Please let me know what you think. Email me here.
* * *
Sam slowly walked into Josie's living room. Looking around, he took in his surroundings: all the smells that reminded him of Josie bombarded him from every angle. Everything was neat and tidy and all in place. It was homey and sweet; pretty much how he pictured it would look.
"Wow! You have tortoises?" asked Sam when he spotted their tank on the floor next to the love seat. He was too nervous to jump right into his explanation. He needed a buffer, and this was it.
Josie nodded in response, not trusting her voice at that moment.
He walked over and crouched down beside their tank to study them carefully. "So what are their names?" he inquired, not taking his eyes off the two sleeping turtles. When Josie didn't respond, Sam stood up and turned around. Josie was nowhere in sight.
"Josie?" he called out, confused. "Where did you go?"
"I'm right here," said Josie as she re-entered the living room from a side door. Sam noticed something tucked under her arm. Then he smiled. It was a towel.
"Here, catch," she called as she tossed it to him. With quick reflexes honed from his years of playing hockey, Sam caught the towel with just one hand.
"Thanks," he said with a smile. He pulled the towel over his head, using his hands to dry his wet hair. When he was satisfied his hair was dry enough, he removed the towel from his head and placed it around his neck so that the ends hung over each of his shoulders.
Josie couldn't help but laugh. Now, instead of Sam's hair being all wet, it was sticking out in all directions as if a porcupine sat on his head.
"What?" asked Sam, a little embarrassed, not knowing why Josie was laughing at him.
"I'm sorry," Josie replied, still giggling, "but your hair looks so cute sticking up on end like that�"
"Oh, right. Okay," smiled Sam, sliding his fingers through his unruly hair, trying to push it back into place.
Sobering, Sam began, "Hey Josie, we really need to talk," as the smile fell from his face. He knew he had been putting it off, but he really did owe her an explanation of what had happened tonight. She deserved at least that much, no matter what she decided to do after that.
"I know," said Josie. She kept her eyes trained on the carpet; too afraid to look up and see what secrets Sam's eyes held. She was too afraid to believe in his love, and she didn't want to see his pity.
"Uh�well�why don't you have a seat?" Josie stumbled over her words while motioning her hand toward the sofa.
Sam had to smile. "Frankly, I would love to, but I'm pretty wet and I don't want to soak your couch�" he said, tugging on a wet pant leg. "I'm creating a puddle as it is. But please, you go ahead and sit�I'll manage."
"Okay," said Josie, slowly lowering herself down onto the sofa. Sam kneeled down in front of her so his chest was barely touching her knees. He placed both his hands on top of hers, which were placed lightly on her lap.
He cleared his throat, ready to begin. He silently prayed that she would believe him, because if she didn't� He didn't want to think about that; couldn't think about it, or else he'd never begin. Then, so she'd know he was sincere in every word he was going to say, he looked deeply into her eyes and started to speak.
"Josie, I want to start by telling you how incredibly sorry I am�for not believing in you, for not giving you a chance to explain, and above all�for leaving you all alone out on that baseball field tonight. I know this will sound completely absurd, but I never saw your article, never heard about it on the radio, never saw anything about it on the news before the game."
Sam smiled wryly and continued, "I'm sure that sounds pretty unreal, because by the sounds of things I was the only one in Chicago who didn't know. But I swear to you that I didn't. I didn't know anything about it until it was too late. I finally found out by seeing you on the news, standing all alone out on that huge field and then walking off in tears because I didn't come. It just ripped my heart straight out of my chest. I felt like the world's biggest fool. I was so angry with myself for not being there for you when you needed me the most."
Sam stopped to take a deep breath, and then continued, "Josie� I love you. I have loved you since that very first day I saw you in my English class. I looked into your eyes and felt this amazing rush. It was something I had never ever felt before, a feeling that no other person alive has ever caused me to feel. And every moment I spent with you only made the feeling grow stronger and stronger until I felt that I would burst trying to keep it inside of me. Against all logic and reason I knew I had to be with you. As I'm sure you've realized, I was going to tell you all this at the Prom."
"But when I heard you tell that crowd that you were really an undercover reporter and how hard you had been trying to impress them, I naturally assumed that included me. I felt my world cave in around me. And then it all seemed to click in my head; why you were so charming and earnest in trying to win my trust�and more. I assumed that I was your story, and I felt like I took the bait and was caught hook, line, and sinker. I don't know what hurt me more�the thought that you could do that to me, you know, use me to get a good story; or the thought that the woman I was passionately in love with and wanted to spend the rest of my life with didn't even exist but was nothing more than a fabrication."
