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Part 24 - This Way As much as I want us to talk this over and decide what this is, I'm still a little apprehensive about it. I sit on the bottom edge of my bed, practically guarding the bathroom door, waiting on him exiting. Waiting for the talk. I glance at my watch; it's been 3 minutes and 24 seconds since I heard the shower stop running, the butterflies in my stomach getting more intense with each passing look at my watch. 4 minutes now. I hear someone laugh as they walk past the door of my dorm and then I hear the lock on the bathroom door being opened. By the time he's opened the door and taken a step into the room, I've gotten up from the bed and am standing a few feet away from him. love be still We both look at each other for a second before blurting out at the same time. “We need to talk.” We both smile at each other and I wonder if we're both going to say the same thing. If we both want the same thing. “Before we say anything I need to…” I say taking a step forward, not finishing as I lightly brush my lips against his. At first he's unresponsive as I gently suck on his lower lip, bringing my hand up to gently stroke his cheek. ‘I want this one moment to be the happy end if we don't want the same thing, the moment I want to remember'. I feel his hand over mine on his cheek and we break the kiss. “I had to…” I begin but stop not sure if I should voice what I'm thinking, will he understand? He raises an eyebrow questioningly, urging me to continue but I don't. “You had to what?” I just look at him for a moment. I want to remember how he looks at this exact moment. His hair a little spiked, the grey t-shirt he wears showing a hint of what I know lies underneath it, the trace of stubble, as well as the hint of a smile that adorns his face. I want to remember how I feel right now: the butterflies, the ache in my tummy, the tingle that runs down my spine, how his skin feels against mine. say that you'll stay “If whatever this is or was is ending, I want it to have been with that kiss. I want this now…” I gesture between us with my hand. “…to be the picture I have of us in my mind, the moment it's over. Not some memory of an ugly fight or disagreement.” “Is this gonna end up in a fight?” “I hope not. We have decide what this is, what we want.” He looks down at the hand he still has in his for a moment before laying his eyes on mine again. “And what exactly is this Jo?” I know it's not just sex! “You know what it is!” I tell him, my voice low as his eyes search out mine as though he's looking for the answer in them. “Do you want it to be over?” He asks and my eyes waver from his for a moment as I bite my lip. I know I'm so close to laying it all on the line. I don't answer his question, somehow there's this small part of me still afraid to say it. What if he doesn't want what I want? “There's something happening between us!” He doesn't answer, there's no reply, not even in his eyes. He's just waiting for me to tell him, to say what I hope he wants to hear. What I know I have to say. “There's this part of me that wants to tell you that what happened…doesn't change anything. That things can go back to how they were…” I get afraid “I think that we're beyond the point where this won't change anything. It's gonna change something no matter where all this goes.” I nod my head in agreement. “My instinct is telling me to say ‘it doesn't', but I know for a fact that it's not true. It's changed everything. Everything changed the moment we entered my dorm. The exact moment I kissed you.” “Do you want it to be over?” He asks his question again. I feel tears start to form and wonder if he's aware of the small movement of my head as I shake it a little from side to side. “Jo?” He needs to hear the words. I still shake my head. “No! I don't want us to be over.” I pause for a moment, letting it sink in. I actually said it. “I want us to be together. Friendship isn't enough, it has never been enough.” He runs his free hand through his hair and I suddenly feel drawn to his lips, a feeling that is not altogether lost on me. I glance from his eyes to his lips and back again, closing the space there is between us. say that you'll stay I have one quick glance at his lips again before locking my eyes on his for a moment, closing them only as my lips come into contact with his. The kiss is gentle, and I hope that it tells him this is really what I want. My lips glide with his as he laces his fingers through mine while I bring my free hand up to caress his cheek. I feel myself falling further and further into him, never wanting to break the kiss. Why can't I spend the rest of my life like this? Eternity even? Joined to him at the lips. But I can't. Our lips continue their dance for a moment longer before we both have to stop to catch our breaths, my forehead resting on his. Or maybe his rests on mine, who can really tell? We're both smiling though. Maybe that means he wants the same thing too. “I have so much to say.” I tell him, turning around and dragging him towards my bed for us to finally have the talk. don't move “Ah Jo, I thought we were gonna talk.” He says and I turn to see the serious look on his face. “You think we're gonna…?” “Why are you dragging me towards you bed?” “So we can sit down.” I tell him rolling my eyes as we sit down. “This isn't all about sex you know Dawson , we're more than sex!” “I know that.” He replies before capturing my bottom lip with his and sucking gently on it. “It was making love, not sex! But now…now we have to talk.” say that you'll stay “ Dawson , do you mind if I go first? I want to go first - - again, except this time I will be totally honest with you. I know I wasn't last week, I know I haven't been for a while now.” “Okay.” My glance moves to our intertwined fingers momentarily, he has started to lightly stroke my wrist with the thumb from his free hand, such a tender move. So Dawson . That one motion is enough to remind me of how much I lo…love him. It's like those three words have suddenly hit me, yet I've known it all along at the same time and now I am not afraid to feel it, maybe even express it. It's like suddenly the knowledge gives me a newfound confidence. “These past few days have been amazing; we've both seen a side of each other we haven't seen with each other in a while. Actually I don't think… No! I know I haven't felt like this with anyone else.” I smile at him as I reach over to my desk for a scrunchie, he lets go of my hand as I tie my hair back. don't move “I feel like I've seen a new side to you…a new side to me even.” He reaches for my hand again and I pause, looking at our hands again, smiling at him. “Exploring this new side to us: talking about anything and everything, well within reason, sharing new things - - the love making…the intimacy, all the things I always knew I wanted in a relationship.” I lightly chuckle as I continue. “The only thing is we weren't in a romantic relationship at the time, who knows maybe we still won't…” “Don't even think that!” He demands and I can't help smiling as he affirms where he is in this. “I can't remember when the last time was that I felt that I was completely honest with you, when I felt that you truly knew everything there was to know about me. When there were no boundaries on how we acted with each other. These past few months I've acted like I was fine with everything.” I shake my head. “But I'm not and I haven't been for sometime. I thought I had to act a certain way around you, that I had to put my feelings aside…” I trail off as I suddenly start to feel free for being so honest but there's so much more to come and I'm not sure it can all be said now. “Joey?” He says as I feel him lightly stroke my cheek with the thumb that was stroking my wrist. “Hmm...” “Why are you crying?” I hadn't even realized there were tears flowing from my eyes. I look away from him for a moment. “I'm sorry.” “For what?” He asks perplexed. “Everything and nothing.” He still wears that look of confusion. “I wanted to hate you for shutting me out when Mitch died because I was hurting too. I wanted to help you, be there for you and you wouldn't let me. I guess I should have tried harder because it wasn't your fault. I guess history just proves that it's impossible for me to hate you.” I pause as I wipe fresh tears from my face, my eyes never really wavering from his now