Journal

Aug. 28, 1995-
I checked this afternoon at 3:08 pm on Monday the 28th of August to see if my letter was gone.� It was!

Aug. 31, 1995-
What if Tony Danza doesn't answer me. What if Tony Danza isn't the nice person he seems to be? What if he's a snot, idiot, muscular jerk.� He could be any one of those things.� I dont even know him.� I keep thinking in my mind that he's a kind, gentle, yet tough cute guy when really he could be the exact opposite.� I keep imagining that he's just like Tony Micelli. But he was only acting...

What the hell is this?

A very good question. These things are taken from my diary when i was about 10 or 11 years old and my life seemed to revolve around tony danza.� I look back on them now and scare myself. I'm not really sure you want to read them...

Sept. 1, 1995-
Today I watched Who's The Boss? as always.� It was about budgeting the household.� What they did was put tony in charge of the budget since angela's business had been failing and she said she couldnt handle it anymore.� I thought it was funny because tony went too far with the budget.� he had to take angela's credit cards away. then after a while she went nuts because she wanted to buy things.� then angela got upset because she said that the only reason she liked to buy things was because it made her feel better.� she also said she was nothing without her joband that no one would like her if she didnt have a job.� tony then said that he would still love her even if they were poor and she didnt have a job.� then he gave her a hug.� i thought that was sweet. oh i forgot to tell you that these episodes are the stage where they will soon be getting married.� i already know that they will no get married for some reason.� i wish they did. when i get older ( i just turned 11 now ) i hope to marry someone like tony micelli.� i would say tony danzabut i'm not yet sure if he's as nice he seems.� i think he's nice but i'm not positive.� we'll see later, i hope.

Sept. 2, 1995-
.....As we're driving i'm thinking that tony got the letter.� its been four days and its past 3 o'clock ( its 5:38 37 pm ) so he had to have gotten it. you must be thinking that i'm crazy about TD ( thats what i call him the reason i call him that is because i dont really know what to call him.� Tony Danza? Tony? or Mr. Danza? so i figured TD would be just fine ) well i am. he is so cute and adorable.

Sept. 4, 1995-
Today Who's The Boss? wasnt on!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Instead Jerry Lewis with the Muscular Distrophy was on . I was so upset! I wish they could've had it on channel 11 or any other station except for 9, but they didnt.� after i finally got over the fact that Who's the Boss wouldn't be on i went on dads computer.� i tried to look up danza on prodigy but nothing camp up.� i then looked up tv shows and found hudson street. the season premiere will be on tuesday, sept 19 at 8:30pm. the only problem is that my bedtime is 8:30!) i'm allowed then to read til 9o'clock. but my mom says that she might let me stay up!!! when i said TD had to of gotten the letter on sept 2nd he might nothave gotten it because it was a week end. probably no one was there at the set.�

Sept. 5, 1995-
He had to of gotten it.

Sept. 7, 1995-
I'm still waiting.

Sept. 8, 1995-
....I was supposed to be taping Who's the Boss today but i forgot to pu tin the tape!!!!!!!!!!!! how stupid of me! i hope i didnt miss an important show.� that would be horrid.

Sept. 9, 1995-
The mail hasnt come yet since its 1:47pm.� Keep your fingers crossed.... I forgot to tell you ( I always forget to tell you things ) that on friday i sat next to colleen buzby and we started to talk.� she first brought up tonathan taylor thomas and how he was so much cuter than TD.� now i think this kid is cute, but i had to stick up for Tony so i said that he wasnt and thast when she said he was a dork!!! i then replied 'do you have something against italians?" and she said "yes". ( we were doing this as a joke because we didnt have anything else to do. we didnt mean what we said. ) thats when the battle began.� it was funny because we called each other names and made fun of the guys that the other one liked. it was fun! it proably seemed stupid to you.

Sept. 11, 1995-
I have no time to write. All i'll tell you is that emily found an article in the newspaper ( Star Ledger ) about TD so she's going to see if she can bring it in. Bye!

