I found out many things that I did not know. Now I know them, and that knowledge has made me wiser. Now I will let you know something that you didn't before...
What you thought I was doing to you, I really wasn't. I have never cheated on you, I have never lied to you, (except for that one time, at which I was saving you from you own suspicions, because nothing happened that one day), I didn't ever wish to be with someone else, I never even thought about it. The only thing I have done was look. I opened my eyes, and moved them in the direction of a passer-by, but nothing more. I have never said to myself "I would really love to be with this guy" or "I wonder how he is at making out" I have never thought of any of that stuff. I never wanted to learn more about another person of the opposite sex. I never wondered if one of the passer-by's were single, or if I will ever talk to them or see them again.
One thing that I have never done, that really did hurt is use the word "perfect" for someone else, of the opposite sex. Using that towards someone else, and then covering it up with the last few words: "but I wanted you" doesn't make a diff. Using that word for someone else hurt because it says to me, that you DID think about all those things I have not. It says to me that you want to be with someone else as much as, or even more then u want to be with me. It says to me "Hey, that girl is perfect, but I can settle for you" It says to me that you have been thinking of someone else, something I have not done to you...
I didn't know how much something like this can hurt so much. I didn't know that one word would affect me so much. I didn't know that YOU of all people would do something like this to me.
I didn't know, that I can get any more depressed then I have been in the past...
I didn't know what I know now... and now that I know... I AM SORRY!
Some say that trust takes years to build, but only a second of suspicion to destroy.
I don't believe that.