blurry face. “I'm sorry for everything. For dumping you and running to Jack, blaming you for splitting up my family - - I know that wasn't your doing it was Dad's. For what happened with Pacey, it was never meant to hurt you - - to hurt any of us. I was just confused about my feelings, they were so strong…you know? All you try to do is resist, try to rebel. How can you fight something so powerful?” What does he think of all of this, goes through my head as I let that question linger, the tears still flowing. “It's always been you! It's always been us!” I reassure him with a smile. Part 25 - Silent Partners “Hey Jack”! I call as I push my way through the crowd and he turns, leaning on the bar. “ Dawson ! Hi, how was your trip?” “Good, definitely good. Where's everybody else?” I ask after a quick glance around. “She's not here!” He replies with a grin. “Pacey told me earlier that she…” He cocks an eyebrow at me. “I think Pacey had other things on his mind earlier, or shall I say, someone else.” I look at him with an enquiring look and wait on him to elaborate but he just turns back to the bar as someone snakes their arms around my waist and purrs, “How about it Tiger?” “Actually, the names Dawson .” I reply, turning to face Audrey. She pouts. “Aw you are no fun!” Then she hugs me. “How's my fave director?” “Last I heard he was doing pretty good. How my fave LA girl?” “Don't ask! I went home for a few days and let's just say I wish I hadn't bothered.” “Sorry to hear that!” I glance around again, wondering where she is. “Where is everybody else?” “Pacey's now at the bar helping Jack and avoiding me for a few cuz I just whipped his ass at pool. Jack…” “You play pool?” “I'm quite the shark, Pacey just learned that and in a bad way, sooooooooo many people watching.” She finishes laughing. I join her. “He didn't take it too well?” “Nah, he was muttering stuff as he walked away from me, something about something being unbelievable. Pacey as I said, is at the bar, Jack is at the bar and our girl will be up next!” “Our…?” She cuts me off. “Ohhhh, cute guy at 2 o'clock!” Then she wanders off. Okay, who is our girl? Why isn't Jen here? And why does that guy keep looking at me like that? Wait, is it a guy? “Yo Dawson , over here!” I hear Pacey over the crowd and music and see he's located a table and is now saying something to make Audrey laugh. Or maybe she's laughing at his crappy pool playing. As I reach the table I hear the resident band starting to play on stage behind us. “Where's Jen?” I finally ask over the music, really needing to talk to her. “She was called into the station.” Audrey replies. “You missed not seeing her this weekend?” I am about to answer her when I suddenly become aware of the voice of the person singing with the band. “…we have to steal our kisses, when nobody's around, we have to hide the tenderness inside, to make love on the sly, you say it's for the better…we have to speak in riddles, to cloth the things we say…” Turning in my seat I see Joey on stage, sitting on a bar stool, microphone in hand, singing. I had absolutely no idea she'd be here. We'd agreed to see each other in a few days, make sure we still felt the same…give me a chance to speak to Jen. Only reason I'm here is because Pacey said she'd be here. “…when they see us together, so we're living like silent partners, sneaking like thieves in the night, can't let it show, gotta keep it low, so no one knows, but silent partners…” “What's Joey doing up there?” I ask, turning to Pacey and Audrey as Jack takes his seat. Pacey rolls his eyes. “I believe she's singing.” Duh! I want to reply but don't. “Is this a regular thing?” Audrey nods her head. “We do this every week!” “We?” “Don't worry, you haven't missed my performance!” “So what's it going to be tonight?” Jack asks her as I go back to listening to Joey. “…keep the secret burning on our lips, we'd both be hurting someone if they caught us here like this…” I actually flinch at the words, knowing how true it is and how much I care for Jen. “…knowing our affair just can't go on forever, and like silent partners, sneaking like thieves in the night…” The words are totally appropriate to our situation. We can't continue like this…someone will only end up getting hurt. Her smile falters for a moment as her eyes focus in on me. I guess she's surprised I'm here too. Then she smiles and it's like she's singing to me. “…it'll never be right whatever we do, you need me too much and I'm just not giving up you…” She closes her eyes as the music continues and I feel someone wrap their arms around me from behind. “Heeeeeey! Did you miss me?” Jen asks, before laying her lips on mine and for a brief moment I'm torn by what to do. But I do what I'm expected to do and kiss her back. Then she hugs me again. “Damn, I missed Joey.” She says and pouts, which is totally adorable. “Now isn't that just what you wanted to hear Dawson ?” Jack says as Jen places an arm around us both. “You're gone for the weekend yet she missed Joey.” “Funny Jack, now shhhhhhhhh…I wanna hear the rest!” I automatically place my arm loosely around her waist and look up to see Joey's eyes on us again, her smile faltering for a second time. “…no one knows we're silent partners, are we ever gonna come to the light, it'll never be right whatever we do, you need me too much and I'm just not giving up, silent partners…” I suddenly feel like Ross in Friends, when he's with Julie but kisses Rachel and someone sings about it. Except it's different. It's not just a kiss and they're friends. Boy this is really going to be a fun night now. “…we're silent partners, are we ever gonna come to the light, can't let it show, gotta keep it low, so no one know we're silent partners…” Then the song is over, Jen's arm is no longer around me as she is clapping and cheering with the others. All I can do is join in and try not to think of how awkward this is going to be. Part 26 - The Highwayman Alas he was the highwayman "Hey Joey!" Audrey exclaims as she comes backstage, probably to get ready to sing her song soon. "Did you see who just saw your performance?" She doesn't even give me the chance to answer, and just rattles on. " Dawson ! He never even knew we came here, that we did this. I can't believe you never told him." "I just didn't think it was something that was newsworthy." I reply, my tone slightly on the defensive, why? I don't quite understand. And she in all her magic "I'll speak with ya in a few Joey, I think my bladder's gonna burst." She walks off shaking her head and muttering something about can't a guy tell the difference between water and lemonade. As I'm about to emerge from backstage to meet the others I catch sight of something I'm not completely prepared for. Her lips had just grazed his and she laughs playfully and touches his nose. And he in all his glory I feel the need to gasp for breath, as though I'm suddenly suffocating. Watching them, watching her arm go around his waist. She leans her head against his arm and she smiles at him and he smiles back. It's all so familiar. The looks, the gestures and probably even the words they are saying to one another. For a moment the disbelief takes over from the shock, how dare he! But then the jealousy starts to course through my veins again. How I always thought she was prettier than I was. Always thought he was so unattainable. Maybe that's how it should be; after all they've somehow found their way back to one another. That insecurity that has always been there rushes back all so suddenly. What if I'm not good enough? And she wonders is this real I shake my head a little, try and snap myself out of this…feeling, wondering if it'll be at all possible to make a quick getaway without them seeing. But the only way out of here is passed their table. With my hands in the pocket of my jeans I begin to trudge over towards their table, but I spot what looks to me to be a quasi-intimate, flirty type moment between Jen and Dawson. Well judging by her movements, at least, because he kind of has his back to me. One of his elbows is propped on the table and he has his head slightly tilted to the side. She smiles up at him, that beaming smile of hers as she laces her fingers in his. And then he sees her coming "Sickening, isn't it?" A familiar voice says from beside me as an arm goes around me. I turn to see that Pacey's eyes looking in the same direction mine was. "Just