Blood of My Heart, Beloved of My Soul

 

Chapter 13

 

Not a Fairy Tale (Daniel’s Awakening)

 

As Daniel and Kataya entered her chamber, he closed the door and took her in his arms.  “Kataya, if you are going to tell me that you had lovers, it isn’t necessary.  You have not hidden the fact that you have children, or that you have had lovers.  What happened while we were apart isn’t important.”

 

“I am afraid that it is, Daniel.  I think you have the right to know why I am so determined to kill this particular System Lord.  I think that perhaps the others should know as well.  It will be affecting everyone and everything, involved in this, and I feel that it is right that they should know more about my personal involvement.  They should know what she is capable of and why she must die.  I would tell you privately and there are no doubt things you will wish to know later, that we can discuss when we are alone, but I do not wish to have to repeat the story twice.”

 

Daniel looked into her eyes and saw the turmoil of emotions there.  He nodded his agreement.

 

Kataya opened the link to all involved and soon had agreement to meet in her quarters in half an hour from her other three teammates.

 

She walked over to the bed and took off her boots; then she sat down with her back against the headboard and motioned Daniel to join her.  Once they were settled comfortably, Daniel took her hand and stroked it gently.  “They will not be here for a while, Daniel,” Kataya said softly. 

 

Daniel smiled and pulled her into his arms.  The kiss was soft and gentle with none of the aggressive sexual overtones they had known before.  This was a kiss that said, ‘I love you and I accept you as you are’.  It was exactly what she needed.

 

When the kiss ended, Kataya sighed and rested her head on his shoulder.  “Is there anything in particular that you wish to know, Daniel?”

 

He shook his head.  “No.  I’ll wait, and if I have questions still unanswered when you are finished, I’ll ask you then.”  He noticed that some of the gems in her circlet were glowing.  “I guess I do have a question.  I’m assuming that what you want to talk about probably won’t cover this, but if it will just tell me and I’ll drop it.”

 

“All right.  What do you wish to know?”

 

He reached up and touched the amethyst that was beginning to grow brighter.  “Why do some of the stones glow sometimes, while at other times they don't?”

 

“Ah.  You are correct.  That is not something I was going to cover tonight.  The stones represent different energy pulses, or waves.  Over the millennia, we have learned to harness the power of the energy around us.  It has become second nature to us to absorb energy.”  She smiled at him.  “When the stone glows for a short period and then goes out it simply means that I am unintentionally absorbing energy into an area that is not at full strength.  When it is glowing as it is now, it is a deliberate accessing of the power or energy of that stone.  In the case of the Amethyst stone, it is the power and energy of the Universe.  Would you like to feel it Daniel?”

 

He looked taken aback for a moment and then he said, “Can you do that?  Transfer it to me, that is?” 

 

“Yes.  It is how we sustain someone with our life force.  Since you are not ill or injured, you will feel the power of the universe flow through you.”

 

“All right.  What do I do?”

 

She placed her hands on either side of his head, and then she brought their foreheads together.  As she chanted in the beautiful tones so reminiscent of Gregorian chant, Daniel suddenly felt the power and wonder that Sam had felt, just a few days before.  He realized that he felt energized, as if he could go out and take on the world.  He felt great.

 

As it became almost overwhelming, she broke the contact and settled back against the headboard.  The stone still glowed.  “How do you stand that much energy flowing into you?  I thought I would explode toward the end, but it was…I don’t know how to describe it.  Wonderful, even fantastic seems too dull a word to use.” 

 

Kataya smiled at him.  “How about glorious, awesome, and enchanted?  Would they do?  As for the other, I was channeling into you, Daniel, so I was not amassing it as you were.  Now I am, but it will stop soon.”

 

“I see.  That makes sense, I guess.  Your choice of words were a good description of the feelings, too.”

 

“I just feel the need of some extra strength.  It takes quite a bit of energy to talk to my father, and my emotional outburst later did not help.  I replenished the others earlier though, as they are much easier to do, since they come from nature.  Tapping into the universe is much more difficult.” 

