A Song and a Moment
Part 1
by Karen Wood
Disclaimer: The usual. I don't own them. Others do. I'm just writing my
thoughts about the characters down and sharing. Without profiting of
course.
Summary: Michael thinks back on what he was feeling while he and Isabel
sat at the diner counter in The End of the World.
Category: Unconventional Couples
Rating: PG
Sure I remember that day, I remember every part of it in fact. Why
shouldn't I? In fact, I make a point to hold that moment with me. Locked
away deep inside. Far enough inside that nothing can touch it. Nothing can
hurt it. And only I can feel it. But I don't let myself do that very
often. Feel it. I have no clue why....okay I do. Sure I do. If I feel it
too often or let someone know I'm feeling it it could be ruined. Or worse
yet be gone forever. And then what would I have? How would I feel? How
COULD I feel? I'm so damn afraid of that place being empty. I have enough
wounds and spaces and voids inside of me. I don't need to have that ripped
away as well. I can't have that taken away. That's why I keep it where I
do. I don't think even Max and his mind-reading-warping crap could reach
it. Not if I didn't want him to. Which I don't.
What was that song that was playing? God, I can't remember the name of it!
Why can't I remember? At that time, at that moment I thought I'd never
forget it. It was playing on the jukebox and I was tapping my hand on my
knee to the rhythm while bouncing my leg on the rung of the stool.
Something she normally hated but didn't say anything about that day. Lucky
me. Actually, I think I started doing that just because it irritated her.
Now it was a habit I didn't even control. But not one word or one
disapproving look at that moment. Because she was feeling it too. And was
as lost in the feeling as I was.
I think it was a favorite song of hers. Or the singer was her favorite
singer or something like that. I'm not quite sure. I just have this vague
memory of her saying something about it and something about favorite.
Maybe I'm wrong, maybe she was talking about a movie or a tv show or
something. But to me it's all linked somehow. That song and that moment.
She seemed to be enjoying it...the music...or maybe it was just me she was
enjoying. Me and my company. I'd like to think that. God, what am I
talking about? I know it. There I said it are you happy? For that moment
in time she was enjoying me. Enjoying being with me. Just sitting and
talking. God that's so simple isn't it? It was just like we'd done a
million and one times before and yet it was like the first time. Know what
I mean?
You know that saying? *There's a first time for everything?* With Isabel
it's like that...even if it's not the first time. I know, I know. I can't
explain it without sounding like a total dumbass. Some big goofy sappy
dumbass. But it's true. Sometimes, when it's just the two of us...which
doesn't happen too often, especially now...there's this moment. The air
between us gets real clear. And colors and sounds around us do this muted
thing, while the sound of our voices gets real pure. And I feel totally
alive. And I know she feels the same. I can tell by the way she laughs and
says my name. *Michael* No one says it quite like Iz. It's sorta breathy
and calm and you know, strong. *Michael* She has no clue what that does to
me when she says my name like that. Or maybe she does. She is Isabel
after all.
That song! I can almost hear it now. It's like I can hear the tune but not
the words. The words are just out of reach...kinda lurking where I can't
get a hold of them. It was that one singer. The one who Alex said was
selling out. Whatever. Who the hell cares? If it's a good song it's a good
song. It's like Iz and I. And that moment. It was good. So good. We were
sitting at the diner counter laughing. And people were staring since it's
not every day you see Queen Isabel and that Guerin kid laughing. And alone
together. But who cares? Who the hell cares? We sure didn't. We had that
moment and that song and we were together. And we were happy. And time
stood still for us. And for our love...whether or not we were ready or
able to admit it to each other or to ourselves.
God what was that song?
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