness into the air between them.
* * * * *
Bant and Reeft were at the river like Obi-Wan said they would be. When he stepped out, they began to move toward him all smiles, but then they saw Qui-Gon. It is customary for students to act differently around Masters then with their friends. They stood waiting for the two to approach them.
"Hi guys, you said you wanted to meet him, so here he is," Obi-Wan looked at his friends and noted, "you can breath you know, he won’t bit you."
His friends went to laugh, but looked to the Master for permission. Qui-Gon nodded and smiled saying, "It’s alright, I think we can dispense with formality this time. Just relax."
They immediately relaxed and smiled at their friend and waited for introductions. Obi-Wan was glad that the air here was also a little more easy. "Bant and Reeft, this is my master Qui-Gon Jinn, master, Bant and Reeft."
He shook hands with both students, "A pleasure to meet you both finally. Obi-Wan speaks highly of you."
Bant blushed, "He spoke very highly of you this afternoon too."
Qui-Gon looked at Obi-Wan and the boy just shrugged. Maybe things weren’t as bad between them as he thought. Obi-Wan saw the pleased look in his master’s eyes, and thought the same.
"Was there anything in particular you wanted to ask, your just to meet?" Qui-Gon asked studying both students.
They looked at each other, then to Obi-Wan. Bant finally spoke, "Not really, we just wanted to meet you. Make sure you were taking care of our friend."
Reeft jumped in and added, "And to make sure he wasn’t causing you to much trouble."
Obi-Wan was the one to start blushing now, "Come on guys."
"No they’re quit right. Friends have the right to know how one of their own is acting and being treated," he said in Obi-Wan direction, "To ease your minds, he is turning out to be a very interesting apprentice. He’s even surprised me on a few occasions."
Reeft looked at his friend, "How much do you think Obi-Wan paid him the say that Bant?"
She looked hard at her old friend and with a finger on her chin said, "I’m not sure, but it must have been good." Then they all laughed.
* * * * * *
Qui-Gon stayed for almost an hour getting to know Obi-Wan’s friends, and listening to stories and given out a few of their adventures together recently. Then he noted the sun was below the Coruscant skyline and graciously excused himself.
"Well, it has been very enjoyable meeting and talking to you both; however, I will leave and let you get back to your plans for the night," he said looking out the windows.
They all stood up in respect and shook hands again. Bant smiled and said, "It’s been an honor to meet you as well Master. Thank you for coming."
"It’s been my pleasure," he smiled at them both, and nodded to Obi-Wan, "I’ll see you later."
"Yes, Master I’ll be there," Obi-Wan said with a nod. They watched Qui-Gon leave then all sat down again near the river. "What did he mean meet you later?" Bant asked eyeing her friend.
Obi-Wan knew this coming but still wasn’t ready for it. He looked at his friends and said rather sheepishly, "There’s been a change in plans. I’m leaving late tonight for Recellan 2 on our next mission."
"What happened?" Reeft asked.
"The shuttle pilot must have gotten the information mixed up somehow. Qui-Gon asked me if I wanted to stay here, but I said I wanted to go with him." Obi-Wan looked up for the first time now.
"You made the right decision. He is your master now, you are supposed to go on missions together so he can teach you things," Bant said.
Obi-Wan gave a little smile. Bant always made him feel better. "Thanks, you guys are great."
"Well, we’re just going to have to make the next few hours count aren’t we. We should go get a late snacke before the kitchen closes," Reeft threw out.
Obi-Wan laughed, "Well you sure haven’t changed."
"Oh you’ve got that right," Bant said staring at Reeft shaking her head.
"What?" Reeft asked looking innocent.
Then Bant and Obi-Wan laughed together. Reeft looked confused, "It was a perfectly good suggestion." Then his friends put an arm each around him as they all stood up and walk back toward the Temple doors.
* * * * * *
It was now 3 a.m., the time Obi-Wan and Qui-Gon were to leave for Recellan 2. Qui-Gon boarded the ship to wait, then a couple of minutes later Obi-Wan ran in and found his master, "Sorry I’m late, we couldn’t get Reeft out of the river."
Qui-Gon smiled, "Did you enjoy your first visit back?"
"Yes, very much. I don’t know why I was so nervous. It was just like old times," Obi-wan said remembering the fun the three had in the past.
"That’s good to hear," he said watching Obi-Wan remember, "You should get some sleep now. It will take about 3 hours to get to Recellan."
End Part 1
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