Virgin Summer: Wanted: Mr Right
 
by KatiKat
 

 
So, the less important things crossed from the list, I thought it was time to get to the core of our little problem... AKA Mr. Right.
 
I´ve never seen my brother look so shocked as when I told him that I made a list of potential lovers for Duo, then went from door to door to actually ask each man if was a) single and b) gay. Yes, in that order. Why? Well, if Duo liked the guy, I could convince him that he IS gay. I would charm him with my personality, then pummel him into the ground if he refused to listen. But would you try the same thing if some girl was hanging around his neck? No? I thought so. Women were unstoppable forces of nature. Like tornadoes. And caused the same amount of mess.
 
But back to my brother. He looked rather shocked at me, then asked if it actually worked. Of course it worked since it was my plan after all. And so, after being backhanded, shouted at, and almost eaten by a monster of a dog, I had the list down to five names. When I showed the mostly crossed off list of names to Odin, he sighed as if wanting to indulge my whim, then patted me on my head and after shaking his head he left the room, muttering something about idiots. Yep, I also thought the guys who would refuse a boy like Duo were truly idiots indeed.
 
So, the list prepared, I picked up the phone receiver and called Duo.
 
*-*-*-*-*
 
"What should the guy actually look like?" I asked when we finally seated ourselves down comfortably.
 
In some weird way, the number of people in my room grew from two to four in a matter of minutes. Me and Duo were usually present. For some odd reason though, Relena kept appearing every time I and Duo met to talk about things. If I didn´t know her better, I would say she was spying on us. But why she would do it was beyond me. So, now she was lying in the pink cloud that was her summer dress on her stomach on my bed, kicking her legs in the air and sucking on her pink lollipop. And then there was my annoying brother of course. Knowing what we would be talking about, he propped himself against the doorway, crossed his arms on his chest and a rather amused smirk lifted up the corners of his mouth.
 
"Look like?" Duo asked, blinking in surprise.
 
"Yeah. You know: height, weight, hair, eyes, the size of his-"
 
Duo blushed and raised his hand, obviously not wanting to speak about this matter again.
 
"So?" I pushed when he didn´t answer my question immediately.
 
Tapping a finger against his lips, Duo looked heavenward as if the answer was written on the ceiling of my room. "We~ll, he shouldn´t be much older than me," he started.
 
I looked down on the list lying on my knee and crossed the first name. Treize Khushrenada. Twenty-six. Yeah, Duo was right. Twent-six meant almost thirty. Which meant old. No, Duo wouldn´t be going out with a grandpa!
 
"He shouldn´t be much taller than me," Duo continued.
 
Another name crossed. I mean, Milliardo Peacecraft? Relena´s brother? If that wasn´t bad enough, he was as tall as the Eiffel Tower. Duo would need a ladder or a stepstool to kiss him. So, young or not, too bad for him that he had to grow up to be so tall.
 
"He wouldn´t have to be a conversationalist, per se, but he would need to know how to express himself."
 
Trowa Barton. Crossed off. Even a goldfish knew how to express itself better than this guy. I mean one of our teachers mistook him for a statue once! Gone, deleted!
 
"He would have to be kind of exotic looking."
 
Exotic? Well, that was the one thing Quatre Winner wasn´t. He was a plushie. Piglet from Winnie the Pooh. Being in his presence made you think of birds, flowers and Easter bunnies. And somehow of... Relena? Must be the pink shirt.
 
That meant only one name remained...
 
"And his hair would have to be kinda messy, you know? The way it just pulls you to run your fingers through it," Duo said dreamily.
 
Messy hair? Wufei with messy hair? I almost shuddered thinking about it. I would bet he was the reason the drug store was always out of hair spray. I mean, sometimes I had the feeling that I could whack him over the head and he wouldn´t even feel it, with the amount of stuff he smeared or sprayed on it. His hair was sacred to him. I wouldn´t like to see Duo with his fingers broken because he touched it, since then I would have to go and find out which of the two of us - me and Wufei - paid better attention in martial arts class. Out!
 
I stared at the list I prepared with such care a little forlornly. Not one match. And I was so careful with my research because, you know, research is everything... Did that mean that there was no one in our little town destined to be Duo´s first?

I sighed… then shrugged. I did my best after all. And Duo was too young for sex anyway. He should wait a year… two… or twenty! I just opened my mouth to make this suggestion when…
 
"Hey!" Relena jumped in, then sat up and bounced on my bed in excitement. "I know a guy who looks like that!" She clapped her hands.
 
"You do?" Duo and I asked at the same moment, surprised.
 
She nodded happily, then raised her hand and pointed. "It´s him!"
 
Everybody turned to Odin who blinked at us, the smile vanishing from his face. Young, short, exotic looking, messy hair... Oh. My. God. It really did fit. But... but... my brother and Duo?
 
EWWWWWWWW!!!
 

TBC