X-Files


by KatiKat




"Duo, can you please explain to me why you dragged me through the whole country only to show me what? Some sleepy backwater town somewhere in Kansas?"

"Wait, you'll like it."

<groan>

"Really. There's something weird going on here and I have a perfect explanation for it."

<glare> "You and your explanations. May I remind you that it was you and your perfect explanations that actually got us into this X-Files mess? Une will flip out if she finds where you dragged us this time."

"Well... but you have to admit that my theory that Relena was actually a pink alien had some logic in it."

<quiet>

"See? You can´t argue with that!" <beatific grin>

<sigh> "But you didn´t have to accuse her of that at a press conference in front of dozens of journalists from all over the world."

<hurt look> "But I had to warn the world of the danger she poses."

<another sigh>

<quiet>

"We're he~ere."

"Finally."

<pout> "You don´t have to be so grumpy."

"Duo, right now we could be in our office working on a REAL case and not trotting around the landscape to.... What the hell is that?"

<grin> "See? That´s I wanted to show you. I knew you would like it."

"Duo, the field is full of mud. Do we really... Okay, obviously we do."

"Be careful not to step in... Oops."

<glare>

"Okay, what do you think about it?"

"It´s a cow."

"Just a cow?"

"Okay, a dead cow."

<sigh> "You're not look~ing. See?"

 "Puncture marks. So?"

<shocked> "So? Do you know what that means?"

"I´m sure there is a perfectly reasonable explanation for that."

"Like what?"

<sigh> "I don´t know. The carcass would have to be checked by forensics first."

"No need. I know what did it!"

<roll of the eyes> "Please, not another vampire theory."

"No vampires. Chupacabra!" <maniacal grin>

<glare> "Doesn´t that beast live in Mexico or somewhere around there?"

<shrug> "Maybe it moved. Decided to take a vacation. Thought that the cows in Kansas look better. Who knows. But I´m sure - it´s Chupacabra!"

<sigh> "At least it´s not the alien conspiracy theory this time."

<wide eyes> "Wow. I didn´t even think about that. I must be rubbing off on ya!" <proud grin>

<groan>

"So... Aliens, huh?"

"No. NO ALIENS!"

<pout> "And why not?"

"Aliens. Do. Not. Exist. There is no evidence of any extraterrestrial life and without any evidence-"

"Evidence? You've seen the pink harpy! Do not tell me that you still believe that a human being can give out a shriek like that. I just remember the ´He~ero´ cry and it gives me goose bumps." <shiver>

<glare>

"And if I proved to you that something like an ´Unidentified Flying Object´ existed, would you then believe that aliens exist?"

<narrowed eyes> "Why?" <suspicious>

"Look."

<wide eyes>

"Well, what do you think is that, Mr. Reasonable?"

"Hn, that´s a space ship."

<nod> "And it isn´t o~urs. So that means..."

"That simply means that there is a space ship on the horizon."

<shocked> "That´s all? What more do you need to believe that there ARE aliens among us? Maybe getting hit over your stubborn head with the ´UFO´?"

<glare> "Spaceship or not. That doesn´t mean that aliens really exist. I´m sure there is a perfectly reasonable explanation for that..."


The End