TOP TEN REASONS WHY MARRYING LANCE IS A BAD IDEA

10. You would never be able to have children.

9. Let's say you adopt. You won't only have to explain about the birds and the bees to them, but to Lance too.

8. That Adam's apple might cause physical harm to the kids (he might knock them over with it).

7. What will you answer when your kids asks if daddy really is a girl?

6. What if the kid goes on the net and finds out that people are calling their dad a transvestite? You'll have to explain to them what a transvestite is and that they are right.

5. Do you really want to hear about Toby every day? I mean, you have to show you're sad over it too and for how long can you put up with comforting him about the same thing every day?

4. How fun do you think it would be to hear "I'm from Mississippi" as an excuse in the household? You know the kids are going to start to use that one too.

3. Won't it be embarrassing to admit that he's your husband?

2. You won't have a sex life... at least not with Lance.

1. Your kid will be named Toby, and you know it will...