Now, at 37 years old and somehow making it through 2006 alive, Griffey is WAY OVERDUE to fall completely apart this year.  So pick your dates, and pick them well!

RULES:

Pick a date between April and September of 2006 in which you think Ken Griffey, Jr. will sustain a massive, season-ending injury.  To avoid confusion, here are a number of ruling guidelines:

• The winning person will be the person who picks the date on or closest to the actual date that Griffey sustains his season-ending injury.  NOT the date that he is placed on the injured list, and not a date in which he receives just any major injury – it has to be season ending.
• If KGJ sustains a massive injury but he is not officially declared to be out for the rest of the season, then no ruling of a winner will be made at that time.  If he later returns to play games after sustaining the injury, it will not be considered a season-ending injury.  If he is injured and does not play another game for the rest of the season, despite no official announcement of deactivation, then at the end of the season the person who picked the date closest to that injury will be declared the winner.
• If KGJ finishes the season without enduring a season-ending injury, Genocide is the de-facto winner.
• You may pick any date between April 1 and September 30, including off-days and the Allstar Game.  He could always find a way to injure himself washing his car.  Or carrying meat up stairs.  Or panicking like a girl when dreaming about spiders.  Or overdosing on tonic, resulting in gigantism.
• His season must begin before it can end. Spring training will not count, and March is unavailable to pick dates from.
• Only one person may select any particular day.  If someone has already picked the day you chose, you will be asked to select a new day.
• In the event of a tie (e.g. two people are off by the same number of days), both will be declared co-winners.
• The winner of the Injury Pool will be allowed a Board of Doom Theme of their choice for 1 Week, subject to veto by Aujam.
• If a BoD moderator wins (Aujam, Holy, Naked), they have the authority to select an awardee of their choice to pick a board theme, or can simply award no one.
• The "Los Angeles Angels of Anaheim" is the gayest name in the history of rainbows and buttsex. In direct conflict with MLB’s homo abbreviations, the Dodgers have properly been named LA and the Angels have been named ANA.
• Injuring Ken Griffey Jr. yourself is a criminal offense and the KGJSEIP does not endorse such action.  Although if you do, you will not be disqualified.  However, you may feel free to kill Barry Bonds.  Such action will award you the honorary title of “God of All That is Good and Just in Life.”

Home games are highlighted in red, away in white, and off days in light gray.  Days already selected by other people are furthermore highlighted in blue, with the name of the person already calling it in yellow, as can be seen in this example:

SMARCH

For your convenience, you have been provided with information on the calendar to help you make your decision, such as team opponents and game times.  This will allow you to strategically pick your date, such as choosing a date where the Reds have played a several day stretch without an off-day, have just traveled across the country and may be jetlagged, or have a day game following a night game, which could cause players to be more tired.  Or, alternatively you can choose the strategy that most people have in the past – randomly picking a day without even looking at the calendar, you lazy cunt.

So, without further adieu, here is the calendar!

Submit your date pick before April 1, or it will be too late!

APRIL

MAY

JUNE

JULY

AUGUST

SEPTEMBER

HALL OF FAME:

Past Winners

• 2004: Madmax/Trixy.  KGJ SEASON ENDS AUGUST 11.  Rules were not clarified this year, leading to a dual-winner.
• 2005: Nakedman.  KGJ SEASON ENDS SEPTEMBER 14.  Nakedman defers BoD theme reward to Whitelight, who came the next closest.
• 2006: Genocide by default. NO KGJ SEASON-ENDING INJURY

Past Prizes

• In 2004, I had no admin control over the BoD, and so the only reward was the pride and honor of being right.
• In 2005, Whitelight chose a Washington Redskins board theme.
• In 2006, a classic Ken Griffey Jr. Seattle Mariners poster was offered to the winner of the pool in addition to the BoD theme.  Since Geno technically won by default instead of by picking a date, it was not awarded.  I have absolutely no clue where that poster ended up, and honestly may have already thrown it away or something.  I dunno.  For his BoD theme, he selected the weightlifter whose insides fell out of his ass.  But as he was unable to supply a link to the picture, a highly-advanced digital graphics software (MS Paint) representation of the picture was put up.

Honorable Mentions

• 2006: Grimmy guessed 1-day off from Griffey’s major Sept 4 toe-injury.  However, as he would play another 2 games and not be deactivated, the rules do not qualify event as a season-ending injury.

Hilarious Injury Hall of Fame

Pre Sucking (Mariners):

• May 26, 1995: Breaks two bones in left wrist making a catch against RF wall at Kingdome. Misses 73 games but returns to play with 4-inch metal plate attached to wrist.
• June 19, 1996: Breaks bone in right hand when he fouls a pitch off it. Misses 20 games.

Sucking Hard (Reds):

• July 1, 2000: Twists knee and is removed from game.  Never put on injured list, but sits out July 11 Allstar game, citing tendonitis.
• Sept 11, 2000: Partially tears hamstring in home plate collision.  Only makes 3 pinch hit appearances for rest of season.
• March 26, 2001: Re-aggravates torn hamstring in spring training.
• April 29, 2001: Continued aggravation of hamstring puts KGJ on injured list until mid-June.
• April 7, 2002: Dislocates knee cap and tears patellar tendon in right knee in rundown play.  Home fans boo injured Griffey.  Out until late April. 
• June 25, 2002: Torn right hamstring (again).  Out for another month. 
• April 5, 2003: Dislocates right shoulder while diving to make a catch.  Remains out until mid-May.
• July 17, 2003: Completely tears tendon from right ankle after first game back from Allstar break.  Season Ending Injury.
• July 10, 2004:  Partially tears hamstring right before All-star break, out for 3 weeks.
• August 11, 2004: Two days after returning from earlier injury, completely tears same hamstring when attempting to make a sliding catch.  Season Ending Injury.
• September 4, 2005: Strains tendon in right foot. Does not play again and de-activation announced Sept 22.  Season Ending Injury.
• April 12, 2006:  Strains biceps tendon of right knee catching a fly ball in batting practice.  Out for a month.
• September 4, 2006:  Dislocates right toe after jamming cleats into RF wall chasing home run. Misses 22 of last 24 games of season.  Second straight year achieving major injury on September 4.  Nearly Season Ending Injury.

© 2007 Nakedman Sports

Vote on the Board of Doom, or wherever else I whore this.