| Death of an R-Package (Cont.) (or, Toad's Big Crash) |
| The day after Toad's accident, he visited his Miata in the wrecking yard. The remains of the car made him shudder. The rear end was nothing but twisted metal and broken plastic, jammed up almost to the back convertible window. The front end was foreshortened by about half a foot, with the pop-up headlights peeking wall-eyed out of their sockets. The doors overlapped the body openings. The windshield had a crack on the passenger�s side. Every body panel was warped. The Good Samaritan�s towel lay on the rear window ledge, stiff with Toad's dried blood. He thought it nothing short of incredible that here he was the following day, walking around, taking photos of this grotesque wreck. Had he not been wearing his seatbelt and shoulder harness, Toad would not have been taking photos, nor I writing this sentence. Some views of the wreckage are provided here (just click on the underlined link): Photo 1. Photo 2. That special R-Package front spoiler won't do much for these aerodynamics. Photo 3. The license plate is still bolted to the rear panel, which has been displaced a bit. Photo 4. Here's where the fill-up was done just the previous day - not a drop spilled! Photo 5. Not quite the sleek machine she used to be. That next day, Toad also telephoned the driver of the Honda van that had been immediately in front of him. She had watched the whole accident evolve in her rear view mirror. While waiting for the red light to change, she had glanced in the mirror, and noticed the Miata stopped behind her. Then she looked in the mirror farther back on Whiskey Road and saw this large black vehicle coming. And coming. And coming. She watched horrified as the black vehicle slammed into Toad's car, his car was forced against the rear of her van, and then her van was pushed into the vehicle in front of her. All for no rational reason. This was not in heavy traffic. The light had not just changed. No one had made a lane change in two blocks. It was just sheer, utter carelessness (or worse) on the part of the driver in the black vehicle. After he hung up the phone, Toad become increasingly livid. Before long he was outside, storming around the Mews of Toad Hall, shouting ever louder to no one in particular: "Terrorists? Everyone�s focus is on international terrorism. Why bother? We have got plenty of terrorists already here!" Toad took a deep breath and continued his tirade: "They have been here for decades. They are called American drivers. And they are legions in the enthusiastic service of Osama bin Stupid!" By this point there was no stopping Toad: "These terrorists have sworn to demonstrate a single digit IQ whenever they get behind the wheel of a vehicle. In one month, these road terrorists kill and maim more than the number of people who died in the outrage of 9/11. Month in and month out, every year. In one day, these same road terrorists kill more Americans than have died in the worst month of hostilities in Iraq. Day in and day out, 365 days a year, every year. Not even the strongest military in the world can deal with these terrorists." Toad ranted on until he was exhausted. Eventually, Ratty dropped by to brew a cuppa and settle Toad down. Ratty soothed: "Fortunately, in this village at least, whenever one of these road terrorists strike, there always seem to be one or more Good Samaritans present to ease the pain." Toad only looked off in the distance and murmured: "If only there were no need for Good Samaritans..." God only knows what Toad was planning next. |
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| Consumer Warning This page contains links to graphic photos which may bring tears to the eyes of true Miata enthusiasts. |