a little." I spit back at him knowing too well how he'll soon be starting on how he can tell I have a thing for Dawson again. Was I always that transparent? "It makes you wish you had that too, doesn't it?" And she... out in the distance I open my mouth to reply but for some reason the words. "I don't wish I had Dawson " won't seem to form in my mouth, so instead I just glare at him. "I never meant it in that capacity Joey." He rolls his eyes. "I've known you long enough to know that if it were the case you wouldn't admit it and least of all to me. What I meant was that it makes you wish you had someone." "Yeah." I reply my voice quiet as I look back towards Dawson and Jen, both of whom have now turned to wave in my direction. And she wonders is this real "Hey Joey!" Jen exclaims somewhat excited to see me. She seems too chirpy, I guess that's because she's now seeing Dawson again. "I tried calling you the other night, but I think you were probably at the library." "Yeah." I agree with her not quite able to look either her or Dawson in the eye. "I'll catch up with you in a second." She says before turning to Pacey. "You come with me, there's someone I need to introduce you to." A dream as the thunder wakes her All of a sudden Dawson and I are alone in a room full of people, and all of a sudden I don't know exactly what to say. "Joey, I didn't know you were going to be here or…" "It's okay Dawson ." I interrupt. "You weren't supposed to know." "I haven't had the chance to talk to Jen yet. I only got here as you were about to go onstage." "I wasn't expecting everything to be done and dusted so quickly. Maybe we should take a bit of a break from hanging around each other until…well, until you've decided what to do." Today and still today they ride "I already have decided, didn't you hear me?" He asks placing his hand on mine. "I just haven't gotten the chance to talk to Jen yet." "Are you sure about this?" I ask him as I bite my lip. "I'm not trying to back out or anything, it just seems a little…sudden and I don't want you to feel like I'm making you rush to make a decision. I know what she means to you." "She does mean a lot to me Joey, but the reasons we started dating again were all wrong." I smile back at him and that feeling of uneasiness that I had starts to subside. "I'll speak with her as soon as I can." He says as we make our way back to the table where everyone was seated at before. Part 27 - Anticipating It's been about thirty minutes since I told Joey I had made a choice, now I just have to work out how I am going to tell Jen. I don't want to hurt her but is there any way to do this that won't do that. Joey and Audrey sit chatting away; I guess Audrey is filling Joey in on her visit with her parents. Jack is off chatting up a guy I think, Jen's talking with someone from the radio station and Pacey has disappeared. “Did either of you two notice where Pacey went?” I ask Joey and Audrey, interrupting them for a moment. “Not a clue.” Joey offers. “I don't know where he is, who said I knew?” Audrey replies. “No one.” I reply puzzled. “I asked if you knew where he was.” “Sorry, I don't!” Joey and I exchange puzzled looks. “Okay.” I reply. “Maybe he's gone through to where the dance floor is.” Joey offers. “Either of you two in the mood for some dancing?” “Sure.” Audrey replies and she grabs my hand as she gets off of her seat. “I never said Yeah Audrey.” “But we both know you were going too!” As we enter the dance area Joey seems to get excited about a song that is playing and grabs my hand. top down, on the strip "Come on. I want to dance." She says dragging me towards the dance floor. As we move away from Audrey I hear her call something to me, but I can't quite make out what she says. I turn my head towards Audrey to see her pointing at an unoccupied table before turning back to Joey as we reach the dance floor. She lets go of my hand and I just look at her questioningly, wondering what has come over her. "I love this song." Is her reply. "It just makes me want to dance." skip on the drinks She starts to sway her hips and I suddenly feel uncomfortable. It's not the dancing with Joey that causes the discomfort; it's the dancing in general. But then I just look at her and how happy she looks. I'll be anticipating She's dancing with her eyes closed and smiles as she continues to sway her hips. I just try to mimic her actions. She opens her eyes to see me watching her every move and she sticks her tongue out at me. Then she grins when I laugh. Joey takes one of my hands and places it on her hip as she steps closer to me. A strand of her hair falls down in front of her face and on impulse; I move my other hand to put it behind her ear. step up baby don't be shy I move one finger lightly from her ear and trace her jaw line. All at once I want to kiss her but...I really can't. I lean down to her ear and tell her, "I really have this desire to kiss you right now!" The scene shifts to Audrey sitting at the table watching Dawson and Joey dance; she is soon joined by Pacey. move it baby over here we can get down "Is it just me or do those two look as though they were born to move together? Their movements just look so natural...innate even" Audrey said as she watched Dawson and Joey on the dance floor. Pacey turned in his seat to watch them. "It's nice that they can seem so at ease with one another." "Why wouldn't they be at ease?" I'll be anticipating "I just figured with their history that they were doomed to...I don't know; feel awkward whenever the other was involved with someone else." Pacey replied turning back to Audrey. It went unseen by everyone else but Dawson 's lips gently grazed Joey's cheek as he finished saying something to her. "You think that something has changed that?" Pacey shrugged his shoulders. "Maybe they've accepted that they'll never be together." Everyone also failed to notice that one of Joey's hands was under Dawson 's shirt, resting on his ass in his back pocket. "Or...maybe they've accepted that now is just not the time for them!" The scene shifts back to Dawson and Joey dancing. I wanna rock with you (rock with you) gotta really let me know if you want me Joey stops the little dance routine that she was in the middle of doing and dances closer to me. Then she tip toes and starts to whisper in my ear the words to the part of the song that is playing. "Gotta really let me know if you want me, you gotta turn me on and make me feel sexy, gotta show me you got everything that I need." Before she starts to dance again she lightly pinches me on the cheek and says, "Can you do that?" "I can but try." I reply. "I take it that means that I haven't done any of this already?" She just raises an eyebrow and tilts her head slightly, smiling. "We'll just have to practice perfecting that then." oh whoa yeah " Dawson Leery. Are you propositioning me?" She says raising an eyebrow. Joey then turns around to dance with her back to me, turning her head slightly so that she can still see me. "That all depends." I say as she starts to shake her butt at me, while raising one of her hands above her head, shaking her whole body. Cut back to Pacey and Audrey at the table. let's do this tonite "I must say though, they are certainly trying to outdo one another at the flirting." Pacey said. "Who?" Jen said as Audrey and Pacey turned to see her and Jack approach with some drinks. “Um, Dawson and Joey.” Pacey replies not noticing the semi-glare Audrey as thrown at him. Cut to Joey and Dawson. I wanna rock with you gotta really let me know if you want me "Depends on what?" She asks. I move forward and place my hands on her hips, swaying with her. "On whether you want to be propositioned." She turns to face me again and laughs. "By you...well okay then, since Mr. wonderful mystery man doesn't seem to be doing anything for me." I just laugh. "Hey, it's not my fault that he's not that great." "Oh but he is." She says as the song finishes and we make our way back to the table. Part 28 - *Feeling Alive* An hour later we're still at the club, Jen is talking animatedly to the guy Jack was chatting up earlier (I think his name was Richard) about something at the radio station. I try to concentrate on what she's saying and ignoring how Joey keeps rubbing against my side as she talks to Jack about one of his classes. Suddenly Joey turns to me and whispers in my ear. “I want to go home,” as Jack turns