Here is installment #6, just in time for Christmas. I hope you all enjoy it. Sorry for the delay, but as I had posted on the news board, one particular scene took me a day and a half to write…read on…you'll know which one…(grin)
And, as always, feedback is appreciated at either [email protected] or
on the bulletin board. Thanks again.
* * *
Sam stood on the porch and waved to Josie as she drove off. As he did, he felt the heavy mantle of depression settle back on him. It was as if the sunlight dimmed as she drove around the corner and out of sight. Sighing, he squared his shoulders and told himself to make the best of it, for Josie's sake, at least. He turned and started back up the steps to his apartment.
* * *
As she drove, Josie thought of Sam. She absolutely hated to leave him, even if he did seem a little better now. She could tell that he was deeply upset by this morning's turn of events. She couldn't blame him. She had not seen this coming at all; and apparently, neither had Sam. The whole thing seemed so absurd: she was 25 years old, not seventeen. She was no longer his student; in truth, she never had been. Still, the school board wanted to handle the situation as if it were no different than any other case. Sam never would have been attracted to her if she had played the part of being seventeen better. Yet, when she was around him she found that her true self kept slipping out, despite her best intentions. But she really had no idea how to convince others of this fact.
She was still puzzled when she got back to the office. Not watching where she was going, she plowed right into a wide male chest. She looked up to see the wide chest belonged to Gus, who looked rather annoyed. "Geller, watch where you're going, huh? Good thing I left my coffee on my desk…"
Seeing Gus gave her an inspired thought. She grabbed his elbow and started steering him back to his office. "Gus, I've got a story idea I think you're going to like…"
* * *
Sam stood up and wiped the sweat off his brow with the back of his hand. He had dug into the packing boxes like a man possessed, trying to keep thoughts of his fate at bay. It was only partially working, he realized. The more he unpacked, the more the reality of having Josie back in his life sank in, which was good. But with that came the reality that he was sure of nothing else right now. Should I even be unpacking? He wondered. I'll probably need to move to find another job, and probably far, far away from Chicago.
Yet, how could he leave when Josie was here?
He needed a break from his circular thoughts; they were giving him a headache. Sam walked into the kitchen, pulled open the door to the fridge, and grabbed a can of soda. Then, leaning against the door to close it, he popped the top and took a healthy swig. He looked around the kitchen and smiled at his handiwork. Almost back to normal, he thought. At least something was.
Hey, Sam thought suddenly, maybe I can cook some dinner tonight for Josie! He smiled at the thought. He'd like to impress Josie with something a little more challenging than omelets…He stepped away from the fridge to turn and pull the freezer door open. It was almost empty. Oh yeah, he remembered, I was moving…no food. Sigh. Would nothing go right for him today?
* * *
"All right, Geller, what is so important that you needed to drag me bodily back to my own office to tell me about it?" Gus barked, closing the door behind them.
"Gus, I want to write a story," Josie began.
"Yeah, so…go write one!" he bellowed.
"No," she clarified, "I want to have a story written, but it can't be written by me."
"Okay, Josie, now I'm confused," Gus said.
Without preamble, Josie explained, "Sam was suspended from South Glen South this morning. He's under investigation by the school board for the possibility of wrongdoing with regard to his relationship with me."
Gus looked shocked momentarily, but recovered quickly. "And?"
"And I want to give the Sun-Times an exclusive on the story…provided it is written in such a way that it will attract attention to his plight and garner public support," Josie concluded.
"Why all the attention? Why can't you just talk to the school board and get it all straightened out before the news leaks out?"
"Because they won't believe me. Now that I am involved with Sam, they will simply believe that I would lie to them to protect him," Josie replied.
She continued, "The public was so interested with our story and its outcome last night; I can only hope that they will be as moved by the shocking turn of events this morning."
Gus looked at her for a long moment, considering. Then he said, "All right, Geller…but I want all the facts on this, no supposition. You need to find out exactly what's happening and when. Once you've got the story, report back to me and we'll get it done."
Josie beamed. "Thanks, Gus."
Watching her retreat, Gus shook his head. He needed to be more careful; his soft spot was showing.
* * *
Josie punched a button on her computer to access the online phone number search system used by the Sun-Times staff. After finding the number she needed, she turned off the monitor and picked up the phone and dialed.