 

She stopped speaking, but remained searching his eyes.  Very slowly, he leaned towards her and captured her lips with his.  He pulled her into his lap and continued to ravish her mouth.  His hands went to her breasts and he moaned deep in his throat.  She offered no protest.  Why should she?  This was what she hungered for, needed, wanted.  She returned his kiss, moved her hand down his hard flat stomach, and slid it downward.  He caught her hand in his and moaned, “Oh, God, not now.  We don’t have time.  Later, though, my love, promise me later.”

 

“I promise, Daniel,” she said, as she took his mouth with hers again. 

 

Daniel pulled his lips from hers, moved her body around, and settled her between his legs.  Now she was held closely in his arms with her back pressed against his chest and, he realized, the hardness of his erection.  He ached for her. 

 

However, those thoughts aside, in this position, he would easily be able to give her encouragement and support as she talked to their teammates and told them what she felt needed to be said.  He knew that doing this was going to cause her great distress. 

 

On the other hand, this position also gave him access to her breasts and the tempting curve of her neck and shoulder.  Not to mention the apex of her thighs.  He had to stop thinking about that for now.  He determinedly pulled his mind away from there.  Later he would explore this woman.  For now, he tried to calm both of them.  His hands gently caressed her arms as he held her.  They sat quietly, comfortable in the silence, drawing and giving acceptance to one another.

 

By the time the others arrived, they were both calm and comfortable.  Their three teammates came into the room and helped themselves to coffee, port, or mead, as was their custom.

 

At the solemn look on Kataya’s face, not even Jack made a wisecrack.  As he sat down, he looked at her and said, “You have something to tell us that you feel we should know.”

 

Kataya seemed to be lost in the distant past.  She tilted her head back against Daniel and closed her eyes for a moment.  When she raised her head and opened her eyes, she began to speak. 

 

“Yes, I do,” She said.  With those words, she started to tell her story.  “Almost two hundred years ago, I met a Heartmate.  A Heartmate that I loved passionately and with who I chose to entwine.  We were together for eighty years.  For fifty of those years, I was blended with a Tok’Ra named Siesha.  I will not go into details, suffice it to say she chose to die that I might live.  I stayed with my Heartmate for another thirty years.  We had two kits together.  Taesha and Lanwin.” 

 

“Taesha is very much like me and someday she will become a truly great warrior.  She is also passionate about helping her father’s people.  It is her wish to blend and go to help the Tok’Ra when she is knighted.  Lanwin, too, will become an exceptional warrior and he feels much the same about the Tok’Ra.  It would not surprise me if he also chose to blend someday soon. I will knight both of them before our mission against Bastet for they have both volunteered to go."

 

She smiled ruefully, “As I am sure you have guessed by now, all four of my kits have chosen to follow me on the path of the Katteri-enti.  My oldest son, who is much like Merdwin and will rival him in power in a few thousand years or so, is Katteri-enti, but he has chosen to cloister himself with the Ancients for now.” 

 

She shook her head, “I am sorry, I know I seem to be rambling, but I want you to know everything that might in some way affect our mission, and I feel that our ties to the Tok’Ra do affect it.  It makes this mission even more important to us.  If we cannot stop Bastet, before she launches her fleet against the Tok’Ra, we will again send them to Avilion.  Since we cannot do that with the population of Earth, we will stop her before she comes here,” She said in a grimly determined voice. 

 

Then, deliberately relaxing against Daniel and his comforting warmth, she continued, “You have met Gwennetha, my daughter with Merdwin, and you will meet the other two.  The offspring of my Tok’Ra lover and I.”  Kataya looked at Daniel’s hand holding hers.  He was listening intently, she knew. 

 

She continued, “Dominic was a wonderful person.  In many ways, Daniel reminds me of him, of what he was like while he was blended.  I loved him and his symbiote deeply and passionately.  They meant more to me than I can ever express with words.” 

 

Averting her eyes as tears welled, she swallowed and slowly began to speak again, “Dominic and I were both very involved in the war with the System Lords.  He was assigned to infiltrate Bastet’s stronghold.  He succeeded all too well and was soon a trusted member of her household.” 

