Red Shirt Diaries

By : J. Helios

 

       “I’m a red-shirt and I’ll die if I want to

       Dye if I want to, die if I have to

       You’d die too if this happened to you…”

 

Lieutenant John Doe’s personal log, 14 days since arrival on Starship Enterprise

       Had a run-in with a few Klingons. Got trampled underfoot. Still alive.

 

17 days since arrival on Starship Enterprise

       Organians very weird. Still alive.

 

22 days

       Medical examination with Crabby doctor.

 

30 days

       Beamed down with Capt. Kirk to planet’s surface. First away team mission and I was excited. Started sweating when I realized I was the only non-senior officer to go.

 

30 days, 2 hours, 16 minutes since arrival on Starship Enterprise.

       Dying on transporter pad after running away from belligerent natives. If doctor McCoy, says ‘He’s Dead Jim’ one more time I’ll…

 

       “He’s dead Jim.”

 

Lieutenant Joe Nobody’s Personal Log, 2 days since arrival.

       I’m a musician, not really a good officer. Just drifted here for hecks sake. Besides, chicks dig uniforms. Hell, it’s a RED uniform.

 

3 days since arrival

       Note to self, don’t pinch Head Nurse and call her ‘sweetcakes’ on first day. She might withhold necessary painkillers for the phaser burns sustained after away mission. Ow….

 

5 days

       New planet discovered. Have to beam down with several other no namers. The class we had on ‘duties’ and the lecture on ‘necessary sacrifices’ run through my head again.

 

5 days, 7 hours, 15 minutes since arrival on Starship Enterprise

       Shot down by some guy with a vendetta against Capt. Kirk. Darnit. I didn’t even get to hit on the Communications Officer yet.

 

Author’s Notes : This is still ongoing as I am still thinking up of stuff. Suggestions and submissions are very much encouraged. All hailing frequencies are open at [email protected] and at [email protected]

 

 

 

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