- The Making Changes Continuum - Episode One - Father Not Mine - By Neo Hippy Purple - 


Daria is copyright 2000, MTV, a division of Viacom International, Inc. All rights reserved. Used 
without permission. This fanfic copyright 2000, by the girl who's alias is Neo Hippy Purple. 



Ruth Morgendorffer, a svelt woman around 25, walked down 5th Avenue in New York City, staring 
happily at her surroundings. She headed into a bar and sat down. Immediately, a throng of men 
surrounded her, buying her drinks and enchanting her with tales of life at sea. After awhile, a 
very drunk Ruth headed out of the bar with one of the men. He guided her into and up the stairs 
in a hotel, leading her into a room and laying her down on the bed. They began to undress.


A few days later, Ruth Morgendorffer walked into the front door of the house she shared with her 
husband, Marcus "Mad Dog" Morgendorffer. She loved him as best she could, but he was a cold, 
abusive, WWII Veteran, and she knew he didn't love her. He caught her as she walked in. 


Marcus: C'm'ere, Woman! I want some throat!


He pulled her towards the bedroom. Ruth sighed, knowing exactly what he meant.


Nine months later...


Ruth was in agony. She never thought childbirth could be THIS painfull. She pushed, pushed, and 
a white light grew brighter above her head. Every thing was silent, except for her breathing and 
pushing. The light grew, grew, grew, and WAAAAAH!!! Little squinty eyes peered at her from her 
arms, as her baby, soon to be called Jake, was placed gently against her. She sighed, smiled, 
and closed her eyes. 


Twenty years later, Ruth Morgendorffer walked into a morgue and confronted the residing 
mortitian. 


Ruth: Sir, I have a request. I'd like to have a DNA sample taken from my late husband's body.


Mortitian: Name?


Ruth: Marcus Morgendorffer.



Mortitian: Ah, yes, we have him here. Let me prep the needle....


Twenty five years after that, Ruth Morgendorffer headed purposefully up to the door of her son's 
house and knocked loudly. Daria opened the door.


Daria: Uh, hi, Gramma Ruth.


Ruth: Hello, Daria. Is your father in?


Daria: No, he's still at work. 


Ruth: What about your mother?


Daria: Still in court.


Ruth: QUINN?!


Daria: Fashion Club meeting.


Ruth: (sighs) I guess I'll wait.


She picked up her suitcase and headed up to the guestroom. A few hours later, Jake walked in 
the door and Daria informed him of her presence. He headed up to the guest room and walked over 
to the bed, shaking her.


Jake: Mommy? Mommy!


He frantically put his finger on her neck, and screamed.


He began to sob, and Daria looked on sadly and dialed a number.


Daria: Hello. May I speak to the Coroner? 



Commercial Break.


End Commercial Break.



Jake watched sadly as the body of his last living relative was put on a stretcher and loaded 
into an ambulance. He shed a few tears as he realized that he would never see her alive again. 
She was the first person to love him, and he the last to love her. His eyes followed the lights 
of the ambulance as it headed of into the twilight, and then walked upstairs.


In the guest room, Jake looked guiltily at his mother's suitcase, and then reasoned with himself 
that after a week, it was time for some closure. He popped the lid and looked inside. A change 
of clothes and an envelope were all it contained. The envelope opened easily. Jake read it aloud.


Mrs. Morgendorffer, we wish to inform you of the results of the DNA testing done on your husband 
and your son. The results confirm non-matching DNA. Please inform your son. Thank-you.


Jake looked shocked beyond beleif. He screamed a high, girlish scream, and fainted dead away.


Daria heard a scream from upstairs, followed by a thump. Daria smirked and headed upstairs, 
stopping in the bathroom to grab a bottle of strong perfume. She went to the guest room and 
put it under her dad's nose, waving it back and forth. Jake slowly woke up, groggy, and rubbed 
the back of his head.


Jake: Are Helen and Quinn here?


Daria: Nope.


Jake: Okay. Um, family meeting after dinner tonight.


Daria: Family meeting? We never have a family meeting.


Jake: Well, this is important. Just stick around the table after dinner.


Daria: Hmm. Okay. Whatever.


She shrugged and headed to her room. Her phone rang just as she sat down.


Daria: Hello?


Jane: Yo! You wanna come over tonight? I found home movies. Perfect subject for bad movie night. 


Daria: Okay. I may take awhile. Dad actually wants us to have a family meeting after dinner. 


Jane: What about?


Daria: I've got no idea. He DID faint this afternoon. Screamed and dropped. Hit his head pretty 
hard. I used some of Quinn's perfume to wake him up. He looked like he had a hangover. 


Jane: He didn't puke, did he?


Daria: Funny. No, I think this has something to do with Gramma Ruth's death. He was going 
through her suitcase. Maybe he fainted because he saw her underwear or something.


Jane: Oh, yeah. Sorry about that. 


Daria: It's okay. It's not like she was young or anything. Then again, she wasn't old either. 
Anyway, I gotta go. It's my turn to make dinner tonight. Thank god. Unless mom ran out of 
fishsticks and decided to go back to lasagne. 


Jane: Well, see ya later. 


Daria: Bye.


She hung up and headed downstairs to make dinner. 


Meanwhile, at Sandi's house...


Sandi: I now call this meeting of the Fashion Club to order. First of all, and news on old 
business?


Quinn stood, the signal that she had something to say. They all had decided that just talking 
was rude, and raising hands was childish.


Sandi: Yes, Quinn?


Quinn: We're all coping the death of my Grandmother very well. I think my dad may not have a 
heart attack after all.


Stacy and Tiffany: That's great, Quinn! Excellent.


Sandi: Congratulations. We won't, like, have to kick you out for trauma after all.


