business and ibit humour

 

·        what did a barking puppy said to ibiters ?         

  1. i bit and i can bite you …….of course.

 

A.    IBIT admission process.

 

·        English teacher: if “you are not given admission to ibit “is the news. is it sensitive, non sensitive or wat?

 

    student: the news might be sensitive but the consequences of the news will be sensationally sensitive.

 

 

 

   student: it is “ad-jective” rather

 

 

 

a: i will eat money

   i will drink money

        i will sleep   money

 

    theory y: every employee loves to work as the manager was when he was in employee’s place

 

engineering student: i loved the mechanism of chairlifts.

art student: i loved the lanscape.it was awesome.

IBIT student: urrgh! i couldn’t even find a copy of Business Recorder there.

 

 

Movies and their probable interpretations by business students

 

the matrix reloaded

kabhi khushi kabhi ghum

teen deewarein

charlie’s angels

laaj

yeh dil apka hua

 

american chai

bend it like beckam

t3:rise of the machines

the matrix reloaded inc.

kabhi profit kabhi loss

teen deewarein aur char expenses

charlie’s employees

laaj(in the stock market)

yeh bill apka hua(aur paisay hamaray)

american chai aur srilankan brand

sell it like beckam

t3:rise of the IBmachines

 

 

if IBIT were a software from Microsoft…

 

  1. Students would be required to submit an error report to the director each time something goes wrong.
  2. We would be able to multitask i.e. to take many classes at the same time.
  3. The classrooms will crash every time a teacher overloads students with assignments.
  4. An anti-virus tool would be in place to rid the institution of all the nasty influences.
  5. The syllabus would never be compatible with the syllabus elsewhere but the opposite might be possible.
  6. Those who fail would have to install the software again.
  7. We would just have to press just   start to access our class anytime,anywhere

 

 

 

                                      Peace

 

The bird of peace flies away every while,

From the threatening winds of violence

The sky of peace is marred every often

By the smoke and trail of destruction,

I am grateful to providence for having blessed me with

Inner peace to shun all the exterior fears

The edifice of exterior peace may tumble

But the clasp of inner peace holds me in the place

Everyone who is anyone will have to let the love within them grow

Lest words like harmony, peace, amity are reduced to dictionary space

All of us can contribute a drop in the ocean of peace  

 By showering love and spreading good vibes around

Sectarianism, Jingoism and terrorism will cease

If feelings of love and harmony abound

Ayesha was a cute, cheery, innocent child of seven

She lived with her brother, friends and parents

One day her world came to crumbling ruins

 

 

May peace proliferate in this brave new world?

May the light of love brighten our lives?

 

 

 

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