�Is there anything I can do for you, sir, ma�am?� Jen asked, her spine straightening when she remembered that she was in the presence of two senior commissioned officers and, despite their shared reason for being outside sickbay, she was on a completely different, and decidedly lower, level than the two officers who were sitting so close to each other on the small bench.
�No, thank you, Jen,� Harm said, using her given name to let the young girl know that, for the moment at least, they were just three people who cared about Bud J Roberts Jr, that the Colonel and the Commander and the Petty Officer were taking an extended break and they were just Mac and Harm and Jen. Jen nodded, getting the message and managing a small smile in thanks.
Harm swiped at the lingering tears that were starting to make his skin itch and his free hand searched blindly for Mac�s, twining their fingers together once they had found each other. Mac held on tight, the number of times she had almost lost him becoming all too clear in her mind now that her concern for Bud wasn�t taking over every corner of her being.
�Are you feeling better?� Mac asked the Petty Officer, sitting upright.
Jen nodded, blushing slightly as she thought about how close she had come to vomiting on the two people who had been the first good role models she had ever had. The Commander being the man who had introduced her to some of the most amazing people she had ever known, also being the first person to truly believe in her in a long time; the Colonel having willingly opened her home to a total stranger on Christmas and having allowed that same stranger to talk out her problems in her own way, without censor or fear of repercussions.
�I can�t tell you if that�s because the Lieutenant is going to be alright or� the other thing. I think it�s a chicken-egg kind of thing,� Jen said with a small shrug.
Mac chuckled softly, the sound feeling strange after so many hours of tense and fearful silence. Her soft chuckles turned into giddy laughter of exhaustion, relief, and the million other emotions that were pushing for a release, and within a moment Jen had joined in, holding onto her stomach as she slid down the bulkhead, unable to stand any longer.
Taking in the sight of the two women he was with, Harm smiled softly, knowing that their laughter was healthier than his stoicism, but unable to find it within himself to join the pair in their reckless joy.
Too many years of searching for his father had hardened Harm, making it hard for him to allow hope to blossom within him. From the age of six�when he had been helpless to do anything but pray�to only a short time earlier, finding out that his father was dead, had been for many years already. Harm wasn�t able to let go of all his tension yet, and he wouldn�t be until the doctors told him that Bud was out of the woods. That he was stable and had a positive prognosis wasn�t good enough.
So he tightened his grip on Mac�s hand, needing her to stabilize him while he sorted through emotions and fears and thoughts and �what ifs� that came together and beat him about like the waves had when he was lost in that storm on the night of Mac�s aborted wedding.
There was still time, Harm told himself, his eyes drifting to the closed door that hid his long-time friend and one-time prot�g�e from his sight. There was still time for all of them, he decided, and that was all that mattered.
2007