to the guy and Jen to hear what they're saying. “You don't suppose…” She begins, this time her breast brushes past my arm as she places her glass back on the table. “Does anyone know where Audrey went?” Joey suddenly asks and everyone looks around as though they hadn't even realized she wasn't here. “I haven't seen her in a while come to mention it.” Jen replies. “Didn't she say she was going to the bathroom?” “Yeah.” Jack replies. “Anyone see where Pacey went to?” “He went outside with some girl.” Richard replies. “Wasn't she supposed to be leaving with you?” Jack asked. “Yeah.” Before anyone replied Jen blurted out, “Damn it, I left my purse at the radio station.” She turns to Jack. “You wouldn't be a pal and come and get it with me, would you?” Jack looks from Jen and Richard to Joey and me. “Um, sure.” “Good.” Jen replied. “That way Dawson could walk Joey home. Maybe Audrey got lucky.” “Maybe.” Joey agreed, not really looking Jen in the eye. She'd been like that all night. Trying to avoid standing close to Jen, trying not to talk to her. Me, on the other hand. I was finding it hard to talk to both Joey and Jen just because I didn't like the whole situation. Don't get me wrong, I do want to be with Joey but I hate how this has come about. And I don't want to hurt Jen, but staying with her now…it's not really an option. I watch her for a second as she puts her jacket on. She's grown so well, one would hardly recognize the girl from the big city. And in a way I do love Jen, it's just that it's in a friendly way. Add to that the fact that we got together for the wrong reasons, or I know I did anyway. Is it going to be that easy to end though? “I'll see you back at Grams.” Jen says as she leans up to kiss me. “I'll wait on Jack finishing his drink.” “Okay.” I reply as I start towards the way out and I hear Joey behind me saying her goodbyes. Once outside the club I wait for Joey, she must have got caught up saying goodnight to Jen and Jack. After a few minutes, Joey emerges from the doorway and sighs. “I thought they were never gonna let me leave.” She tells me as we head in the direction of her dorm. “They were starting in on the third degree about who I was with earlier.” “So Jack did tell everyone?” I ask and she just nods. “Did you really expect him to not say anything after catching the saintly Joey Potter in that position.” She scowls at me. “Trust you to be the lucky one!” I raise an eyebrow at her and add, “In more ways than one.” “Very funny.” Joey replies, mock laughing. “For some reason they think I was with Pacey and I couldn't stop laughing at that. I don't know if they think that was cause I was trying to cover but they wouldn't tell me why they thought that. My face went scarlet though.” “I wonder why they never said anything to me.” “Oh I'm sure they will. They'll want to try and get as much mileage out of this as possible. I have a feeling they haven't told Audrey yet, given she never said anything earlier and that's how they'll plan to get it out of me.” I laugh nervously. “What would we have done if it had been the other way about?” “I think some sort of fight would have ensued.” There's a moment of silence as we both think about what she said. “We won't be able to tell anyone.” I say as we approach her building. She nervously bites her bottom lip. “I know. I thought about that and…” She trails off, putting her hands in her jacket pockets. “Maybe we should wait until we're inside.” I nod in agreement; she's worried something might be said now that could lead to us having a fight. “Do you have class tomorrow?” I ask as a way to keep some form of conversation going, a desperate attempt for us to not fall into an awkward silence. “Yeah. I have class all morning.” “What time are you starting at?” “8:30.” “Where do you suppose Audrey went to?” “I have no idea.” She says looking at me and then she shrugs. “She could be in bed already, I just wish she had told us she was leaving.” We walk the rest of the way in silence, both of us stealing what we hope are quick glances of the other when really we both know we're doing it and not disguising it very well. As we approach Joey dorm room, Joey removes her key from her pocket. “Maybe I should just…” I begin, not really wanting to finish that sentence. She still has the ability to read me so well. “Do you really want that?” She asks as she unlocks the door and enters her empty dorm, knowing that the last word was going to be ‘go.' “We both know I can't stay.” I tell her as I lean against the doorframe, not wanting to enter in case we start something we can't finish. Tonight I feel like I've died, “When I told you I wanted to come home, I wasn't under any illusions that you would be spending the night.” Is her reply as she takes off her jacket and hangs it over a chair. “If anything I was hoping we'd just talk…” She trails off and I finally enter the room. “And you would check that I wasn't going to back out?” I finish for her as I close the door. “Something like that.” Joey answers as she removes her shoes. “I can tell you now; it's not easy seeing you with Jen. Knowing what you two get up to, it's not all innocent.” “I already told you that since we…” I gesture between us. “We haven't.” “If you don't want this then okay, I can leave things and we can pretend they never happened.” “I already told you that's not what I want.” “Did you really think it over though?” So look me in the eye and say it's wrong, “What do you think I've been thinking about ever since this started?” I ask her as I take off my jacket. Does she really think I haven't given this any thought? “I just wonder if maybe you need more time to think this over. That you shouldn't rush to make a decision, you stay with Jen for now and…” “How many times do I have to say it?” I cut her off. “I don't want to be with Jen.” “Don't say it unless you mean it.” “I want to be with you!” “Really?” She asks and by this time we're standing so close we're almost touching. “You're sure?” She asks again as she places her hands on my hips. It's late and I'm growing tired of repeating the same answers only to have her ask again. So I answer in a different way, by kissing her. One of my hands on the small of her back, the other in her hair. She starts to pull my shirt out of my trousers and as we continue to kiss she guides me over to the bed. Then once the kiss is broken Joey motions for me to sit down and she walks over to the door, locking it. Well there's something she just won't let go Once I'm seated I just watch her walk back towards me as she pulls her T-shirt over her head. She starts to unbutton her jeans as one of her straps falls down off of her shoulder and all of a sudden I feel totally aroused. She slips out of her trousers, now only wearing her bra and thong as she stands before me. She leans down and places one hand on my cheek as she starts to suckle on my bottom lip before she places her knees on the bed on either side of me. She reaches behind her back and undoes the clasp on her bra, removes the straps and tosses it over her shoulder before devouring my lips with her own. Look me in the eye and say it's wrong, Tell me that these feelings won't go on oh no The kiss is broken and we just look at one another for a moment, mine a look of awe as it seems she's totally been transformed on hearing I want to be with her. She takes my hands and places them on her ass as she grinds her hips against mine, causing things to go a little hazy as a moan escapes both of our lips. ***** Cause tonight, I'm before him now, almost naked. Yet I don't feel self-conscious and I wonder if he senses there's been a change. I start to undo the buttons on his shirt and he just watches me, his eyes never leaving mine as he caresses my ass. Once his shirt is unbuttoned, I push it off of his shoulders and down his arms before running one hand back up his arm, tracing his jaw line. I wrap my arms tightly around his neck, and kiss him hungrily, relishing the feel of his naked chest against my breasts. We're both breathless when the kiss is broken and I rest my forehead against his for a moment. I want to remember this moment forever, the time I give myself to him knowing we're really together. So look me in the eye and say it's wrong, I stand and pull at his hand, indicating for him to stand and once we're both on our feet I lean up and kiss him again. This time the kiss is gentle, much like the