The tears gathering in Josie's eyes and rolling down her cheeks were almost Sam's undoing, but he knew he had to finish his apology to her at all costs. He closed his eyes and went on, "After that, I wanted so badly to hate you, to push you out of my heart forever. But even then, the feelings just wouldn't disappear. They just got clouded over with anger and grief and fear. I didn't go outside the front door of my apartment for three days. I moped; I raged; I cried. I couldn't eat and I barely slept. And when I did sleep, it was fitful because it was filled with dreams of you."
Sam felt a lump beginning to form in his throat but he had to continue. "But it was only after it was too late that I realized you weren't out to hurt me, that you were trying to protect me, and that all we had shared together was real. And I knew then that I had to come. I knew I had to tell you how sorry I am and to beg for your forgiveness. If you can only find a way to give me another chance to be in your life, I swear that you will never again have to feel pain as bad as you felt tonight, because I'm going to spend every waking moment making sure of it."
Josie removed her hands from his to place them over her face as she openly wept. Sam's heart sank. He had failed. By coming here, by telling her how he felt now, after it was too late, he had only hurt her more.
But then she looked up, stared into his eyes, and smiled. "My God, that is the sweetest thing anyone has ever said to me�" She only just managed to say.
"Well, do you think that maybe you can forgive me for being such a pigheaded imbecile?" asked Sam with a wry smile.
Josie laughed. "Sam Coulson, how could I not forgive you? I love you." She leaned closer to Sam and pressed her lips firmly against his forehead.
Sam closed his eyes, letting the warmth from Josie's lips course through his body. He placed both hands on the either side of her face and gently pushed her head away from his. Looking deep into her eyes he asked softly, "Josie Geller, may I kiss you?"
Josie let out a soft giggle and rolled her eyes. Her only reply was, "What do you think?"
Sam's eyes darkened and he answered seriously, "I think you are driving me crazy," as he leaned in towards her. He suddenly felt like a 12 year old again moving in for his first kiss: butterflies in his stomach, heart pounding, and sweaty palms. But as soon as his lips touched Josie's all his emotions ran wild. He felt like someone had lifted a ton of bricks off his back. He could finally kiss her without feeling guilty about it. He pulled her against him and deepened their kiss even more.
It felt like hours had passed as Sam started to slow down their kisses, knowing they both had to come up for air. Sam gazed into Josie's eyes, still amazed how someone's eyes could make him feel so many different things.
Sam let out a big sigh and said, "God! That felt good�" not realising he'd actually said this aloud. It wasn't until he registered the shocked and amused look on Josie's face that he understood his faux pas. He tried to think of something funny and witty to cover himself, but nothing came. He shook his head in embarrassment.
Luckily, Josie came to his rescue. "Actually," Josie admitted, still giggling, "I thought that was better than good�it was amazing!"
"Yes, exactly," agreed Sam, touching the side of her face tenderly.
After a moment of silence between them, Josie blurted out, "Brian and Norma."
"Huh?" said Sam, looking really confused.
"My tortoises," Josie explained, pointing to their tank. "That's their names. You asked me that earlier when I was getting you the towel�"
"Oh, yeah. Right," said Sam turning to look at them again. "Why Brian and Norma?" asked Sam with an amused smile.
"Well�" said Josie, "When we were younger my cousin Will used to own two tortoises that he had named Brian and Norma. Every time I went over to his house I just had to play with them. I was fascinated by them. But then one day I was playing with them and I forgot to put them back in their tank. They wandered off and we never saw them again. Even though it was many years ago and he had long since forgiven me, I thought I kinda owed it to Will to name mine after the ones I had lost."
"Oh Josie that's really thoughtful," said Sam with a loving smile. "You really are amazing."
Josie blushed and self-consciously tucked a piece of hair behind her ear. "Sam," she said, looking down at him; he was still kneeling on the floor. "Wouldn't you like to get into some dry clothes? Or would you rather stay in those wet ones all night?" she asked, running her fingers down the front of his soaking wet shirt.
"Well, that might be a bit difficult since all my clothes and everything else I own are on the way to New York�" he explained.
"New York?" repeated Josie, giving Sam a confused look.
"It's a long story," said Sam with a sigh, "but if you want to hear it, I will tell you�"
"Okay. But before you tell me, I think we better get you out of those clothes," Josie said with a wink.
Sam raised an eyebrow and asked, "Josie� What are you suggesting?"
"Come with me and find out," Josie answered, pulling Sam toward her bedroom.
"Josie, I'm not going to wear your clothes," laughed Sam, as they got closer to her room. "I don't think they'd fit�"
"I wasn't suggesting that," said Josie seriously, and shut the bedroom door behind them.
* * *