Once again, I fell for the director trick, a la "The Village" with M. NIGHT SHYAMALAN, the director with the badass name. This time it was under the guise of Quentin Tarantino. Now, I was under the impression that he directed the movie. In actuality, he simply "presented" Hero, whatever the fuck that means. I can present my balls, but it doesn't mean I had anything to do with their creation. I missed this (not the part about the balls, but about the movie, you assholes).

So, I walk into the theatre expecting some Uma Thurman about to kick some ass as in Kill Bill, and I'm instead presented with Chinese people flying around. Not exactly what I was expecting. I was upset because this dispelled my theory that Rick Blood was the only flying human. Then again, you can never count out those crazy Chinese.

The movie takes you through several different scenarios. Each scenario presents part of the true plot, and you learn everything about the characters and the land of China through these stories. The true story can be pieced together through the mini-stories presented. An interesting concept, but one that just didn't stick with me. Constant subtitles were perhaps part of this nag.

The movie is a bunch of symbolism, mainly relating to art. The underlying concept is that the finest warrior realizes the value of peace as an art over the value of swordplay as an art. This might say something nice to the Chinese, who are obsessed with Kung Fu and shit, but it won't mean much to the average McDonald's eating American. It might make some point to the Wapanese (white people that think they are Japanese) but most of those people are far too stupid to understand the themes and symbols in the movie anyway.