way I kissed him at the train station, one hand resting on his cheek, the other clasped in his hand. Before I let go of his hand, I bring it up to my lips, gently kissing the palm before placing it back at his side and letting go. I remove my thong quickly before I start to undo the buttons and zipper on his jeans and he starts to nibble on my ear while he lightly strokes the small of my back. I crouch down and remove his socks and shoes and moments later his jeans lie in a heap on the floor along with his boxers. We both stand naked now, our eyes locked once again and I see it in his eyes he understands how this is different. Understands what this means. ***** Cause tonight, I understand this all feels different; we're finally a couple. I make the first move by taking one of her hands in mine, while I run the other down her side before I lift her up and carry her the few steps to her bed. I lay her down on the bed and quickly follow suit, rolling onto my side, slightly leaning over Joey's body as I kiss her again. The kiss is soft, sweet and sensuous as we reacquaint ourselves with the feel and taste of each other. Joey's lips part and I suck on her bottom lip, while sliding my tongue along it at the same time. She deepens the kiss and her tongue enters my mouth, brushes against my own, as she runs a hand through my hair. Joey pulls me on top of her and I just revel in the feeling of our naked bodies pressed together. ***** For this love to survive, Once he's on top of me I break the kiss and start to lay butterfly kisses from his lips to his ear before sucking on his lobe. I feel his erection press against one of my thighs as he lightly strokes the other with his thumb. His breath catches in his throat as my leg brushes against his erect penis. I shift my leg again and place my hands on his hips as I stop sucking on his ear. Dawson kisses me gently and we look in one another's eyes for a moment as we listen to each other breathe, his erection rubbing against me, ready to penetrate to my core. I bite my bottom lip in anticipation and then he speaks. “Are you sure you want this?” Such a simple question, and for me it only has one answer. I could tell him no and he'd just leave, never force anything. His main priority is my being ok. “More than anything.” I reply with a smile. He watches me as he starts to fill me up and I try to keep my eyes open while I adjust. I lean up and kiss him gently; thrusting my hips against his and within a second he has started to move his hips against mine, almost withdrawing from me fully before pushing back in. ***** I start off slowly, pushing in and pulling out but it's not long before Joey starts to moan softly which serves to make me want her to moan louder. I thrust deeper, faster. I place my lips on hers again, moaning her name into her mouth as she increases the rate at which her hips thrust against my own, until they're moving in time. We're practically slamming onto each other, our breathing becoming ragged. We stop kissing and she moves her hands to my shoulders, lightly digging her fingernails into me, indicating she's almost there. So am I. She throws her head back against the pillow, her pelvis still rising to meet mine. A few thrusts later and I feel her inner muscles clench around my erection. “ Dawson !” She calls out as she lets go, pleasure sweeping through her. Hearing her utter my name in this way is enough to send me hurtling over the edge. I push into her again. “Jo!” The only word escaping my lips as I spill into her. I fall on top of her, crushing her against the bed as we both try to catch our breaths, our loving making somewhat different this time…almost spiritual. She wraps her arms around my back, kissing my shoulder as I move off of her and we lay in silence, stealing kisses as we catch our breath. After ten minutes or so of silent kisses she whispers in my ear. “Little did you know you were gonna be getting lucky once you walked me home.” I chuckle. “I'm starting to wonder if this was all part of Joey Potter's master plan, you lured me her under false pretenses just to seduce me.” “Well now that you mention it Dawson …” She trails off as I tickle her and she screams. “I should kill you for that!” She says glaring at me while trying not to laugh. “Do you have it in you though?” I ask her as I bring my face closer to hers. “Well you see Dawson ,” She begins as I stop tickling her and she kisses me quickly. “I don't know if I could do it.” She finishes and I pull her closer to me so I can devour her lips with my own. I pull her on top of me and she wraps her arms around me as the kiss becomes more hungry and my erection brushes against her thigh and a moan escapes my lips. She breaks the kiss. “Again Dawson ?” She asks as she cocks an eyebrow suggestively before she changes her position. And just as she's about to start her journey on that downward slope it appears someone has the worst timing ever. We hear Audrey giggling in the hallway and I'm pretty certain we both must be looking at each other like deer caught in headlights. But neither of us is fazed for very long as Joey makes a mad dash for her dressing gown, while I try to gather my clothes together. We hear Audrey trying to get her key in the door and Joey grabs my arm and opens her closet, pushing me inside. “You have 60 seconds to get those on.” She says as she throws my other shoe beside my feet before closing her closet door. I try to dress quickly and quietly while trying to hear if Audrey is in the dorm yet. She is. She can't stop giggling and I don't think Joey sounds too amused but I can't make out what is being said. I have my boxer shorts and jeans on and am about to pull my t-shirt over my head when she yanks the door open. “You have to go now.” She whispers. “Audrey's in the bathroom.” “Give me a sec.” I tell her as I pull the shirt over my head and she bends down and grabs my shoes. “No time, you'll have to put these on in the hallway.” She says as she ushers me towards the door, while handing me my jacket. “Jo?” I say questioningly. She glances down the way, sees the obvious bulge in my jeans. “I'm sorry Dawson , but you have to go.” She opens the dorm room door, pushes me out while throwing my shoes after me. I turn and just look at her questioningly. She rolls her eyes at me, pulls me by the t-shirt towards her, kisses me quickly and pushes me away again. “I guess my first act as your girlfriend is gonna have to be making up for this…somehow.” She finishes cocking an eyebrow. “Guess you'll just have to walk your dog when you get home.” She says as she closes the door. “Bye bye.” I am not amused, yet at the same time I am. “Someone's got a lot to make up for.” I say to the empty hallway as I set about putting my shoes on. Part 29 - Everybody's changing Scampering to pick my clothes off of the floor I hope Audrey didn't hear Dawson leave. She's bound to figure this out sooner or later, I only hope it's after Dawson has broken up with Jen; after we're ready to tell people we're dating. I quickly find some pajamas and put them on, wondering what is taking Audrey so long. Straightening up the bed I hear her exit the bathroom. "Joey?" "Yeah." "There's something I have to tell you." Audrey begins as she steps further into our room. "And I'm not sure if you're going to be mad or not and if you are I'm fully prepared for that, well maybe not fully prepared but well." "Audrey?" I interrupt. "You're rambling." "Sorry." "What is it you have to tell me?" I ask as I sit down on my bed and she follows my cue and sits on hers. "We're friends right?" She asks and I have no idea were she's going. "Yeah." I reply confused. "And friends are honest with one another, right?" There must be confusion written all over my face and for a moment I start to wonder if she knows about Dawson and I and she's about to tell me she knows. Why is there a need to know if we're friends though? Oh right, maybe it's so I will entrust her with the secret. "Audrey about…" I begin but she cuts me off. "There's no easy way for me to say this, so I'm just gonna say it." Audrey pauses, takes a deep breathe and blurts out. "I've been seeing Pacey." "Huh?" Totally not what I thought she was going to say. She continues. "I know you guys used to date but things just happened, it wasn't planned or anything. I wasn't sure how to tell you or how you'll react or how it'll change our friendship but I had