convowithgranny

"Moving" ! 1/17/2002

I told Granny I was moving tonight, here is our conversation:
Me: "So I'm moving"
Granny: "So am I"
Me: "And where are you moving to?"
Granny: "Where old people go"
Me: "Where do old people go?"
Granny: Shrugs shoulders "wooooo, well, someplace"
Me: "Alright then, sounds like a good plan."
Granny: "I am going to put 50,000 dollars into the house, get it fixed up"
Me: "What is going to cost you 50,000 dollars?"
Granny: "Well, the dining room needs to be painted"
Me: "I think you'd better find some new painters"
Granny: "I might die tomorrow"
Me: "I thought you were moving"

"Big Date" 1/ 10/2002

I was getting ready to go on a first date, here is our conversation:
Granny: "Who is this guy?"
Me: "Just a guy I met at a bar. He's nice"
Granny: "Well, tell me about him."
Me: "I'm too nervous to talk"
Granny: "Well, I just want to protect you"
Me: "Thanks"
Granny: "See how I protect you?"
Me: "Yes"
Granny: "Now you can protect me"
Me: "From what?"
Granny: "...The demons."
Me: "Who are the demons?"
Granny: "I don't know"
long awkward silence
Me: "Well, gotta go."

This weeks conversation-
"Marriage" 1/27/2002

Granny practices primogeniture and sexism, here is our conversation:
Granny: "So, you and this new guy, are you in love?"
Me: "We've been dating for three weeks"
Granny: "You're no spring chicken"
Me: "What's that mean?"
Granny: "It's time you think about marriage"
Me: "I'm only 22"
Granny: "I had babies and a husband at 22"
Me: "And that was the norm back then"
Granny: "You're getting too old, and when I die, you're on your own"
Me: "How so?"
Granny: "because only men can handle money"
Me: "That's fine. I'll be fine"
Granny: "You should get married"
Me: "I'm going to bed"