| Harry Potter Shoutouts Very famous--includiong a few quotes and wise words from the Professor of all time--Albus Dumbledore |
| Famous quote from Yoda--Courage leads to fear. Fear leads to anger.Anger leads to hatred. Hatred leads to....suffering. |
| My friend's mother always told my friend that he was first born in a garbage can. |
| Harry Potter himself---a.k.a. Potty--I could tackle anything sent to me! Perhaps a dementor--boggart--Riddikulus! Expecto Patronum! See all the skills I've mastered! Oh, yeah--Avada Kedavra! Hey! Whatta hell's wrong with my wand now??? |
| Ron Weasley--a.k.a. Weasel--Aahhhh...no Moody not the spiders(backs away) I have arachnophobia, please, yeowwch!!! Hey it's kinda tingly down here. Harry can you give me a hand? The idiot--I mean Moody--no, Crouch's son--his spider, it's even worse than a black widow!!! |
| Hermione Granger--Tut, tut...haven't you ever read The Standard Book of Spells, Grade 3? No, Ron? Then you're even more retarded than I thought you were. No, duh, everyone should also know how to levitate feathers! |
| Fred Weasley--How about it, George? Let's go to Zonko's Joke Shop in Hogsmeade for more Ton-Tongue Toffees! We could use it on our special victim--the porky guy, Harry's cousin, er, George, what's his name again? Dopey? I know it starts with a d....hmmm, let's see, we'll call him Dorky! |
| George Weasley--Yeah, I'm gonna get more of them Ton-Tongue Toffees in Hogsmeade for sure. You never know when that Marauder's Map comes in handy! Surely Filch is an idiot...oh well, if he isn't, we'll sneak up some retarded potion on his brain and we'll sneak up there! By the way...we're missing someone. Harry, are you there in your invisibility cloak? |
| Albus Dumbledore--Well, well, Harry, a tip of mind to soothe your brain: Not all wizards are good you know, for example, Voldemort killed many so our members of the ministry decided to form an alliance for power to kick Voldemort's butt.............. |
| Minerva McGonagall--Well, here you first years are, making a mess of our castle! One million points from Slythrin for no reason at all and a million points to Gryffindor! Haha my house rules! As for you there, Severus, you suck! The house cup is to Gryffindor! Hell yeah this feels good! (Snape's stomach--Gurgle) |
| Severus Snape--Ah, yes, pity...Potter, our new celebrity. Pity it won't last long, Potter...cause what's the difference between boomslang skin and a werewolf? Ah, I knew it, you don't know..a retarded boy being a celebrity isn't valuable at all...tut, tut...clearly fame isn't everything, and, oh, I forgot (grins) and I will take off 200 points from Gryffindor. Class dismissed, and Potter, you stay in for detention. |
| Rubeus Hagrid--Ah, Filch, Hermione, Draco, Harry, and Neville are staying in for detention? huhhuh...I understand..all right. Okay, guys, this is it. We're going to the Forbidden Forest. And you might guess what you're gonna do there...Well, Malfoy, since you're a jerk you go in there first. If you don't come back within the hour we'll take you as dead. Have a nice corpse. As for you three(points at Potter, Granger, and Longbottom) for detention you know what you're gonna do? Free time! Get to roam around the forest I don't care! I'm tired! (falls to sleep) |
| Argus Filch--Ah...what are you kids running around the night? Wait till Dumbledore hears about this. Yoo hoo Dumbledore, I caught three jerks running around here. Mrs. Norris you get to spit on them. All right I don't give a damn I'm a Squib. Squib. (louder). SQUIB. SQUIB!!! Like Longbottom. (JUst then..raucous noise around the hall). PEEVES! I'll get you now! Don't worry kids you can go back to your dormitories and you guys are off the hook of mean, nasty Filch. HAHAHA!!! UNtil next time... |
| Draco Malfoy--Oh yeah Mudbloods beware!!! Draco bloodsucker is here!!! Bite Hermione Granger's skin! All right, Crabbe and Goyle! Destroy Potter! Get POtter Stinks badges! As for you, Weasley...can;t afford your books eh? If gold were brains you'd even be more retarded than Longbottom here. Same goes to you, Longbottom...your lack of common sense annoys me. I heard that you're a Squib. Lucky you're not a Mudblood like Hermione Granger. The Gryffindors are stupid and poor. Look at Potter, follow his example. No parents...pity. No one to take care of the famous Potter. Weasley...you got no dough. LOngbottom..no brains. As for Granger, who tries to be perfect in every way...isn't. Granger's a MUDBLOOD, everyone! |