Quinn: I know. 


Sandi: Anyone else?


Silence. Sandi nodded, and pulled a box out from under her bed.


Sandi: Well, other than the death of Quinn's Grandmother, there has been nothing going on in our 
town. Untill now. I've gotten word from my mother, who works with one of the fashion designers 
from Prada, that there will, like, be a fashion convention in a few months. This hasn't been 
released from the public, but I've managed to get my hands on some tickets, for us and a few 
other fashion hopefulls from school.


Others: YES!


Sandi: And so, to celebrate, or whatever, I have fat free chocolate chip Kudos bars for everyone.


She hands Tiffany and Stacy each one, and the tosses one to Quinn, who misses it. It falls on 
the floor. Quinn picks it up and simply peels off the part that touched the floor, and then, 
while Sandi turns to get her own, she flips her off and then swings her hand around, slapping 
her in the back and making her drop her own.


Quinn: Thanks, Sandi! Is the meeting ajourned yet? Cuz I have to go home. It's my night to cook 
dinner and I have to order the fat free pizza before the rush. Bye!


She rushes out of there in a hurry. 


Back at Daria's house, Daria has pulled a vegetable casserole from the freezer, and put in in 
the oven. Helen walks in and opens the freezer, taking out a lasagne and heading towards the 
oven.


Daria: Uh, mom?


Helen: Yes, sweetie?


Daria: It's my night to make dinner.


Helen: (agitated) Then why aren't you?


Daria: (even more anoyed, heads out) It's in the oven. Family meeting after dinner. 


Helen: Oh. (calls) Sorry for yelling, Daria. 


Daria: (OS) Yes. 


Helen: What's that supposed to mean?


Silence. Helen sighs and puts the lasagne back, sitting at the counter and starting on some 
legal breifs. Quinn saunters in and picks up the phone, speed dialing pizza king.


Quinn: Hello, I'd like to order a small cheeseless pizza, a small peperoni pizza, a small 
hawaiian pizza, and a small all-meat pizza. 


Helen: Quinn, dinner's in the oven. 


Quinn: Oh. You coulda told me before. Nevermind, then. 


She hangs up.


Quinn: Anyway, thanks for making dinner.


She leaves. 


Helen: Your sister made dinner. 


Silence. Helen sighs again and shuts her breifcase, heading to the fridge and taking out a 
wine cooler. She pops the top, takes off her jacket and shoes, and heads out back to sit in a 
lawn chair for awhile. 


Later, around dinner, everyone was silent except Jake, who smiled and hummed and ate his dinner 
quickly. After everyone finished, he tapped his glass with his fork.


Jake: Everyone, can I have your attention? I have an announcement. I'm not the child of Mad Dog 
Morgendorffer.



Commercial Break.


End Commercial Break.



Everyone was stunned. No one knew what to say. Helen decided to speak up first. 


Helen: Honey, did you just say...


Jake: Yep. That's what mom came here to tell me. She knew she was going to die, so she brought 
me the results of a DNA test she did when Mad Dog died. I'm not his son. There was a letter in 
her suitcase confirming that, and a letter from her, saying that she got pregnant by a sailor 
while she was in New York City on business. 


Helen: Is she sure?


Jake: She said she went back to the hotel room sometime later to get her suitcase and found 
blood and... uh, nevermind.... 


Daria: Does she know his name?


Jake: She mentioned that she'd asked the hotel clerk his name, because it was his hotel room. 
The guys answer was... let me check the letter... Lane. Gregory Lane.


Daria nearly choked on her food.


Daria: Are you sure?


Jake: Almost positive. 


Daria: I gotta go!


She got up and left, grabbing her backpack from the hallway on the way out. 


Helen: That was strange.


Quinn: Yeah. 


Jake: I hope she's all right.


Daria got to Jane's house and nearly busted the door knocking on it. Jane opened it.


Jane: Yeesh! What's the rush to see home movies?


Daria: It's not that. What's your Grandfather's name?


Jane: Huh? 


Daria: Answer the question, please.


Jane: Uh, Gregory. Why? 


Daria sat down hard, looking dazed, and stared right through Jane's wall. 


Jane: What's going on here? 


Daria: My dad is not a Morgendorffer. When Gramma was in New York in 1955, she had an affair 
with a man named Gregory Lane.


At this, Jane gasps an sits down, too.


Daria: Little Jakey was born nine months later. When Grandad died, Gramma had a DNA test done. 
Jake wasn't his son. He just found out. 


Jane pauses to take this in, then talks. 


Jane: My Grandfather was a sailor. He stayed in Stamford for a couple of weeks, long enough to 
get to know my Grandma and marry her. He got her pregnant, and then died a few days later in a 
car crash. Grandma gave birth to my dad, Vincent. He married my mom in '73, when they were 
eighteen, and they had Summer, Wind, Penny, and Trent between then and '78, and me in '83. That 
makes us....


Daria: Half cousins. 


Jane paused to take this in as well, then opened her mouth wide.


Jane: Trent!!!


There was a thump, and a crash, and then Trent, clad in only jeens, came rushing out into the 
living room. 


Trent: What is it Janey? Is the house on fire?


Jane: You, Penny, Summer, Wind, and I are Daria's half cousins.


Trent: Huh?


Daria began to explain the whole thing to him. Trent called his Grandmother, who confirmed that 
her husband had mentioned being in NYC in '55. Daria, Jane, and Trent soaked up all this new 
information, and then headed back to the Morgendorffer's. Daria led them into the living room, 
where Helen, Jake, and Quinn were all watching TV.


Daria: I'd like you to meet my half cousins. 


Helen fainted, Jake looked confused, and Quinn just shook her head in disgust.


Quinn: Great. I'm related to even more freaks!




The End, for now...