 

“He was an extremely handsome man and his symbiote transformed him into a man who was not only handsome, but also virile and charismatic.  He could charm a rock into rolling up hill and you would swear you could hear laughter when he smiled.  Bastet became infatuated with him and took him as a lover.”  Again, Kataya swallowed painfully.  “Had he refused, she would have known he was not what he appeared to be.”

 

“Bastet had never made a secret of the fact that she planned to be the one who succeeded at eliminating the Tok’Ra.  She was making plans to attack one of the Tok’Ra bases.  Dominic was relaying important information to us.  We could not afford to pull him out.  It would have taken months for someone else to work into a position high enough to gather the intelligence we needed.  It was unlikely anyone could have gained more information than he could.  She loved to brag to him while they were in her bed.  It is where he got most of his information.  How can you replace that?  He despised her and wished to leave, but could not.  He was in an impossible situation.”

 

Kataya stared bleakly at the far wall.  Sam made an inarticulate sound, but didn’t interrupt.  “Bastet managed to infiltrate the Tok’Ra ranks with one of her own people, much as she has done now.  There was no chance for Dominic to escape.  He was caught.  Being a spy would have been bad enough.  She thought he loved her.  When she realized that he had been using her and felt nothing for her, but hatred and contempt, she was completely enraged.”

 

“The other infiltrator we had in her household was not in a position that involved being close to her, and she managed to escape before she was detected.  She told us what had happened.  She also told us that Bastet had decided to attack right away, instead of waiting until her entire fleet was available.  We had very little time before the attack.”  Kataya stopped speaking.  Daniel hugged her gently, letting her know he was there for her.  She regained control of her emotions and continued her story.

 

“The situation was very bad.  We knew Dominic would be tortured.  I contacted my father and we evacuated the Tok’Ra to Avilion, the Sanctuary, where they would be safe.  We also contacted Lord Yu, to tell him that Bastet planned to attack him next.  Although those had been her plans, we did not know if they still were.  We told him anyway.  He, of course, attacked her before she could do that.”

 

“I was sent to the Stronghold with a small hand picked group of Warriors.  Lord Yu was on his way.  Bastet had been alerted.  She was escaping even as we fought our way into her palace.  I neither know nor care how many Jaffa were killed.  We missed her by mere minutes.  We were too late to capture or kill her, and we were too late to save my love.” 

 

Kataya’s voice had become a cold flat monotone.  “Dominic had been tortured so badly that he could not survive.  It was a miracle he was still living when we got there.  Even with the two other Katteri, and the Wiccadian that were with us, we could not sustain both of them until we could get them to Avilion.  Perhaps if Merdwin had been there we might have been able to save them, but he was not.”

 

“I have seen much in my years as a Katteri-enti Warrior, but I have never before, or since, seen anyone so badly tortured and in such a way that their death would linger so long or so painfully.  Of course, she had used the sarcophagus on him numerous times so this was only the last time he had been tortured and left to die so painfully.  Bastet had taken it with her as she escaped, so we did not have that option either.”

 

“Dominic begged me to save his symbiote.  But, he was too weak to leave Dominic’s body, let alone blend with a new host.”  Kataya took a deep breath before continuing.  Her voice became soft and low.  “We had no other choice.  Dominic pleaded with me to do it, to save the <i>other half of me</i> as he always called him."  Her voice almost inaudible, as she relived the past, she murmured, "his words to me were, “We have lived as one and we have loved as one.  I do not wish to die as one and leave you forever.  You can save him, and I shall live on in him and love you always.  Kataya, adored of my heart please do this one last act for us with your own hands.”  He was whispering, as he had no strength left.  His voice was filled with agony.  He was in so much pain.” 

 

Silent tears streaked Kataya’s face.  “In the end, I did as he wished.  I slit my love’s throat, killing him by absorbing the last of his life force and taking his soul into myself.  And then, I removed his symbiote.”  Sam gasped and even Jack looked stunned.  Teal’c was apparently unmoved, but if one looked closely, they would discern the muscle jumping in his jaw.  “The symbiote was dying.  I held him in my arms and sustained him with my own life force until we could get to Avilion.  The two Katteri and the Wiccadian had to channel energy to me several times on the journey to the portal.  If they had not done so, I would have died with him.”

