2000CocaCola600

Indianapolis 500 Rain Delay....Please stay tuned for a encore presentation of Charlotte's Web...

The slot cars are waitin' for the track to dry at Indy, and ABC is rerunnin' last year's nail-nibbler. Quick prediction...Kenny Brack. As a matter of fact, pick ANY of the last 20-25 years of Indy races and I can tell ya who won. Between Speedvision, ESPN Classic, ESPN One through Seven, TBS, TNT, TNN, and Mister T, I've watched just about every race ever run this past week.

"What time did you come ot bed last night, Jim"

".......4"

"(sigh) And who won this time?"

"EmersonFittipaldi.AndthecoolthingwasthiswastheracethatEmocamefrom-"

"This is the 9th time this week. Just how much longer are they going to show all these old races.?"

"All week. "

"Jim.....You're going to die."

Indy cars on one channel. Stock cars on another. Is this heaven?.....No. It's Iowa. And we've got cable.

ABC coulda done better than replayin' last year's 'Brack'yard gift. I've seen Mario win it. I've seen Mears win it. I've seen all ninety of the Unser family's wins. I've seen Roberto "Go-Rearwards" spin on the parade lap and lose before the race even started. I've seen Danny Sullivan spin at 400 mph and still win. I've even seen "OJ" Foyt lose, and not kill anyone.

Robby Gordon runs outta fuel in the 1999 version with an acre or two to go and Kenny coasts in for the tall glass of milk. It was much more exciting when Al Unser, Sr. did the same thing a couple of nights ago.

Uh oh. Gomer is singing the that Indiana Jones song. Gotta hurry this up...

Time Warner Cable didn't forget our stockboys and had it's own marathon of NASCAR races. Watched Marlin's Dad, Coo-Coo run 2nd in some prehistoric Daytona race. And saw Sterling win one. Bet ya ten he see's only a 14th here at Charlotte.   (Hey, Dave..."Ten he see's"....I still got it....)

Rick Mast has no wins to showcase in our video archive. But with AJ in his pits, today could just be the day. Wait. AJ's up at Indy. Rick starts and finishes 23rd.

Jeff Gordon has won this race three times. Jeff Gordon has won just about every race three times. It's fate. He comes in third.

Uh oh...Green Flag....Back in a commercial or two...

Greg Ray's leadin'. Juan Montoyota is 2nd.   Where was I?

Tony Stewart did the double dip last year. Ran both races and was carried off like Apollo Creed...."Not gonna be no rematch."   After last week's cheapshot on the #6 car, don't be surprized to see Burgess Meredith is in the Martin pits this week, Tony. The 20 car slugs his way to 9th.

Steve Park is 0 for 67 and doesn't rate a rerun either. But last week's Winston might get a replay or two. Who wouldn't wanna see Park's cross check of Nemechek and Neme-checkin' back?....Who wouldn't wanna SAY it? Steve Spinnzoils once but manages a 12th.

Juan Montovanni just passed Ray. Back in 5......Make it 10.

Greg Ray out...Lynn St. James Place out. And an uncertain Unser day.

I couldn't wait for a rusty, old Rusty rerun. So I popped in a tape of last year's Bristol. Damn, them Penske boys can cheat...DRIVE!. I mean DRIVE! Rusty is due a win here at Charlotte. Get's close with a second.

Geoffrey Bodacious last re-runable was Watkins Glen in '96. Not worth the videotape. But saw plenty of old mid 80's footage of him. Way back in his Levi Garrett car. Way back in the days he had hair. The #60 powers to a 20th.

Juan Montalban is destroyin' these boys and girls in a ho-hummmer. Back in....30.

Back...

Michael's only win was his sandbaggin' of the Winston years ago. It's booked to be re-run in August.....2005. He bags a 27th.

Pick a year. Mark Martin hasn't finished lower than 7th at Charlotte in 5 years. But then again, Mark said that last week's wreck was his best car. This week's wreck finishes 10th.

And Ward? Ward has only two wins to look up. One this year. And a dustcovered 1995 copy on 16mm film....You can save your tape. An 8th.

Oh it's down to the wire now. 20 laps to go at Indy. 10 minutes to Charlotte. Gotta get set for a 3 minute intermission and beer run.

Eh. Juan Man-o-war has this thing in the bag.........Unless he run's outta gas.

Hey, ABC...Roll tape.