Sept. 12, 1995-
.... I watched Who's the Boss ( it was taped ) it was when samantha micelli ( tonys daughter on the show ) gets married to Hank, a guy who quit medical school to be a puppeteer. it was funny! ... Oh, Emily forgot to bring the article on TD. Maybe tomorrow i'll see it. well gotta go. Bye!

Sept. 13, 1995-
I read this whole article and now i feel stupid. Like why am i so crazy about him. I barely known him. He's got a family. Why would he care if some stupid little 6th grader sent him a boring letter? he's got better things to do than write a letter os send a picture back to me. i'm such an idiot. i dont know why, but i feel like crying. its sort of the same feeling i got when i wrote him a letter on the 28th of august when i realized that i had a major crush on him. but why would i be feeling that way now after i said that i was stupid for liking him and i didnt even know him? why? maybe its because i'm obsessed with him and i now realize that he hasa life, a family and that he doesnt care about fans ( i think and assume that ) i keep saying this but i dont know what else to do . i feel stupid! maybe someone can relate to me. have theyever felt this way? i feel like he's a stranger ( he is ) i always though i knew him. but looking through this whole article i know i dont. and he looked so different. so much older. he doesnt look like the tony micelli that i thought i knew. i'm such a dork. i'm so confused. please help me!

Sept. 14, 1995-
I still have that strange feeling and i still feel like a dork...i dont know what it is about himthat i like so much. i always thought he was so nice, but know i realize he might not be to his fans. he's sorta mean to some of them... he looks so much older now. i saw him in angels in the outfield a while ago. its a good movie, and tony looks sorta the same, but a lot different. i'm so used to seeing him in WTB where he's aboutten years younger...

Sept. 15, 1995-
...No letter from TD...

Sept. 16, 1995-
Nothing from TD...I watched Brotherly Love with Joey Lawrence as the main character. He's cute ( I dont know if more than TD. ) Gotta go, bye!

Sept. 17, 1995-
There is only ten more days left til i give up on TD sending me a letter. I feel like crying. TD may not be that good looking anymore ( sometimes he is, sometimes he's not) i have alot of pictures that arent that good... but there is something abouthim that draws you in like a mgnet. his voice. i love the sound of his voice. i dontknow if i'd like his voice if i'd have never seen him before on WTB. and the way he laughs is so cute. they gave him a very short interview today and they showed a clip of his new show!! he laughed the same as on WTB. Plus on WTB the director or producer had Tony say a line whenever he was embarrassed or when he felt someone was making fun of him. he said Ay Oh, Oh Ay! and i think sometimes he'd just say Oh Ay Oh. He's say it in a tough voice. i also noticed that whenever he'd get madon the show he'd talk in italian. i thought that was cute too. they probably got it from i love lucy. these things i pick up on are really stupid because in real life he wouldnt say them, and they are part of the reason why i like him so much. i'd give anything just to hear his voice say 'Hello Vanessa' Am i crazy or what?! I hope he sends...I know that gods got way more important problems like world peace andhunger. but please if he finds some extra time, i hope he would make my wish come true. This would mean so much. i just thought of a quote i really like. never say never. Bye.

Sept. 19, 1995-
Nothing!!!! I'm getting upset. Oh i saw the last WTB show. it was VERY good. i t was a little bit like the first show. that may seem weird, but it was. also i saw the first hudson street show. he definitely looks older, but not too bad. he sings the theme song. he's got a good voice. i didint like the show that much, but i can't say anything because i probably didnt like WTB when it first came on. i forgot to tell you, he's also the executive producer...I wish he'd send. its driving me nuts. i today i thought it was him cause mom said there was a letter for me. i got so wild thinking it was him, but it wasnt.