 

“Some of Bastet’s forces were still around.  We were involved in several firefights on our way back.  My grief was intense, and I have had over one hundred years to feed the fires of my hatred and need for vengeance.”

 

Sam asked in a strangled voice, “What happened to the symbiote?”

 

“For several days, we did not know if he would live or die. He survived, but it took many months at Avilion for him to recover enough to blend.  Justin, the young Wiccadian who had been in the rescue party, offered to become his host when he was well enough to blend.  We had thirteen more years together before I was recalled to the war in the Pegacian System, and it was time for the kits to start their formal training at Avilion.”

 

“I left, and I have not seen or heard from him since.  We both knew that I would probably not be able to return.  I was needed by my homeworld.  I would have to stay until I was no longer needed.  As you know, that circumstance has just recently happened.  However, time did not stand still for him, either.  His host was killed and he blended with a new host.  After that, he met his new mate.  I was told he loved her very much.  I am very thankful for that.  I—lost track of him, and I have not heard anything about him in almost ninety years.”

 

Kataya looked unbearably sad.  No one asked any questions, but they all knew that these facts of an event long passed were still coloring what would happen in the near future.  Daniel indicated to the group that they should leave, with a look and nod toward the door.  Only Sam stopped and turned around.  She came back to Kataya and held her for a long moment as their spirits spoke one to the other, giving assurance and acceptance without saying a word.  The tears in her eyes and on her cheeks and the quiver of her lips said all that needed to be said.

 

Daniel held her for several minutes after everyone had left without saying anything.  Then he turned her slightly towards him, and looking into her eyes that looked so desolate, he spoke to her.  “Kataya, you did what you had to do.  Why do you feel guilt over it?”

 

Kataya took a deep breath and faced Daniel squarely.  “Because I am guilty, Daniel.”  As he went to speak, she gently placed her fingers over his lips to stop him.  She closed her eyes for a moment and then opened them to gaze into his eyes.

 

“I loved Dominic, Daniel, but even if he had not asked me to kill him, I probably would have.  Although I loved Dominic very much, the love I had for his symbiote was even more powerful.  And, although circumstances were such that there was no choice, I know in my own heart that had it been different and either one could have survived, but not both, I would not have chosen Dominic.  I believe that Dominic knew this, and he asked that I kill him thinking it would keep me from being and feeling guilty.”  She pulled out of his arms, got up and walked to the mirror on the wall.  Daniel came up to stand behind her.  She nodded at the image of herself.  “There are days I have trouble looking in there.”  Her eyes met Daniel’s in the mirror.  “If I cannot forgive myself, how can I expect forgiveness from you?”

 

Daniel wrapped his arms around her from behind and held her closely in his arms.  He rested his chin on the top of her head and kept their eyes locked in the mirror.  “How can you not?  I have nothing to forgive you for, and you have nothing for which to forgive yourself.  You had no choice and even if, as you say, you’d had a choice, still there would be nothing to forgive.  You had to do something that no one should have to do, Kataya.  I can’t imagine anyone sitting in judgment of you and your actions.  What you did,” Daniel sighed, and held her closer, “I don’t know if I would have the fortitude and the courage to do what you did.  I can only hope I would, if the circumstances were reversed.  He obviously loved you very much, and you loved him in return.  A love like that is rare.”

 

“And yet, it is as a candle to the sun when compared to what I feel for you.”  She said slowly.

 

Daniel was aware of his heart stopping for a moment before it began to pound within him.  This lovely, complex woman was telling him how much she loved him.  Telling him that her love for him meant she would literally die for him, should the occasion arise.  He realized, that on some deeper inner level of consciousness, he had known all along who she was.  Sha’uri had told him, too.  She was the woman.  The other half.  The mate.  Hindsight was showing him what Sha’uri had tried to tell him in his dream.  Sha’uri had been a Heartmate, but this woman, this Woman, was a part of his soul and he was a part of hers.  His Soulmate.  Her Soulmate.  Why had it taken him so long to come to this realization, he wondered?  How could he have been so blind?  Kataya saw the realization come into his eyes. 

