Birth Order and Your Personality: 8 Facts That Might Surprise You

Does your birth order shape your personality? Whether you're a first-born, middle or only-child, check out this excerpt from The Birth Order and find out!

Only-Borns

Positives:  Only-borns are the mega-movers of the world. They are task-oriented; tend to be extremely well organized, very conscientious and ultimately dependable. They love facts, ideas, and details, and feel extremely comfortable with responsibility.

Negatives: Only-born negatives can be tough to handle. They are often unforgiving, very demanding, hate to admit they're wrong, and usually don't accept criticism well. To others, they seem very sensitive and indeed, their feelings are easily hurt.

First-Borns

Positives: They are natural leaders. They represent United States presidents, astronauts, and CEOs by overwhelming numbers. They frequently live with a sense of entitlement and even superiority. They often come in two flavors: compliant nurturers/caregivers or aggressive movers and shakers. Both are in control; they just use different methods. As a rule, first-borns are picky, precise people -they love paying attention to details -- and they tend to be punctual, organized, and competent. They want to see things done right the first time. They don't like surprises.

Negatives: They are often moody and occasionally lack sensitivity. They can be intimidating, particularly by pushing people too hard or refusing to take no for an answer. Sometimes they can be a bit of "know-it-all," and often are poor delegators, in large part because they don't trust other people as much as they trust themselves. They also tend to be bossy, flaw pickers, and conscientious to a fault.

Middle-Borns

Positives:  The classic middle-born is very relational, tends to be a people-pleaser and usually hates confrontation. Their basic need is to keep the oceans of life smooth, and their motto might be “Peace at any price.” They are usually very calm, will roll with the punches, and are amiable, down-to-earth, and great listeners. They are skilled at seeing both sides of a problem and eager to make everybody happy. That makes them good mediators and negotiators.

Negatives:  They tend to be less driven than first-borns, but are much more desirous of having everybody like them -- or at least happy with them. They have a difficult time setting boundaries. They can drift into becoming “co-dependents” as they try to please everybody. They are not good at making decisions that will offend others. They also tend to blame themselves when others fail.

Last-Borns

Positives:  You're probably one of the world's cheerleaders. You have strong people skills and love to entertain and talk to others. You're the type of person who never met a stranger; you can immediately make others feel at home. You're an extrovert, energized by the presence of other people, and you're probably not afraid to take a risk now and then.

Negatives:  They tend to get bored rather quickly. They have a strong fear of rejection and a short attention span. When the fun stops, they want to check out. They're somewhat self-centered. They may doom more relationships due to their unrealistic expectations of finding a relationship that is always marked by fun and of course, such relationships simply don't exist for long.

*From The Birth Order Connection (Revell, September 2001)