It rang for a moment; then she heard a friendly, matronly voice inquire, "South Glen South High School Principal's office. How may I help you?"
"Yes, Principal Kerdan, please," Josie requested.
"May I ask who is calling?" the voice inquired.
"Josie Geller," she answered.
"One moment, I'll put you right through." There was a small click, and then silence. After a moment, she heard a man's booming voice saying, "Jack Kerdan."
"Principal Kerdan? This is Josie Geller," she began.
Before she could go on, he interjected, "Ah, Ms. Geller. I've been expecting to hear from you. What can I do for you?"
"Well, I'd like to meet with you to discuss the details of Sam Coulson's suspension. I understand it involves me," she informed him.
With a no nonsense tone, Kerdan replied, "Not a problem. How about, say, 1:30?"
Josie was relieved that he would meet with her. "Fine. Thank you, Mr. Kerdan."
He said cordially, "See you then. And call me Jack."
* * *
Sam felt his spirits drooping. Depression and hopelessness washed over him in waves, leaving him emotionally drained. How had everything gone so wrong so quickly? He sank into his leather armchair heavily, too tired to move. He shook his head as if he were trying to clear it.
He wondered briefly what Josie was doing. Did she miss him as desperately as he missed her right now? He thought back to just a couple of hours ago when she had been there and how much better he had felt in her presence. It was like she had lit up the room while he basked in her warm glow. And without her, the light went out, leaving him alone with his dark demons.
The particular demon plaguing him at the moment was, "Does she really love me?" After all, she had yet to say it since they were reunited last night. Of course, he hadn't come right out and said it either. But still…and now with his probable public disgrace, would she still want him? Maybe she'd be too embarrassed now that she had made a name for herself as a reporter and was on her way to certain success as a columnist…
"No!" a part of his mind protested. Why would she go through the possible humiliation of last night's spectacle if she didn't love him? "Yes, but that was before…" the demon in him answered.
There was a knock on the door. Could it be? He prayed it was Josie. He got up and walked to the door, opening it. He closed his eyes briefly in relief when he saw her standing there, two brown bags in one hand.
"I figured you'd be too busy unpacking to remember to eat, so I picked up some Chinese food…I, um…hope you like Chinese," she finished awkwardly.
"That's great, thank you," he replied with a smile. Then he ushered her inside and pushed the door shut. "The kitchen table is cleared off, if you want to put it there…"
"Okay. You get the plates, and I'll set out the food," Josie offered. Then she turned to enter the kitchen to set down the bags. Sam followed her, intent on getting out the plates and silverware. When she turned back to say something, they literally ran into each other. Josie laughed and said, "Following me, are you?"
Sam smiled, but had a serious look in his eyes. "I'd follow you anywhere."
Josie felt her breath catch at his words and gaze. She didn't know what to say to that, so she didn't say anything; she simply put her arms around his waist and pulled him toward her, kissing him.
Sam leaned into her embrace, letting Josie's kiss soothe away his fears. But then, remembering his train of thought before she arrived, his earlier doubts returned. He let go of her abruptly and turned away to get the plates.
Josie was shaken by Sam's sudden emotional retreat. "Sam, what's the matter?" she asked hesitantly.
"Nothing," he half-whispered, his head bowed, back still to her.
There was a scraping noise behind him as Josie pulled a kitchen chair out from the table. Then she grabbed Sam by the arm and tugged him down into it, forcing him to make eye contact with her. "Okay, Sam. What gives?" she asked, leveling an "I'm serious" look at him.
Sam squirmed in the seat. He closed his eyes for a moment and bent his head, trying to get a handle on his conflicting feelings. Then he took a deep breath and mumbled at the linoleum floor, "I'm afraid."
Josie brushed a stray lock of hair off Sam's forehead and then pulled out the chair closest to him and sat down. "Why? What are you afraid of?" she coaxed softly.
"Everything. I'm afraid of what's going to happen to me. I'm afraid of not knowing and I'm afraid of finding out. I'm afraid of all the changes I've made in my life lately. I'm afraid of myself. I don't know if I like who I am; I don't know if anybody else can like who I am." Now came the hardest part. After a pause and a deep breath, he continued, "And I'm afraid of how I feel about you; the strength and the depth of it. I'm afraid of getting hurt by it. I'm afraid that you don't feel the same way about me. That maybe now, with everything else going on, you've changed your mind about me." There. He'd said it. Unknown to him, a small tear rolled down his right cheek.