 

Slowly, Daniel turned Kataya to face him.  Equally slowly, he lowered his lips to hers.  One touch of her lips and he was on fire.  He couldn’t drink enough from her lips to quench his thirst for her.  He teased her lips until they opened for him and then plundered the sweetness within with his tongue, before stopping to suck on her lower lip, nibbling, tasting, and finally crushing them in his need.

 

He had to have her.  He had to join with her.  He wanted to be whole again, and only with her could that happen.  Once again, the feelings he’d known the day she arrived enveloped him.  This, she, was completion; it was inevitable and he wanted it.  He didn’t recognize the low, feral growl as coming from his throat; he didn’t even hear it, but she did, and she recognized it for what it was.  It was the sound of a Furling male calling to his mate, demanding surrender, offering the same in return.  It was a primeval, ancient, almost savage sound, and it called to her deeply. 

 

He wanted her.  He forced his lips to leave hers, so that they could explore the soft golden skin of her throat.  He found himself biting her neck, leaving marks that would not fade anytime soon, but he didn’t care.  He sucked on the side of her throat until she cried out, in pain.  Suddenly, he was an Alpha Male and she was the Alpha Female, he knew it, sensed it, and reveled in it.

 

He wanted her to feel him, to know that it was him, her mate, and that she belonged to him as no one else ever would.  The bruise he’d left on that soft throat was his brand, the outward sign of an insatiable, arcane desire to mark her as his.  The proof that she belonged to him; she was his.  Vaguely, he knew, somewhere in the back of his mind, that later he would be appalled by the fierce, barbaric possessiveness that overtook him, the archaic, pagan need that drove him, but for now, he could not and would not stop.  He leaned down, and lifting her high into his arms, he strode to the bed and laid her there.  Then he turned, locked the door and came back to her. 

 

She watched him in silence, knowing that when he had finally realized who and what they were to each other, it had released something wild within him.  He was driven by a need as old as the beginning of time.  He would not understand it, but he would follow it.  Need, desire and instinct drove him.  Rational thought was lost to him for now.  Perhaps she should stop this.  She knew there was a chance he would feel guilty later.  She decided it was a chance she was going to take.  She had waited centuries for this man and she wanted him as much as he wanted her.  She welcomed him and the ferocious wildness that burned within him. 

 

Feverishly he worked at the buttons on her shirt.  There were to many of the damn things and his hands were shaking so much he couldn’t get them undone.  Finally, in frustration, he simply ripped them off and threw the shirt to the floor.  The T-shirt was whipped over her head and onto what would soon be a pile of discarded clothing.  Her bra followed them both.

 

They had removed their boots earlier when they were sitting on the bed.  All that was left were socks, which were easy to dispose of.  His hands next went to the belt at her waist.  It was quickly undone and he stripped her BDU pants and her underwear off in one fluid movement.  She lay back onto the pillows as he gazed at her in wonder.  Her body was his to worship and to plunder; he planned to do both. 

 

He dragged a ragged breath into a body that seemed to have forgotten how to breathe, then proceeded to do to himself what he had just done to her. 

 

As she watched him rip his shirt and T-shirt off, followed by his pants and briefs, her own breathing became quick and shallow.  Hurry, she wanted to tell him, hurry.  As the last of his clothes hit the floor, she looked at him in awe.  His was a truly beautiful body, well proportioned, and while rippling with muscles, not overly developed. 

 

As he stood naked before her at the side of the bed he raised one knee and placed it on the bed in preparation to climbing onto the bed.  She halted him by reaching out and taking his shaft in one hand and gently cupping him with the other.  As she stroked him rhythmically, he drew in a breath and clenched his teeth.  “Kataya, I don’t think that’s a good…”  He got no farther as she leaned over and swiftly took him into her mouth one hand still holding him, and the other going around him to stroke and knead his buttocks.  His words were strangled in his throat, and he clasped the back of her head.  He was dying.  He was sure of it.  For some reason, she wanted him dead, and he was about to oblige her. 

