Week 6: San Diego Chargers

Week 6: Raiders vs Chargers

Wanna bounce back after losing a heartbreaker to the Niners? Well, there's no better team to do that than with the San Diego Chargers, who have limped their way to a miserable 0-5. With BJ Tolliver posting botton-of-the-barrel numbers, and Marion Butts (BJ and Butts what a pairing...) barely in the top 10 in rushing, it doesn't look like I'll have much touble with these bottom-feeders. Their 26th-ranked defense probably won't be much help to them either. I'd be surprised if I didn't dominate in this game.

1st Quarter

Things started going bad for the Chargers on the opening kickoff, where Nate Lewis fumbled and gave it to Riki Ellison. I start off with my usual "hand-it-off-to-Bo" offense and end up inside the 20. The drive ended in the usual way with Jackson in the endzone. San Diego gets in a quick 3-and-out before they punt. On the return Tim Brown takes it to the LA 15, but unfortunately he leaves the game with an injured...spleen, I guess. For now, Steve Smith and "Big Daddy" Sam Graddy will be sharing return duties (and yes, I know it really doesn't matter too much). Les Miller gets in a sack before the end of the quarter.
Raiders 7, Chargers 0

He probably won't be anything big anyway...

Yeah, I know this is the 3rd quarter, but the 2nd was rather boring.

2nd Quarter

I make my way to the 45 with Bo and Marcus Allen, but shortly thereafter my offense craps out and I have to punt. Greg Townsend stuffs the reverse play for a 7 yard loss, and their offense can't make up the difference, so San Diego punts again. At this point I'm rather distracted by how bad the Chargers are playing and start unintentionally running down the clock with Bo. With 3 seconds left in the half, Jay Schroeder bombs a pass to Mervyn Fernandez, but he falls short about 35 yards.

Halftime; Raiders 7, Chargers 0

Wow, what a craptastic game this is turning out to be. Without Bo this would be one of the worst games I've ever been apart of. At this point, the Bolts have gained a total of 12 yards of offense, and the way things are going this trend might not change anytime soon. In short, don't let my relatively small lead fool you into thinking San Diego has any chance of winning.

3rd Quarter

You'd think at this point, I'd stop passing enitrely, but somehow I decide it's a good idea to call that pass play in the 1st slot on 2nd and 4. I figure if Schroeder throws an incompletion or even gets sacked I still can convert with Bo. Of course, there are times, like on this 2nd and 4 play, that Schroeder goes Jeff George on me and throws a pick. San Diego gets themselves into John Carney range with a 20 yard run by Quinn Early, the 2nd-last guy I'd expect to run 20 yards on me (the 1st being Ricky "molasses" Proehl). They inch their way down the field and score a touchdown with Butts from the 3 yard line. I run the ball 3 times with Bo, but I'm 3 yards short so I punt. San Diego goes back to playing "Charger football" and puts together a -4 yard drive, highlighted by a sack by Ellison.
Raiders 7, Chargers 7

WAHAHAHA!! Marion 'Seymour' Butts! HAHAHAHA!!!

Now this is the picture of domination.

4th Quarter

After getting stuffed on a picked play, Jackson gets serious and runs for 30 yards to the San Diego 33. Unfortunately, the computer cheats and picks the next 3 plays, the last one being a Henry Rolling sack. Knowing that Jeff Jeager is probably going to miss this field goal from the 49, I do it anyway and, wouldn't you know it, he missed. Having a golden opportunity to take lead, the Dolts naturally screw it up with an untimely turnover, this one a bomb that ends up in the hands of Eddie Anderson. On first down Bo immediately gives me the lead with a 55 yard TD run. But with 1:28 left, the Chargers aren't ready call it quits just yet and prove it with a 46 yard pass play to Early. Two plays later, Butts runs up the butt...I mean gut...and gets all the way to the 1 with 22 seconds left. San Diego decides to waste 11 seconds with a reverse that goes -11 yards, and then tries to run Butts again. This, as you might expect, ends in failure.