Josie's heart ached at the angst and longing that was obvious in Sam's voice and on his face. God, she knew that feeling; she'd lived with it for most of her life.
She pulled her chair closer, so that her knees were straddling one of his. Then she reached over and put a hand on either side of his face, tilting it up so that she could look him in the eyes. Her thumb traced the wet streak his tear had left. "What I think is that you are the sweetest, most wonderful man on the face of the planet. I think that you are so strong and brave for going through all this heartache just to be with me." Josie let her hands drop to her lap.
She paused for a moment and then confessed, "I'm afraid, too, Sam. I'm afraid that you will resent me because of having to choose between your work and I. I'm afraid that you will decide, when all is said and done, that I wasn't worth the trouble. I'm afraid that one day you'll wake up and realize you've made a horrible mistake by deciding you wanted me."
Josie let those statements register before she continued fervently, "Yet, somehow I knew we were destined to be together--even if it took me a while to admit it. We were meant for each other, Sam. When I'm with you, I feel whole…complete, like a part of me was missing before I met you and I never even realized it. I feel smart and strong and beautiful simply because you believe in me."
"I love you, Sam Coulson; I love you more than life itself. Now that I've found you, I cannot imagine my life without you in it. Every day I find that I love you more than the day before. It's a miracle that I never thought would happen to me. Please say that you feel the same for me, because I don't think I could bear it otherwise." That said, she sat back and nervously twisted her hands in her lap, anxiously awaiting his reply.
Sam stared at Josie for a moment, stunned at the magnitude of emotion in her statement. She never ceased to amaze him. Then, he reached out and gently held her hands in his, rubbing slow circles on her palms with his thumbs, trying to find the right words.
He looked straight into her eyes and answered by quoting from a Shakespearean sonnet: "So are you to my thoughts, as food to life, or as sweet- seasoned showers are to the ground. And for the peace of you I hold such strife as 'twixt a miser and his wealth be found…"
Josie's eyes filled up with tears. She knew this particular love poem well.
Earnestly, Sam continued, "Josie, I would do anything, go through anything, just to be in the same room with you, let alone be the love of your life. Once you came along, I was ruined for anyone else. You were the only one I wanted, the only one I will ever want. I love you desperately, passionately… today, tomorrow, and always."
Josie began to sob quietly, removing her hands from Sam's to cover her face. Never had she been so moved, so happy, so at peace. Then, although she was still crying, she also started to laugh. She threw her arms around Sam's neck.
Sam stood up, bringing Josie with him. He simply held her close for a moment before leaning back to look into Josie's eyes again. He'd never get tired of looking at them, he was sure of that. Inevitably, they drew him closer until their lips met in a soft, tender kiss.
After a moment, they parted, and Sam told Josie as he dried what was left of her tears, "Knowing that you love me makes all the difference. Let them do what they will to me. I have what I really want, and they cannot take them away from me. I have my true love, my self-respect, and the truth. That is all I will ever need to survive."
Josie concurred. "We'll see this thing through together, whatever the outcome." They held each other in comfortable silence. After a moment, Josie looked playful and gave Sam a nudge. "You know, we should probably eat before everything is ice cold, hint, hint."
Sam released Josie and gave her a brilliant smile. "Two plates, coming right up."
* * *
Five minutes later, they were sitting at Sam's kitchen table, eating their Chinese food with the supplied chopsticks…not very successfully.
"Josie, I appreciate that you are doing this, but please, don't expect miracles. I don't really think it will do much good," Sam explained. He caught a pea pod with his tongue and sucked it into his mouth just as it squirted out from between the wooden utensils.
"But I can't understand how" –Plop! A fat chunk of Sweet and Sour Chicken landed back on Josie's plate—"they can, in good conscience, ruin your career over a 25 year old non-student. I mean, I think it's pretty outrageous that they will not let the two people most involved give credible statements. This is supposed to be the United States of America…you know, where people are innocent until proven guilty?" Josie spouted heatedly. She glared at the offending piece of chicken as if it were the cause of all their problems. Then, she speared it viciously with one of the sticks and stuck it in her mouth.
Sam laughed at Josie's histrionics. "Please, I don't think that piece of chicken had anything to do with it."
