Hello old friend. It's really good to see you once again. When you think about a band that was as successful as the Beatles were, you realize that the marketing for them must have been amazing. Amazing it was. In fact, there were so many ideas for shirts, movies, and albums that their management simply could not market all of them. Well lucky we are as tonight I reveal to you some rejected ideas for a few of these Beatles CD's/DVD's. It's a segment I like to call "I Hate Anthony Anderson Because He Relies On The Fact That He's A Fat Black Person To Make Anything He Does Funny" or IHAABHROTFTHAFBPTMAHDF for short.
Splendid. Now the reason I'm showing these Beatles albums to you is because I found that a lot of them are actually really good ideas. Some of them seem like they'd sell like wicked mad crazy. It's a shame they were never actually put out for sale, but we can dream, can't we? Or at least I can, I really don't care about you.
The first package idea is a CD/DVD combo. A lot of people were upset with how the new version of Let It Be still doesn't do the album any justice. The marketing people had another idea to release Let It Be again under a new name. It's Let It Be....With A Vengeance.
This version would be very similar to the original. A lot of the songs would sound the same except every now and then there'd be a sound file of a monkey yelping or a violently screaming human getting some part of their body brutally cut off or something to that effect. It really enhances the sound and of course it would all be digitally re-re-mastered.
But the gem of this package is the DVD. A lot of it would be very similar to the Let It Be movie except it has bonus scenes, like during the Rooftop Concert when Giant Val Kilmer stopped by.
The next package idea is also a CD/DVD combo. It contains completely unreleased material and has a very catchy title.
The CD and DVD of "The Beatles: We Fucked Up" are together a two hour video archive and the soundtrack that goes along with it. All it would be is two solid hours of clips of the Beatles yelling at cursing at each other. Just the worse possible clips of them that people can dig up. To fill space, there'd probably be shots of them going to the bathroom or footage of them yelling at the paparazzi and telling them to leave them alone. That'd rule, I'd totally buy that.
And then of course my favorite. I have no idea how this one didn't make it through. It's a CD that contains great Beatles classics but management just never caught on.
Well that's all I have for you tonight, kindly folks! Until the next time I decide to make another page that only a certain demographic can relate to: remember to drive safely and hold on to that rainbow.
