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Gracie and Kass are Born |
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I am a calm person. So calm that I have a friend who jokes that if I ever severed an arm, I would not |
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call 911, I would call the doctor's office and wait for an appointment later that week. Well...she may not be that far off...because when I went into premature labor with the twins at 30 weeks gestation, I drove myself to the hospital, complaining of a severe backache, cramping, and some bleeding.
Needless to say, they immediately admitted me. I was in complete denial for the first few hours. I didn't want to give birth again out of town. I didn't |
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This picture is by Anne Geddes |
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want to have them premature, as my first daughter was, and have health problems. I kept telling the nurses "No!" to everything, including when they asked me my name, my due date, and if I wanted any pain relief. |
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At 11:50 that night, I gave birth to the first twin. She was tiny, but she was breathing on her own and was healthy and pink. The nurses quickly cleaned her up and checked her vitals. All I remember is laying propped up in bed, trying to get a glimpse of the baby. After what seemed like an eternity (but it was only a minute or two), a nurse brought me this tiny |
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naked baby, and placed her on my chest. The baby was a girl, the nurse said. And she weighed 3 lbs. 9 oz. When I laid my eyes on that baby, I started to cry. I couldn't believe that this little baby ("Baby A") had been inside of me, waiting to be born. She was a piece of me. I immediately named her Alysse.
After a few moments with Alysse, the nurses took the baby back to be bathed and diapered and I concentrated on this other baby that wanted to be born. "Baby B" was in a breech position, but the doctor seemed confident that I could still birth her, as her knees weren't bent and she was so small. She came quickly, but the pain involved was something that I do not wish to repeat. At 11:57 PM, the second baby, an identical twin to the first baby, was born. Except she didn't breathe on her own and she was blue all over. She was bigger than her sister, at 4 lbs. 1 oz., but she needed oxygen and suctioning. I watched helplessly as they worked on her. I only caught glimpses of this limp baby, and I feared for her. She reminded me of my little cousin, Nicole, who, as a toddler, used to hold her breath until she passed out when angry. I immediately named this second baby Nicole. |
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After the twins were born, I was sent into a regular hospital room and the twins were held in the nursery. They were both on oxygen and Alysse could not suck (thus could not eat). Both twins looked like they would come out of the hospital and be healthy, but they were both very tiny and needed some help.
By 2:00 AM on November 15, I lay in my hospital bed, having just made the necessary phone calls to let family and friends know that the twins were born already. I looked about the hospital room and out the window, out to the lights of a foreign town. I thought of my two babies, hooked up to monitors and oxygen in the nursery. And I knew in my heart that I could not parent them. I could not stretch so thin as to care for two high-needs (preemie) babies. I reached over to the phone and called |
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This is a cool story about
the bond that twins share
CLICK HERE to read it |
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information for Sandy and Bill's phone number and then I called them. They would probably be out of town, I thought to myself. They were probably not home. They probably aren't interested in adoption anymore. They must have written me off a long time ago. Maybe they've already adopted another baby. They probably turn their ringer off at night. They might be angry with me. They probably won't remember who I am. Maybe they moved.
Sandy's groggy voice picked up the receiver on the third ring. I bluntly told her that the babies were born. She woke up right away, and congratulated me. She then verified that the babies had been born early, and asked how they were. I then asked if she and Bill were still interested in adoption. She said yes, and then I started to cry, asking her if they wanted to come meet the girls. That Sandy and Bill drove across
the state, with no more information than there were two tiny babies is something I will. |
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be forever thankful for. |
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For More on Gracie and Kass, Click HERE |
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