Josie looked sheepish. "Darn thing was slippery…kept falling off my chopsticks. No wonder Chinese people tend to be thin; it must take them 3 hours to eat!"
Sam teased, "Charlie Chan wasn't thin."
Josie answered, "Yeah, but he lived in America…probably gave up these things" –she held up the chopsticks—"a long time ago…" Josie grinned.
Sam smiled in return and then shook his head. "Okay, getting back to the school board…I don't know what else we can do other than what we're already doing. I mean…you're going to meet with Jack, which I appreciate, but I don't think it will help much. He is sympathetic, I think, but his hands are tied. At the hearing, we can make our opinions known, but I doubt they'll hold much weight. Other than that, I think we are just at their mercy."
"I refuse to accept that. There has GOT to be something more that can be done. Maybe we're missing something. I'm going to find that something." Josie sounded determined.
Sam admired Josie's strength and courage. "Well," he said after a moment, "if anyone can figure a way out of this, it would be you…"
Josie beamed at his compliment. Then she spied the clock on the stove over Sam's shoulder. It said 1:10. "Yipe!" she exclaimed, standing up. "It's already past one!"
Sam looked at his watch and saw that she was right. "It only takes about ten minutes to get there from here, but, yeah, you should get going."
"Which way to the bathroom? I've got to freshen up before I leave…I don't think the 'very thoroughly kissed' look will win any points, if you know what I mean…" Josie finished dryly.
Sam rejoined, eyes twinkling, "Or the 'I have duck sauce on the side of my face' look, either. Personally, I happen to like the 'very thoroughly kissed' look, though." Josie looked at him drolly, but then she smiled. "Oh, the bathroom is that way," he said, pointing out the kitchen door to the left.
She grabbed her pocketbook and headed in the direction he had indicated.
After a moment she emerged, looking as pristine as she had when she arrived. "Boy, that was fast!" Sam commented.
Josie smiled. "Thanks, I think." She grabbed one last piece of chicken, put it in her mouth, and then sucked the sauce off her fingers one by one.
Sam felt his mouth go dry in response. He put a finger inside his shirt collar and tugged at it uncomfortably. It seemed awfully warm in the kitchen all of a sudden.
Unaware of Sam's discomfort, Josie continued, "Okay, gotta go. Wish me luck." She leaned down and gave Sam a quick peck on the lips.
Recovering, Sam replied, "Good luck. But don't get your hopes up too much, okay?"
Josie patted his shoulder comfortingly as she walked by him out of the kitchen and toward the front door. She paused after opening the door. "Hey, I'll have to go back to the office for a while after this, so I'll see you after work, all right?"
"That's just fine. I'll see you later. I'll be very interested to hear what Jack tells you."
Josie answered, "So will I."
* * *
Josie arrived at the school with just a few minutes to spare. She was glad that it was between periods, because she just wasn't in the mood to deal with any of the students right now. She walked up the front steps of the high school and continued down the main hallway to the administrative offices.
As she entered, a plump, middle-aged woman stood up and offered her hand. "Josie Geller, I presume," she said, shaking Josie's hand. "I'm Anne Lucent, Principal Kerdan's secretary." She gestured toward a seat by her desk. "He will be with you shortly. Would you like to sit and wait?"
Josie accepted the offer and sat down. "Thank you," she replied.
After a moment, the secretary leaned toward her and said with a quiet voice, "It's really too bad about Sam. He's a real sweetie. But then," Mrs. Lucent smiled, "you already know that, don't you?"
Josie found herself returning the woman's smile. "Yes, I do."
"It just doesn't seem right, somehow," Mrs. Lucent continued, more to herself than to Josie. "I mean, considering the situation…but I suppose I shouldn't be talking about this, even to you." She smiled, looking a little embarrassed.
"I understand," Josie replied. "But I'm glad you feel that way, in any case."
Mrs. Lucent looked as if she were about to say more, but then the intercom buzzed on the side of her desk. "Mrs. Lucent?" it squawked. She leaned over and pushed the "talk" button, "Yes?"
"Send Ms. Geller in now. I'm ready for her," came the reply.
"Yes, sir, Mr. Kerdan. Right away." Mrs. Lucent turned to Josie and said unnecessarily, "You may go in now."
Josie stood and thanked the woman again and then headed for the door marked "Principal John Kerdan". As she arrived at the doorway, Jack Kerdan opened the door and ushered her inside. "Please, Ms. Geller, have a seat."