to tell you because it's been killing me seeing you and knowing I'm sneaking around with your ex." Audrey and Pacey? I would never have guessed, or maybe I should have guessed. They always seemed to disappear at the same times, now that I think about it. "Say something." "I...why would it change our friendship?" "You guys used to date." "There's a key word to that sentence, Audrey." I tell her, still surprised but glad she doesn't know about Dawson and me. "We used to date. I'm not his keeper, but I am grateful that you told me." "That's it?" "What did you expect?" "More of a reaction." She shrugs her shoulders. "That you'd be mad." I laugh lightly. "There's nothing to be mad about, whatever there was with Pacey is long gone." "Really?" "Yeah." "You're sure?" "Yeah." I assure her. She looks at me curiously. "You look different, why do you look different?" I silently bite my lip. "How do I look different?" "When I came in you were in your bathrobe and earlier Jack told me that he caught you in a rather compromising position with some guy or he assumed it was a guy." "Audrey!" "You had sex, didn't you? Not long before I came back." "Maybe." I avert my eyes from hers. "Although I should tell you Jen and Jack think that I was with Pacey when Jack came in." She starts to laugh. "Well I can tell them you weren't, I was with him." "I thought you went home." "No way, no changing the subject." She tells me. "Who was the guy? I never knew you were seeing someone, sneaky!" "He was nobody Audrey." "I want to know his name." "Why?" "Because I'm your friend and your roommate and I should know these things." She looks at me expectantly and I'm not sure what to tell her. "Well?" "It's just a guy from my English Lit class." "Just a guy, Joey Potter doesn't just do a guy." She thinks about it for a moment. "Okay, maybe she does but what is his name?" "Darren." I blurt out, remembering the name of the guy that sits behind me. She only needs to be disillusioned for a little while, it's not like she'll go looking for the guy tomorrow. Or will she? "What's he like?" She asks yawning. "I'm not sharing those details Audrey." "I meant as a person." She stifles another yawn. "I'll tell you tomorrow, you can hardly keep your eyes open. "Fine." She gives in. "Don't think I won't remember what we've to discussed." And knowing Audrey she won't forget. I guess that explains why she's always been disappearing lately. She probably never even went to visit her parents. Climbing under the comforter I bury my face in the pillow and there's a faint smell of Dawson . I guess it's really happening. We're finally a couple after all this time. Closing my eyes I can't help but feel sorry for him, that wasn't exactly the best way to send him off. When will he get the chance to talk to Jen? Tonight, tomorrow, anytime soon? More importantly, will I be able to face her? Knowing what's been happening without any of them knowing. Smiling I inhale his scent again, looking forward to the next time I see him. ***** At Grams house everything appeared to be still as I creep upstairs. As I make my way towards the attic where I've been sleeping since Grams took me in I hear voices in Jen's room. Curiously I knock on the door before poking my head in, to find Jen and Jack talking. Jen is under the comforter and Jack is sitting at the foot of her bed. "Hey." They both say turning to see me. "Did Joey get home alright?" Jen asks and I feel a twinge of guilt as I enter the room. "Yeah." I simply reply. She definitely got home alright, the last time I saw her she looked great. "We kind of got to talking for a while." "So did she tell you?" Jack asks. "Tell me what?" "Who the guy was." Jen offers. "What guy?" I ask with my best innocent voice. "Oh that's right, you were in Capeside." Jack says before adding. "Yours truly caught Ms. Potter in a rather compromising position with some guy." "Hey, it may have been a girl." Jen interjects laughing. "We have reason to believe it's Pacey." I start to laugh but they both look serious. "Pacey? Why would you think it was him?" Jen shrugs and Jack replies, "Because Pacey was there, he told me he was there." "He told you." Jack shakes his head. "No, but he said he saw her." I feel a little uneasy about the topic of conversation, more-so because I don't like the fact I know it's not true or that they're playing a guessing game. "If it were Pacey," I begin. "Do you think he would have placed himself at Joey's if he knew you guys knew there was someone there?" "Ah, good point." Jack says, sounding somewhat defeated. "Anyways, I am going to go to bed." "Night Jack." Jen and I say at the same time. As Jack leaves the room and closes the door, I move towards the bed. I guess this is as good a time as any. I can't go on like this. "Did you get your purse?" I ask, finally picking my spot near where she was sitting. "Yeah." She replies after a moment. There's no easy way to say this other than to just blurt it out. No point going for the 'we need to talk' because that just prolongs hurting her. "This isn't working." I end up saying. Not exactly less hurtful but everything else in my head was just the same. I wait for the questioning look, the 'what are you talking about' but it doesn't come. "It isn't is it?" She replies not really expecting an answer and part of me is surprised that she agreed. I guess neither of us has been happy for a while and the thought crosses my mind, what changed for her? We've been dating for three months, yet this somehow doesn't have that 'break-up' feel. "How long have you been thinking that for?" She asks, her eyes not wavering from mine. "About a month." I sigh. "In the beginning we both needed someone." I begin and she nods agreeing. "It felt right at the time." "Yeah." I agree. "When did it change for you?" "Just before I left for New York . I saw the way other couples looked at one another and just knew something was different." She smiles weakly. "We didn't have that." "So what happens now?" I ask, already knowing. "We go back to being friends." Jen replies. "But somehow I think this transition will be better than last time." She laughs when she finishes. "Yeah." I agree. "But, I think it'd be best if I moved out." "You know Grams won't agree with that." "I know, but I think it'll make the transition to friends easier." "It was good while it lasted." "Well, for the first couple of months." She laughs, squeezes my hand and I think we'll get through this. "I'm going to go to bed now, but I'll tell Grams in the morning." "Okay." She replies lying down. "Night Dawson ." "Goodnight Jen." I say before closing the door. Walking up to my room I can't help but smile. In the end it wasn't as bad telling Jen as I expected it to be. Should I be surprised she feels the same way I do? I think I'm more relieved that I haven't hurt her feelings, than the fact something wasn't right for her either. As I remove my shirt I take my cell phone out of my pocket and notice there is an unread text message and recall putting the phone on silent earlier. Reading the message I can't help but smile as it's from Joey. "Is it strange that my bed seems empty without you? See you soon, J." Part 30 - Beauty on the Fire Sitting at the foot of my bed I glance from the bathroom door to the clock and back to the bathroom door. Just how long is Audrey going to be in there for? I know she has a date with Pacey and I know she was supposed to leave for it ten minutes ago, which makes me wonder why she hasn't left yet. Standing I start to pace in front of the window. I need to come up with some sort of cover story, after all, she thinks that ‘Darren' is coming over, and she's right he is, but it's Dawson . He called yesterday to tell me that he was moving out of Grams and onto the boat Pacey is living on, of all places. When Audrey heard that she winked at me and said she knew I wouldn't mind if Dawson spent the odd night here, sleeping in her bed so she could spend time with Pacey. I told her it wouldn't be a problem; it was difficult to keep the smile off of my face on hearing that. A few hours later Dawson called back to tell me that Audrey was going to be staying at Pacey's tonight, he asked if I was busy or was I in the mood for a date. Unknown to me, Audrey had heard the end of the conversation and got enough information to know I was making a date and joked that she wasn't leaving here until she'd met Darren. But