Poetry, a reflection of self and experances that cannot usually be expressed and understood
Here
is nowhere
and everywhere
I am trapped here
But completely free
Go figure
I don�t feel happy.
I don�t feel sad.
I just don�t feel
I hate you
Hate
Because I can�t
I can�t escape you
You draw me like
I am your puppet
On strings that stretch
Stretch on forever
But
Never break.
I hate you
Because you hate
Hate me for not
Not�
Not what?
Telling you the truth
You would hate me
I knew, the moment that I read them
Those words were meant for me
Who else calls and answers when told not to
They stung in so many ways the devistation
Of a soul in need of hope and shown despair
So heartless? No. I think not, but wishing to be
I wish to push away sometimes too
Always I�m pulled back again. Stupid karma
Stupid face, smell, hands, life.
I knew when I read them
Those words were meant to sting
I didn�t call. But this is my answer.
I still care, and you nor I can help that.
I can�t sleep, I had a bad dream
I need a walk out in the late night
Early morning air, with a good friend
Me in my sweat pants and cheap payless shoes
Thin worn-out t-shirt
Just a walk underneath the stars made hazy by streetlights
No need to talk, idle conversation unnecessary
It�s just you and me
On an early morning late night walk
A stop at in the florescent lights of the donut shop
It�s there and its open
A bagel and a donut meant for breakfast
Too quickly consumed, then back
to the darkness of the lonely hotel room
sneakers come off and sleep seeps into my bones
calm after our early morning late night walk.
A void of cluttered space, how I live; in space that is not my own but it sits there full of my
possessions. Cheery in that dismal sort of way, my environment. Dark and dreary, void
of life, my room a modge podge of belongings. Inspirational posters, my own artwork all
hung as if by accident. I don�t feel at home in this space. It is a prison. White walls dirtied
to a pale yellow with age. A wooden structure in the corner, pretending to be a bed waits
for me to feel the effects of sleep. Mattress and sheets wait to entangle me in their
unrelenting grasp. Harsh bars and flimsy cushion invite me to sit. Sit there with my feet
up on the space-eating trunk. All around me the cluttered lack of life in these objects, all
the stillness. It drains life, out of me, and out of itself. No one wants to be here, in this
cluttered void.
"Hope floats, but dreams sink in a sea of vast emptiness. The world sinks, into that same
deep purple depression. What to feel, what to think. All around me the mindless chatter,
and deep in my heart the clatter of storms. My world, torn asunder, left to sink in an open
sea of devastated dreams"
Do not invite me,
I will not be pleasent company.
Strolling through the grass
is not where i need to be.
A dark quiet room is more my style.
Please leave without me.
I don't want to meet your borish friends,
to roll and frolick mindlessly
care free in the woods.
Just leave, now. apologise for me.
to the man i have neglected in my isolation.
I will not meet him tonight, or ever.
Tell him simply; I am dead
Blank, it is better to stay that way.
Quiet passive, unknown.
She sees me, they all do.
I can not escape their eyes.
but I can dodge their minds.
I put my trust in you
handed you my emotions
joy and sadness
You are my heartbreak
Deep down inside, where the demons reside
I dream of devious dark things
Things that I can't speak or sing
I choke on them
Main page Poems main page
Blank, it is better to stay that way. Quiet passive, unknown. She sees me, they all do. I can not escape their eyes. but I can dodge their minds. I put my trust in you handed you my emotions joy and sadness You are my heartbreak Deep down inside, where the demons reside I dream of devious dark things Things that I can't speak or sing I choke on them Main page Poems main page