"Thank you," she replied. "And please, call me Josie." She sat and crossed her legs, resting a legal pad on top of them.
"All right, Josie. And please, call me Jack. Now," he started, all business, "what is it that you'd like to know about Sam Coulson's suspension?"
"Well, I'd first like you to verify that the reason behind his predicament is because of me and no other reason," Josie said plainly.
"The best answer I can give you is yes and no. Yes, it was because of the questionable relationship the two of you forged that concerned the school board and led to his suspension. But also no, because the real concern is Sam's part in it, not yours," Jack explained.
"But it really makes no sense to me," Josie rejoined. "If I was never seventeen and never really his student, doesn't that make the issue of 'underage relations' rather moot?"
"In the strictest sense, yes it does. Certainly no one could go out and file criminal charges against him in this case. However, the issue is less about your actual age and more about the age that Sam thought you were when he carried on his acquaintance with you. As I'm sure he could tell you, being a teacher carries very big responsibilities: to the school, to the students, to the parents, to the community. One of those responsibilities is to maintain a professional distance from one's students. In this case, the school board has its doubts that Sam was able to maintain that professional distance with you, considering his attraction to you," Jack concluded.
"But there is a big difference between having feelings for someone and acting upon those feelings," Josie argued. "Just because Sam had those feelings for me does not mean that anything untoward happened between us. In fact, it didn't."
"I believe you. Unfortunately, the school board will probably not due to your current connection to him. Please understand that they need to be extra careful in this case due to its public nature. They will err on the side of caution simply for the protection of the students."
"I want you to know that I am not condoning with the way the school board is handling this, however I do understand where they are coming from and that places me in a difficult position," said Jack.
"So you mean to tell me that the board is willing to ruin a man's career over the possibility that he MAY have done some small thing wrong that would have crossed the line of professionalism? Surely this is not constitutional?" Josie asked.
"I don't know about its legality, Josie, but the reality is that unless you can give the board more concrete proof than your word about the nature of your relationship with Sam Coulson, they will never allow him to come back to South Glen South," Jack said.
"Oh, and one more thing, Ms. Geller," he continued. "The school board has informed me that they will convene this Friday evening to disclose its decision in this matter."
"I hope you understand, Mr. Kerdan, that I intend to fight this every step of the way," Josie insisted, as she stood up.
Jack Kerdan stood as well. He smiled slightly and replied, "I wouldn't have expected anything less. Personally, I'd like to see you succeed. I'd hate to lose a teacher as gifted as Sam to something like this."
"Thank you, Jack. I'm sure you'll be seeing me again," Josie said. With that, she turned on her heel and strode from the office, leaving a rather stunned Jack Kerdan staring after her. No wonder Sam loved this woman, he thought. She was quite remarkable.
* * *
Josie glanced at her watch as she left the administrative office. 2:10. Almost time for school to let out for the day. She strode purposely down the halls, finally ending up in front of Aldys' locker. She leaned back against the wall and waited.
Within a minute, the bell releasing the students from their last class sounded, and teenagers swarmed the halls. Many students looked at her strangely as they walked by, but no one said anything. After a moment, Aldys appeared in the throng and surfaced next to Josie.
"Hey, Josie," Aldys began, "what are you doing here?"
"I just got out of a meeting with Principal Kerdan," she said, pulling Aldys aside out of the stream of exiting students.
"Uh-oh. What's up with Mr. Coulson?" asked Aldys. "Is it bad?"
"It's bad, all right," Josie concurred. "They suspended him this morning. He's under investigation for 'influencing a minor' charges."
"Because of you? That doesn't make much sense, does it?"
"Well, I certainly didn't think so. But the school board is quite adamant about making these charges stick," Josie replied.
"How's Mr. Coulson taking it?" inquired Aldys.
"He was pretty shook up about it when it happened, as I'm sure you can imagine, but he's doing a bit better now," answered Josie, smiling as she thought of her 'lunch date' with Sam and the things they'd said.
"Listen, Aldys," Josie continued, "I've got an idea of something that may help, but I'm going to need your assistance with it."
"Sure," she replied. "Anything I can do."
"Great!" said Josie enthusiastically. "We don't have much time, because the hearing is on Friday. Now, this is what I want you to do…"
* * *