* * *
After Sam walked back into the main office, Josie turned back to Rob and scowled. After a moment of thought, she removed her wings pin in order to have some off camera words with Rob now that Sam was gone. "Way to go, Rob. Why don't you just tell him I'm an undercover reporter while you're at it?" she asked disgustedly.
"Sorry, I just slipped up. He doesn't suspect anything anyway. Just tell him it's a softball meeting with your old coach, Gus." Rob argued as he sat down and started to put his sandals on. "Why don't you just give me the keys to Bambi now, while you're thinking about it?"
"Don't push your luck Rob. How could you tell him about the cars without letting me know about it? I could have blown everything, don't you realize that?"
"Don't shake that finger at me. Everything's fine. You're quick on your feet and I have confidence in you. Nice dress by the way - I could tell he thought so too," Rob said pointing towards the office.
"Don't try to change the subject by flattering me, Rob."
"S'cuse me for being nice and complimenting my favorite sister," he said, squinting at her.
"I'm your only sister, so how is that any kind of compliment?"
"Jeez, I thought you'd be in a good mood after all that happened yesterday - you did make the play that won the game, Josie, thanks to my brilliant coaching strategy," Rob argued. "You know, I've been thinking, even if I don't get picked up by a pro scout, I really like coaching - I think I'm kind of good at it, don't you?"
"Yes, Rob, you are a great coach. Everybody told you that yesterday. Coach Romano and Mr. Coulson both said so; you know that. You're still just trying to change the subject."
"Josie, are you really going to beat this dead horse again? Enough already, okay? I'm sorry, but a man's gotta do what a man's gotta do, ya know?"
"Don't even think about saying this is part of those stupid rules, Rob."
"I was here at your locker two full hours before school just to give you a head's up. It's not my fault you and Mr. C met up in the parking lot at the crack of dawn. What was that about anyway?" Rob raised his eyebrows to leer at her.
"Nothing, Rob, just a coincidence. He borrowed someone's car and pulled in right after I did. We've been out there for the past forty-five minutes talking about you and that stupid car of yours."
"For forty-five minutes?" Rob looked at her skeptically. "I didn't know that I was so interesting to the two of you. Are you sure that's all you were doing - talking about me? You two looked awfully guilty when you walked in together."
"I can't believe you. You're here sliding around the hall, singing at the top of your lungs at 7 in the morning in a public building, and your trying to embarrass me for just walking through the door. You're the one who should be embarrassed, acting like a hyena."
"Oh really? Well, I happen to think that I have a great deal of talent."
"What were you doing anyway?"
"You tell me what you and Mr. C were really doing out there and maybe I'll think about telling you."
"I don't know what you mean, Rob."
"Something was going on out there. I could tell."
"You're crazy. We were just talking. I'm not going to let you put me on the defensive. I wasn't doing anything wrong and neither was Sa�, Mr. Coulson�What do you mean you could tell?"
"I could tell by the way he looked at you that something happened."
Josie blushed and looked at the floor.
"Aha! I knew it. Rob is never wrong!" Rob nodded smugly.
"You are wrong, Rob. Please. Nothing happened."
"Then why won't you look me in the eye?" Rob asked skeptically.
She looked up at him. "Nothing happened, Rob. Not in the way you mean."
"What do you think I mean?" Rob asked, cocking his head to one side.
"You know, sex things. Nothing happened like that," Josie whispered.
"See, now you always assume the worst about me. That's not where I was going with this - I think your mind is in the gutter, Josie. All you think about is sex," Rob teased.
"What did you mean?" she asked curiously.
"I think�" he paused dramatically for effect, "that�some touching went on out there. That's what I think, oh yes, definitely. Somebody touched somebody else. I'd bet the farm on it, for sure," he said nodding.
Josie blushed purple and started stammering, "Sssstop it, Rob, right this instant."
"I knew it. And if I had to guess, I'd say you touched him," he said triumphantly.
"What, were you peeking out the window?" She asked, obviously flustered.
"I knew it. You touched him. I had other fish to fry. Why would I come to the school two hours early - so I could stare out the window at my sister?"
"Because you're insane."
"So you say. But I'm right and you know it. You were out there touching him."
"I can't believe this, Rob. What makes you say something like that?" She asked curiously.
"I could tell by the way he looked at you," Rob said smiling.