I guess she wasn't joking because she's taking her sweet time and Dawson is due here any minute. I've tried calling his cell but it's engaged. Just as I'm about to try his cell one final time someone knocks on the door and I know right away who it'll be. I also know as soon as Audrey sees Dawson she'll probably figure it out. Quickly opening the door I see Dawson standing there and I grab his arm and pull him inside. “Hey, it's nice to see you too.” Dawson smiles. “I guess it's safe to say you missed me.” He leans down to kiss me as he finishes. Taking a step backwards I say, “Audrey's in the bathroom.” “Ohhh, isn't she supposed to be…” I nod my head. “Fifteen minutes ago, but she overheard me talking to you yesterday and told me she was not leaving here until she'd met, well, you and if we don't think of something quick she's going to know when she comes out that there is no Darren and…” “Who's Darren?” He asks confused. “It's your codename.” “Got it.” He replies and it's only now that I see the single white rose he has in his hand. “Is that for me?” I ask just as I hear Audrey unlock the bathroom door; open it as she enters the room I move towards Dawson and put my arms around him. “Hey, I thought I heard voices… Dawson , what are you doing here?” She asks and I can only imagine the look on both of their faces, probably both confused. “What's going on?” She asks after a moment of neither of us saying anything and I sniffle. “Why did he do it?” I say against Dawson 's chest. “Why'd he dump me?” “I – I don't know Jo.” He replies playing along. “Someone want to tell me what I missed.” Audrey says with a hint of annoyance in her voice. “Ah, Darren ended things with Joey.” Dawson begins. “He only called a little while ago and Joey called me to come over so she wouldn't be alone…” “Aw bunny, you should have told me. I'll just call Pacey and cancel…” “No, that's okay.” I reply. Still facing Dawson I whisper “convince her,” before breaking away and moving towards the toilet. “I think I'm going to be sick.” Closing the door behind me I hear Audrey call, “Are you alright?” But I don't reply. Instead I wait in here for a few minutes hoping that Dawson can somehow get rid of her. Why did this have to get so complicated? It was supposed to be easy. And I guess in the beginning it was kind of easy, when only Dawson and I knew what was happening, what was going on. But ever since Jack sort of caught us, it's been harder. “Joey?” Audrey calls through the door. “Are you okay?” “Yeah.” I call as my eyes water and I open the door. She throws her arms around me and pats my back. “I knew he sounded too good to be true when you told me about him. But we all know he's made a huge mistake and he'll regret that soon enough. If you want me to go pound his ass for you, I will.” “Thanks Audrey.” I laugh. Letting me go so she can look at me. “Now Dawson says that I should still go to Pacey's, but if you want me to stay I will.” “I don't want to ruin your night.” “You wouldn't be.” Audrey insists as Dawson stands behind her and sticks his tongue out at me. “Liar!” I reply. “But Dawson's here and he can keep me company…” “You're sure?” “Yeah.” “Then I guess I will go. But if you need to talk and Dawson isn't cutting it for you, just call.” She says hugging me again. “Thanks Audrey.” I say as she grabs her coat. Dawson opens the door for her and she whispers something in his ear and he smiles before closing and locking the door behind her. “I guess our cover was almost blown…” I say walking towards him. “Yeah, it's a good job you thought fast.” “Indeed it is.” I reply as I take his hands in mine. “Why'd you dump me?” “Crazy mistake.” Dawson replies as I wrap an arm around him. “Will you forgive me?” “I'll think about it.” “You know, you should think of becoming an actress…” “Well I have stared in a few movies…” “Really?” Dawson asks, grinning. “What kind of movies?” I playfully swat his shoulder. “Not those kind of movies.” “Are you sure?” “If I did they're only in your mind.” “You better believe it.” Tracing the outlined of his jaw I ask, “Are we going to stand here all night making small talk or are you going to kiss me?” He lowers his head to mine and brushes his lips gently against my own while wrapping his arms around my waist and lifting me a little. While still holding me, Dawson takes a few steps back and places me on the floor beside my bed, our lips still moving together. He breaks the kiss and takes hold of one of my hands. “My first act as your date – well after lying to your roommate, was to…” He trailed off as he picked up the rose he had been carrying earlier. “Thank you.” I reply taking it from him, kissing him quickly. “And your second act?” Dawson cocked an eyebrow. “Isn't that the part where we go at it like porn stars?” “It's not like we need a motel room, is it?” I grinned wrapping my arms around him again. “But…I thought you were gonna bring a movie.” “So original.” Dawson rolled his eyes at me. “Why is it always me that has to bring the movie?” Shrugging my shoulders I trail a hand down his chest. “It's what you do.” “Let's say I had brought a movie,” he began as he brushed a stand of hair off of my face. “Would we even get to the point of watching it?” I pondered the question for a moment. “Maybe.” “Maybe?” He asks and I lightly nod my head. “Well then, it's a good job I did bring something.” “I knew it!” I tell him as he picks his backpack up from my bed and I look at him quizzically. “Did you have that earlier?” Dawson chuckles lightly. “Yeah, but you were too preoccupied with trying to get rid of Audrey.” “What did you bring?” Opening the backpack her replies, “A classic.” “You brought ET, didn't you?” I say knowingly. “What makes you say that?” I shrug my shoulders and roll my eyes. “Wild guess.” “Although ET is a classic, it is not what I brought.” Laughing I put my hand out so he can show me what he brought. “I thought ET was the only classic?” “Oh, I guess we won't bother with a movie at all if I am going to be mocked…” Dawson trails off as he drops the video back in his backpack. “No, no, no.” I begin as I grab the backpack. “I want to see what you brought.” I inform him, extracting the case. “ Casablanca ?” Dawson lightly shrugs his shoulders. “I'm not so predictable after…” He trails off as I pull another video out of the backpack. “All.” Laughing now at the ET cover in my hand, I manage to say. “I knew it!” “Open it.” He instructs me and as I do the smile on my face falters. “That's ‘Love Story'. I guess I'm not as predictable as you thought.” “I don't know Dawson , I'm wondering if ET is in there.” “Well it's not.” Suddenly I recall a time from before when I thought he was predictable and he surprised me, well almost, with a romantic meal…albeit with his dad and girlfriend. Stepping forward I kiss him gently on the lips, cupping his cheek as the videos fall to the floor. “You're not as predictable as you used to be.” I tell him as I caress his cheek. “There are a lot of things I wouldn't have expected of you.” “Like?” “Like giving up your dream college or having sex in a bathroom.” I say kissing him softly once more. “Some things you just never imagined happening, like me and whipped cream bikinis.” “Only in my wildest dreams.” Shocked I ask, “Really?” Nodding. “Oh yeah.” I feel myself blushing slightly. He's seen me all sorts of naked, yet just thinking that he has thought of me like that makes me blush. ***** Ten minutes later, the movie is more or less forgotten as we fall into talking while lying on Joey's bed. She's gone from lying with her back against me to laying on her tummy facing me, leaning on her elbow and I lie on my side. “So, there really hadn't been much thinking behind it?” Joey asks me. I had never told her at any point after all of this started that things hadn't really been going great with Jen. I guess we were just going through the motions, neither of us being able to tell the other it wasn't working. Shacking my head I reply, “No. Things just seemed to change overnight yet I can't say what it was that changed things.” “Why didn't you tell me?” “At which point was I supposed to tell you?” I ask. “When your tongue was in my mouth? Before we'd even discussed what any of this meant?” “How about when you stopped by and told me you didn't want this to ruin our friendship?” “Those were actually your words.” I run my fingers through my hair. “I almost told you