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| The Day of The Crow by � artnsolitude It was just another morning for Ray Prescott. He was nearing the end of his nightly run and was really looking forward to getting some sack time. The company had been running him pretty hard for the last few nights and this one was no exception. As he made his way down that familiar highway to his company's terminal, his mind kept drifting back to when he was a child, playing in the woods near his home, when he had no other responsibility other than to go to school, do his homework and play in the woods. He would spend hours out there, digging, climbing, trying his best to move with as little noise as possible. Trying to be the best little indian he could be. He thought often of those days, and he was sure this wouldn't be the last time. He felt like his life was at a standstill, like he wasn't doing with it what he needed to. He felt like he was wasting away, and there wasn't a damn thing he could do about it. While all of his friends had gone off to college, learning useful things, things that would advance them along the path of financial success, he had been engaged in a private study of religion and spirituality, and a fat lot of good it had done his wallet. Here he sits, still burnin' up the highways like his daddy used to say, as he had done since he was old enough to touch the pedals of his Chevy Malibu Wagon. At that age, all he had wanted to do was drive, now he just wanted not to drive, and didn't care if he ever drove again. Ever. He wouldn't miss it. It had served it's purpose and now it's time was at an end. He smiled again thinking of those woods, all the pines and old scrub oak. More like woody weeds than oaks, best he could remember. Yeah, the woods were great. That's where he wanted to be. Just walking down any trail he chose at a whim. Any old deer trail would do. He felt close to the creator there. Isn't that what life was all about, searching for the creator? Becoming one with Him? Remembering mankind's spiritual heritage? His divine connection to Him? Ray knew that most people spend an eternity searching for something to give their lives meaning. They have no idea what they are searching for, they only know that they need. They hunger and thirst for it throughout their lives, with no direction, no course, no guide for how to attain it. Always in a hurry, getting closer to death every day. Perhaps hungering for another life, another opportunity to do what they had been unable to do with this one. Maybe, just maybe, they hope in vain that in the next life their circumstance will be different and they will finally understand, they will finally get it. Ray understood that very well, wishing for another life, another circumstance. Always wishing he could start over again, be somebody else, do something else. Ray smiled at his own lack of vision. Hadn't he, merely by acknowledging to the spirit, the universe, that he knew the truth, set himself on a course that was different than those other lost souls fruitlessly searching? Had he not carved himself a new path, blazing the trail for his next life, or whatever world that follows, while still stuck in this one. He knew that it didn't matter what he did for a living in this world. It simply wasn't important how much money he made or didn't make. The truly important things were of the soul, of the spirit. He knew it, he believed it, but somehow the world still managed to catch him wishing. It was so easy for him to forget, so easy to become entangled in the meaninglessness of this world. This must be the devil's second greatest trick, arranging for the lures and temptations of this world of deception to come between humanity and their God. Making them forget. He snapped back to the world as a murder of crows flew up from the roadside in front of him. Most flew off to the side to safety, but one remained dead center in front of his truck, looking back as he lost ground to the rig. Ray hit the brakes, hard, hoping he wouldn't hurt the crow. He didn't need the bad karma, besides, maybe crow had something to teach him. He couldn't rule it out. He checked both mirrors but didn't see what became of the bird. He could only hope for the best and kept his truck headed east, toward home. Guides. Spirit guides. A concept to some, a reality to him, that most would consider nothing more than delusion. Ray never spoke of it to his friends, never spoke of his guides for fear of ridicule. "Pearls before swine" he would remind himself whenever he felt the temptation to tell his white friends about bear. What good would it do them? They won't believe because they can't see, but to see, they must first believe. That's the whole crux of the problem. He must find those who realize that faith is more powerful than belief. Faith that there is always more to the truth than is seen at first glance, like the seven-eighths of the iceberg below water. He desapired that he would ever find people like that. But the guides had so much to teach them if he could convince them of the truth. Nature was once considered the great library by the old ones. Hawks, eagles, bears, even crows had something to teach, they were all guides to the good red road, pointers toward the path. Without guides, it would be nearly impossible to stay on the path, impossible to find meaning to life. Even with guides, it was difficult. It had been ten years since bear had come to him. He had been like all the other lost souls, searching for meaning behind his father's untimely death, when bear entered his dreams. He had approached slowly in his dream form, walking carefully on all fours so as not to intimidate his ward. Ray had been frightened at first, not knowing what to expect, but he knew that it was only a dream. He had been a lucid dreamer since he was a child, since long before he knew what the word meant, so he was not afraid of