"How was he looking at me?" Josie had to ask in spite of her better judgment.
Rob knew that he had her now. All he had to do was reel her in. And he knew he was right. "Well, he was looking at you�like�he wanted you to do whatever it was again. I was kind of shocked really - to think that you'd do something like that."
"What do you mean?" she demanded.
"You know," Rob said, shaking his head at her.
"I didn't touch him any where like you mean, Robert. Really!"
"Oh, yeah? Where did you touch him then?"
"His arm."
"No way, it was more than that. Don't lie to me, Josie. I know better than that."
"Okay his arm and his shirt."
"Oh, I see�" Rob said, nodding again, and rubbing his chin.
"Stop saying that, I just touched him there," she said pointing at Rob's shirt at the place where she had touched Sam.
"Well, I was afraid of that. You put your hand on his chest is what you're telling me," Rob raised his eyebrows.
"On his shirt. Yes, on top of his shirt. I was trying to tell him something - convince him of something and I put my hand there for a minute."
"Don't give me this on his shirt stuff - what were you doing checking to see what the material was? C'mon you pressed down didn't you?"
"A little," she admitted guiltily. "Just for a minute."
"Wow, a full minute? You put your hand on his chest for a full minute?" Rob could tell he was making her very nervous. He shook his head then and clicked his tongue at her. "I'm kind of shocked, Josie."
"Why, what do you mean? There's nothing wrong with that."
"There's nothing wrong with that, but it sends him a signal about you, that you would touch him like that, and pressing down on his chest too." Rob said seriously. "Especially the fact that you would hold your hand there for more than a second - that's really something. My own sister. I'll bet his heart was really going, wasn't it?" he said shaking his head again.
"I don't know," she muttered, "I guess so."
"I guess so too, you're lucky you didn't have to call 911 for the poor guy!"
"For the love of God, Robert, just tell me what you mean," she demanded.
"When you put your hand on a guy's chest like that and hold it there, he knows that you want him, Josie." Rob said quietly. "It's like an unspoken language."
She frowned at him. "Who says?"
"I say. It's the way of the world. That's how I'd take it if a woman held her hand on my chest. It's like saying 'Take me now, baby, I'm yours.'"
She covered her mouth with her hand, thinking about the dream she'd shared with Sam. That had been what she'd meant in that dream and she knew it. She'd put her hand on his chest, asking him to make love to her. "Oh, my God. He probably thinks I'm awful."
"Yeah, Josie, that's why he wants to see you again alone before you leave today. He thinks you're so awful he can hardly wait for you to do it again. Do you want to know what I think?"
"I'm afraid to ask, Rob." She hesitated and looked at the floor. "Okay, what do you think?"
Rob rubbed his chin again for emphasis. He knew he had her full attention now and she would probably forget to pursue her line of questioning about his hall antics. Now that he had her worried he decided he'd give her a little honest reassurance to make her feel better.
"I really think he was surprised - it definitely took him off guard. He liked it - he is in love with you after all so I know he really liked that you did it. He didn't pull it off or anything did he?"
"N-no. I took it off." Josie said it quietly, remembering how she'd removed her hand in reaction to Sam whispering in her ear. "What does it mean then?"
"I think that he realizes that you don't know what it means. He definitely liked it or he would have been the one to take it off. By the way, what happened that made you take your hand off him?" Rob asked curiously.
"What difference does that make?"
"All the difference in the world. If you want my opinion on this you have to level with me. I can't analyze this for you if you don't come clean, Josie."
"He whispered something in my ear and his voice kind of, well it kind of shook me up and I had to hold on to the car to stay standing," she confessed.
"So he was letting you know he feels the same way, that's what that was. When he whispered in your ear, he was saying, 'Baby I want you too, let's go!'" Rob noticed Josie wince, but he continued, "And when you took your hand off and acted nervous, he knew you didn't mean it in that way in the first place. Why did you put your hand there anyway, Josie?"
"I was trying to um convince him of something, you know - make my point, persuade him."
"Oh, I see. You thought if you got him all hot and bothered he'd agreed to anything and he let you know he could get you that way too. He was letting you know you can't use sex to get your way with him - to get him to do what you want. Only he knew that you didn't realize that you were sending sex signals to him. At least he knew it after you took your hand away that you weren't deliberately trying to tease him like that. You were just trying to manipulate him and control him."
