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| Explaining What Never Was by � chibilunacat You picked me up from the floor, Where I lay broken and sad, And watched me disappear before you- For I was never there. Misconception, unreality is ending- In front of you with every lie, My persuasive destiny shattered, Reconstructed, and shot away. I was reacting to a situation, I was not even ready for, And you were protecting someone else, You thought was lying on the ground. Just for the record I wasn't lonely, No not exactly you see, I was merely sad and lacking The friends I had once before. When you dried up my blood, With your scrap of torn tee shirt, Did you notice my patient smile While I reopened the healing wounds? When the door opened behind you Did you finally come to look, No you watched me fade away, Wondering who I even was. You know that I was never there, And you repeat the cycle again. You tear the shirt that's never ripped And wipe at blood that never was. You are holding on to something dear- And I am wrong for allowing, But I can't help but watch you try To fix a broken wing that was removed. My back is against the wall, I sit here on a wooden floor, My knees are up against my chest, My tears continue to fall. You are fading, right before me, And I forgot what you look like, I was holding you, thanking you, crying, And I have no idea why. But I wasn't ever really lonely, I didn't need to be, with dreams- And you were never really patching up, The wounds I carved on me. I never really watched you, You never really held on- But we were grateful for one another, In dreams, Inside, in lies. We both reached out, with bleeding arms To hold on to some dream, And witnessed something beyond belief, And simply did not know why. Maybe we were never there, Maybe then we were, But is it wrong to need someone, That's only in your mind? Terra Mae 1/24/2002 |