 

She began a slow rhythm increasing it only to stop before he found the release he desired.  She changed her rhythm and started all over again.  When he could stand it no more, he pulled her mouth away from him and pressing her back onto the bed, he followed her down.  As he lay next to her, his hands began to caress her, and his lips followed where they led.  His fingers quickly found her nipples and his lips and tongue followed their lead. 

 

With trembling hands, he gently caressed her silky skin.  It felt exactly as he’d known it would.  She smelled of roses and musk.  His fingers found the pot of honey they had been searching for, and he dipped first one and then another in to test the richness that was there.  His thumb found the nub that was the center of her pleasure, and he heard her gasp and then groan as he found a rhythm that pleasured her.  He brought her close to the edge, only to back away and start over.  Finally, he heard what he needed to hear. 

 

“Daniel.  I need you.  Come to me.”  He left her breasts and brought his mouth to hers in a hard passionate kiss.  When at long last he broke it, she was whimpering her distress.  She was wild in his arms, raking his back with her nails.  He captured her wrists and held her as he kissed her deeply once again.  Moaning his name repeatedly, she heaved against him.  Still holding her captive, he said to her in a voice that was hoarse with longing and denied desire, “You are mine Kataya, now and for always.  Forever.” 

 

Still holding her wrists, he used his knees to part her legs, so he could slip between them.  He pressed his shaft against her opening, but didn’t enter her, teasing them both by staying just outside of where they wanted him to be.  She looked at him with eyes blazing with love and passion and need.  Finally, she gave him what he wanted, needed to hear from her, “And you are mine, Daniel, now and for always.  Forever.” 

 

She saw the same wild yearning, the love and desire flame and burn in his eyes.  Poised tensely above her, he whispered his vow to her, “Blood of My Heart, Beloved of My Soul, I come to thee.  You are my heart and my soul, for now and through all eternity.”  Still he waited, but not for long.  With joy and love in her face and eyes, she repeated her vow to him, “Beloved of my Soul, Blood of My Heart, I come to thee.  You are my soul and my heart, for now and through all eternity.” 

 

As she whispered the last word of their vows, Daniel released her arms, entered her, and with one sharp, frantic thrust, he was buried deep inside her.  Kataya gasped, and then sobbed, when he began to move in her.  Her hips lifted to meet his over and over as their bodies fell into that ancient dance of love and passion.  She was hot, wet, and wild in his arms.  The marks on his back would not fade in a day or two.  The bites he left on her shoulders, her neck and her breasts would stay awhile. 

 

Daniel was no longer in control of his actions as Kataya tossed in his arms and cried his name.  With one final thrust, Daniel hoarsely cried her name and felt the spasms of his climax start, only to be followed by the deep rhythmic clenching of Kataya’s own.  She cried his name repeatedly, as she lay in his arms, sobbing from the intensity of the release and the emotions caused by their joining. 

 

Daniel struggled to find and draw in the breath he needed to continue to live.  Never in this lifetime, had he felt anything so intense.  Slowly, they both quieted.  Daniel reached down and pulled the comforter over them both.  Later, there would be things to be said.  For now, just being together, was enough. 

 

They lost count of the times they awoke to take each other and to make love.  It was as if, now that they had finally come together, they could not get enough of each other.  Come morning, they overslept.  Daniel was the first to awaken and realize the time.  “Kataya, love, wake up.”

 

“I am too tired, Daniel, not again,” she murmured sleepily.

 

“Are you, love?”  Daniel asked teasingly as he trailed his hand up her leg toward her center again.  She muttered a negative, but her legs opened of their own accord, and her lips found their way to one of his nipples, which she had been delighted to find, were as sensitive as hers.  At his quickly indrawn breath, she laughed seductively.  “Two can play at this game, Daniel, and one should never underestimate the opposition.”

 

With a ragged gasp, he agreed.  Then his lips found hers and they were lost in one another.  They missed breakfast, but neither cared. 

             TBC

 

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