"Oh, God, Rob, this is so complicated. I hope he doesn't think I'm horrible."
"For getting him all worked up at seven in the morning? Nah, he knows you didn't do it on purpose. He probably wishes you did mean it that way, but he doesn't know you're twenty-five so he's cutting you a lot of slack. What were you trying to get him to agree to, did it have anything to do with me and Bambi?"
"Yes, Rob. I wanted him to see my side of things."
"Yeah, Mr. Coulson's my man. He's not going to be manipulated by your offers of sex, you hussy!"
"Shut up, Rob."
"Just kidding. Hey, you want to know the other thing I noticed?"
"What's that?"
"The way you two are dressing. Like you in that dress today and him - the way he's dressing."
"I thought he looked nice, Rob," Josie defended. "And what's wrong with the way I'm dressed?"
"Nothing - that's just it - you've lost weight and you've got a lot of new sexy stuff. You used to dress like some librarian or something." She scowled at him.
"Don't scowl at me, you did and you know it. Like those stupid gaucho things you wore to the Tiki Post. Look at that tight dress yesterday and the one today. You're wearing all this new stuff trying to get his attention. And your hair's all done different every day. And he's paying more attention to the way he looks too. He definitely looks more put together now than when I first started."
"Mr. Coulson always looked wonderful," Josie sighed.
"He looked fine, but he's dropped the sweatshirts and now he's tucking in his shirts and trying to get you to notice him more. I'll bet he even ironed that shirt he's got on today. Even I can tell that. He wants you to check him out."
Josie smiled then as she remembered how Sam had glowed when she'd complimented him on his shirt. He had seemed really pleased that she'd paid attention to what he was wearing and liked it. She looked at Rob. "Rob can I ask you a question?"
"Sure, go ahead. I got time. Doctor Rob is definitely in."
"I can tell he, well, likes what I'm wearing by the way he looks at me, at least I think he does."
Rob nodded. "Oh, he definitely does, trust me on that."
"But, Rob, he never says anything - he never tells me I look nice. - but yesterday at the game Matt complimented me on my eyes and he agreed with him and last night I apologized for looking awful and he said I looked great, and he told me nice things later to bolster my self confidence, but why doesn't he ever just tell me I look nice?" she asked. "Like today when I saw him in the parking lot and no one was around - I could tell he liked my dress, but he didn't say anything about it. I heard him compliment Aldys on her outfit one time and I've heard him tell other people they look nice. Why do you think he won't say anything like that to me?"
Rob studied her for a minute. He couldn't believe how na�ve his sister could be sometimes.
"Josie," he said seriously. "First of all he is so in love with you that he gets all nervous every time he sees you because he doesn't want to be obvious about it to the whole world and he wants to do the right thing as your teacher. When you saw him in the parking lot this morning, he probably thought you looked so fantastic and he wanted to tell you that, but he was afraid that if he starts talking, he wouldn't be able to stop, you know? Like he'll say 'I love you' without thinking. He's thinking nice things even though he isn't saying them, I promise you that. If he says anything along those lines it'll be something he's thought about and practiced first, he won't do it spontaneously. He's too afraid he'll lose control of the situation. He's a nice guy and wants to do the right thing."
Josie sighed. "I know he is Rob. I'm going to tell him the truth this weekend, or by Monday at the lastest."
"Just remember to make sure he keeps the secret about both of us, Josie."
"I will, Rob. I'm not the one who's been blabbing anyway."
"I hear you, Josie. You've only been chewing me out about that for like a half hour now," Rob said rolling his eyes. "Hey, what's the meeting with Gus about?"
"He probably just wants to review things before the Prom. I did an outline of my story last night so I'm going to work on the first draft of it tonight and tomorrow, so I'm going to show him the outline."
"Be sure and tell him how much I'm helping you."
"I'm sure Gus isn't going to want to talk about you, Rob."
"I know he hates me."
"He doesn't hate you, it's just the way he is. He yells at everybody. He yells at me every time I see him and when I talk to him on the phone he hangs up on me. Don't take it personally."
Rob rubbed his chin. "Maybe he needs to find a girlfriend - maybe that's why he's like that."
