I do not want to hear it.  Not one word of negative, pansy, hand wringing, defeatism.  I do not want to hear the voices of fear. Fear that you might wish and hope so much for a victory that you begin to believe that it will happen.  Then if it doesn’t happen you feel sad.  Well boo freakin’ hoo.  Teddy Roosevelt had some words about “those cold and timid souls on the sidelines, who know neither victory nor defeat”.  So if you wish to remain a skeptic, go ahead, be a Buckeye fan in good times only, be that way.  But if that is your course, then, when we win this game, stay the hell away from me. I don’t want your high fives, I don’t want your hugs, and I don’t want to see your tears of happiness.  You have no right to share the joy this win will bring.  Those should be tears of shame because you didn’t have the emotional courage to believe.  To believe in the upset,  to believe in your Buckeyes.   But you don’t have to follow that cowardly course.  You can dare to care.  You can believe….. and I’m going to tell you why!

                This “juggernaut” of a team from Ann Arbor is led by Lloyd Carr.  Doesn’t he sound like Darth Vader?  Can’t you just hear him telling recruits, “Luke, come over to the dark side”?  Anyone who thinks Lloyd is a coaching genius has been asleep for the last decade or so.  Can we all agree that he can be out-coached, that the possibility does exist.  Just look at Coach Tress’s first team he took into Ann Arbor and came out with a win.  They were decided underdogs and it was on the road.  The true Buckeyes who made that trip, or who believed in what Tress said in his inaugural address, they knew the joy.  This year the game is being played in Columbus is it not?  Before we even discuss home field advantage, let’s just look at the Weasels as a road team.  They have won road games at Indiana, Illinois, and Purdue.  None of those venues strike fear in the heart of the visiting team.  Indiana and Illinois are awful football teams who would finish in the bottom half of the MAC. Purdue, when the Weasels played them, was a good, but not great team.  The Weasels won only when the Boilers turned the ball over on their last drive.  A closely contested game, decided by turnovers; much like the one we just had with those same Boilers in the same location.  And let’s face it Ross-Aide Stadium in West Lafayette, Indiana is not Death Valley.  In the one respectable road venue they visited this year, the weasels lost to a pretty mediocre Notre Dame team in South Bend. This team has done nothing on the road, nothing! 

                OK let’s talk about why Columbus should be a hotbed of football hostility.  Are you sick of the Clarett mess?  It is the Weasel’s fault.  Are you tired of former basketball coaches suing our university?  Blame the weasels.  Karen Holbrook has taken much of the fun and most of the beer out of tailgating.  Ms. Holbrook is just a Weasel in Doberman Pinscher’s clothing.  Unhappy with our 6-4 record, you know as well as I do it is all the fault of the maize and blue.  Upset about the injuries to our secondary?  Purely the fault of the weasels..  Osama Bin Laden …a weasel.  Unemployment ….. caused by the weasels.  Shortage of the flu vaccine?  Obviously caused by greedy Weasels. Those are just reasons if you are not a college football fan to hate the Weasels.  If you are a college football fan you already know why to hate the weasels.  There will be a Shoe-full of hostility when the weasels come to  town on Saturday.  Our defense should be able to feed off our fury.  And if we make enough noise, guess what?  We can bring back the ghosts.  That won’t be Nate Salley hitting weasel receivers it will be Jack Tatum.  It will be Jim Otis carrying the ball on third and short.  When the weasel D-line looks across the LOS, they will see Jim Parker, Korey Stringer, Olando Pace, and Dave Foley.  That’s right, if the crowd makes enough noise the ghosts of Buckeyes past will return to haunt and punish the weasels.  You gotta know Jim Stillwagon will not only stuff the run, but he’ll be good for a couple of sacks. Somewhere, deep in the bowels of the OSU locker room Archie and Pete are cleaning their cleats, saying “Played em four times, never lost to no damn weasels”.  And, of course we all know who will be prowling the sidelines inside of a body looking like that of Jim Tressel.  Warn the photographers to keep their distance, tell the chain gang to stay loose.  That’s right the “Old Man” is coming back for one more game and he is not in a good mood!

                They are starting a true-freshman quarterback!  A kid who was in high school six months ago!   He said he has been booed before, during his last season of high school ball, after he announced his college choice. Even   Pennsylvanians hate weasels. Did he just compare a high school crowd to Ohio Stadium?  Do you really think he has any idea of what he’s in for?  Can we get in his head, maybe show him that playing in Ohio Stadium is just a little different?   The crowd noise and ghosts can pressure Henne into playing like the freshman he is.  Braylon will hear footsteps of Buckeyes as he drops pass after pass.  How better to welcome Michael Hart, yet another true freshman, to The Rivalry by allowing him to have his first 3-fumble game in Columbus?  .  Fans…. Don’t go hoping that the Buckeyes win, go to help the Buckeyes win.  This should be the no-audible zone for the weasels.  We all get Buckeye leafs for every delay of game and procedure penalty on the weasels.  The weather will be rainy,… upset weather.  The crowd has an extra hour of prep time due to the later than normal 1:00 kick.  It is all coming together for the big upset. 

                On the national scene…. there are no other football games this week.

                Last week in the Big Ten, ……there is no last week.  There is only…  now.  So Buckeyes, now is the time to tighten up those chin straps and dare to care, because we are setting a big old weasel trap.  The road to Pasadena is going to hit one hell of a speed bump in Columbus, Ohio.