The Little Gingerbread Koorime

Folk Tales -- The Little Gingerbread Koorime

by Cresent Star

Disclaimer: All the characters used are the property of Yoshihiro Togashi. I'm just 'playing' with them, that's all.....

Once upon a time, in the Makai, far, far away, a little cheery girl by the name of Botan decided it was high time she baked something. She had flunked Home Ec in junior high, but that was alright.

So with that bright idea in her mind, she happily set off to collect the ingredients needed. These ingredients included some totally weird Makai herbs (magic herbs, for the sake of the story), flour, confectioner's sugar, lemon peel, etc.

Now Botan, being the complete ditz she was, had gotten the recipe for ginger bread men and nasty, red eyed fire youkai mixed up. She didn't discover this mistake until much later.

"Ooh look! The ginger bread man is coming out just fine!" she grinned. The gingerbread man had been in the oven for the past twenty minutes and she had been watching the whole time because she had nothing better to do.

The 'gingerbread man' was soon ready to be taken out of the oven. Botan had the shock of her life when she removed the cookie tin as a small, bad tempered fire youkai jumped out and tried to kill her.

"What the hell did you think you were doing?" he snarled.

"Umm... baking gingerbread men?" she replied meekly.

"Why did you have to create me??"

"I ... created... you?"

"Yes!"

"Oh." the idea obviously had a hard time trying to tunnel itself through her skull.

"What do you have to say?"

"Er, sorry?"

The fire demon didn't reply. Instead, he left the cottage in which Botan lived in rage. Okay, he trashed the little country cottage, *then* left.

The fire youkai made his way aimlessly through the Makai forest, muttering curses about why he was being dragged into a totally lousy world and insulting all the forest animals he met. Along the way, he met a skunk with a really weird hairdo.

"Hi! My name is Kuwabara! So nice to meet you!"

"Go to hell."

The skunk paused in consternation at the unfriendly remark. He hit upon a brilliant idea on how to make peace with the unpleasant fire youkai.

"Please little fire youkai, sing a song for me!"

"Why the hell should I? Get lost!

"Please?"

"No!"

The skunk continued to plead with him, so in order to get rid of the little pest, the fire youkai took off his head with the Jaou Ensatsu Ken. The last thing the skunk saw was probably Hiei unsheathing his sword.

The fire youkai continued on his *un-merry* way beacuse he knew as sure as hell he didn't have anywhere else to go. Hiei (by the way, that's the fire youkai's name) encountered another forest creature that had a song request.

"Hi! I'm Yuusuke! Please sing for me!"

"Get outta my way, worm."

"Please, just a few bars!"

"Fine."

The worm brightened.

"Jaou Ensatsu Ken!"

So much for the little worm.

Unbeknownst to Hiei (but beknownst to us), he was being watched and stalked even as he fried the little worm extra crispy. He was nearing a marshy part of the forest when he bumped, quite literally, into his stalker. The golden eyed youko stared at him.

"I'm not going to sing for you, " he stated resolutely.

"You're not?" the youko pouted.

"No!"

"Pretty please?" the youko attempted a Big Cute Eyes Look (tm) on him.

"NO!"

"Pretty, pretty, please, with pink bows and cherries on top?" he wheedled, while he used his youki to make the vines behind Hiei wave about menacingly. Okay! Okay! They tried to eat him... no biggie!

Hiei took one look at the demon plants and changed his mind. "Oh *fine*..."

Quite surprisingly, the bad tempered youkai had a rather nice voice. It was a beautiful bass with sensual under currents and-- oh, who the hell am I trying to kid?!

"Little fire youkai, I can tell you have a sweet voice, but I can't hear you clearly! Please come closer!"

Grumbling, uttering some unprintable things under his breath, Hiei went closer to the Big Bad Youko.

"I *still* can't hear you properly! Please come closer!"

The demon plants threatening to eat him told him that it would be a really good idea.

"Please youkai, come closer so I can really hear you!"

Hiei was just one foot away from the Big Bad Youko now. His singing had gotten some what nervous. But before he could react, the Big Bad Youko pounced on him and ate him *all* up. (heh, heh, heh...)

(Twenty minutes later...)

"By the way," said the youko, draping a possessive arm over the spent Hiei. "The name's Kurama."

"Ku..ra...ma..?" he squeaked.

"Good, " replied the youko. "Now you know what name to scream."

With that, the youko jumped and screwed him again.

The End!

The moral of the story: Do not trust Golden Eyed Youkos that have the ability to control plants and go by the name of "Kurama".

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