Josie put her hands on her hips. "All Gus thinks about is work, Rob. I'm not getting involved with matchmaking for him."
"I just think he'd be a lot easier to work with if he was happy in his personal life," Rob said seriously.
"Since when are you such an expert on everybody's relationships?" Josie asked skeptically.
"I'm just telling you what I think - Gus needs a woman," he stated. "What about that hot friend of yours, Anita? She'd be perfect for him!"
"You're crazy, Rob! He screams at Anita more than anyone else. He's fired her at least eight times and he's always getting mad at her for having relationships with people at work," Josie said it shaking her head at Rob.
'Aha, I knew it. That's just sexual tension between them."
"You're so nutty, Rob."
"We'll see who's nutty, when you and I are up on that stage tomorrow night in the Prom Court."
"Yeah, right," Josie said rolling her eyes. "Dream on."
* * *
Josie was skeptical about Rob's prediction, but she spent the rest of the morning basking in compliments and praise from her fellow students about her performance in the softball game. Everyone she saw either complimented her on her appearance or her playing or both. And more than one person told her she was a shoo-in for the Prom Court.
Josie was amazed that Rob even managed to convince Guy that they had in fact attended the keg party at Jason's the night before. When Guy confronted Rob about not being there, Rob simply asked Guy what he meant and said incredulously "Everybody was drunk, don't you remember us coming there and leaving because we were tired?" Guy had looked at him then and nodded, thinking he did have a vague recollection of something like that.
By the middle of the day word had spread that Josie and Rob had attended the party briefly and people actually compared notes about seeing them there.
* * *
Sam had planned to give all his classes quizzes to work on, so he finally found several long blocks of time to think about what had happened that morning with Josie. He kept staring out the window at the parking lot, remembering their conversation.
He knew she had been trying to manipulate him by flirting with him When she did it she'd been so obvious and unbelievably adorable and funny. He knew she had no idea what putting her hand on his chest was doing to him. It made him smile just thinking about it. Josie always made him smile and laugh. He knew he couldn't remember a time when he'd been as happy and light- hearted as he'd been these past two weeks. But what had made her irresistible to him was when she had honestly wanted to make him feel better by caressing his arm.
The caring and love in her beautiful eyes was what almost pushed him beyond the edge of reason. That combined with the way she looked and his frustration at not being able to express himself to tell her how he felt about the way she looked had built up inside of him now for so many days. He resolved to finally find a way to say something to her before the end of the day. He just couldn't let her walk away to a meeting with another man, not knowing something about how he felt.
'Is it really so wrong for me to tell her how I feel about the way she looks?' He wondered as he stared out the window at the parking lot. Although he was shy, Sam had always tried to compliment his students when he thought they looked unusually nice, particularly the ones who he sensed didn't have confidence in themselves. Sam knew he had told Aldys he'd liked her outfit and Josie had heard him say it. 'Why couldn't I just say nice dress to her like a normal person?' he asked himself.
But he knew he wasn't in love with Aldys; that was the difference. How could he ever express himself to Josie without telling her everything that was on his mind? Because once those floodgates were open, Sam knew it would be a fight to keep the rest of his feelings bottled up inside. He was starting to wonder what the point was now to keeping those feelings from her. He wondered if all he was doing was unnecessarily hurting both of them by sticking to some rigid standard that he'd already violated anyway by falling in love with her in the first place.
'I know I can't date her or anything like that, but maybe there's a middle ground,' he thought running his hands through his hair while his junior class worked on their quizzes. Because a month from now he knew he wanted to take her on a trip halfway across the country alone with him. To pretend like she was just another student for even one more day was becoming more and more untenable to his state of mind. 'I'm going to have to tell her soon or I'll go crazy,' he decided as he closed his eyes. But then there was the question of whether he could live with himself as a teacher, once he did it.
Sam looked around at his students. He knew in his heart that he was a decent human being. This feeling for Josie was a once in a lifetime thing - he knew it for sure. And it hadn't affected his performance as a teacher. He'd worked harder this semester than ever before - if anything it had inspired him to do better. And Josie was such a brilliant student - this feeling between the two of them certainly hadn't impacted her performance - Sam knew from her other teachers that she was a straight A student in all her classes.
