EASports500

Talladega! Are you ready for some white knuckles?.....Well, how about some tattooed ones?

I love this place. Huge track. 38 miles around. And with turns that are banked like a step-ladder. Fastest track in the Milky Way at one time. Back in 1970, Buddy Baker started breakin' speed records here by making a 200 mph run with a horse & buggy. Years later, Bill Elliott qualified on the pole by breaking the sound barrier....Chuck Yeager started 2nd. But that was before restrictors; back before NASCAR cut the power to these motors by oh...98%. And cut the speeds by 99%.
...Man, I hate Talladega.

I hate this idea of 'strictor speed limits. I hate watchin' 'em take 6 laps to get up to speed. And I don't much like the look of these aerodynigmas they're racin' nowadays either. Why not give 'em each a Kenworth with an ungoverned diesel. And the only time I wanna see that many cars all bunched together and tryin' to get up front is near the end of the race.
...Man, I love Talladega.

I love the last 20 laps of these plate races. You could still have 25-30 cars with a legitimate shot. A driver could be buried mid-pack at the white flag and still take the checkers. Just last year, Dale (Sr.) came from 18 laps down with three to go, and won this race. Anyone can walk away with this thing as long as they stay with the pack. And stay outta "the big one".
...Man, I hate Talladega.

I hate knowin' that sooner or later, there's gonna be a huge wreck. They go-karted a caution free race here a few months ago, but that's a rarity. For the most part, you can expect a 42 car pile up at some point today. (And you can expect to hear the name Buckshot during the replays.) Hell, just yesterday, a silly mistake near the front of the pack led to big crash in practice. I saw Ward & Purvis start the wreck, and I saw 5 drivers have to go back to the garage for a mulligan. I saw all this during TNT's coverage of Happy Hour.
...Man, I love Talladega.

I mean, what other sport televises its practices?. Who else shows you a full blown, high-speed workout before the big game. Does the NBA? The MLB? When's the last time you saw a Cowboys' or Redskins' practice session? (....Well, okay, yeah, this past Monday night. Can you name another time?) With NASCAR though, you get it all. For example, on Friday, I got to watch Rusty qualify (...32nd.) Then I got to see him "scrimmage" on Saturday (....A wreck.) And today I get to see him try to win at this superduper speedway.
...Man. I hate Talladega.

.....Now c'mon. After that, do you honestly think I'm in any mental shape make a prediction for this race?
It's Talladega...Your guess is as good as mine.

Schizophrenically yours,
Robert Mitchum..."Night of the Hunter" (1955)