storytheclown

With a long black beard and dark sunglasses Robert points accusatorily at the Japanese man. Just from this description of Robert you might think he is some mysterious man living behind facial hair and glasses, but in fact in the picture Robert is a seventeen year-old clown wearing a fake beard and jokingly pointing at the our guide who was standing next to him. Robert was the veteran of the mission trip to Japan that year, he had lived there for a month the summer before. The trip that year seemed very short to him given we were there for only ten days and had to go back. Robert is the pastor's son at my church and with the position of pastor's kid comes the requirement that you must be eccentric and a troublemaker. Robert was both of these. In addition to his fake beard he bought at the Japanese novelty shop he bought a fake tongue. Yes I know very strange. And somehow he convinced me to take pictures of him "licking" things. I have pictures of him licking a telephone pole as a Japanese lady walks by, and even one of him licking the middle of a busy downtown street.
I doubt his eccentricities will ever go away. As a teenager every month he had a new hobby that he spent a load of money on until the month changed he had to come up with a new one. From skater to rollerblader from prep to gangsta, Robert was them all. It really was amusing to see Robert ollying and doing kick flips. You see he wasn't the skinniest guy around; he was a bit overweight, to his credit in the past year he has slimmed down quite a bit.
For a while he was a surfer. This hobby manifested itself because he spent last summer straightening out at a disciple ship house in Los Angeles. Although I never saw him surf because of the lack of the proximity of the beach to the Central Valley, he was quite good. That of course are words from his mouth, though I don't see how after two months he could be a great surfer, when it many times takes years for professional surfers to get to where they are. After moving back home he did seem to abandon that hobby pretty quick. I guess it's too hard to get to the beach when all you have is your mom's car to drive.
There's nothing stranger than seeing a white guy wearing Sean John and lot of bling bling. He recently went through a period where the only music he listened to was rap and the large diamonds on his ears were "real." It always made me think twice when I heard a guy dressed like that suddenly talking about how talented and awesome U2 is. U2 is his favorite band, and even though he was a gangsta and was supposed to listen to rap he couldn't let his homey Bono down by not listening to him. Now after his period of blingin' second only to U2 is Justin Timberlake. At least it makes more sense than Ludacris or 50 cent, because of Robert's too white skin.
Now Robert is a 100% American Eagle guy and a 100% Express man. Well I guess that doesn't add up. Just like Robert. Every other day he seems to switch between the two. I do have to admit though these styles both fit him. They fit him a lot better than Sean John did, P-Diddy must be home right now sighing in relief. The other day he told me he was trying to get a job at American Eagle, for the interview he told me he planned to have every piece of his clothing be American Eagle, and wear a name tag saying "I love American Eagle." He was serious too, that's the sad thing.
I mentioned earlier he went to LA to "straighten up." This is where we get more serious. Robert as a pastor's kid ended up with the stereotypical bad streak that pastor's kids are known to have. He became a party guy. He was always at parties getting drunk or recuperating from a hangover, that's secondhand information from the post-straightening Robert. His parents made him go to a place called the "D-house," the "D" is for discipleship. The point was for him to be living with these other Christian guys and really try to help him and influence him to get back on the right track. It worked wonders, Robert came back a changed man. Today he works hard at the church as a maintenance man, and is going to college to find out what it is his future holds for him. Today he turns 21 and he is just going to hang out with his friends and drink a six-pack of Pepsi. Robert is finished with his old way of life, and looks forward to the future.