then that I wanted more, but I hesitated for a slight moment because you hadn't shown you wanted anything else.” “You know if we'd both thought of it we'd have realised that when something happens once it's an accident and when it happens more than once it's not.” She laughs lightly. “We had sex more than once that first night.” Joey pauses for a moment. “Why do you think I wanted to talk first? It was so I could get through the big speech I'd worked out in my head and I knew that if I didn't say it all quick I would just say what I really felt.” “I guess we were both silly for thinking it was just friendship.” Joey nods her head in agreement. “So how long should we keep this quiet for? A few weeks, months…” “Until we're ready to tell people, I guess.” “You know that Pacey and Audrey dating is good for us right?” She asks with a grin on her face. “They feel like they're putting us out.” “Tell me about it. Pacey was so apologetic and grateful. If only they knew.” I laugh before turning serious. “But I still can't shake feeling guilty for not being totally honest with Jen; I know it was dead but...” Joey puts a finger to my lips to silence me. “It wasn't totally your fault. I suppose deep down you both already knew.” “I suppose.” “Otherwise nothing would have happened with us and I don't like the sound of that.” She says as I begin to stroke her wrist with my thumb. “Me either.” I smile. There's a brief moment of silent contemplation before I take her hand in mine. Bringing it to my lips, I kiss her knuckles and then her palm before she turns her body to face mine. “It's always been you Jo.” I tell her as she cups my cheek. “I know.” She says tracing the outline of my lips with her thumb. “I guess I always knew that too.” Smiling, she snuggles closer to me and I wrap an arm around her waist before crushing her lips with my own in a sweet loving kiss. A she still caresses my cheek with her hand I trail one of mine down her back while clasping the fingers of me free hand in hers. The kiss is broken and she smiles up at me. “This isn't much of a first date you know. A girl likes to be swept off of her feet, ya know?” “Really?” I ask kissing her quickly. “Are all girls like that?” “Just the important ones.” “I see.” I say before stealing another quick kiss. “And do guys like it when the girl they're dating kicks them out into the hall after she's made him all hot and bothered for her?” “I was kind of hoping you would, I don't know, forget all about that!” “Did you really expect me to?” “No.” She rolls her eyes. “I guess we could call it even.” “Wouldn't that be letting you off too easy?” “I don't think so.” She replies quickly and laughs at the face I've pulled. “Okay, maybe from your point of view it would.” “You could even say it's enough reason for you to be in the dog house.” She ponders that for a moment, tracing my jaw line. “I guess I could make it up to you…” She begins. “What if I were to take you out for our first date?” “Keep talking.” “We could go for a picnic, I would cook something…” “Where are you going to get to cook?” “I forgot to mention that we'd be in Capeside for the weekend.” She sings the last part. “We could go back on Friday.” Here it comes again Smiling at her I kiss her nose. “I suppose that'll do...for now.” “Just shut up and kiss me!” She instructs. I oblige, moving my lips against hers as she winds her arms around my neck and I move mine behind her back, pulling her close. As we continue to kiss she pulls me closer and moves onto her back, pulling me on top and pretty soon things start to heat up. She moves one hand down my back and pinches my ass, while I move one of my hands down her waist, caressing her thigh. Burying my head in the crock of her neck, I kiss her neck; contemplating giving her a hickey but that would probably lead to Audrey asking questions. Drawn towards the edge Joey pulls my T-shirt out of my jeans and mumbles something while pulling the t-shirt higher until I kneel up and pull it over my head. She sits up and scoots closer, her lips finding mine once more in a heated kiss as her hands roam my upper body and I yank up her tank top, momentarily breaking the kiss in order to remove it. As we kiss again she moves into my lap and I cup her breasts through the flimsy material of her bra as she traces the outline of my nipple. Grinding her hips against mine she breaks the kiss and lets go of me for a moment in order to remove her bra. Tonight, could I be lost forever Taking my hand she opens her mouth a sucks on one of my fingers, her eyes locked on mine as she grinds her hips against the bulge in my jeans and she bits her lip. Removing my finger from her mouth she moves my hand so that it trails down to one of her breasts before circling the already pert nipple. She still amazes me. Kissing again I lower her to the bed, before kissing a trail down her body and gently sucking and blowing on her other nipple causing her to arch her back off of the bed, brushing against the confines of my jeans. Here it comes again Her hands move to my hair and she whispers my name over and over. I love how it sounds when she's like this, love how I have this affect on her. That it drives her wild. While still paying attention to her breasts I move my hands to her jeans and start to undo them and she raises her hips in order for me to take them off. Once they're discarded of she sits up again, crawling into my lap and grinding her hips against mine again as a moan escapes from her lips. Sweet torture. Placing my hands on her breasts she kisses me again before whispering in my ear. “Take yours off.” “Okay.” I tell her against her lips and she extracts herself from my lap and I stand. Tonight, could I be lost forever Joey unzips my jeans and undoes the button, pushing them down along with my boxer shorts while laying butterfly kisses on my stomach. While running a finger over the tip of my cock she pats the bed beside her and I sit. Once more, she crawls into my lap, grinding her hips against mine, both of us letting out a moan and she gently bites on my ear. Sensory Pleasure Her lips find mine again as I lower her onto the bed, her hands on my shoulders. I cup her breast as my erection presses against the fabric of her thong, both of us moaning into each others mouths. I move my hand lower, caressing her ass before placing it at the back of her leg and pulling her leg slightly off of the bed. Breaking the kiss she gasps, “Take it off.” I don't oblige right away, instead rocking into her. Do I assume I could fly “ Dawson …” She pleads as her hand stills mine. Kissing down her body, I lower the garment as she lifts her hips, my kisses falling on her breasts, her tummy and her outer thigh. Throwing the thing on the floor I look at her naked body for a moment, seeing her flushed face before kissing back up her body. The ankle of one leg, the knee of the other, her inner thing and finally her lips. Tonight, could I be lost forever She threads her arms around my neck again and gasps into my mouth as I enter her and a few moments later she bucks her hips against mine. Our movements are slow at first, the kisses passionate until I feel I just want to look at her as the pressure continues to build for her. Joey's digging her heels into the bed while arching her back as moans keep escaping from her lips. She reaches for my hand and clasps her fingers in mine as her breathing becomes more erratic. “Joey…” I moan as I feel myself about ready to give in to this feeling, still moving with and against her. Sensory Pleasure She raises her free hand to caress my cheek and raises he head off the bed and I lower mine to hers. Our lips meeting again for a sweet lingering kiss as our bodies continue to glide against each other and I feel the onset of Joey's orgasm wrack her body and my name falls from her lips repeatedly as she moves her hips against mine again. A few moments and thrusts later and I follow her over that blissful edge before collapsing on top of her and kissing her forehead. Moving off of her, I place an arm over her stomach as we both come down again and I can't help but think about how everything has changed between us. Two weeks ago we were wearing our ‘friends' hats and now we're like this. It's amazing how everything changed and one day I'll have to thank Oliver for initiating all of this…we both will. *The End.* -------------------------------------------------- |