| Tonight was crazy. My friends and I went on a road trip during the night. All of our parents thought we were going to Madison (10-20 minutes away), we went to Milwaukee (1.5 hours �2 hours away). I was sure that we were going to get lost and die. In fact, I explained very thoroughly to everyone that was there that we would most definitely get lost and die, in that order. I explained that we must get lost before we die, and that dieing immediately will follow the getting lost. |
| I suppose now would be a good time to tell you exactly who was there. Alex, Ryan, Megan, and I went on this venture. Alex drove his �ghetto sled� station wagon. I put the quotes around �ghetto sled� because the station wagon does not have the back of the body hanging farther down than the front, so the body of the car is not at an angle, as the words �ghetto sled� imply. Ryan and Megan kind of have a thing. I don�t really know if they are calling themselves boyfriend and girlfriend yet, but that�s what I consider them. So, they sat together in the back seat. It was good, because we had two people in the back seat, so everyone was included. If there is one person in the back seat, usually that person gets totally ignored. It was just too hard to ignore half the car. So we all talked to each other. I, then, of course, sat in the passenger�s seat. The driver�s bitch seat. The soda/onionrings+spicysauce/map bitch. |
| First, before we went to Milwaukee, we went to Brownsville. Brownsville is a place that we didn�t know existed until last Saturday. We saw a sign that said �Brownsville, 12 miles�. I thought nothing of it; Ryan and Alex desperately wanted to visit Brownsville. We didn�t go that night. But tonight we went there. We were afraid we wouldn�t make it, or that we missed it, or something. You see, we had been driving for what seemed a lot more than twelve miles since we saw the aforementioned sign. So, in response to this confusion: we kept driving. I was sure we were going to get lost and die. Eventually, we did get to Brownsville. Brownsville has a population of 415 people. Can you believe it? Alex and Ryan said that we would go bowling in Brownsville; I said that Brownsville would never have a bowling alley. They had one. We found it. It had about five or six lanes. We didn�t even bowl there. Alex and Ryan just found it to piss me off. So, I was wrong. Brownsville does have a bowling alley. A sad, dinky, baby-sized bowling alley. |
| We took a picture of the Welcome to Brownsville sign. Ryan was the only one with a camera, and he only had one picture left. He took a picture of the �Welcome to Brownsville� sign, with Megan standing next to it. Alex was mad because he wanted the car in the picture too, to prove that he was there too. Oh well, we all know that Alex drove us, and that he was there. |
| We stopped at the Amoco in Brownsville to get some Brownsville water. You see, Ryan drinks a lot of water. A lot. And he really needed some water. But when he filled his water bottle with Brownsville water, we wouldn�t let him drink it. We plan on labeling it, and keeping it forever. Or at least until the novelty has worn off. Also, in the Amoco, we asked for directions to Milwaukee, we got the directions, and were on our way. I was sure we were going to get lost and die. |
| We drove and we drove. We saw civilization. That was exciting. We stopped at a Burger King. Alex was hungry. Megan, luckily, had five dollars worth of Burger King gift certificates. I was in charge of Alex�s oversized soda (it didn�t fit in the cup holder, it was that big). I was also in charge of finding the spicy sauce. Dipping Alex�s onion rings in the sauce, and then feeding the rings to him while he was driving. I must say I did a fine job. |
| We got to Milwaukee. We were so excited. We didn�t know what we were going to do. I was sure we would get lost in Milwaukee and die (in that order), and I announced this thought to everyone present. As we drove into downtown Milwaukee, there was a man driving behind us and to the left of us. I never saw the man, but Megan and Alex say that he was very old. Ryan and Alex say that they can remember exactly what his car looked like. Why am I going on and on about this old man? Why do we remember so much about this random person driving near to us. It was what happened next that made us remember this poor old man. He drove his car strait into the concrete blocks that are between the roads when major highways split in two different directions. We don�t know why. Shortly after this is when I became aware of this man. I heard a crashing noise; I turned around and saw a big cloud of debris, next to those large concrete blocks. I never saw the man, never even saw his car. He probably isn�t alive now. That road was probably 55 mph. We had Ryan call 911 on his cell phone. It didn�t work. I don�t really know why. Does 911 work differently on cell phones? What the fuck? You can�t change the number for 911 for cell phones. Everyone knows it�s 911. Anyway, that man really made me appreciate my life. He made all of my �we�re gonna die� dialogue seem so rude. So pointless. I mean, we didn�t die. Isn�t that wonderful? This man did. |
| There are so many questions. Who was this man? Did he have family? Why did he run into the concrete blocks? Did he want to die? Did he fall asleep? Was he drunk? Was he senile? We will probably never know. We�ll probably never hear of him again. Poor old man. |
| After that episode, we decided that we didn�t want to do anything in Milwaukee. Ryan still wanted to shake it off and find some fun, but the rest of us were too shaken. We went home. |
| The way that we found the way home so quickly really made me love Alex. I mean, if I was driving, I would have gone crazy. A man died next to me. I�m driving in Milwaukee. And I don�t know where the fuck I actually am. But he kept a cool head. He just turned around, found a West 94 sign, and followed that. We stopped a few places on the way home to fill Ryan�s water bottle (not the Brownsville bottle, another normal bottle). We stopped to eat at a truck stop. We had a really nice waitress. I didn�t catch her name. If I did, I would mention it here now. I feel like I should have asked her for her name. We were felling pretty creeped out at the tuck stop. It felt a bit like a high school slasher movie. Like all that needed to happen next was that this man�s dead body would come after us and try to kill us. Luckily, that never happened. Alex got French silk pie, a cup of coffee, and corn beef hash with eggs and toast. Ryan got a muffin and a grapefruit. Megan and I got nothing. After a while, Alex decided that he didn�t want his corn beef and hash with eggs. He ate the toast. He didn�t even finish his pie. Ryan didn�t want his muffin. No one did. It was a pretty bad muffin. He asked the waitress to fill his water bottle, and she did. I ate some of Alex�s eggs and corn beef hash. |
| We all got home safe and sound. We really felt like we bonded a lot on the trip. We didn�t even really go anywhere. But it was fun. It was freedom. Nothing makes you feel more alive, or more creeped out, than seeing a car accident. Poor old man. |
| Brownsville and Milwaukee |