24 WAYS TO STRENGTHEN YOUR MARRIAGE

Marriage may not be as easy as you thought but, those who put
effort into their marriage will be rewarded with longevity,
satisfaction, and growth with the one you love.

Being the best partner possible is not always easy. At times it's
not fair. At times it hurts; it can be lonely. It involves
choosing to love your partner whether he or she deserves it or
not. It involves continuing the initial vows you made when you
began your marriage.

Here are little ways you can strengthen your marriage:

* Start each day with a kiss. Decide to begin the day with
love.

* Wear your wedding ring at all times. Let it be a visual
reminder of your commitment.

* Go on a date with your spouse once a week. Even if it's just
for coffee, dedicate time for the two of you.

* Accept differences. Try to remember that once you thought
your spouse's idiosyncrasies were cute. Your chances of
changing them are slim, so decide to live with them.

* Be polite. Are you more polite to co-workers or store clerks
than you are to the one you love? Practice good manners at
home.

* Be gentle. Harsh words and actions have no place in your
home. Choose to be kind to those you love and who love you.

* Give gifts. While diamonds are a girl's best friend, a card,
a single rose, a favorite candy bar can also do the trick.

* Smile often. Put on a happy face and let it determine your
disposition. Remember how meaningful the glances were which
you once gave each other.

* Touch. A pat on the back or a soft caress of the cheek can
show love and connection.

* Talk about dreams. Get your conversation beyond coordinating
schedules and talking about the kids. Take time to talk about
ideas and dreams.

* Give back rubs. Another day you'll be on the receiving end.

* Laugh together. Find something daily to share a laugh about.
Life is complete with laughter.

* Do what your spouse wants before being asked. Anticipate your
spouse's needs and jump right in to help. Put his or her
needs before your own comfort.

* Listen. You don't have to solve problems, just be an active
listener. Turn off the TV, put down the newspaper, and give
your spouse your full attention.

* Encourage. The best way to give support is to encourage your
spouse to do his or her best, to feel confident, or
accomplish great things.

* Call your spouse. Check in with each other throughout the day
- just to say Hi or I love you.

* Hold hands. Take a walk or watch TV while holding hands.

* Look your best. Comfort doesn't have to be socks and a
T-shirt for bed every night.

* Apologize. Almost as good as I love you is I'm sorry, forgive
me. Marriage isn't a game where you keep score. It's not
important who's right.

* Ask, What can I do to make you happier? You may be surprised
at how simple it is to please your spouse.

* Reminisce about your favorite times together. Talk about
special times you shared, and create new times together.

* Pray for your spouse daily. Don't let a day go by without
praying for your marriage, your spouse, and your family.

* Watch sunsets together. Find the beauty in life and share it.

* End each day with a hug. Decide to end the day with love.

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Steve Stephens holds a master's degree and Ph.D. from
Western Seminary. He is a licensed psychologist, a
marriage and family therapist, and a successful
seminar speaker. Steve and his wife, Tami, have three
children and live in Oregon.

Taken from: Understanding The One You Love. Copyright
(c) 1998 by Erroll E. Stephens, Jr. Published by
Harvest House Publishers, Eugene, Oregon. Used by
permission.