'So, why should we keep torturing ourselves by trying to hide what we both know is true?' he wondered. He knew he didn't have enough arguments against telling her to fight the urge much longer. And he knew he wasn't trying to use his position as her teacher to take advantage of her. Quite the opposite in fact - he'd bent over backwards to avoid taking that final step. And the consequences, time and again, had been hurtful to both of them.
The clearest example of this had occurred just the day before at the softball game. Because he'd kept his feelings hidden, Matt had misinterpreted his behavior and Josie had been furious at him because of it. 'I've already told her I'm jealous - so what's the point of not telling her I love her? Why continue to pretend she's just another student? Who am I kidding anyway?' Sam debated to himself.
He knew he could trust her to keep their relationship secret until the school year ended. Because if he didn't trust her that much, what would be the point to a relationship in the first place?
'Well, first things first,' he thought wistfully. 'I'll tell her about Dartmouth and see how that goes.'
After the assembly, as Josie and Rob walked down the hall, they were met by Jason, Brett and Tommy, three very late arrivals at school that day.
"Hi, Josie! Hi, Rob!" Jason said, high fiving them from across the hall.
"Lookin good, guys!!" Brett yelled as he went by.
Tommy approached Rob from the side. "Josie! Robster! Rufus kegger!" Both Rob and Josie noticed that Tommy was slurring his words and smelled like beer.
Rob put his arm around Tommy's neck. "You were-are wasted, man!" he exclaimed in his ear as he pushed him away.
"Rob, this is so unbelievable!" Josie said in awe at her brother. "I've waited my whole life to fit in and I finally feel like I do!"
"You do!" he said smiling at her as they came out the side door of the school. Rob immediately noticed Mr. Coulson waiting expectantly just outside the door. He grinned knowingly and walked away so that Sam could take his place at Josie's side.
Gibby and Kirsten ran up to Josie's other side.
"Hi Rob! Hey Josie, who did Archie date - Betty or Veronica?" Gibby asked seriously.
"Both," Josie said quietly. Gibby looked at Kirsten and said, "See!" She and Kirsten continued talking amongst themselves.
Suddenly Sam appeared to her as if from nowhere and whispered in Josie's left ear. "I always liked Betty better."
Josie whirled around to look at him and smiled. "Really?" she asked sweetly.
"Yeah!" Sam continued grinning at her. Seeing her again made him feel somewhat giddy and out of control. His hands were shaking so much that he stuck them in his pockets so she wouldn't notice them as he rambled on while they walked together, "Betty was so fun and spunky. Veronica had the great legs." He noticed Josie peeking at her own legs and making a face.
Sam went on, "But she was too moody. Very high maintenance."
"Oh!" Josie said laughing while she peeked at her legs again as they walked through the prom decorations. They both felt as if they were on a date alone together. After noticing her glance at her legs several more times, Sam decided to pose the question on his mind.
"Why do you keep looking at your legs?" Sam asked curiously, amused at her reaction.
Josie blushed. "I, well, I always wished I had nice legs, you know instead of short ones like Betty," she confided.
Sam paused to let her walk in front of him over a red bridge. They were alone now in this section of the courtyard. He grabbed a balloon as they walked by. Sam knew that the moment for a direct compliment had arrived. He looked at Josie as she turned around to face him.
"Josie, you have fantastic legs! Much nicer than Veronica's," Sam said enthusiastically as she backed off the bridge. She was so shocked at Sam's sudden compliment that she almost lost her balance and braced herself on the railing.
Josie flushed with pleasure, forgetting about the camera for the moment. "I do?" she asked amazed. "You really think so?"
"I know so," Sam said grinning at her. "Why on earth would you doubt it?"
"Well," Josie hesitated, wanting to address one of her major insecurities. "I'm not really tall and to have nice legs I thought you had to be tall."
Sam laughed, but then he realized she was serious. "Josie Geller, you have the most beautiful legs I've ever seen anywhere and you're the perfect height." He was about to add 'for me,' but he stopped himself.
He saw she still looked skeptical. "Josie, why don't you believe me? Have I ever lied to you?"
She shook her head.
"Then believe me. You really do have gorgeous legs - and you are beautiful and perfect just the way you are, and you look especially nice today in that dress!" he said, gazing into her eyes. Sam felt like he'd crossed a major hurdle by successfully complimenting her at last.