Final

All in all, this was a pretty horrible game for both teams. Bo ran the ball well enough to win, but that was about it. Everything else in this game was crap. Totally smelly-ass crap. No other way to describe this awful trainwreck of a football game.

Player of the game: Bo Jackson
19 carries 178 yards 2 TDs

The only reason he gets PotG this week is he was only one on offense that actually gave a damn. Granted, he looked pretty overwhelmed at times, but he always bounced back with big runs. Unfortunately, I can't say the same for the rest of these losers.

Rest of the Week

MIA 26, NE 28 MIA: Marino 53% for 211 yds 1 INT NE: Stephens 16 car 122 yds, 4 rec 93 yds	GIA 28, PHX 24 GIA: Ingram 5 rec 157 yds PHX: Rosenbach 60% for 182 yds 0 INTs
BUF 21, KC 17 BUF: QB Bills 69% for 232 yds 0 INTs KC: Word 13 car 92 yds, 2 rec 95 yds	IND 23, PIT 27 IND: George 61% for 201 yds 2 INTs PIT: 188 rush yds
CIN 28, SEA 9 CIN: 272 total yds, 13 first downs SEA: 208 total yds, 9 first downs	JETS 34, CLE 10 JETS: OBrien 77% for 334 yds 0 INTs CLE: 201 total yds, 7 first downs
HOU 30, DEN 19 HOU: Duncan 6 rec 197 yds DEN: 140 rush yds	DET 24, MIN 17 DET: Peete 71% for 223 yds 0 INTs, 7 car 47 yds MIN: 122 rush yds (Fenney returned)
PHI 28, TB 24 PHI: QB Eagles 64% for 217 yds 1 INT, 4 car 57 yds TB: Testverde 61% for 295 yds 2 INTs	DAL 28, GB 10 DAL: 153 rush yds GB: 198 total yds, 9 first downs
WAS 24, CHI 33 WAS: Rypien 58% for 268 yds 2 INTs CHI: Harbaugh 61% for 249 yds 1 INT

Raiders' Stats (5-1)

Offense: 1558 total yds (16th), 527 pass yds (28th), 1031 rush yds (1st)
Defense: 1065 total yds (1st), 519 pass yds (1st), 546 rush yds (16th)
Individual:
Passing: Schroeder 16/35 (45.7% 527 yds (15.0 avg) 4 TDs 4 INTs 93.3 rating (NR)
Rushing: Jackson 92 car 944 yds (10.2 avg) 12 TDs (1st...next closest is 579)
Receiving: Fernandez 7 rec 326 yds (46.5 avg) 3 TDs (NR)
Defense: Ellison 9 sacks (T-2), Anderson 4 INTs (T-3)
Returning: Brown 12.0 KR avg (28th), 6.7 PR avg (16th)
Kicking: Jaeger 2/6 FGA (T-19), Gossett 51.5 punt avg (6th)

Week 6 Standings

Buffalo Bills 5-1
Los Angeles Raiders 5-1
Pittsburgh Steelers 4-1
Miami Dolphins 4-2
Houston Oilers 3-2
Cincinnati Bengals 3-2
Kansas City Chiefs 3-3
New England Patriots 3-3
Seattle Seahawks 3-3
Cleveland Browns 2-3
New York Jets 2-4
Dever Broncos 1-5
Indianapolis Colts 1-5
San Diego Chargers 0-6

Chicago Bears 6-0
New York Giants 5-1
Philedelphia Eagles 4-2
San Fransisco 49ers 3-2
Atlanta Falcons 3-2
Minnesota Vikings 3-3
Green Bay Packers 3-3
New Orleans 2-3
Los Angeles Rams 2-3
Detroit Lions 3-3
Dallas Cowboys 2-4
Phoenix Cardinals 2-4
Washington Redskins 2-4
Tampa Bay Buccaneers 1-5

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