Chapter 22: *Mailbox*
(c) 2000-01
The N.C. Daily Dreamer
* Nick*
"Who were talking to, B?" I asked. I knew it was Shelby. No one would tell me why she left tour. Not even Mark. I felt so alone. So incomplete. Some nights I cried myself to sleep and some I'd lie awak wondering what I did wrong to make her leave. "No one, Kaos. You ready to go? I told Shel tomorrow is our last concert, so she doesn't know we'll actually be home tomorrow morning," he told me. "How is she?" I questioned instantly. "Good." "And Sean?" "Getting bigger." I was suprised Brian never yelled at me for asking about Shelby and Sean everyday. He always answered with no hint of impatience or annoyance. It's like he understood what I was going through. Either that or he just felt sorry for me. "Can you please tell me why she left?" "Nick, we've been over this millions of times. I can't. I'm sorry." Brian grabbed his hat and walked out of the veneu. I sighed heavily and tossed my backpack over my shoulder as I made my way to the bus. One or another I WAS going to find out why Shelby left. Once I reached the bus, I pullout of a pen and notebook and started to write Shelby a letter. A letter confessing my true feelings for her.
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"Nick, wake up!" Brian nudged me and I rolled over in my bunk. "What?" I moaned rubbing my eyes. "We're back!" "Uh..." I sat up and stumbled off the bus carrying my backpack. "Your suitcases are in your car," AJ told me as I slowly made my way to it. I hopped in y Durango and drove off. The clock read 7:16 a.m. and I groaned. As I waited at a stop light I tore the letter from my notebook and folded it. I scribbled "Shelby" on the paper folded into fourths and grabbed the address, I begged Brian to give me, to her new house from my wallet. Five minutes later I stopped infront of a three story white house with a two car garage. There were huge bay windows and I could tell there was a pool in the back. I jumped out the car and placed the letter in the mailbox at the end of the driveway. Why couldn't I be in that house with her? She was pushing me away and I didn't even know what I did!
*Shelby*
I stood looking out my bedroom window holdng Sean while feeding him a bottle. I saw a faimlier green Durango stop by the mailbox and a tall blond hop with something in his hand. It was Nick. I knew it, but what was he doing? He put a white paper in the mailbox and closed it before pulling away. I thought they weren't supposed to come back until tomorrow! I watched him drive out of site and then scurried outside to the mailbox with Sean in my arms. I grabbed the paper from it and opened it up as I slowly walked back tot he front door. It read:
Shelby,
Hey. I feel akward writing this. You know what I mean? I know you talk to Brian everyday. I hear your name. When you left tour, I was totally lost-incomplete. I begged the guys to tell me, but they wouldn't. Mark just said you needed time to be a good mother to Sean, but I have a feeling it's more then that. Why can't you tell me why you left? Please, Shelby, I need to know. Is it something I did? If so, I'm so sorry. Just tell me, and I swear I'll make it up to you. We don't even talk anymore! I ache to see your face again and see your smile. I miss those piercing blue eyes of yours. They're the window to your heart-your soul. If only I could open it. You see Shelby Mariah Cholson, I'm trying to tell you that I love you. No, it's not puppy love. I love you with everything in me. I love you more then all the words I could say. I never thought I could find a love like this. I understand if the feelings aren't mutual. We're best friends for God's sake! We're not supposed to fall in love, but I can't help it-I did. I've always felt this something for you. I didn't know what it was,so I forgot-dismissed the feeling. I know what it is now. It's TRUE love. It's you. I keep asking myself why I feel this way. The only answer I come up with is it's meant to be. I've loved you ever since the day I met you when my basketball rolled across the street. I didn't know it then, but I do now. We were young and didn't care about love-just living every moment like it was our last. The kiss we shared wasn't just A kiss. It was a moment. A moment I never want to forget. I love you. Please say you love me, too. I don't know what I'd do without you. You're my world, my love, my life, my everything.
Love,
Nick
The paper floated to the ground as I collasped on the couch after putting Sean in his bassinet. Salty tears trickled down my pale cheeks continuously. "Why?" I mumbled. "Why, why, why?" I threw a small lanedar pillow across the room. It hit a picture of Nick and me and it fell to the floor. The next sound I heard was the shattering of glass.
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