Josie blushed then and stared at the ground. She had just been asking Rob about this and now Sam had complimented her - he'd actually given her a direct compliment almost as if he'd read her mind or overheard her conversation with Rob.
Sam knew at that instant that he wanted to tell her everything. No, what he really wanted to do was take her somewhere they could really be alone and kiss her passionately.
He settled for guiding her to a spot where two benches were set up together. Sam had come to this spot many times on nice days just to be alone and think about things - lately most of those things involved Josie and his growing feelings for her. And now here they were together alone - and all he wanted to do was tell her he loved her.
In one magical instant they both sat down and leaned in to kiss each other. At the last second, Josie remembered the hidden camera and Gus, and pulled back nervously. Sam felt a second of disappointment but realized that this was probably for the best. He hadn't initially intended to actually kiss her here in the school courtyard and that would really be out of bounds while he was still her teacher.
He sighed, suddenly remembering the reason he'd wanted to see her alone in the first place.
"Oh, my God, I almost forgot � I got you a meeting with the admissions guy from Dartmouth!" He was so excited he blurted it out without thinking about preparing her for the news.
He noticed the panicked look on Josie's face as she tried to cope with the shock at what he'd said. First he'd been about to kiss her, now suddenly he was talking about arranging for her to go to college. 'Great transition, Sam!' He thought, disgusted with himself.
"What! But � I wasn't even going to go to college!" Josie sputtered nervously.
"No, I know, but I pulled some strings and got him to look at your writing, and he agreed to meet with you," Sam said encouragingly. He wondered what it was that was making her so nervous now. She really looked scared and he wondered if maybe he should have checked with her before arranging for the meeting.
Josie looked into his eyes and suddenly she realized that he'd actually gone to the trouble to arrange an interview with an Ivy League College for her. She knew that was no small feat in and of itself. Sam had actually gone out of his way to do something he thought would help her future. Josie had never felt so touched by anything in her life and her heart melted.
"Wow," she said, obviously dazed. "You believe in me that much?" All the love and trust was there plain to see in her beautiful blue eyes. Sam could see how much what he'd done had meant to her and touched her heart and he felt relieved and gratified.
Sam reached over and took her right hand gently in his own. "Of course I do, Josie. You owe it to yourself � to your writing, to go to college. You are a great writer! You just have to find your story."
Josie sat up straight. She knew from what little she'd seen of the tapes that the camera at this close an angle would not be able to catch the fact that he'd taken her hand. So maybe just this once she could find a way to respond to Sam on camera, without catching Gus' attention.
Josie reached over slowly with her left hand, capturing Sam's hand between her own. She wanted to somehow let him know how much what he'd said had meant to her without alerting Gus to the fact that she was in love with this man.
Sam had reached for her without thinking, simply intending to squeeze her hand reassuringly. He had wanted her to know how much he believed in her and taking her hand like that had just seemed natural and right to him at the time. But then he'd touched her and felt the jolt of excitement run through him- now he couldn't quite bring himself to let go.
'Let go, Sam,' he told himself, but then she'd gently squeezed him back and put her other hand so softly on top his. Josie was holding his hand in between hers now and she was most definitely in control, holding his hand firmly between her own. Sam closed his eyes as his heart beat wildly, then slowly opened them, staring into hers.
Josie had tears in her eyes as she stared at him. He knew she wanted to tell him something and he was more than happy to stay just like that for as long as she wanted him to. Sam was afraid to breathe for fear she'd let go of his hand.
Josie knew there was something she wanted to say to him and right now she didn't give a damn who might or might not be listening.
"Nobody in my whole life has ever believed in me as much as you have," she said truthfully. "I just hope I don't let you down."
Sam was so moved by what she said that he didn't know how to respond other than by continuing to keep his hand between her own.
"Josie, I , I�." He started, but stopped abruptly as she shook her head at him.
"Don't say it," she mouthed, still shaking her head. He knew she didn't want him to continue, but he didn't quite understand why. Suddenly as he looked at her shaking her head he knew why - 'she's protecting me,' he realized, 'from what?' he wondered. 'myself?' They were communicating without talking and he knew somehow that she just wanted him to stay there so she could hold on to him just like this. Sam was happy to remain there holding her hand as long as he could.
'Don't ask for more right now Sam,' he thought happily. ' For once in your life, just enjoy the moment.'
To be continued