dream dying. It was just another lesson to be learned. Dreams always held some deeper meaning that must be interpreted. But somehow, this was different. He knew that his life was about to change in ways he could little predict. In all the years since, bear never said anything, he was just...there. Often it would come to him in his dreams, standing nearby, watching him. Even when he couldn't see him, Ray could feel his presence, on the edge of sight, out of the corner of his eye. He became a welcome friend, the bear, a comfort, and though never a word was spoken, somehow Ray knew that he was being protected. As he looked back over his life, he began to recognize that bear had always been there, had always been a part of him. Present in his emotions, his movements, in his thoughts, in his personality, in his temper, OH yes, in his temper. That's when bear really showed himself. Whenever Ray was upset or felt threatened, bear was there with him, fighting alongside him, fighting from inside him. As if bear had taken over his essence in order to protect him. It was awesome when that happened, the rage, the strength, the power that was bear. But as Ray was soon to find, it didn't end with bear, there were other spirit guides waiting to join with him also. From the time he learned that every creature under the dominion of the Great Spirit had something to teach, they all seemed to stand in line to join with him, to become one with him. Ray thought with mingled pride and humility the earth spirits that had come to share their knowledge with him. After each lesson was learned, he would somehow be given, awarded, find or otherwise acquire a small token from the earth spirit that had been instructing him. He considered the contents of his medicine bundle as a history of his spiritual travels. From snake, he had learned of regeneration, that all things return to their beginning, and had been given a rib of a rattler. From squirrel, he had learned to prepare for the future and not to squander what has been given, and he was given a squirrel foot from a squirrel carcass that was given to a friend by an owl. It had been nearly dropped on his head by the owl. Ray smiled whenever he thought of it. When he learned the lesson of deception, or rather, had gained the ability to see through the world of deception, and cast it aside, he had come upon an owl feather. When he made friends with the hawk, and learned the lessons of wariness and foresight, he had been given hawk feathers. When he learned the lesson of communion with the Great Spirit, he had been given a tuft of eagle down. And the list goes on. But it seemed that the earth spirits had learned about Ray Prescott, they knew that though he was devoted to the care of earth mother, and to his earth spirit brethren, he could find little time these days to meet them on their terms, in their woodland homes. So they came to him. At least that's what it seemed like to Ray. Home at last. Ray pulled through the open gate, turned the tractor and the trailing set of doubles into the company yard and proceeded to break down the set. Once finished, he pulled his tractor around to his normal parking spot, facing the fence, and filled out the endless stack of paperwork before bothering to get out and complete his posttrip report on the condition of his vehicle. With a practiced ease resulting from ten years of practice, he hopped down out of the truck to do his walk around for the posttrip - left side hood latch, released; fuel level, one half; left side tires, good, inflated; airlines, light cord, stowed; right side rear tires, good; right side fuel, one half tank; right side hood latch, open; move to front to open hood for oil level check ..... Ray stopped dead in his tracks, unable to think or move, momentarily transfixed by an odd mixture of fascination and revulsion. He sat down involuntarily, with an audible whump, and tried to make sense of what he was seeing, moreover, the reason he was seeing it. There, it's tail end wedged in the inch and a half gap between the oversized fibreglass front bumper and the grill, was the crow, hanging head down, wings splayed out, reaching for the ground, spread in full splendor as if praying to the earth spirits below. Ray leaned forward and lifted the small head of the crow, nearly in tears for having taken the life of this beautiful bird. He closed his eyes in a prayer for forgiveness, and at once began to feel at peace. He had honored the Crow, giving thanks for it's sacrifice, now it seemed the Crow was rewarding him with this feeling of peace. He had been given the feathers of this bird in thanks, and he would find some honorable and useful purpose for the gift. Ray thought hard to remember what he had learned about Crow. First, they represented law. Hmm. More than that. They represented Universal law. The truth about the universe and about religion. More. The ancients would keep their tomes of universal law in books covered in crow feathers. That was it. But what could he derive from this small knowledge? Why had this bird sacrificed itself, if that was in truth what had happened? What had he been thinking about when he first saw the crows? Was it.........knowing the truth? Seeing through the deception? Universal law and remembering that what he does in this life is of little importance, that it's the divine connection to the Great Spirit that really matters? Yes that was it. This was his reward for having learned the lesson of Universal law. That all religions are one, and only dogma and history separated them. He was being rewarded for walking a different path than his unseeing neighbors and friends. Ray smiled at the comfort that came from having his direction confirmed. He would continue to spread the word about the truth of Universal law. He would keep the records of his teachings in a book bound with feathers of the crow. Crow would be honored. Bear smiled. art |