| Percy Weasley--a.k.a. Weatherby--Now,Now, Fred, right now's definitely not the time to be bothering me! The Crouch man has assigned me the slave labor work! (sticks nose up in the air). Besides your stupid wisecracks are always so lame. Oh, whatta heck...I'm one lazy Weasley then. I don't care anymore...let's party time! (grabs some Chocolate Frogs and Bernie Blott's Every Flavor Beans). Hmm...this one's a booger flavor...blecchhh! It tastes like Fred's disgusting saliva! Wait a sec...how do I even know if it's Fred's saliva unless I tasted it??? Blech! Oh forget it...old Crouch is wanting his Weatherby back again... coming, old Crouch... |
| Arthur Weasley--Now now Harry what are these tiny things? What--they're eckeltric plugs? Cool! Eckeltricity is the most interesting thingy of the Muggle world! Well, even if wizarding technology is better the thingies the Muggles have are more interesting to note. Oh well...the ministry doesn't care about these plugs...but let's see what Fudge would say if I gave him a shock! |
| Molly Weasley--All right, Fred! That's enough! I don't care about your excuses--Accio! Accio! Hey what are these things? (picks up the thing) Eew, Fred, man...are these your toffees? Goodness gracious, hiding them in your pocket too! I'm confiscating them! Oh lord, it's not a toffee...one of their fake wands again! Oh, those two..(referring to Fred and George) causing trouble again. Wait till I kill them...I mean, literally! I got to practice my Avada Kedavras more often now. Or at least they should go to Azkban. Sirrius Black's there too...hey, Harry, is that a black dog on our doorstep? Check it out...Oh no! That's Sirius Black! (faints) |
| Cornelius Fudge--Hello there, wizards and witches! Today in this meeting I proposed a special reunion for the whole wizarding world for the annual event--the Triwizard Tournament! The winner gets 1000 galleons--anyone willing to die for it? Well, here's the side effects. As you all know, only wizards or witches between the ages 20 and 30 are allowed to go. We changed that rule. Too bad, Fleur, Cedric, Viktor, and Harry, but the Galleons aren't for he taking now. Secondly, the loser with the least points throughout the Tournament will, sadly, as I say, get killed with the Avada Kedavra Curse. So, anyone willing to join the tournament this year? (silence) |
| Voldemort--a.k.a Tom Marvolo Riddle, You-Know Who--Well, well, Death Eaters, we meet again for 13 years. And this time, I vow to kick Potter's butt, I mean kill him, like how I did to his parents. Wormtail, I oughta kill you right now. Not that you're unloyal to me, but I just feel like it. My anger lies on you, Wormtail, for no heck of a reason at all! And I, Voldemort, will be the most powerful wizard of all time! Dumbledore will fall at my heels and I will be the bomb! No, not literally! Nooooo!!!!!! BAM!!!! (bomb explodes) |
| Barty Crouch--Well, well, Weatherby, complete that job you've been assigned to do. You other ministry members will do to my bidding. As for me, I shall have relaxation. Winky, give me all the beer you can muster! (grabs beer) Thank you. Uhhhh....(gets drunk) Man, the planet's sky seems so purple....Aaahhhhh! There's You-Know-Who!!! |
| Sirius Black--a.k.a. Snuffles, Padfoot--All right, Harry, the boy's at Hogwarts. I got to concentrate, Oh whatta heck where's Peter now? The Scabbers guy, I bet that jerk Ron Weasley has him. Hey! I can predict the future! I'm still at Azkaban, where those darn dementors are guarding me...and I see this hippogriff Buckbeak and me flying away and Potter and Granger waves at me. Then, I see me as a dog eating drumsticks in the faraway points of Hogsmeade. Holy cow! Me and Potter are making friends? And people suspect that I was gonna kill him! |
| Ludo Bagman--Well, well, any bets for money that Bulgaria's gonna kick Ireland's butt in the Quidditch game? What? Both of you bet three million galleons, 1789 sickles, 4900 Knuts? You can't be serious? Do you even have that much gold? It's a bet! I know Ireland's gonna win anyway!There's Krum...who can be the sport now??? Let's just watch the game then! (after the game) Huh? Whoa? Ireland won? Wait a sec...They must have cheated! Aw, man, now I owe you boys three million galleons, 1789 sickles and 4900 Knuts? That's nearly all my money! |
| Next shoutouts next time on: 1. Lucius Malfoy 2. R.J. Lupin 3. Cedric Diggory 4. Fleur Delacour 5. Viktor Krum 6. Peter Pettigrew 7. Ginny Weasley 8. Oliver Wood 9. Colin Creevey 10. Mr. Ollivander |