The
stage is more beholding to love, that the life of man. For as to the stage, love
is ever matter of comedies, and now and then of tragedies; but in life it doth
much mischief; sometimes like a siren, sometimes like a fury. You may observe,
that amongst all the great and worthy persons (whereof the memory remaineth,
either ancient or recent) there is not one, that hath been transported to the
mad degree of love: which shows that great spirits, and great business, do keep
out this weak passion. You must except, nevertheless, Marcus Antonius, the half
partner of the empire of Rome, and Appius Claudius, the decemvir and lawgiver;
whereof the former was indeed a voluptuous man, and inordinate; but the latter
was an austere and wise man: and therefore it seems (though rarely) that love
can find entrance, not only into an open heart, but also into a heart well
fortified, if watch be not well kept. It is a poor saying of Epicurus,
Satis magnum alter alteri theatrum sumus; as if man, made for the contemplation
of heaven, and all noble objects, should do nothing but kneel before a little
idol and make himself a subject, though not of the mouth (as beasts are), yet of
the eye; which was given him for higher purposes. It is a strange thing, to note
the excess of this passion, and how it braves the nature, and value of things,
by this; that the speaking in a perpetual hyperbole, is comely in nothing but in
love. Neither is it merely in the phrase; for whereas it hath been well said,
that the arch-flatterer, with whom all the petty flatterers have intelligence,
is a man's self; certainly the lover is more. For there was never proud man
thought so absurdly well of himself, as the lover doth of the person loved; and
therefore it was well said, That it is impossible to love, and to be wise.
Neither doth this weakness appear to others only, and not to the party loved;
but to the loved most of all, except the love be reciproque. For it is a true
rule, that love is ever rewarded, either with the reciproque, or with an inward
and secret contempt. By how much the more, men ought to beware of this passion,
which loseth not only other things, but itself! As for the other losses, the
poet's relation doth well figure them: that he that preferred Helena, quitted
the gifts of Juno and Pallas. For whosoever esteemeth too much of amorous
affection, quitteth both riches and wisdom. This passion hath his floods, in
very times of weakness; which are great prosperity, and great adversity; though
this latter hath been less observed: both which times kindle love, and make it
more fervent, and therefore show it to be the child of folly. They do best, who
if they cannot but admit love, yet make it keep quarters; and sever it wholly
from their serious affairs, and actions, of life; for if it check once with
business, it troubleth men's fortunes, and maketh men, that they can no ways be
true to their own ends. I know not how, but martial men are given to love: I
think, it is but as they are given to wine; for perils commonly ask to be paid
in pleasures. There is in man's nature, a secret inclination and motion, towards
love of others, which if it be not spent upon some one or a few, doth naturally
spread itself towards many, and maketh men become humane and charitable; as it
is seen sometime in friars. Nuptial love maketh mankind; friendly love
perfecteth it; but wanton love corrupteth, and embaseth it.