Sept. 24, 1995-
Four more days left and nosign of Tony Danza...I wish that i could look into Mr Danza's <-- why the hell am i calling him that?-- head and find out if he is really like the pesron we see on tv. who knows, he could be a sarcastic mean man away from all the cameras. we may never know. i just wish i did because its so frustrating. i wish i knew so i'd either be able to get over him or i'd just stay madly in love with him. its weird, at the age of 11, i think i know what love feels like. this has been the first time i've ever said that about someone thats not a relative. it may seem weird to you, heck it seems weird to me. i barely know the guy andi'msaying i'min love with him. Strange. love feels like your floatingwith your mind free yet your crammed with all these thoughts. plus you feel like there's butterfiles in your stomache...I'd love to get the letter, wish me luck.br>
Sept. 25, 1995-
I think i've lost all hope in seeing a letter come back from Tony Danza! I dont want to but it seems thats what has happened. Its weird because everyday i hope and say 'i betcha that when i get home the letter will be in the mail waiting for me' theni get all excited and i rush home andlook through the mail and nothings there...

Sept. 26, 1995-
Nothing! Let me pick up where i left off...Buti dont feel that bad because its like i really knew that he would never send. itsstrange because probably five minutes before i would've been almost positive hthat the letter would be there. AHHHH! I cant find Tony's address!! I've looked every where. i thought i had pu tit in this booke! What should i do?! hold on 3MIN LATER I found IT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! it was in my other diary.

Oct. 2, 1995-
HE never sent. I guess it wasnt meant to be. i can only wish it will come true. so i guess that means no tony danza. i could just as well cross off TD on the cover of this book. nah. i dont think i ever could do that. i had sucha big crush onhim ( still do ) thati dont think i'll ever forget him. it sounds weird because i dont even know him, but thats how i feel andi wish i could chante it but i cant. my feelings will probably never change towards him. i can only wish that someday i'll become friends with him. gotta go. depressing day.

Oct. 10, 1995-
I'd give just about anything to meet TD. noone knows how i feel. kids make fun of him and call him an old fogie. i dont. he may not be as good looking, but his laugh everything about him is so adorable. at least tony micelli. on hudson street he seems different. not as funny and care free as TM on WTB. That means that TD is only acting like TM ( was ) He said on an interview that hudson street was the best show he ever did and that it releates to his real life. if soi guess i don tlike him. maybe not. i just dont understand everything anymore. if he's not that good looking and if i dont know him or if the little part i know about him i dont like and if he's not funny anymore, then why do i like him?? i wish i could get over him so i could tell you about other interesting things that hapen to me. nobody else has these feelings that i have. its so indescribeable, i wish i could get rid of it... i can only hope that this feeling will leave me alone and i can get on with my life. i know i've mentioned all this stuff a billion times but i mean it. it keeps bothering me.

Oct. 13, 1995-
I talked about TD to a lot of people today. everyone knows i like him. its weird because i still like him eventhough he didnt return my letter.

Oct. 15, 1995-
---some of this stuff should go in my dreams page but i'm too lazy to put it there. sorry guys...yeah, i know you really care :) who the hell do i think is actually reading this now anyway?! oh well, its fun writing it--- Yesterday i had a dream about tony danza. it left that strange and funny feelign again. it also left a feeling that i wanted to cry. the dream wasnt very strange. it felt lik it couldve been real. the only thing that didnt seem like him was that his voice didnt sound so good. the only problem was that at the end of the dream het very cross at me and stormed off. thats when the emptiness feeling hit me. it was later replaced by the feeling that i always get when i thik about td. whenhe got mad and me and stormed off i felt as if my whole world had shattered. it seemed like it was real life. i'm getting afraid that when i'm older that if i go on a date or marry somebody or even meet TD that he will run out and i wont see him again. it makesme so depressed. help me a little so i wontfeel lik ethis! ...in my dream when i met him i felt like i was in heaven. when he said hello all i could do was stare at his adorable eyes and face and smile i acted so shy. guess what?! he told me thathe was sorry that he didnt write back my letter. i forgive him. it took a while for me to actually have the guts to talk to TD in my dream. i felt so happy and carefree and light that i felt i could float away. i'd almost anything to be at that part of my dream again. he could light the darkest of tunnels or the stormiest of days. his daughter doesnt know how lucky she is t o have him as a father. thats if he is as nice as he seems. i'd gladly trade places with her for one day. or more.

BELIEVE IT OR NOT, I HAVE MORE OF THIS. I'LL ADD IT LATER.

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